Life, suddenly, seemed pretty darn good. Amazing, really.
The windows were open, the doors were open. The hushed whispers within the confines of the castle walls were gone, staff and visitors laughing and admiring the art, the architecture, the gardens and the view. There were occasional events held around the castle. Afternoon teas, dinners with foreigners and Arendellians alike.
Anna was happy. So very, very happy. She was no longer alone, trapped within her home. She was free to come or go as she pleased, more or less, and eagerly met and spoke to anyone with whom she crossed paths. She knew so many townspeople by name now; asked after their spouses, children, took an interest in their lives. And they took an interest in hers as well.
She frequently ventured down to the fjords, gazing over the water and exploring the grassy areas between them. She fed the ducks around the lakes, took hikes, and even got Kristoff to put up swings in a tree in the gardens so they could swing together.
Speaking of Kristoff…she had found the love of her life. True love. She knew it for what it was, this time. It was so different, how she felt, than she had with Hans. But even so, she was going to take this one slowly. No use in speeding up something so good. It had only been three months, anyway, since they had met.
He was…different. She had never expected to fall in love with someone like him. He was tall, yes, but not dark or classically handsome. Instead, though, she had fallen in love with his kindness. She loved the way he was always looking out for her, catching her when she tripped over nothing or pulling her back from falling off the dock. She loved the warmth in his eyes, the feel of the calluses on his hands over her skin. The crook of his smile and his big nose that felt funny in her face when they kissed. He made her feel safe and loved.
She also saw that he wanted to make Elsa feel that way, though in a different way than Anna, of course. Anna saw how he glanced over at Elsa to see how she handled it when news was brought in suddenly. She saw the crease in his forehead that he got when he saw her sister rushing from breakfast with books in her arms, or even just to see her visible delight, after he looked at Anna, when there was triple chocolate cake for dessert. Anna knew that he cared deeply for both of them, and loved that they felt so much like a family. So yes, life did seem pretty amazing. For many reasons, but especially because, for the first time in forever, Elsa was truly, genuinely, family to Anna.
Anna knew that Elsa was feeling so much happier. Like there was actually something worth living for. She smiled now, frequently. Anna loved seeing her sister's teeth, as odd as that seemed. The just-barely visible crookedness of her grin, the slight overlapping of teeth. It meant that it was a genuine smile, or that she was freely laughing and not holding back. It meant she was being Elsa, and not The Queen. Anna closed her eyes and smiled, imaging the feel of Elsa's arms wrapped around her in a hug. Elsa didn't initiate them, but would kind of hold out her arms in a funny way, as if asking for permission for one. Anna laughed thinking of it. She would always jump into the outstretched arms, and Elsa's would close around her tight, squeezing, as if afraid she would leave her. They even held hands occasionally. Anna loved feeling her sister's cool palm in hers, fingers grasping hers securely.
The sisters were often seen together now. They met up for a meal at least a couple times a week. On occasion the two would read together or ride their old tandem bike through an abandoned hallway. If she had time at night, Elsa would come in to Anna's room to brush out her hair before bed. That was Anna's favorite new ritual. And even though Elsa was most commonly found in her bedroom, her study or the library, she still came and went as needed around the entire castle. And she never locked any doors. Physical ones, anyway.
But after only three months, everything that was so new to Elsa brought stress and difficulties along with the good.
First was the threat of interacting with so, so many people. Advisors, dignitaries, councilmen, townspeople, staff…the list went on and on. What should she say? What was the right thing to say? What did all these people want, need to hear? What was the proper social convention? Was she reacting, responding the correct way? What did they think of her?
She could never tell what was right based on people's reactions. She felt her heart twisting in anticipation in her chest when someone approached her. Steady your breathing, she'd tell herself. Just think things through. Don't overthink it. They're not going to hurt you.
But what if she hurt them?
