based on: www. youtube .com/ watch?v=ziSrv7gico4

Sasuke was so happy to finally be home again. In his own comfy Uchiha bed, in his cozy Uchiha bedroom, in his Uchiha fortress of solitude just for him. No creepy Kabuto and Orochimaru, no creepy Karin. Alone at last.

He cuddled the blankets closer to himself as he drifted off into a warm, fuzzy, silent dreamland...

Only to be brought back to the waking world by some infernal noise.

"oooooOOOOOOOooooooooUUUUUUuuuu..."

Sasuke snapped back to consciousness and shifted his head to see what was going on.

"AAAHHHH!"

Hovering right at the foot of his bed was a floating, translucent, wailing, moaning, horrible....

teenage girl?

Unknown to Sasuke, this was one of his deranged fangirls killed in that mob when he returned to the village a few weeks ago.

The sasuke fangirl stopped wailing.

Sasuke paused.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked, eyes still partially squinted shut, protesting the sudden awakening.

"ah, I dunno." She replied, sort of spaced out.

"Ugh.." Sasuke rubbed his eyes and sat up. "Why'd you do that?"

The fangirl was still spaced out. "uh, look, I'm...I'm really sorry."

"Yeah, you should be sorry." Sasuke retorted.

"Aw, you were just snug as a bug in a rug in there until I came along and spooked 'ya. Look, maybe I should just go."

"Yeah, cha, get outta here."

"Well, just, I feel really really bad now, man. Is there anything I can get you, or, you need me to get you a cup of water, or, a little sippy-sippy?"

Sasuke sighed and shook his head. Now this was getting weird. "Oh, my god...No thanks." he mumbled tiredly.

"Or I could give you a foot rub," the ghost continued. "Put my finders on your feet, you know I've been trained..."

"Just, can ya just go..I'm just..."

"Okay, i'll just...I'm gonna go, then. Okay." The phantom turned around to phase through the wall, but stopped and turned around again when she saw the door. "Oh... Oh, OOOH jeez. Is thi-is this frosted glaaaaass?" she moaned

"Yeah, it's...That's the door."

"OOOh, oh gosh I can't walk through frosted glaaaaass."

"What can you walk through?"

"uh, I dunno know, like, you know a screen door? Like if it's already... a little bit ajar? So i could kinda like scoot-ch through? Or like a pool, I could definitely walk through a pool you know, like depending on how cold the water is."

Sasuke scoffed. "That's pretty lame."

"Or those hippy beads. You know those are pretty-pretty simple to walk through you just... push 'em a little bit..."

"I've walked though hot coals and I'm not even a ghost, like I'm just a regular guy."

The fangirl phantom didn't believe it. "pfft... no waaay..."

"Yes way."

She smiled and twisteded her hair. "Wow... heh....that's really kinda....awesome Sasuke. I don't think I've ever really met anyone like you before."

"Wait, how did you know my name was Sasuke?"

Her eyes got shifty. "It's on your embroidered towels, ri-"

"Why are you in my bathroo-"

"Hahaha, I don't watch you when you baaaathe..."

Sasuke bolted upright. "Wait, WHAT?!"

The fangirl looked like a deer caught in headlights. "Wait, what did you just say before I said that?"

Sasuke gave up. "I don't...just...like I need to get some sleep okay? Let's... if you could just go..."

"No, definitely, cool... uh... hey Sasuke?" Sasuke smacked his head back against the headboard. "do you think it'd be cool if I crashed on your couch for a couple weeks? It's just that we already kinda know each-other, I fell like, ya know? And, so it wouldn't be that difficult to adapt. And there's just a ton of weirdoes on kreig's list, you know? And I don't wanna live with someone strange."

No reply.

She tried, "Sooooooooooo..."

"No... Just go, okay?"

"Yeah, I'd really like to leave but... can't really walk through frosted glass sooo..."

Sasuke sighed. "Okay, I'll help you with that." Sasuke begrudgingly lifted himself out of the comfy cocoon he had made for sleeping. "Get out of bed..." his voice was dripping with sarcasm. "To open the door for ya..."

He walked to the other side of the room and eagerly swung the door open. He gestured for the fagirl to leave.

"I guess, it should be fine then..." The fangirl started as she began to float out the door. Slowly.

Too slowly. Sasuke nudged her back to push her out.

"owwwOOWWW! My back, my back!... aiveorowha...." She then sighed dramatically.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Okay." the ghost gave up. "Guess i'll just go make a... frozen booooOOOOOuurrito."

Sasuke inwardly gagged at the pun. "Okay."

"hahaha...I made a-I made a ghost joke, Sasuke... haha. like a- like i'll make a- I'll make a hooooOOOOOt pocket... that's not funny...."

Sasuke gave her another tap out the door. "Goodnight."

Sasuke closed the door and the fangirl started walking away...

"Okay... bye..." she said to no one.

Sasuke woke up and stretched his arms as he gave a long, satisfying yawn.

"What a weird dream" He said to no one.

He looked over to the rest of his bed.

Then, to his horror, on the pillow next to his he saw...

One lone hot pocket, laying ominously on top of a paper plate next to his head.

Then, the voice of the ghostly fangirl in the messed up dream:

A tune (like in the commercial, but creepier.) with an echo bouncing off his walls of, "Hoooooot Pockets..."

YAY CRACK!!!