-Voldemort must be pregnant
-the father of Voldemort's *ahem* baby must be of the human species.
-Ron cannot be gay. *YAY RON!!!!!*
-It must be funny
-someone has to say: "Aw, look at the little punum..."
-someone has to say: "My foot itches" (my foot does itch, thats what prompted
that..)
-straightjackets must be present
-It has to be more than 2 pages long. But that shouldn't be too hard.
and lastly,
-someone has to say: "Ha Kof Sheli Be'Esh" (which is Hebrew for "my monkey is
on fire" HAHAH!)
(Currently Untitled -- Any Suggestions?)
"Wormtail, bring me my wand." Voldemort stood doubled over a toilet in his hideaway. He choked, then vomited into it.
"Your wand, master." Peter hurried over to him, carrying the thirteen-and-a-half inch yew wand. "Master, per.. perhaps this was not the wisest choice," stammered Wormtail.
"Are you questioning me Wormtail?" Voldemort's eyes flicked in his direction. All of a sudden, Voldemort covered his mouth, and vomited into the toilet again.
"No, no of course not, ma-master, there are many women willing to have your heir!"
Recovering from his last wave of sickness, Voldemort hissed at Peter "how dare you doubt Lord Voldemort!" He raised his wand, eyes full of hatred. Peter put his hands over his face, leaning over.
"Master, forgive me!" He threw himself at his master's feet, and kissed the hems of Voldemort's robes.
"Get up rat, get me Thalia Stark!"
"Yes master," he said, getting up to leave. The stupid rat apparated, leaving Voldemort with his unborn child.
* * *
"Ugh!" Ron moaned. Hermione raised her eyebrow, looking up from her advanced Transfiguration text book. "Why me," he mumbled.
"Ron, its just a stupid dance, no one cares," Harry said, finally giving up on his divination homework.
"That's easy for you to say, you have a date!" Ron looked miserably around the room. The Fall Frolic Dance was on Saturday, and he was sure that there wasn't a single girl who didn't have a date. Even Ginny had one!
"Go with Hermione, you don't have another surprise date?" asked Harry.
Hermione turned pink. "No..."
"See, go with her..."
"I will not!" Hermione buried her face in her text book.
"Marry your book," Ron mumbled, storming out of the common room. He gave them both a desperate look, before disappearing into the boy's dormitory.
"Hermione..." Harry started. She poked her head above the book.
"Harry, I thought we could go together, but you asked Cho, and now I'm stuck."
Harry started at her. "Hermione, I thought... how shall I put this? Well, we're just friends!"
"I know, but Ron's gay, and he just doesn't know it yet, and it would be wrong to go with him, and..." Harry cut off her rambling.
"What! What do you mean Ron's gay? No he's not!"
"I thought... those robes he wore last year..." Harry doubled over laughing, shaking his head.
"Those were second hand, I made Fred and George buy him some new dress robes, he's not gay," Harry reassured her.
"Oh, do me a favor and let's pretend I never said anything, all right?" Harry nodded. "Tell Ron I'll go with him... actually, I'll go tell him myself."
Harry sarcastically gasped. "Hermione Granger, prefect, top of every class, going into the boys dormitory! I never thought I'd live to see the day..."
"Shut-up Potter." Hermione rolled her eyes, and turned a little rosy. The common room was clearing out, and she was sure none of the remaining students would report her for breaking such a big rule. None the less, Hermione darted up the staircase as quickly as she could, careful not to trip on her robes.
She knocked on the door. Surprised, Ron opened it, letting her in. Before he could speak, Hermione said "I know this is a boy's dormitory, but I need to talk to you." Ron stared at her blankly, then shrugged.
"What's up, Herm?" She seated herself on his four-poster bed (an exact replica of her own), then patted the seat next to her. Ron flopped into it.
"I heard you didn't have a date for the dance," she said, trying to put it into the simplest (yet effective) words she could.
Ron smirked. "Nope, you heard correct."
"I see..." Hermione looked at Ron's face. Her own face was only a foot away from it, and for the first time she saw a cute boy. Sure, she'd looked at him a million times, but never in a sexual way. He was slim and tall, well built...
"Why are you staring at me?" Hermione broke her gaze.
"Nothing, its just you've really grown." Ron turned bright red. He's really cute when he's embarrassed, Hermione thought.