Her powers vastly in her control now; an accidental release that would cause harm was further back in the recesses of her mind than it had ever been. Yet the threat still remained. What if a disagreement became too heated during a political meeting? What if a visiting dignitary wouldn't agree to reasonable terms, insulted her culture, her country, her people? What if someone happened to startle her just by simply dropping a tray?
Not only did the worries of social interaction eat away at her, the more tangible obligations of her work yielded their own physical effects.
So many things had to be done. Meetings, planning, advisements, updates, speeches, correspondence, research, studying. It was never-ending. There were never-shrinking, only-growing piles of books and ledgers all over her desks, tables and bed. Eternal ink stains upon her now-exposed fingers, echoing of arguments over policies and laws in her ears even when she tried to sleep. Shaded, blue-black half-moons under her eyes most days-some days barely visible, some days much darker. Frequented now by tension behind her eyes and a throbbing underneath her temples, many came to recognize her cooled hand placed to her forehead or iced fingers rubbing circles above her ears as a regular sight.
As much as Anna saw the positive changes in her sister- acceptance of hugs and light touches, wide smiles and physical presence around the castle, she wasn't blind to the darker edges around Elsa, as some would think. Though she didn't always act on or vocalize them, she did see the stresses brought on Elsa and her inner struggles in dealing with them. She knew that her sister was better. That she was working so, so hard to overcome the scars of her past thirteen years and show, even embody, warmth, grace and contentment. But Anna knew that some scars could never heal completely, and accepted that. At least for now, while the scabs were still fresh. So she tried to do what she could to make the transition easier for her sister.
Which is why, when Kai rapped lightly on her door one early afternoon, Anna made a decision that she hoped would give way to a lessening of anxiety on Elsa's part, and not the opposite.
"Princess?" Kai called from behind her door.
She let him into her bedroom, where Kristoff sat perched on the corner of her bed. Anna's hair was not yet braided, and though she was dressed, her shoes were off and her dress had yet to be tied in the back. Kai assumed she had just been getting ready for the day.
Anna's forehead creased with worry. It was unusual for Kai to sound so…unsure of himself when calling for her. And he looked hesitant now, nervous. Kristoff noticed too, and rose from the bed to join Anna.
"Kai?" Anna asked. "Is…is something going on? What's wrong?"
Kai heaved a heavy sigh, ran a hand over his thinning hair. He cleared his throat. "Nothing, princess. Nothing that cannot be handled. But, I…" he trailed off, growing red, as Anna and Kristoff exchanged nervous glances and waited for him to compose his thoughts. "I hope that I am not overstepping my bounds. I…I think that you will understand why I have come to you first."
"Come to me first? What?" Anna asked again. She was frustrated now; her voice had an edge to it. "Kai, what's going on? Just tell me."
"Very well." Kai cleared his throat once more. "I come to ask for your direction in a matter that has just been brought to my attention. I thought it best to bring it to you first before discussing a plan of action with the queen." He took a breath. "There's…there's a small horde of people - farmers, that is, come a bit of a way from the south. They're protesting now just outside the gates-"
"Wait, what?" Anna interrupted, confused. "Why are they protesting? Haven't the guards taken care of it?" She stopped for a second, letting his previous words sink in. "Wait," she started. "I don't understand. Why wouldn't you bring this to Elsa first?"
Kai brought his hands together in front of him, as if to stop from moving them as he spoke. "I'm trying to explain, Princess. The group has suffered a rough harvest. Many of their crops have died, and there seems to have been some sort of pestilence that has spread through many of their fields."
He looked at Anna and Kristoff to see if he still had their attention. They were looking at him intently, puzzled looks and anticipation clearly wrought across their faces. He continued.
"They…they are blaming the Queen for what has happened. They claim she has brought a curse upon their land with her magic-"
Anna gasped audibly, and even Kristoff's eyes widened in shock, his hand coming up to rest supportively on Anna's shoulder from behind her where he stood. Kai continued as the couple listened on in silence.
"-they are demanding an audience with her, as well as high recompense for the 'damage and scourge' which she called to their fields. It seems as though some want payment and for the curse to be removed, while others came carrying weapons, which, of course, we have removed from their persons."
