AN:WARNING this is Femslash meaning it is a lesbian story and it will contain Female/Female interaction, if this is of offence to you then please move on to the next story.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Twilight and all it's characters soley belongs to Stepanie Meyer. I do however own my OC's.

Side note: Italics = Flashback

CH 1: Why?

I remember everything as if it had happened yesterday.

"Bella!"

I try to stop it but, it's inevitable, I can't escape it.

"Come play with me Bells!"

Without meaning or wanting to I get sucked up into my memories, the day everything changed, my worst fear realized. I was all alone.

Flashback

"Bella!"

I remember this day well it was my Fifteenth birthday today, my coming of age ceremony was finally here and I was excited to be considered an adult among my peers and finally taken seriously. Unfortunately with my new adult status comes new responsibilities, so I'm assuming that's why my little brother is here now, because it is my last day to be a kid, to play and be carefree.

"Come play with me Bells!"

Shaking my head in amusement I respond "Hmm, I don't know Leo. I'm kind of busy being an adult." I say jokingly.

Leo pouts "But Beeellllllaaa! Being an adult is so boring. Pretty please play with me? I won't bug you anymore after today I promise!" He begs. I know that's a lie, he uses that excuse all the time, but I can't help but give into his cute little pout and he knows it.

I finally concede "Alright alright you little brat, but after today no more, deal?" He nods his head enthusiastically which makes me giggle slightly.

Leo and I move out to the open fields not to far from the village to play tag, this amuses him mostly since his speed far outmatches my own. After a few hours of me mostly trying to catch him we decide to call it quits we must return in order to be prepared on time for my ceremony. As we near our family home Leo and I notice our older brother Connor storm out the front door in a rage, Leo runs up to him asking whats wrong when Connor very abruptly shoves him back, causing Leo to fall to the ground.

"Hey! What do you think your doing Connor?!" I yell giving him a scathing glare, Connor seems to recoil slightly as if what he had just done only now dawned on him, but he says nothing and his face changes to a mask of indifference.

Still glaring I ask "Well?" still no response, then he turns and storms off leaving me to pick up and dust off Leo. "You okay Leo?" I ask concerned. All I get in response is a weak smile and a shrug of his shoulders.

Frowning I stare Leo down until he finally cracks under my gaze "Yeah, don't worry sis I'm fi-" I cut him off "Don't lie Leo I can see how hurt you are, and I don't mean physically." He goes to open his mouth but a pointed look from me makes him snap his mouth shut "Don't take his anger personally Leo, Connor has been acting out lately it's no surprise he pushed you away he has been that way with everyone. I'm sure he didn't mean it." I say with an attempt at a reassuring smile but it comes out as more of a grimace. In the end it has the affect I wan't and Leo's smile widens and becomes more genuine. Just then our father comes storming out of the house and head's in the direction Connor went.

"Father!" "Dad!" Leo and I both call out to him, either he ignores it or he didn't hear us. Leo goes to take off after him but I hold him back as I take in our father's body language, his fists are clenched so tight his knuckles are white and his shoulders are hunched and his chest is heaving with heavy breaths, it immediately puts me on edge. I'm snapped out of my thoughts by Leo. "Bella? What's wrong with dad? He looked so mad just now, I hope Connor's not in trouble." He says worriedly. I wan't to reassure him somehow but I can't seem to come up with any of the words that need to be said, so I simply say "I don't know.." My expression is tense and I know Leo can sense it but before he can say anything blood curdling screams echo across the village, without thinking I go full speed towards the direction it came from, almost completely forgetting my little brothers presence in the process.

I arrive at the village square and notice bodies littering the ground the stench of death, blood, and fear in the air. I can't help the bile that rises in my throat and lose most of my breakfast, wiping my mouth a familiar shout catches my attention 'I know that voice' I think as a listen carefully, then it hits me "Mother!" I yell and sprint in the voices direction, towards the woods.

"Mother!" I yell again as a break into a clearing I notice blood spattered along the ground and across the trees, the dread that's been forming since I heard the first scream solidifies, a sense of terror overwhelms me and I rush in the direction the blood leads. The next clearing I find is not naturally made, trees are torn up and strewn about, I notice even more blood, drawing closer to it. I can make out what looks like someone's head my stomach rebels violently as I walk over, I empty what little is left in my stomach and my heart seizes painfully in my chest as I recognize the head to be my father's.

"Dad?" I snap my head around quickly and make eye contact with my little brother. "No!" I shout, I rush over to him and cover his eyes, but the damage has been done. "Leo?" I call tentatively. He must be in shock because he makes no response and he goes limp in my arms, then I feel his tears and it takes all I have not to break down with him. I open my mouth to say something, anything at all but I can't speak past the lump that has formed in my throat, my vision blurs as the dam finally breaks and I can't stop the tears that flow endlessly down my face.