"Um, thank you," Ron muttered. He glanced around the room, then accidentally met her eyes. Neither moved; they kept staring. Ron's eyes began to water. He wasn't sure why he did it, but he reached out and put his hands over Hermione's. She interlocked her fingers in his, leaning forward a little...
"Oh My GOD!" Ron quickly pulled back, Hermione jumping off the bed. Neville Longbottom, wearing night robes, stood at the door connection the dormitory to an adjacent boys toilet. He looked from Ron to Hermione, then gasped. "Sorry, I'll go," he said.
"Neville," Hermione started. He had gone back into the bathroom. She glanced at Ron, who was in total shock. "I better go," Hermione said. She ran out of the dormitory as fast as her legs would carry her.
* * *
Thalia Stark apperated to the location Peter had described. It was a small dark room, surrounded by shelves. The shelves held hundreds of bottles full of potions, some of which she recognized. "My lord," she called. She walked around the room, her long brown hair swishing behind her.
Voldemort stood at the bathroom door, rather pale. "You look well, my lord," Thalia lied.
"Liar," Voldemort's echoed through the room. "I want you to fix this!"
"Fix what, my lord?" Thalia was frightened.
"Fix what, my lord?" Voldemort mimicked, sarcastically. "This!" he screamed. The bottles shook, and he waved his wand dangerously close to her.
"My lord, it is not to late to transfer that baby to my womb, I would be honored to deliver it."
"My heir will come forth from my body, and my body only," Voldemort shouted, stubbornly. Thalia thought about the ridiculous operation she had performed on the man. She was a medi-wizard who worked for St. Mungo's Hospital. A few months ago, she decided that Voldemort's power was too great to resist, and she would rather join him than be killed by it. She did not like to consider herself a death eater; for she did not kill with her bear hands.
During the summer, Thalia had successfully transfigured Voldemort's sexual organs into a fully capable female reproductive system. Afterwards, he fertilized an egg with some of his own bottled sperm, taken before the transformation. He was now five months pregnant with the heir.
"My lord, morning sickness is a normal part of pregnancy. If you would allow me to transfer the baby, it would change no part of him..."
"Stark, I could have you killed with the snap of my finger. Lord Voldemort commands you to rid me of this sickness, now!"
"Very well, I will return shortly, I must look up a charm to help." She apparated before Voldemort could scream some more. It didn't really matter, because Voldemort had a sudden craving for watermelon and tuna.
* * *
"Hermione, what's wrong." Harry looked up from his divination homework (having decided to give it another go).
Out of breath from running, Hermione clutched a stitch in her side and lied. "Nothing," she gasped. After a few minutes, she finally caught her breath. "I'm going to sleep, goodnight Harry." She collected her (large) pile of books, stacked on her desk.
Harry narrowed his eyes. "So are you going to the dance with Ron?" he asked, suspiciously.
"I'm not sure," Hermione admitted.
"How can you not be sure?"
"I decided you can ask him for me," Hermione said, a finality in her voice. She stormed up the girl's staircase, disappearing into her own dorm.
Harry scratched his head. Weird, he thought.
* * *
Thalia apparated into her office in St. Mungo's. She picked a few volumes off her shelf, and began searching for spells to reverse morning sickness. There was a knock on her door. "Yes," she called.
"Dr. Stark?" A short, plump woman stuck her head into the door.
"Yes, yes, come in dear," Thalia said, closing the book. The woman walked in, then closed the door behind her. "Have a seat." The doctor motioned her into a desk chair, in front of her oak desk.
"I'm Molly Weasley," the woman said, putting out her hand for Dr. Stark to shake.
"What can I do for you, Molly?" Thalia was surprised how gentle she sounded. After all, she was a killer. I'm not a killer! I'm a healer, stop telling me I'm a killer. Yes you are, you helped create the next Voldemort! SHUTUP!
"Are you all right doctor?"
"Yes," Thalia said, forcing a smile. "Now, how may I help you, Ms. Weasley?"
"Mrs.," corrected Molly. Thalia nodded. "Well, er, you see..." Oh hurry up, woman, I have better things to do... "My husband and I, Arthur, we have seven children."
"Seven! That's incredible, how do you manage?"
"Its been difficult, but three of them are grown up already, but that's not my problem, doctor. You see, we didn't think we could have any more, I'm not so you, you see what I'm saying?" Thalia nodded, trying to sound concerned.
