The Underground City

It was an unusually cold day for Summer in Danville. Phineas and Ferb were just getting ready for breakfast when they overheard Candace talking loudly to her mother. It seemed, from the gist of the argument, that due to the cold her mother had told her to wear a coat, but, wanting Jeremy to see her in her new skirt, she had protested against this. At long last she gave in and took the coat, but as soon as she reached the bust stop (for she was headed for the Mall) she deposited it behind a bush. Meanwhile Phineas and Ferb had got downstairs and had begun to eat their breakfast, of milk and cereal, and their mother looked at her watch with a worried look on her face. "What's the matter, mom?" asked Phineas, "Why do you look so worried?" "Oh it's nothing... just that your father said he'd be downstairs five minutes ago. We're going to meet some friends for a game of bowling at the alley" "I didn't know you were into bowling" "Well... it's your father who is into it mostly... but I try to take an interest in what he likes" "Guess that makes sense" said Phineas, as Ferb examined the plastic toy that came with their cereal. "What did we get, Ferb?" "Another yellow unicorn" "Oh well... let's hope we find that golden unicorn tommorow" Their mother had gone upstairs to fetch their father and when she returned they saw them both dressed in coats. Their father said "It's strange isn't it boys? This cold spell... in the middle of Summer" "Have a great time bowling mom, dad" said Phineas. "We will" said their parents. "Well Ferb, I can't think of anything to do today. Let's watch some tv"

Candace sat next to Stacy on a food court seat. She held her mobile in her hand and said "You see I've set up this surveillance system of spy cameras about the house. That way whenever Phineas and Ferb are up to something all I have to do is press record, and it saves the footage on my phone. Then I can show mom and they'll be so busted!" "Candace... you really need to see someone and get some help..." "Stacy, I tell you I'm not joking. They're always doing stuff... And soon I'll be able to prove it!" At that moment Jeremy arrived and sat next to the girls. "Hello Candace, Stacy" "Hello Jeremy" said Candace. "I like your new haircut" "Actually I've got a new dress" "Yes i saw that too... but your new haircut is really... something. It's great to see you're being an individual- not letting those conformist trends control your personality!" Candace began to feel worried. "What do you mean? I haven't got a new haircut" "Well something about your do looks different..." Candace, wondering what could be wrong, took a mirror from Stacy and observed herself closely. "Oh no... In my rush to get to the mall, and my argument with mom... I must have forgotten to comb my hair! This is a disaster!" "I think it looks nice, Candace. It really says a lot about your care free attitude to life and how you don't care what others think about y-" "Sorry Jeremy, Stacy- but I've got to go comb my hair in the bathroom!" "-Oh well... I guess it did look a bit messy. Hey Stacy, did you watch American Idol last night? I thought Donna was awful..."

Meanwhile, as Candace's attention was diverted from Phineas and Ferb by Jeremy and her bad hair day situation, the boys were busy watching tv. It being a Saturday there were cartoons on. "Hey Ferb, this cartoon gives me an idea! You know how they've gone underground in that burrowing machine... and discovered that underground city inhabited by the mole creatures? I think I know what we're going to do today!"

Candace had combed her hair and now returned to find Jeremy and Stacy engaged in a conversation about movies. Sitting down she looked at her phone. Phineas and Ferb were nowhere to be seen. "Aha! I knew they'd be up to something while I was gone! Now to simply wait until they come back and bust them!" "Hey Candace" "Er yes Jeremy?" "Would you like to come see a movie with me-" "I'd love to!" "-and Stacy and some of my friends?" "I'd... love to" They went to the cinema. "Let's see... which film should we watch?" said Jeremy. One of his friends said "Well seeing as you're buying the tickets you should choose" "Yeah... but maybe Candace would like to?" Candace blushed and said her choice. They went in and sat down, and waited for the film to start. Candace sat next to Jeremy. Phineas and Ferb could be trying to take over the world all she cared.

Phineas and Ferb were of course not trying to take over the world, but, rather had built a burrowing machine, with a screw at the front which turned, allowing it to bury deep into the Earth's underground. Isabella had been invited to come along, and Buford and Baljeet joined them too. With that spirit of adventure and imagination so alive in kids during the holidays Phineas declared himself Captain Phineas of the Flynn and Fletcher Centre of the Earth Expedition Team. Ferb was given title of First Mate, and Buford was Skipper. Isabella was given the title of Master and Baljeet that of Commander. "And to think" said Ferb as the machine made it's first metres of progress downwards- "that none of us know what any of our titles mean" "Except me of course, everyone knows what the Captain is" said Phineas. "Ay ay Captain" added Isabella. "Donward we go then" said Phineas, who broke into song. "Downward we go then, downward we go. Downward we go then, downward we go. Going ever deeper, Digging ever further, Downward we go then, downward we go! Nothing is more easier- than dropping down below! In our tunnelling machine, downward we go! Downward to the centre of the planet!" Isabella clapped and Phineas bowed. Then she said "Wait a minute, didn't you say your platypus was coming with you?" "That's a point Isabella! Where's Perry?"

