Dumbledore was sitting in his large and comfortable recliner behind his desk in the headmaster's office in Hogwarts. On the desk before him was a large bowl almost completely empty, just five small lemon drops left.
Suddenly one of the many strange instruments that where placed around the room started to puff dark green smoke and emit a loud beeping noise. The headmaster stood up at the sound and was just about to leave the room to check what had happened on Godric's Hollow when he noticed that there were just a few candies left in the bowl. He got one out of the bowl and plopped it into his mouth.
Once again he was about to leave when the taste hit him and he sits down again on his recliner sighing blissfully. This repeats four more times and half an hour passed. When he finally got out of the office and was able to check up on the Potters someone had already been there and picked up Harry. Being as sure as he was that the secret-keeper was Sirius Black Dumbledore goes to the ministry of magic and reported the happenings as he thought it happened.
Meanwhile in a large house at number twelve Grimmauld Place a black haired young man, around 22 years old, sat in a couch leaning into his mother, who was holding her arms comfortingly around him, crying for his lost friends. On the floor crawled a baby boy playing with the resident house-elf named Kreacher.
Five years later…
A truce had been formed between Sirius and his mum; they had decided that they would not try to steer small Harry in any specific direction, neither saying that dark magic nor light magic was the best or that Dumbledore or Voldemort was the best.
They only told him about what the things did and meant and what the people did and thought and let Harry himself decide what to think of them.
Sirius and Walburga Black where talking about the schedule for what to teach Harry the next year when the boy in question peaked into the room.
Seeing that the two adults were occupied the boy swished his wand making a rainbow of colors shoot out of his wand towards the adults. As soon as the colours stopped Harry left the room at a run.
Walburga, Sirius' mum, was much quicker than one would have though to someone of her age and was out of the room chasing Harry even before Sirius got out of his seat.
When the two adults finally managed to track down the mischievous boy he was standing in front of a huge mirror covering the entire wall of the room he was in. Walburga was just about to start chastening the boy for using his wand when he should not when she saw herself in the mirror.
What she saw made her stumble three short steps back and her mouth to hang open, what she saw was her self, which is not in itself very strange to see in a mirror, but the other things she could see was what made her surprised. She saw herself having a pig's snout, an elephant's ears and her arms looked like the pincers of a lobster. She turned to see Sirius' reflection and started to laugh hard in mirth even despite her own strange shape.
Sirius looked like he had the legs of a poodle, his midriff and chest looked like and was clothed like that of a female belly dancer, his forehead a deer's antler in the centre and his nose where transformed into the backside of a hamster.
Sirius was choking in surprise for a long while before he could ask Harry in awe, "How in... ... How did you manage to do all these advanced transfiguration so fast, not to mention that we have not taught you any transfiguration yet?"
Sirius' mum seemed to want to know the answer to the same question so after smiling at the adults mysteriously for a while Harry answers. "I did not do any transfigurations..." He turned and tapped the mirror with his wand saying softly 'Finite Incantatem' "I just spelled the mirror to show your true selves!" He had to sit down on the floor because he was giggling so much.
Three years later...
Harry was sitting outside a room on the second sublevel where the walls where made of metal bars, making it look pretty much like a prison cell.
"Crucio" Harry said in a calm voice. His showed into an evil grin that after a while changed when he fell down to the floor in a fit of giggles. After composing himself again he points his wand at the same person again and repeats the spell.
After a while he stops pointing the spell at himself and stops it. He skips happily up from the basement feeling all tingly inside from the spell.
First of September 1991, Platform 9 ¾.
A short boy with black hair and green eyes entered the platform together with a mangy black dog and an old woman. They said goodbye to each other and the boy entered the train, sitting down in an empty compartment.
After a while a red headed boy opened the door and looked in, seeing only a boring black-haired boy reading a thick book inside he quickly left to find someone funnier to sit with. Just as the train is about to leave the station a girl came dragging on her school trunk, she looked into the compartment and seeing that there was only one person there she asked if she could join.
"Sure, come in." Harry picked out his wand and levitated the trunk up beside his own. He stretched out his hand and shock her hand. "My name is Harry Potter."
Hermione replied, "I'm Hermione Granger. Anyway, are you not supposed to have disappeared ten years ago, it says so in 'Great Wizarding Events of the Twentieth Century'"
"Can't I have disappeared and come back? Anyway, you should not believe everything that books tell you."
After that the two eleven year olds started to talk about all kinds of stuff, like discussing the usefulness/uselessness of some of the spells taught in Hogwarts (you should be able to guess who argued about what point.)
Some way into the trip a round faced boy opened the door and started to ask if they had seen a toad but stopped when he heard a quaking just behind his feet. He excused himself and tock the toad with him to go back to his own compartment.
When the train stopped Harry and Hermione left the train and followed the huge keeper of keys. From there the first years went to the boats and over the lake, into the underground cave and up to the Hogwarts gate. Soon the kids where walking in a line into the Great Hall to be sorted.
Some people where sorted before it becoming Harry's turn; almost the entire population of the Great Hall did one thing, they continued what they where doing, only some Ravenclaws and one or two of the rest of the tables looked curiously.
Harry walked calmly up to the stool, sat down and put the hat onto his head.
"Curious mind you got here, Mr. Potter. Let's see... Yes, I think that is the house to put you in. Here we go, Slythrindor!"
"What did you do, Mr. Potter? That went out wrong, Gryfferin!"
"Stop it, Potter! That should be Slythpuff!"
"Stop it Mr. Dumbledore! Argh... Stop it Snape! Argh!"
"What, Mr. Potter, do you want me to do before you stop changing what I am saying?"
For the first time since the sorting hat started Harry thinks something to the hat. "You could just have asked me nicely, you know. And please, sort me into Ravenclaw."
"Will it come out right this time? Ravenclaw!"
Harry walked calmly through the stunned silence and took a seat at the Ravenclaw table. The rest of the evening passed in a pretty normal fashion.
AN: I wrote this story as an oneshot, I will most likely not continue writing it.