"So, you're pregnant, Mrs. Weasley?" Molly turned bright red and nodded. "And you don't want the baby," Thalia continued.
"Well, you see, its not that I don't want it, its just we can't keep it." Dear woman, there's other doctors who could easily rid you of your unwanted child, why'd you have to come see me? "I love children, honestly, I had seven!" Mrs. Weasley was rambling on. "I just can't handle another pregnancy, even though I practically wrote the book on how to cope with it."
Thalia shot up in her seat. "Would you happen to know anything about getting rid of morning sickness?"
"As a matter of fact, I know a useful little charm..."
* * *
"Ron?"
"Hmm?" Ron looked up from his comic, The Adventures of Martin Miggs, the Mad Muggle. "Did you say something, Neville?"
"Yes, you can't pretend I didn't see anything," he said, rather bravely (we're talking about Neville!).
"I can try," Ron said, flipping the page. "We were talking, all right."
"Uh... all right. Goodnight." Neville drew his curtains, and was snoring in a few minutes.
When Harry entered the dormitory, Ron was still sprawled out on his bed, reading the same magazine. "What was Hermione so fazed about?" he asked. Ron shrugged. "She wants to go to the dance with you," Harry said. Ron snorted, which Harry took as a 'yes.' "All right, I'll tell her tomorrow, goodnight," he called, stepping into the bathroom.
* * *
Thalia apparated back into Voldemort's hideaway, feeling pleased with herself. The Weasley woman turned out to be more useful than she'd bargained for. "My lord, I have the charm ready." Thalia could hardly keep herself from laughing at what she saw. Voldemort was eating canned pickles at an alarming rate.
He turned and gave Thalia Stark an evil look, while shoving another pickle in his mouth. She reckoned Voldemort was the only living sole (if that's what you could really call him) who could look evil while pigging out. Not to mention his enormous stomach, which made him look quite silly.
Finally calming down, Thalia trusted herself to speak without giggling. "My lord, I have a charm which will rid you of morning sickness at any time of the day (it was late evening)." Voldemort stood, eagerly awaiting her treatment. When she had completed the simple charm (which she had to admit was quite brilliant), she apparated back to the hospital.
Molly Weasley was waiting for her in her office. "I hope your important call went all right," she said gently.
"Yes, rather well, thanks to your charm." Molly blushed. "Are you ready?" Dr. Stark asked her. She nodded. "This way," she said, leading the plump woman into an examining room. "Would you like to know if it was a girl or boy?" The question seemed rather innocent, but Mrs. Weasley burst into tears.
"I have six boys," she explained. "All I ever wanted was a daughter, my baby Ginny is growing up so quickly." Thalia tried to comfort her. She promised herself to tell Mrs. Weasley that her unborn child would have been a boy.
* * *
Ron couldn't sleep. He played and replayed what had happened between him and Hermione in his head. I don't like her, he tried to tell himself. Hermione, the girl he'd loved to hate for four years stood out brightly in his mind. She wasn't beautiful, but she glowed in a way even a veela couldn't. She was intelligent. Intelligent was a huge understatement. Hermione was genius; she was the smartest person Ron knew. He loved her. I think I love her, there I said it!
* * *
The next morning, Ron entered the great hall with Harry. Hermione was already seated next to Ginny, reading the Daily Prophet. "Morning," Harry called. She glanced above the newspaper, smiling at them. Harry sat down across from Ginny, Ron across from Hermione.
"Ron, are you going to the dance with Hermione?" Ginny asked. She smirked, knowing how her brother would react. He silently tried to kick her under the table, feeling his face turn crimson. Instead, he kicked Hermione's knee, and she yelped. Harry watched, not even bothering to hold back laughter.
"Yes, I'm going with Hermione," Ron's eyes pierced Ginny's and she slouched in her seat. "Who are you going with?"
Ginny's face turned red, matching her brother's remarkably well. "Colin Creevy," she stammered.
"Are you two starting a Harry Potter fan club?"
"Leave me out of this, Ron," Harry said, between mouthfuls of hot cereal.
"Let's just drop it," Hermione said, finally voicing her opinion. "You guys love each other, stop fighting," she added.
"Ron loves you," Ginny squealed, running from the table in the process. Ron leapt up, toppling over a glass of orange juice. Ignoring it, he ran after his sister. Hermione sighed, whipped out her wand and summoned the juice back into the cup.