Perry had managed to sneak away to the secret message receiving room beforehand and was now on his way to Doofenshmirtz's skyscraper. Monogram's information had been vague, and all he was aware of was that Doofenshmirtz had purchased a copious amount of clay, string, and coal. When he arrived he crashed through the window to find his enemy seated at a potter's wheel, hard at work shaping a vase. "Ahh, Perry! You're just in time to see my first piece. And look- not a single imperfection! And now to simply lift it from the wh- Ooh dear! Oh now I shall have to begin all over again. Well Perry, seeing as we are old acquaintances... I may as well let you into a little secret. That wasn't my first attempt at making pottery" Doofenshmirtz threw the fallen creation into a pile of broken clay vessels near six metres high. "Well now that you're here Perry, perhaps we can do some pottery together? I bought this little miniature wheel just for you. See? It has a miniature kiln and everything" Perry sat at the wheel and began to turn it but all of a sudden a net fell and trapped him, held down by four clay weights at it's corners, crudely shapen. "Aha! You fell for my trap, Perry! And now to show you my real plan! You see, ever since I was a little boy in Druselstain I have been worse at everything my brother does. He always bettered me at everything. Except pottery. His one weakness is my one opportunity to beat him once and for all! He was never very gifted at making pottery, you see- and if I become a master potter he shall have to acknowledge I have finally bettered him at something!" Perry looked about him but didn't see anything particularly evil in any of this. "So you see, I plan, once I have refined my potter's skills- to contruct a giant statue of myself of clay and place it where his statue is, after destroying his statue with my Statue Destroy-inator. As Mayor he gets a fancy statue in the park in the centre of town... and once I replace his statue with my likeness- then he shall have to admit defeat! Now, let's see... maybe this time it will work" The vessel he had been making fell spectacularly. "Curse you, Roger! But I shall better you, just you see!"

Meanwhile Phineas and Ferb's machine had burrowed near to the mantle and it had got very hot within the machine. "Luckily for us, I have installed a temperature regulator. It's cutting edge stuff" "How does it work, Phineas?" asked a curious Isabella. "Well... that I don't know... But the salesman says it's cutting edge." Phineas switched on the regulator which made the inside of the machine a comfortable room temperature. They spent some hours enjoying the ride, playing games and so forth.

"Wow Phineas, we must be near the centre now! Look at all the molten rock!" said a fascinated Isabella. "Yes, we're nearing the outer core now. If we keep our speed steady we will reach the centre of the Earth in two hours time!" "I'll put a roll of film in my camera" said Buford. Looks were given at him. "Not that I'm into photography or anything... I mean we are going to the centre of the Earth... we might as well take a picture of the occasion" "Yeah... I guess you're right Buford. It's not every day we do this sort of thing. Hello... the density reader is showing an odd anomaly ahead of us" Buford "A what?" "It means theres a bubble of air within all this molten rock... And we're headed straight for it" Isabella then said "But what caused it? How did a bubble get down here?" "It is surprising... the intense heat down here doesn't convert solid and liquid to gas because it's kept at a high pressure. But perhaps... Hmm... It certainly seems odd. We will hit it in about five minutes. Perhaps we should stop and have a look at it. It's as big as a city"

Meanwhile Doofenshmirtz had got so frustrated by the failure of his pottery creations to stay in shape that he decided to build the statue of cement and pour it into a mould. "Now Perry, i shall just be at the cement store. Don't touch anything while i'm gone okay? Hmm... I will need to construct the statue in hundreds of moulds and then fit them together, or the cement would take too long to cool down. I'd better visit the hardware store too" Perry looked about him for a means to escape. The net was held fast by the heavy clay weights at it's corners, but, seeing it was held in place from above by a long rope that was fastened to a wooden beam, which connected with the trap's mechanics, Perry pulled on the rope and upset the wooden beam which fell at a fast pace and knocked Doofesnhmirtz down. It was but a simple matter then to inform Monogram by Doofenshmirtz's mobile phone of his success. Monogram then sent Roger a message explaining that he should install security guards on patrol about the park's statue to prevent any funny business. Perry then made his escape. "Curse you Perry the platypus!"

Meanwhile Candace and Jeremy had finished watching the film, and, being in no hurry to let him out of her sight, Candace invited him to her place, knowing he was welcome any time to come. They walked alone together all the way home and came across Perry, who, having seen a giant hole indicative of the burrowing machine's progress in the backyard, had gone to the front yard to distract them. "Oh, isn't he a cute little fellow" said Jeremy. "I'm glad you like him. He isn't that interesting, seeing as platypus don't really do anything, but I guess he's kinda cute" Perry knew there was little he could do now, but this was fine, because it seemed his plan was working. Jeremy having picked him up took him within and he was seated with them on the couch (the television having been left on). Now Candace and Jeremy were happily together and away from the hole.

