The Post Office Incident
Disclaimer: I don't own any thing in this fic I just hope to give you a few laughs, aren't I a saint? Any who just an idea.
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The day started just like any other for Duo. Getting up and having a cold cup of coffee, (the coffee to wake him up, and the coldness to neutralize the caffeine) so the coffee didn't do much good for him anyways. He then went to the cupboard to get his favorite cereal (Lucky Charms) but it looked like his roommate (Heero) had eaten them all, probably psychotically at five in the morning, right before he would go to his room and hack for the rest of the day. Any ways Duo looked in the far reaches of the cupboard, the only cereal that he found was Kellogg's corn flakes. Duo almost like them after he put five pounds of sugar on them, so he got them out and poured a huge bowl that was overflowing with the corn flakes, he went to the cupboard and looked for the sugar. He then remembered what Heero had done the day before, since Heero had been on lack of sleep he needed extra energy, sooooo he put about half a jar of sugar into his coffee, (which took up most of the coffee, and made it syrupy), and he did that about ever five minutes so he was pretty hyped up for the rest of the day. So Duo the lucky guy got to eat plain corn flakes, (bleck).
Duo who was now having a terrible day, decided to get out of the house to buy some sugar to cheer him up, and to get the mail, because he was waiting for his special Gundam Wing fan club admit ion slip with yours truly face all over the stuff (for the slow people out there Duo's face is all over it), since Duo is his favorite pilot he put himself on the Put me on the Duo everything list.
Since Duo had very little sugar that morning he decided to go to the store first and get high sugar candy and just plain old sugar in a bag. He got to the store and got about twenty of each kind of candy. He then went down the sugar/baking isle and looked for his favorite kind of sugar. His favorite kind was Gundanium Alloy Sugar. He looked at the spot where the sugar usually is but it wasn't there. Duo went into a panic, he started to pace up and down the isles looking to see if they put it somewhere else in the isle, but to his dismay they didn't have any anywhere. Duo ran up to the counter where a lady with overly long painted red finger nails was reading a magazine that was full of those corny fake adds. Duo started talking surprisingly fast, considering that he hadn't had any sugar that morning, the lady lazily looked at him over the magazine, she then said in a very nasty raspy voice, "sorry little boy we got ride of that kind, it wasn't selling because it was the crummiest kind on the shelf." That made Duo go into almost a blind rage but he was amazingly able to control himself, to get back at the lady he got about fifty more candy bars then got into line. He signaled to the lady who again looked at him then at his cart. She looked stunned that he was asking him to make her work. But she lazily started to ring them up. It took the lady approximately 10 min., 27 sec. to ring them all up. When she was done she looked quite annoyed. Duo looked in his pockets for some money, he felt some bills and pulled them out, he handed them to the lady without looking at them.
Duo remembered that he had pulled a hundred bucks out of the bank the other day. The lady looked at him stunned then said, "sorry little boy but this wont be enough for all of this." Duo looked at the money on the counter, he then remembered that he had gone to Disney world and spent most of his money on souvenirs. He slowly looked at the bills on the counter, there were two George Washington looking up at him with those green eyes. Duo looked back in horror. The lady was fed up with him, she told him to put all of the candy bars back except for the ones he could afford, or else she would call the police. Duo was now having a horrible day and did not want to make it worse with the police being involved. He shoved the candy bars back into place and it took him 20 min and 7 seconds to do them all. He then picked out his favorite candy bars and went back to the counter. The lady ringed them up and got the money from Duo and hurriedly gave them to him.
Duo grumpily walked out of the store and headed to the post office. He got there and put the almost melted candy bars on the seat. Duo got out and went into the post office; he then remembered that he forgot his keys at home. He started to get a temper again but then remembered that he had his secret weapon with him. He reached into his hair and pulled out many things including these: automatic lock opener, lock buster, a gun, a bazooka, chainsaw, and a Twinkie that he had had in his hair for over a week and forgot about. He finally found what he was looking for a bobby pin. He went to P.O. Box # 3487 and undid it. He reached in and took out the mail. He looked at the mail all addressed to some person named Jim and Anita Carver. "Hum here is one addressed to someone named Melissa Carver from Bonnie how weird. Probably just some dorks somewhere else." Duo just realized that he had gotten the wrong box, and he just remembered that he didn't remember the number of his box. He then decided to lock the doors and go through every box. He started to unlock the box one by one and it took about five minutes for each box. He had finished his tenth box when he looked all the way down the hall at the boxes that he had not opened. He then spent the next ten days opening the boxes. He finally got down to the last box, box number 1987. He was about to collapse from exhaustion and from extreme lack of sugar. He toppled over sideways and dropped the bobby pin. He sat bolt strait up, the bobby pin was lost. He started to go crazy and then noticed out side that the cops were there.
He stood up and went out side looking defeated. Heero was they're looking extremely hyped up. He had another bag of Gundanium Alloy Sugar. Duo started to run to it. But right as he was running Heero dumped the last of it into the coffee and drank it right in front of Duo's face. Heero then picked up Duo's two candy bars and ate them while Duo was looking at him and being dragged away at the same time by the police. Duo was dragged away to jail for two days and then Heero finally came in and paid the fine. Duo was actually extremely sad and angry and a tinge bit happy at the same time. He was sad and mad because he didn't get his mail or sugar, and had had a terrible day, and that it had taken Heero two days to realize that his best friend forgot that he was in jail. Personally Duo though that Heero had forgotten about him to let a someone into the house for a couple of days but he couldn't think like that that was just nasty. And he was a tinge bit happy because Heero had learned the happiness of sugar, and Duo was also happy that Heero had stopped eating his new and improved Gundanium Alloy Sugar.
Well how was it please review if you don't you are a Rotting Pile Of Vomitus Mass. I don't care what kind of review it is.