Fred and George Weasley were the next to seat themselves at the table. They took their siblings' places, pushed their plates out of the way, and smirked at Hermione. "So, we here your dating out little brother," George said (let's just say they're sweaters had their names on them).
"Eh, I'm going to the dance with him, if that's what you mean," she told them.
"We're very protective of our only little brother," Fred said. Hermione looked from one to the other, clueless. "Yes, you'll have to pass a Weasley Worthy Test to date Ron."
"A what what?" Hermione choked.
"A Weasley Worthy Test, WWT. Many have died taking it." Hermione seriously hoped that last bit was made up.
"Er..." she said.
"Just kidding," George said, completely changing his voice. "Welcome to the family, Fred said. They both hugged Hermione. She still looked puzzled. "We were just worried, we thought Ron was gay."
"Ron... gay?" Hermione chuckled. I wonder where they got that idea?
"Who's gay?" Ron and Ginny came (panting) over to the table.
"Well no one," Fred said innocently. "Nope," George said.
"Ok then," Ron said, suspiciously. "Those are our seats."
Fred and George got up politely... almost too politely. "I'll be watching you," Fred whispered into Hermione's ear. She turned rosy pink.
"Hey!" Ron called after him. "What did he say to you?" he asked, turning back to Hermione.
"Nothing," she replied. Obviously not.
* * *
Molly Weasley woke with a start. "My baby," she whispered. Tears rolled down her chubby cheeks, falling onto her husband's shoulder. He stirred, then opened his eyes.
"There, there, Molly," he kissed her cheek.
"Oh Arthur!" She buried her head in his chest, whaling. "It was so unfair for the child, even if he was a boy. We're so selfish!"
"Molly, honey, we have seven beautiful children, they're not perfect, but we did the best we could. We can't afford another one, not to mention you can't handle another pregnancy."
"We could have managed, Arthur, somehow." Molly lay silently crying in her husbands arms, falling asleep again. All she could think of was wanting another child. Already, three were all grown up. Fred and George were leaving Hogwarts this year, which only left her babies, Ron and Ginny. She wanted another baby.
* * *
Harry pulled his old dress robes over his head, five minutes before he had to be in the great hall. He hardly gave himself a look-over in the mirror, before running out of the dormitory. Ron, who's date was waiting for him in the common room, took more time to admire his work.
He wore long navy blue dress robes. There were no lacy things on it, anywhere. He danced in front of the mirror until Dean Thomas came in, laughing his head off. Deciding it was best to go, Ron headed down the dormitory steps, and was almost blown away by Hermione.
If she'd been beautiful for the Yule Ball, it was nothing compared to the way she looked now. She wore long, elegant violet dress robes and beautiful matching slippers. Her hair was done up in a perfect perm, held up by little clips (Ron suspected the whole thing was actually magically held up), but was awed none the less. There wasn't an once of makeup on her face, but it glowed.
"Wow," Ron whispered. Hermione walked over to him, her robes swishing behind her. She smiled gently at him, which nearly made Ron's knees buckled. "Hello," he said stupidly. But for once, Ron wasn't worried what she thought of him. He had on decent robes, and he felt that Hermione knew him too well to expect much less than idiotic comments like hello.
"Hello," she smiled. "We're going to be late." Hermione took his hand, which felt extremely soft in his own. He bowed awkwardly at her, and they set off for the great hall together.
Harry was already there, standing with his date, Cho Chang. Cho was beautiful, but Ron had no trouble keeping his eyes on his own date. In fact, he couldn't keep them off of her. They danced.
Twenty minutes later, exhausted, Ron and Hermione collapsed in a chair. They'd been dancing the entire time, never stopping to rest. Despite their height difference, they were the life of the party. They were having the time of their lives.
A slow song came on, and Hermione stood, eyeing her partner to follow. He stood, taking her hand, this time leading her onto the floor. Hermione wrapped her arms around his neck (which was quite high), and Ron wrapped his arms around her waist. They twirled around to the beat of the music, swaying their hips, not really noticing that they were being stared at.
When the song ended, Ron leaned down and pecked Hermione on the cheek. Immediately, he his face grew hot. He really is cute when he's like that, Hermione sighed. "What was that for," she whispered, so passing couples wouldn't here her.
"I'm not sure," he replied.
"I liked it," she whispered back.
