Here Without You, a warriors fanfic

Old songfic for GrayxSilver. I did always love this pairing... :) I don't own Warriors OR the song "Here Without You" by 3 Doors Down!

Here Without You

For the last time, Graystripe gazed into the eyes of the cat he had loved more than anything. They were lifeless now, and the once shimmering blue depths lay unseeing. Her silver coat was tarnished with blood, and her fur stuck up at odd angles. The gray tom bent over and smoothed her pelt with gentle strokes, fighting back the terrible wave of sadness that was threatening to burst from him at any moment.

"Graystripe?" A tentative voice behind him mewed.

But he didn't even hear Fireheart, and continued to groom his mate, as if it would bring her back to life if he did it long enough. The noises around him melted away. All that was left was her body, lying in the fading evening light. The grief inside built and grew more powerful, choking him, squeezing his lungs and windpipe so he couldn't breath. He couldn't hold it back any longer.

"Silverstream! No!" His terrible wail of grief cut through he thick silence, more anguished than the wail of the dying wolf. More fearful than the cry of the starling in its last moment as a cat pounces upon it. More alone than the bellow of a fawn separated from its mother.

His gray head lowered and he touched his nose to hers. "Please wake up Silverstream. I can't live without you." But nature does not show mercy. It doesn't allow lenience, even for the strongest bonds of love. The body of the Riverclan cat didn't move. It would never move again.

A hundred days had made me older
Since the last time that I've saw your pretty face

Night was plastered around the forest. Graystripe sat alone, gazing out at the river. The waters swirled up to the banks, never ceasing, always changing and never with a definite shape. Small pools of light shone from its gentle waves, reflecting the stars above. Many moons had passed since he had lost the cat whose heart had latched onto his own. The cat who had completed him.

A thousand lights had made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same

The river held many memories, but more than that. Secrets. His amber eyes were clouded as he gazed at the smooth, liquid surface. He couldn't say how he knew it. He just did. A cold breeze ruffled through his fur, and he shivered. His face turned to the sky, where the warriors of Starclan stood vigil over the living. Gaze roving over the stars, he came to rest on one that glowed especially bright. "Who do you have to keep you warm?" he whispered, letting the wind carry his voice to the heavens, hoping against hope she would be able to hear him. And his eyes closed, leaving an imprint of the fiery stars on his lids, as he let sleep take him.

But all the miles that separate
They disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

He found himself standing in a field by the water in the middle of Greenleaf. The air was warm and quiet, but the stars seemed so close that if he had wanted to, he would have been able to swipe his paw into the air and catch one. Suddenly, a voice spoke from the sky. "Welcome, my love."

Graystripe started, but he knew there was nothing to fear. "Silverstream?" he breathed, not daring to be too loud, in case that would end everything, shatter it.

"Yes." The sky began to swirl into a mist, and from it emerged a silver cat, her fur embellished with glittering stars. She walked on paws lighter than air as she glided to his side.

At first, he hesitated. Could he touch this Starclan cat? But the urge was too strong. He bounded to her side and pressed his face into her side, inhaling her sweet scent. Words weren't needed.

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight, it's only you and me

The sun's light began to peek over the horizon, but where the horizon was, he could not tell. The sky above remained as dark as ever, but no matter which way he turned his head, he saw a glow out of the corner of his eyes.

"The sun rises in the forest; in the waking world" Silverstream's smooth voice mewed in his ear. He turned and peered into her face, and find he couldn't wrench his gaze away. He wanted to stay here forever, his tail entwined with hers, their pelts brushing.

Silverstream gave him a purr of reassurance, and stood, her pelt gleaming with health. "Good-bye for now, Graystripe. But remember, I'm always with you."

The world collapsed around him, and with one last look of deepest longing toward Silverstream, he let the light take over, and he opened his eyes once more to find himself beside the river, alone. The stars were gone, but as he peered into the water, he thought he could still see them, though distant, shimmering silently, waiting for night.

The miles just keep rolling
As the people either way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go

"Why?" he asked. "Why did you have to leave me?" But though his heart ached, it felt more fulfilled than before; slightly more at rest.

A small gust blew past him, but with it, he thought he could detect the smallest voice. "You are never alone. Just look hard, and you will find hope all around you. Live life, Graystripe. Live and love."

Graystripe was silent. The small breeze died away, but his heart swelled. True, she was gone, but she was within his own body. Her love would always be a part of him. Always.

Everything I know,
And anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won't take away my love
And when the last one falls,
When it's all said and done
It gets hard but it won't take away my love

Shakily, he rose to his paws and began to pad back to camp. As bird song surrounded him, welcoming the dawn, a flash of sunlight streaked across the river. He whirled around, and saw the river being illuminated by the ray of light. The dancing waters glowed a golden...silver. A small smile forced its way onto his face, and he gave the water one last look before turning his paws back towards home, knowing tonight, when the stars came out to keep vigil again, she would be waiting for him.

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
but you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me