Black was a blissful, little man as he peered at his badge case, right at his newest win, the Beetle Badge. Not because he won. Oh, no, that was half of it. The other half was that he could finally get the hell out of that gym, my god. He will never walk into that gym where you got tickled by clowns or into those gooey walls that touched you in all the wrong places until you're done being molested.
Hell, the worst part about the gym was the freakin' gym leader, Artie. Right when they began battling, "Living in the Moonlight" by Tiny Tim started to mysteriously blast throughout the gym. Artie began to hysterically cackle nonstop as he dug his hands down his fruity patooty pantaloons. The only reason why Black won, anyway, was because he spilled all of Artie's paint. All over the gym leader's nipples.
And as the paint poured down his front, Black made a quick tactical decision and chucked his last Pokeball straight at Artie's head.
And caught him.
Right now Black was heading north of Hiun City to get the hell out of there before any of those clowns started to chase and scream at him to GO TO BED. There were so many dudes in business suits down the alley attending to strip clubs as he zipped past until he made it to Hiun's park. He was parched to the bone, so he decided to stop to one of them vending machines until he alertly saw a Yu-Gi-Oh! character.
Wait, no, it was just N; nonetheless, Black thought he was creepy as hell and shed a lot. Last time he saw him, it was at a restaurant. When that dude left after giving Black an ironic lecture on how POKEMON SHOULD BE FREEeee! AND THAT TRAINERS ARE EEEEBILLLL! oh by the way, we're friends : D, Black found a two-foot long piece of green hair in his chicken soup. Black vomited a lot that day.
Remembering this, Black formed a stealthy beeline towards the vending machine to get a nice, nipply bottle of aqua until he saw it happen.
When Black was wheezing for water and smoothing out his dollar for the fifth time for the vending machine to finally take it, he turned his head at N, hoping not to be seen. Instead he saw the most frightening image ever to happen on Isshu soil not too far away.
N was sitting on a park bench. But not any kind of park bench. A park bench with gum on it. But not any kind of gum. A chewed up kind of gum.
While N was sitting on the park bench, reading the Bible, he peered down at this particular gum and felt his wild side tingling. After he examined the area around him (missing Black, who was quick enough to hide behind the vending machine-but hey-there were also three break-dancers who weren't paying attention), he pulled the hard ball of gum off the arm rest with some struggle and popped it in his mouth. He crunched so loud the Mamepatos around him heard and were like, "What the fuck is this shit?"
Black felt the bratwurst he devoured earlier starting to rise up as horrible flashbacks of him and that soup reemerged like a horror movie scene on repeat. Then one of his Pokeballs opened, and Artie came out and smacked him down, screaming, "HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW, BITCH?", henceforth teabagging him. N swallowed his gum and got constipation that day as he hacked out some hairballs, but he never learned.