"Me too." Hermione wasn't sure how much more the boy could take. As it was, he looked like a red balloon. "Do you want to go for a walk?" Ron suggested.
Hermione nodded. She lead him out of the busy hall, unnoticed. Neither spoke until they'd reached the fat lady, having decided to go back to Gryffindor Tower, rather than be caught roaming the school by Filch.
The Fat lady rolled her eyes at them, then opened the door. "After you," Ron gestured, helping Hermione climb into the hole. Her bare leg showed for a moment, as she stepped over it, and Ron was transfixed on her smooth skin. He reminded himself that it was probably a charm, but none the less, he was awed by her skillfulness.
"Ron?"
"Hmm," Ron said. He realized she was staring at him, and he was staring at her bottom. "Sorry..." Hermione giggled.
"Common," she said, helping him into the room. "Let's go up to your dormitory, everyone's at the ball," she whispered. The whispering only added effect, for there was no one in the huge common room. Ron nodded weakly, wondering if his feet would carry him that far.
Somehow they did, because Ron found himself and Hermione in his dormitory. They were still standing, somewhat awkwardly. "Ouch," Hermione said, pulling up her foot.
"What, I didn't step on your toes or something?"
"No... my foot itches" She kicked off her slipper, revealing five perfectly polished toes, and a beautiful silky foot (magic, again). Trying to balance herself, Hermione rested her foot on the top of Ron's right leg. She leaned forward then scratched her foot. As she was leaning, Ron got a full view of her cleavage. It had never looked so large, which lead him to believe she'd enhanced it, but this didn't bother him the slightest bit.
"Ahh!" Hermione slipped, losing her balanced. She grabbed onto Ron's arms, and her foot slipped down his robes. As it did, she felt something large and hard under her toes. Ron felt it too.
After a minute, she looked at his face. It was by far the reddest she'd ever seen it before. She felt her own cheeks growing hot. "Ha Kof Sheli Be'Esh," he mumbled.
"What was that," Hermione asked.
He repeated it, "Ha Kof Sheli Be'Esh."
"I heard it the first time, is that," she scratched her head, "is that Hebrew?" He nodded. "What's it mean?"
"Bill made it up, its a Weasley code." Hermione still looked puzzled. Ron turned away from her, "it means my monkey is on fire."
Hermione burst out laughing. "It sure is," she grinned." Ron forced a smile, glowing. Hermione glanced down at his robes. There was a huge lump between his legs, which was noticeable from a mile away. "Sit down," Hermione motioned him onto his bed.
She gingerly removed her slippers and crossed her legs (making sure he couldn't see her underwear; she could see him trying). "Ron, this stuff is all enhancing charms I looked up, I don't want you to think I'm really like this."
"Hermione, I've seen you when your not like this, of course I know they're spells. Your beautiful either way." Ron wasn't sure how he'd managed to speak such truth. Normally, he was clumsy and stupid around girls he liked. "I realized how much I like you, you know the night you came in here..."
"I like you too," Hermione whispered. She leaned in, this time kissing him gently on the lips. When she pulled away, she asked, "did you like that?" he nodded, stupidly. She kissed him again, lettering his tongue enter her mouth. She wrapper her arms around his neck, pulling him close to her.
* * *
"Harry," Cho called. He was dragging her all over the hall, looking for his friends. "Harry, I bet they left to talk or something." Or something, that's what worried him.
"I'm sorry Cho, I was just worried." She looked down into his green eyes (she was taller than him), which made him calm down.
"Let's go dance," said Cho, soothingly. Harry nodded. Halfway through their slow dance, two boys came loudly into the hall, causing most of the couples to stop dancing. They made their way over to the center of the dance floor.
"Have no fear..."
"Fred and George are here!" The hall laughed. Harry searched his mind, trying to remember where the line was from. Oh well.
Fred and George Weasley stood side by side, wearing identical rouge grins and (gasp) straightjackets. Murmurs broke out in the hall; many of the students had never seen a straightjacket in their life.
"Its our last year here," George (let's just say he's George) told the entire hall. No one was dancing anymore, they were waiting to see what the Weasley twins were going to do.
"Yeah, and we're gonna go out with a bang," Fred said.
"BANG," said George. He raised their wands and shouted an unfamiliar spell. At the same time, Fred cast a smoke spell, filling the hall with mist. No one realized what had happened until the smoke cleared.
Everyone's dress robes were inside out, and their underwear was on top of them! students were shouting and running in every direction.
