Everything Happens for a Reason II: "Stupid Cupid"

(working title)

Prelude

St. Patrick's Day and Cupid led Daria and Jane to the back of the Holiday Island Good Time Chinese Restaurant. It was time to say goodbye.

"I thank you kindly," said St. Patrick's Day gratefully. "You've saved the holidays."

"All in a day's work," said Daria.

"And if there's anything I can do for you…once you've reached the legal drinking age, that is…let me know." He winked.

Daria highly doubted she would ever call for his help, but maybe there was something they could do for her. "What about my parents? Could you at least recommend a doctor?"

"No need, dude. They'll be back to normal by the time you get home," Cupid assured her.

"Good. One little sister is enough," Daria sighed.

"And if there's anything I can do for you---"

"Hey, you keep that gun of yours away from me." She backed away.

"Aw, come on, Daria," teased Jane. "You could use a good 'zap'."

"Yeah, I play matchmaker for everybody, and that includes you," said Cupid.

"He's right, lassie," said Pat. "Nearly everyone is helped by Cupid at some point."

"And if everyone jumped off a building, should I do it too?" Daria said dryly.

"Depends on how soft the pile of bodies underneath it is," said Jane. "Anyway, St. Val, feel free to mess with my love life. You'll probably do a better job than I'm doing now, anyway."

"Thanks, Jane. And please, call me Cupid." He grinned. "How about you, Daria?"

"Fine, go ahead," said Daria, shaking her head. She was getting sick of talking about it, and figured that the sooner she ended the argument, the sooner she'd wake up from this crazy dream. "Hit me with your best shot."

"Can do," Cupid said smiling.

"We'd better go, ladies," said St. Patrick's Day. "Class starts in about 12 minutes. Do you need any help getting back?"

"Nah, we know the way. Through the hole in the back of the Chinese place, into the interdimensional wormhole and out the other end…. We get it," said Jane.

"Kay, then. Good luck, dudettes! See you soon!" Cupid waved as he and Pat walked away.

"I'd better wake up soon," Daria told Jane, as the both of them prepared to crawl through the wormhole. "I'm sick of this."

"Yeah," Jane said. "I mean, this has been interesting and all, but I'd like to get back to my dreams about Tom Cruise, thank you very much."

"Mm, didn't need to know that."

"Hey, you're just DreamDaria. Why should I care what you think?"

"Actually, I think I'm the one dreaming here."

"Sure you are. Tell you what, can we discuss this after we get home? I kinda want to go back through the rabbit hole and leave Wonderland while we still can."

"Sounds good to me. And Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"Never, ever let me eat Chinese food out of your fridge again."

"Got it."