Hey, everyone! So, this is a story my friend, Shay, and I wrote through text. We're still writing it, but she ran out of texts for this month for the month. Sorry, Shay Nay Nay! This is not a good story for serious people, and it isn't like my other story (Annabeth's Quest For Percy), because that one is only by me, and it's much more... serious, if you will. This is purely a joke that will brighten your day, and please, if you comment, I don't want any 'That's so wrong!' crap, because I warned you. What happened, is that the international translators changed what happened in The Last Olympian, thus they totally screwed up CHB. Shay and I have to save the day. Now, please read. If you have any questions, review or PM me.
And then, as Luke stood atop the grassy green hills of Camp Half Blood, his body silhouetted by the setting sun's rays, Percy thought, Crap, he's hot. Too bad I'm with Grover. Then, Luke turned around, his gorgeous golden eyes sparkling like a Drachma, and walked up to Percy, and said, "Hey," as he applied hot pink lip stick to his gull, smexy lips. Percy suddenly felt very self conscious of himself. OMG, what was he wearing? Sooo last month. Luke popped a piece of gum with his gorgeous pink lips and put his hands on his lips. Percy shook his head. No… He was with Grover. But then, he couldn't help but stare at the smexy hot blonde in the pink, bedazzled shirt. Right when Percy was thinking, Does Grover have to know about this?, Grover came trotting down Half Blood Hill, his fur all glossy and smelling like lemons. "What's up, Perciebaby?" In that sweet voice of his. Percy was so confused, the two most gorgeous boys in the world were right in front of him! What should he do?
luke rolled his eyes impatiently, as if waiting for Percy to choose. Before he could about which smexy boy to choose, Grover gasped. "Percy?" He cried. Percy waved his hands.
"This isn't what it looks like!" Grover plucked a leaf from Juniper (Who'd been watching the scene unfold with undivided attention), blew his nose, and stuck it back on her face.
"I…I…I thought you CARED about me, baby! I gave you my heart, I even violated the camp's no Satyr/Camper relationships rules… for YOU!" Grover sobbed, looking at Luke. "But what am I, compared to those beautiful, smexy, pink lips, golden eyes, blond hair… he even wears Bath and Body Works 'Magical Unicorn' perfume."
Luke shrugged. "It is true… I am drop dead gorgeous." He looked at Grover sympathetically. "It's a curse and a gift." Grover sobbed some more, while luke patted his back, saying things like, "I know, I know, I'm too smexy for most people… It's okay…" And then, when Percy thought it couldn't get any worse, Chiron came over, and dropped a huge drama bomb.
"Chiron!" They all shouted, "We're trying to figure out Percy's love life!" Luke said.
"Why don't you do a triangle, like Annabeth, Rachel, and Piper have?" Chiron asked reasonably. Grover warmed up to that idea immediately. He batted his eyelashes, which he'd recently had extended to two inches long, at Luke, then Percy, and making his gorgeous chocolate pools of eyes go all big and smexy.
"I don't know…" Luke considered.
"Oh, come on!" Grover whined. "You can't keep Percy to yourself!" Luke scoffed and snapped his fingers in a Z formation.
"Oh, but honey, I think I can." Chiron sighed loudly, and grabbed Grover before he could scratch Luke's eye out.
"Come on, boys. Let's go see Rannaper." Ugh, Percy thought. He had to admit that he had liked her before… Grover. Chiron led the boys up the hill, and they saw Rannaper. They were skipping aground the hill, holding hands. None of them were wearing makeup, unlike Puke and Grover. Luke looked at Percy and his eyes said two things: 1) Love you forever, 2) Please help me! Girls are… Percy nodded, understandingly. He'd need to be careful, bromances were delicate, beautiful things, not unlike Luke himself.
When the girls caught sight of them, they all made puking sounds. "Uck! Luke, pink is not your color, you're a fall, we've gone over this!" Piper protested. Luke gave her 'The Hand,' and Annabeth growled at him.
"Boys! Please, be polite!" she insisted, giving the girls a warm smile.
"Rannaper, we need some help organizing a love triangle," Percy said. The girls beamed.
"I'll get the markers!" Rachel called. Piper looked at her in disgust.
"Girlfriend, please! Those markers are mine!" Annabeth sighed as the two other corners of her triangle went for each other's hair. She went over to talk to Percy, and right before she got a chance, he said,
"Gurrlllll, I would say, 'You looking' fine,' but I mean, look. At. Me. And plus, I see what you're doin'! Sneaking up on me like dat, hopin' to get some of this."
"That's not it!" Annabeth said, blushing, "I just… wanted to say, you, uh, drool when you sleep!"
"Oh, no, you di'n't," Luke said, shaking his beautiful blond hair.
"You did NOT just talk to my Honey Boo Boo child like that!" Luke screamed. Rachel snapped her fingers in a T motion.
"Oh, honey, but I think he did," she smirked. Luke's perfect nostrils flared.
"Oh, it's on!" he yelled, flinging himself at her. Grover, not wanting to get left out of the cat fight, lunged himself at Piper, going for the hair.
"Piper, baby," said Percy in a mock-sweet voice, "your hair… it's tangled." The girls screamed in rage. Luke was really angry now.
"Ooh… Don't make me snap in Z formation, exclamation, butt rotation, elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist, ooh, you just got dissed!" Luke sassed, doing all the hand motions to go along, making Percy's heart flutter.
"Oh, no you did NOT!" Rachel shrieked. "You…you…you DUMB BLONDE!" Everyone gasped, including Chiron. Never had anyone ever dared to use such bold language in the presence of not one, but two blondes. Luke's face turned beat red as he attempted to breathe. Annabeth stood with her arms crossed in mock triumph. Percy backed away. CRAP WAS GOING DOWN AT CAMP HALF BLOOD.
Was it funny? Make you laugh? I hope it did:) Oh, Shay and I come in in the next chapter. Again, please no hate comments, because I did tell you that the only reason it's up here is to make people laugh!