"WEASLEY!" Professor McGonagall came running across the chaotic dance floor. She grabbed Fred and George by the ears, pulling them out of the hall, most likely to Dumbeldore's office.
Had Harry's boxer shorts not been ontop of his robes, he might have laughed. He stared at Cho, who had green panties. She tried to cover them with her hands. "Harry, stop looking at me like that," she said.
"Sorry. I guess I'll see you tomorrow," he called, leaving. Harry ran as quickly as he could up to Gryffindor tower. Even if the dance hadn't been canceled, it was nearly over. Wanting to get to the dormitory before the others, he leaped up the stairs, two at a time.
Harry flung open the door, and what he saw almost blinded him. There, on Ron's bed were two bodies, rolling around. "Ron?" Ron sat up, looked at Harry, horrified. Hermione ducked her head in Ron's chest, but Harry could tell it was her. "Hermione?" She slowly turned, and met his gaze. Harry clasped his hand over his mouth.
They both stared at Harry. Why is are his robes inside out, and why is he wearing boxer shorts ontop of them? Hermione didn't blink. Shut-up, he just caught his two best friends making out, and all you can think about is his underwear.
Ron didn't trust himself to speak. His face burned with shame. Why am I shameful? We really didn't do anything wrong... Harry backed out of the room. "I'll come back when Hermione leaves," he said, then closed the door.
* * *
Molly Weasley spent three months writing her book. She had been inspired by Dr. Stark, who had praised her morning sickness charm. The book was the story of her own six pregnancies. Although in story form, it could also be considered a handbook. She shared her useful spells and potions, as well as tips for raising large families.
When the publishers met with Molly, she was nervous. They helped her edit, then published her book. By mid-March, Mrs. Weasley's Guide to Pregnancy was a complete success. The book was selling as well as Lockhart books had a couple years ago. Molly even won the Amazing Witch of the Month award. The Daily Prophet gave her such praises as "The next big Lockhart." Of course, Lockhart had disappeared; few knew that he was a fake. By April, the Weasley's never had to worry about money again.
* * *
Thalia Stark wasn't sure how she'd gotten Voldemort through his pregnancy in one piece. She used Mrs. Weasley's book, which helped a lot, but his mood swings were unbearable. The child was due any day, and Thalia was forced to take a week's "holiday" to aid her lord.
Voldemort lay, legs open on a hospital bed in his hideaway. His water had broken, and was having regular contractions. "Breathe," Thalia soothed him.
"Don't tell me to breath, damn woman!" Voldemort tried to sit up, but the weight of his baby was too great. Thalia frantically flipped through Mrs. Weasley's Guide to Pregnancy, looking for something to ease labor pains.
"Ah," she sighed, then ran to find the ingredients for the potion. She returned a few minutes later, giving Voldemort the goblet. "Drink this, my lord, it will help." Voldemort put the drink to his lips, then gulped it down in one go. He dropped the goblet, and it crashed on the stone ground.
* * *
"Ron," Hermione moaned. He looked up. "Why do you have to go home for the Easter holidays? I'm gonna miss you!"
"Hermione, we've been over this. My mum and dad have something important to announce, I didn't have a choice." She gave him the puppy dog eyes. "I'll miss you too," he added. She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I'll write you everyday," he promised.
"Ok, goodnight," she said, going up to her dorm. Hermione and Ron had been an official couple for several months. Harry was used to their closeness; it no longer bothered him.
The next morning, Harry helped Ron carry his trunk down the steps. Hermione was waiting for them in the common room. She dragged Ron away to say their good-byes, leaving Harry to carry the heavy trunk by himself. "He'll be back next week!" Harry said, hoping to get a response. He did get one, but not one he'd expected. Ron, who was kissing Hermione, stuck up his wand, and started blasting sparks out the end. "All right, all right, sheesh," Harry mumbled..
* * *
Thalia wrapped the child in a blanket. After twenty hours of labor, it had finally entered the world. She felt bad for it, its mother and father were one and the same, and he was pure evil. "My lord, your child," she presented it to him. Voldemort grabbed the baby, who started whaling. "Be gentle," Thalia screamed. He disregarded her.
"Its a... a girl!" Voldemort stuttered. "I will not have it, dispose of it!"
"My lord, you always assumed that it would be a boy, there was an equal chance for a girl."