The air pocket had finally appeared. The machine fell through it fast, and soon what appeared like a grid appeared beneath them, with glowing lines making it up. "Huh, that's an odd phenomenom" said Phineas, consulting his Guide to Scientific Phenomenae and Their Causes. "It may be phosphorescant rock... No... The pattern doesn't make any sense for that to be the case... Huh... I could swear those were little people walking along little str... Hey Ferb! I think we've come across a underground city!" "But who built it?" inquired Isabella. "Hmm... perhaps an ancient race who once lived above ground but were forced below by famine and evolved to withstand the heat... No... evolution isn't fast enough for that... that would be impossible... It would require massive amounts of burrowing and hard work which even today would be impossible. It must be a race from another planet!" The machine came to the other side of the pocket and then Phineas reversed it and returned to the surface of the pocket, like an inverse world where the atmosphere was rock and the planet air. Even miniature weather conditions were evident, in small cloud formations and wind. Having got out of their machine Phineas and Ferb and their friends found themselves in a city street, but built of rock and glowing with green rather than white lights. There were cars and people, but not people like on the surface of the planet. They were alien looking. "Hey Ferb, these look like those aliens we saw at our star... Perhaps they're related" "But how did they get down here?" asked Isabella. "That is a very long story indeed" replied a voice from behind them, and they turned to see an alien looking at them, wearing a sash that indicated he was of some social importance. "I am Mayor Wazpuqwath, of the city of Tarawalazyagon. I have been expecting you for some time. I knew sooner or later you'd visit the centre of the Earth. We Tarawalazyagonians were once from a once very distant and quite small planet called Valros, which collided with the Earth during it's formation. Valros had a much hotter climate than you experience today, but Earth's temperature then was near our old planets, so when Valros broke up our city became part of the Earth. The rest of Valros became the planet you know as Mars." "So there was life on Mars after all?" asked Buford. "No... there was water, certainly, for a short period after the planet had cooled and at atmosphere formed, but after a while greenhouse effects soon eroded away the atmosphere. Our city is the only part of Valros to have survived. We know of you and your civilization because we have very advanced technology, we have devices which allow us to, using radar and a system similar to television, see what is happening anywhere in the galaxy. The aliens of which you speak are indeed relatives of ours, and we both originate from the same history, on a planet called Mylidar." "So... you aren't hostile or anything are you?" asked Baljeet. "No, we shall not harm you. But we certainly would be happy to tell you more about Valros... if you'd like" "Oh well that's great, but I think we have to go, our mom will expect us home for dinner in three hours" "Oh well. It was nice meeting you Phineas" "Hey" said Buford, "If you know about everything... do you know what will happen to us in the future? What jobs we'll get?" "No... we can certainly scan any part of the galaxy with our radar machine... but we only scan one place at a time... and we can not predict the future. Well, good day to you, young travellers!" And so Phineas Ferb and their friends left the underground alien city in their burrowing machine.

When they arrived back at the surface of Earth they parked the machine in the garage just as their parents arrived home. Phineas and Ferb went upstairs to get ready for dinner, and Candace and Jeremy were still watching tv together. Her parents arrived and asked whether the boys had been up to anything that day unusual. Candace replied she didn't think they had. She had been so busy enjoying her time with Jeremy that she's completely forgotten about them. "You should spend more time with Jeremy dear. It seems to cure your insanity" Just then Phineas and Ferb came downstairs for dinner, and their mother inquired where Perry was. "He's on the couch with Candace and Jeremy I think" said Phineas. And so he was. "I think I'll go and water the flower bed in the back yard" said his mother. The hole where the machine had burrowed was still there.

It may be proper at this point to explain why the burrowing machine had not created a volcanic effect, after all, it had tunnelled deep into the Earth. Well the machine did create a path for itself, but, the pressures of the Earth being so high, and our old friend gravity having a prominent part to play, the magma had merely refilled the hole after the machine had passed, so as not to leave any trace of it ever having been there. However of course at the surface conditions are, whilst similar, less aesthetically pleasing, as of course the lawn was still destroyed in the area where the machine had burrowed, and there was still a hole and an area of dirt to mark it's having tunnelled in that vicinity.

But as Phineas and Ferb's mother was about to water the flowers and spot the hole, Phineas and Ferb's father was showing off the bowling trophy they'd won, and their mother decided the flowers were fine as it wasn't that hot a day, so went back inside and didn't see the hole. And what became of it? Well it just so happened that Perry, having managed to escape from notice by Candace of Jeremy just before dinner was served, went to the backyard and pulled an inflatable pool over it to cover it. And so, when the hole was finally discovered, the blame went not to Phineas and Ferb but to the manufacturer of the pool, and so yet another adventure came to a close, leaving Phineas and Ferb to consider what they would do the next day.