A branch snapping in the woods behind us snaps us out of the grief we've settled ourselves into. Pushing Leo behind me as we turn towards the noise, out steps my older brother Connor, I wan't to let my guard down but something inside of me is screaming at me to run, ignoring the feeling I open my mouth to address him, that's when he notices dad's head but instead of seeing horror or sorrow I see something that gives me pause. Connor has an expression of happiness and joy on his face as if he is proud of something, he turns back towards us and it changes to a disgusted sneer. Before I have a chance to call him out on it or question it his fist slams into my stomach, the blow is so powerful I cough up some blood.

"Bella!" Leo shouts and he runs to me. "No! Stay... back Leo. ...don't... come any closer!" I manage to get out in between gasps. Connor's face is blank completely empty of emotion. Quickly regaining the air in my lungs I stand. "What do you think your doing?!" He ignore's my shouts and moves to strike again but I'm prepared this time, dodging his strikes after a while he started noticing that he isn't connecting at all, the power behind his strikes start's to weaken but they pick up speed, some of the blows graze me but only just.

Even though I'm gaining more wounds as time goes on I can't bring myself to hurt him in any way, he takes notice of this and starts mocking me."Pathetic can't even defend yourself." I become slightly frustrated by that. "Why are you doing this?" I ask, he stops swinging at me and his sneer changes from one of disgust to amusement. "Where do you think all those bodies came from?" My mouth drops in disbelief, I start shaking my head no but he simply nods yes and start's laughing " Of course it was me dear one." At this statement something in me starts breaking, not noticing the change in me he swings again but this time instead of dodging I catch his fist, he swings his free one I catch that one too.

"Wha-" He gets cut off when I headbutt him he staggers and I kick him in the chest and he flies backwards. Quietly I whisper "Why?" He doesn't respond so I shout. "WHY?!" I'm shaking so much, energy is leaking out of me and it feels like I'm going to explode. So caught up in my inner turmoil I don't notice him moving until he's in front of me and by then it's far too late. Picking me up by the throat I struggle as he slowly cuts off my oxygen supply. Through darkening vision I can make out Connor rearing his free arm back to finish me off, squeezing my eyes shut I wait for the end.

A couple things happen at once, noticing the lack of pain and the hand around my neck loosening up I open my eyes. That;s when I notice Connor's face and it's one of shock, horror, sorrow, and regret. The final thing fill's me with anguish, Leo is impaled on Connor's arm the force of the blow that was meant for me made it pass through him, it's then I notice I'm covered in Leo's blood. Connor retracts his arm's quickly and Leo and I fall to the ground, I scramble to pick his limp body up in my arm's and cradle him to my chest rocking us back and forth.

"B..ella.." Leo gasps out struggling to breath. "It's so cold...I'm scared..pl..ease..make it...stop..." Crying hysterically I manage to speak only a few coherant words at a time."Leo...look at me lil bro.." I smile weakly. " your gonna be ok I can fix this don't worry your big sister's an adult now.." I joke weakly, he laughs and coughs up more blood. " But Bells...adults are boring..." He pouts, I laugh quietly. "Yeah, but you'll play with me right?" I get no response.

"Leo?" Silence is my only response.

"No! Don't do this! Don't leave me alone please!"

"Please..." The blood rushes to my ears and the only thing I can hear is the furious pounding of my own heart.

"No!.. NONONONONONONONOOOOO!" I start shouting hysterically.

The energy that's been building inside me explodes all I see is red before everything goes black.

When I awoke after blacking out I was in the ruins of what I assume was left of my families home. I had no clue what happened or how I got there but I had noticed my little brother Leo's pendant around my neck and it all came rushing back. I sat there for a while running through everything that's happened in my head, I decided to go and search and see what became of my family and the village not even ten feet from my home do I see makeshift graves that were never there before. I rush towards them and trip sliding to my knee's in front of them, one grave was etched with the name Deacon Rein, my father's name, and Leo Rein, my little brother. With tears pouring down my cheeks I realize that I saw no sign of mother nor did I see and sign of Connor. Rage fills me as I think of my older brother fleeing after all he has done. Unsure of what to do with myself I wander barely acknowledging any bodies I see , I can't let it end like this, I wan't justice for all the lives he has destroyed and the blood he has shed.

End Flashback

Quite a lot of time has passed since then, about 1,034 years 47 days, but whose counting right? I seem to be at a loss, I wonder if I should just give up on revenge all the time but I keep pushing forward searching or maybe more like wandering.

If I give up my revenge the question that scares me the most is, what do I do with all this anger and loneliness that has nowhere else to go?