"Wormtail!" Voldemort shouted. Thalia didn't wait for the rat-death eater to come. She grabbed the baby and apparated back to St. Mungo's.
* * *
Ron, Ginny, Fred and George Weasley sat together on the Hogwarts Express. They were minutes from Kings Cross station, and still couldn't figure out why they'd been called home. As the train slowed to a stop, Ginny suggested the best answer yet. "Its got to have something to do with the book," she said.
"Probably," Ron said. He was gazing out the window, thinking about Hermione.
"Ah, Ron, snap out of it," George said. "Mum's gonna notice your in love," he added.
"I'm not in love, what are you talking about?" Ron looked at his three siblings. They all nodded and smirked. "Ok, so maybe I am..."
"Kings cross!" someone shouted. They unloaded their trunks and made their way onto the platform. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, as well as Bill, Charlie and Percy were all waiting for them in the station.
Percy was complaining. "Just because its Easter, doesn't mean I can just take a week off. I have loads to do in the ministry..."
"Shut-up, Perc," Charlie said. Bill nodded his head in agreement.
"Mum," Ginny squealed. Mrs. Weasley threw her arms around her baby.
"Is that Molly Weasley," someone shouted. They all looked up. It was a Daily Prophet reporter. "This must be your entire family," the woman said, counting the children. "Le'me have a photo, could be front page material." So they all turned and waved at the camera, which took several minutes, because the photographer wanted to take several photos.
When the reporters had finally left, Molly said she had an announcement. "Are we moving," Fred suggested, hopefully.
"No, although we're going to add more extensions to the house, but that's not my announcement," Molly said, getting slightly frustrated.
"What is it, mum?" Percy asked, having finally stopped complaining about leaving the ministry.
"If you'd let me get to it!" Molly looked at her children's eyes. They brought warmth back into her own. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell." Arthur placed his arms on his wife's shoulders.
"See what your mother is trying to say is, is we want to adapt a baby."
"A what!" came seven voices.
Ignoring them, Molly spoke. "We're going to St. Mungo's right now, we're going to take home a baby." Ginny was the only excited one. Molly's son's looked horrified, especially the older ones, who remembered watching after their younger siblings, especially the twins.
Arthur pulled out an old muggle alarm clock. "This is a port key, its set for 6:00, we have ten minutes. Molly, you go now. Billy, Charley and Percy will apparate there in a few minutes." Molly nodded, then disappeared. "Apparate to the Natal wing in St. Mungo's." The older boys nodded, then left.
"Dad, why don't we use floo powder?" Ginny asked. She didn't like port keys.
"We could, but there's no chimneys here."
"What about our trunks?" Ron asked.
"We'll pick them up on the way home," Mr. Weasley replied. He glanced down at the clock. "All right, touch the clock," he instructed them. The alarm began ringing, and they disappeared.
* * *
Mrs. Weasley was examining babies in the nursery. There were only three babies up for adoption. "Why don't we just get a dog," Fred suggested.
"Be quiet, Fred," Molly snapped. The nurses were looking on curiously. They swore by Mrs. Weasley's book, and were surprised that she was adopting. Two of the babies were boys, quite beautiful, but Ron knew his mother had her heart set on another girl (she complained about her numerous son in her book).
Molly expertly lifted the girl out of her crib. She had thick, dark hair and black eyes. Very un-Weasley looking, but none the less, Molly fell in love with her. She sang a lullaby softly, causing the baby to fall asleep in her arms. The entire Weasley clan crowded around her, looking at their new baby sister.
"Aw, look at the little punum..." George joked. Ginny shot him a death glance. "Sorry Gin."
* * *
After the paper work had been filled out, and the Weasley's had left, Thalia Stark collapsed in her chair. She had just given Lord Voldemort's child to them. She didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore, but knew that running from him would mean certain death. What could she do? Thalia thought long and hard. She had to do it, she was going to see Dumbeldore...
Ok, here's the thing. When I started this, I didn't really think about making it a series, just making a funny, short story (actually I'm up to page 16, so its not really that short). I'm working on another series called the Hogwarts Four, so it'll be hard to write both at the same time. (this is the site for The Hogwarts Four: http://mypage.goplay.com/hpfanfic/ ) So, if you liked this story, plesase tell me, otherwise I'm gonna drop it. Thanks to METMA Mandy for sending the challenge. Check out her work, its really good. ~Juliette