Hi there! How are you?
Well, this is my first fanfic in English (because I'm actually Spanish, so I'm sorry for all the possible mistakes that can appear during the story ^^). I really hope you like it! Kisses! ^^
Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VII.
The girl got out of one of the two tents, completely in silence, trying not to wake up both of her friends, that were resting beside her. She walked slowly, getting away of the refuge where they decided to spent the night.
After visiting Cosmo Canyon that day, Aeris had been feeling confused enough to not sleep. But, maybe "confused" wasn't the right term to describe her feelings by that time. Apart of confused, she also felt that she had learnt something really important about her own existence. Bugenhagen told them about the Lifestream and its importance for the Planet, as well as Mako Energy. Aeris confirmed what she had learnt all those years before: when people die, they return to the Planet.
But she understood something really important, too. It hadn't been told, or written. It was there, in the air, and she only had discovered its existence.
When she was far enough from the refuge, she looked up at the sky, watching the stars shining like thousands of dorts at night, fascinated by the beautiful landscape. In Midgar, there were no stars. Neither Sun nor clouds. Neither rain nor wind. In Midgar, darkness was there all time. The city was always dull and gray. But when she looked at that pure sky, without any pollution, she knew that the world was something more than Midgar. Something bigger, something more interesting.
Then, the girl undid her braid, taking the pink ribbon between her soft, delicate hands and she let her long chestnut hair loose. Aeris took from the ribbon one little sphere that shone under the moonlight. That sphere, the White Materia, had belong to her mother, Ifalna. It was an ancestral Materia, that belonged to the Ancients, her race, and which only they were able to use it.
She, at the moment, was able to use it. That was the great reveal that Aeris discovered while they were at Bugenhagen's observatory, when he said that the Planet was slowly dying.
It was true. The Planet had an open wound that would be hard to heal. But, how could she help the Planet? Was there a correct way for doing it? Maybe there was only one way, summoning the White Materia. Asking Holy, its protector, for help.
But, how? There were so many questions in her mind. When? Why? Have she to die for the Planet? Was she prepared to close her eyes forever, to die for saving everyone around?
The most immediate and sincere answer from Aeris was "yes". Of course, she would do it. She had never been selfish. She would die without hesitation in order to give a new hope to the Planet.
However, it was very easy to say it. It was easy to say "I would die for the Planet, if necessary". It was easy to talk about death without knowing the complexity of itself. Aeris was aware that dying didn't mean the end of her being but another way of living. Nevertheless, she was scared.
She had been living that way for 22 years now. With her mother Ifalna, with her mother Elmyra. With her first love, Zack. Selling flowers at the slums. Being a special kid. A different one. Opening her eyes in the morning, stretching in the bed, laughing with her mother. Hearing the voices from the Planet, who kept her calm, except when someone died, because it was a lacerating and cold feeling that made her feel afraid. She was used to live that way, so would she be able to do something so important in her life? To overcome her fears, to greet the Death like it was an old friend?
She couldn't lie to herself. She was afraid. Afraid of leaving behind that wonderful life. Well, maybe it wasn't the most marvelous life of all, because she hadn't luxures and she wasn't rich. She had spent seven years of her life in a laboratory, being studied by a crazy scientist. She had lost her real parents and she heard voices that weren't even her own. Many times, she had to run away before getting caught by Shin-Ra. Many times, she had panicked when thinking about being captured again. But, despite it all, she considered her life as a beautiful life, because it was hers.
But she was afraid of closing her eyes and not seeing anything else. No more awakenings, no more feelings, no more thoughts, no more laughs, no more tears. No more love. She was just beginning to live and had to say goodbye already.
She was just beginning to discover the world. If she wouldn't have met Cloud and his friends from AVALANCHE she would had been living at the slums yet, without knowing more than her flowers from the Church, the ones that she loved too much.
Cloud…she remembered what he told her when they were around the bonfire, that night, some hours before.
"But I'm…we're here for you, right? Does it mean we can't help?" Aeris felt a shiver coming up her spine. Why had she been so stupid, so stubborn to kept silent and gazed around? She left Cloud confused. He was only triying to help her, to make her feel comforted.
Cloud…she didn't want to leave him behind. It would be painful. And it would be painful to leave behind her friends from AVALANCHE, of course. Tifa, Barret, Nanaki, Yuffie… but, with Cloud, she had established a very special bond, a pure one.
At first, he reminded her of Zack. His gestures, his kindness, even the way he walked or some grimace. But Aeris noticed that Cloud wasn't Zack. Cloud was a very different person. With his shyness, with his quietness. He was a totally different man. And she couldn't help falling in love with that blond guy with intense blue eyes.
However, she felt that he was lost, a bit confused. Although he didn't tell anyone, although he even wasn't aware of it, he was lost and Aeris knew it. And, for that reason, she wanted to help him, to guide his path, at least during the time they will spend together, before…
A tear ran down her cheek, without control. Then, she felt a little silly. Coward, perhaps. She was feeling brave some time before, assuming her fate, and now… she was afraid of closing her eyes forever.
-Can't you sleep? - asked a voice from behind, a very deep one. She jumped a little, scared, and she dried her tears before turning to him.
-I wanted to look at the stars before going to sleep. - she explained . Then, as he just noticed that the sky was there, he looked up to the stars, firmly, with his deep azure eyes. - It's really beautiful the sky here, don't you think? - she asked, smiling.
-You were crying, right? - he asked, worried, while he return to gaze her again, his eyes intensely on hers.
She bit her lip before answer.
-How long have you been here? - she wondered, a little bit nervous.
-A long enough…-he muttered, his cheeks flushed, while he ran a hand through his spiky blond hair, gazing around. - Sorry. I didn't mean to spy you. - he gave her a little smile, one he only had for her.
-It doesn't matter - she said, smiling tenderly.
-And…why were you crying? - he insisted.
Aeris looked down to the ground, sad. "Sorry, Cloud" she thought. "I can't explain it you yet. It's not that I don't want to. It's that…I don't know how to do it."
-Well… It's because all that happened today. All the things I learnt…I'm a little confused now. - she told him, confidently. - But…I suppose everything is going to be alright now. - Aeris whispered.
-I suppose - he said, staring at her.
Aeris looked at his expression, trying to decipher it. It was like… he wanted to apologize for something?
However, they kept silent, looking at the stars. Finally, Cloud broke the silence between them.
-Aeris, about what I've told you before…- she turned her gaze to him. He seemed edgy. - I'm sorry. I'm not really good at talking, but the only thing I wanted was to comfort you, because…you looked sad. Even so, I want you to know that I…I mean…We…- he corrected himself quickly, afraid of being rejected, afraid of she not sharing his feelings, afraid of that almost ethereal, angelic and pure girl he had in front of him didn't want to feel the same as him - We will always be here for you and…
But Aeris didn't let him finished, because she jumped into his arms, hugging him tightly. He stayed static, surprised. However, he decided to listen to his heart and he wrapped his strongs arms around her thin body, while he stroke her silky hair with one of his hands, closing his blue eyes.
"I'm sorry Cloud." Aeris thought, smiling "I'm sorry for being so impetous, so intense, but…I don't know how long can we stay together. But…the end doesn't have to happen tonight".