Written for the Croctober Fic Challenge.

Everyone remembers their first. It's one of those things in life that remains with you, no matter what else the years ahead bring to you. And yes, you'll have many more of much better quality and better ones that will last much longer. There will no doubt be the ones that were mistakes but even the ones that were mistakes, will remain tucked deep away in the recesses of your mind to be over shadowed by, the first.

You spend most of your time dreaming of this special moment—the one that fills you with warmth and a pride that you've never felt before. There's a special aura about you and you know you're a better person despite your consistent failures. You lie in bed on those cold, lonely nights, staring at the ceiling and picturing everything in your mind. You justify that having waited so long and suffered through the frustration of being so close so many times, you deserve this newfound peer admiration and you bask in it.

You brag about her, profess time after time your undying devotion to her, promise to never forget her and the pleasure she gives you, and unlike other people she has been with, you promise not to abandon her and leave her alone. You'll even wait a lifetime for her.

And as the days pass and your attachment grows stronger, your dependence on her becomes a power you never knew existed. She starts to take full control over your thoughts and the daily seemingly mundane chores are only a necessity to go through so you can be with her when you're done. You rush out at the end of your day, knowing she is waiting for you. For your touch that will let her know you're there for her.

So, is there anyone out there who thinks that these feelings aren't the ones you have or have had before? If you look deep enough, I'm certain they're still hidden inside of you. You remember how warm and graceful she was, how she had a way of transferring that warmth to you every time you touched her. How all of the troubles seemed to fade away and all you wanted to do was be with her in the safety of her embrace.

I know I'll always remember my first. Carly Shay. She holds a special deep-rooted, hidden spot in my heart and I hope she always will. She was stunning—a deadly combination of good looks, sex appeal and just the adequate amount of shine to catch the eye of every poor observer.

I hope she remembers me too.