Kai paused, while Anna and Kristoff remained quiet to let his words sink in. After a moment, Anna spoke first, her lips turned in a frown while her eyes darkened in fear and worry.
"So that's why you came to me first…" she trailed off, her voice nearly a whisper. Her eyebrows were low right over her eyes in thought. She took a deep breath, bringing her arm up to clasp Kristoff's hand resting on her shoulder. Their joined hands were brought down to their sides between them, and Kristoff twisted to look at her worriedly.
"Indeed, Princess," Kai agreed. "There are many ways to handle this. But I thought it best to first speak with you, indecorous as it may be. I thought that the Queen might be…especially unsettled with the matter, and was wondering if there, ahem, perhaps was a way to…for her to not…" he couldn't seem to find the correct words. What he was suggesting, it was- well, it was-
"For her to not know," Anna finished for him. She sighed heavily. Her hair, frizzy and spread around her face and shoulders made her face seem shadowed, her eyes dark and contemplating. "You're right," she said. "She can't know. We can't let her find out. She won't take it well. She's got enough to handle right now." She faced Kristoff, her fingers still wrapped in his. "But what do we do?"
Kristoff was unused to such matters- political, familial, emotional- whichever category one would place this one in. He couldn't even begin to fathom the actions needed to be taken to appease the crowd while protecting his girlfriend's sister. But he did agree with Anna. Elsa shouldn't be dealing with anything more than she already was…especially when it involved herself in such a delicate manner.
As much as he was beginning to see Elsa as a real person now, and not a queen, Kristoff was growing to see the ghosts that followed Elsa, whether they were related to her past or her position. She was still scared of herself, that much was obvious. Maybe it was easier for Kristoff to notice because that was how she was when he first met her, but even now he sensed her fear in many of his observed interactions of her.
He didn't discuss what he saw with Anna much; he knew she already worried enough about it. But Kristoff saw the way Elsa's hands clenched into fists when a noise startled her, her shoulders climbing to her ears, or the way her chest seemed to rise and fall more deeply, heavily, when she was approached by someone she wasn't expecting to speak to- as if she was vigilantly controlling her breathing.
He noticed as her cheekbones seemed to stand out more during stressful, hectic times, then plump out slightly again when the work had lessened enough that she allowed herself time to eat. He watched the brightness and glee in her eyes when teasing Anna, yet the shadowing under them on the nights that he heard faint cries from the room a few doors down.
Despite these things he observed, Kristoff knew that Elsa was capable of dealing with whatever situation was thrown at her. She had always impressed him- he knew she had to deal with an excruciating amount of work and stress on top of all that she had to contend with beneath her skin. But everyone had their limits, and Kristoff had no desire to see Elsa reach hers again.
Kristoff shook his head at Anna, eyes closed briefly. "I don't know what to tell you to do." Anna sighed at his lack of a solution. "But," he began, Anna looked excitedly up to him again, "I think that it'd be best to find some way for us to deal with this instead."
Anna nodded solemnly, her decision made. She turned back to Kai. "Okay, so we don't tell her," she said. "So now…wait!" She showed her back to Kristoff, twisting her head back to see him- "tie me up!" She nearly ordered. Kristoff jumped, surprised, and began tying up the back of her dress as she spoke.
"Let's see…Kai, get the captain of the guard, the treasurer and the agriculturist. Let's all meet in the small conference room in fifteen minutes."
It was the end of the small, impromptu meeting. Actions had been deliberated on, outcomes discussed and decisions made. The small mob would be asked to select a few representatives to speak on their behalf. The remainder would be sent home with the guidance of the kingdom's agriculturist-who would attempt to educate the people on the true cause of the pestilence- while their delegation spoke with the representatives of Arendelle- the captain of the guard, Kai, and Anna- those who would not leak what had happened to the queen. They would solve the remaining issue from there.
But they knew one thing for certain; had all come to the same conclusion. Anna spoke the words. "We can't tell Elsa."
