Spoilers come from Season Four episode "Always."
I was proud of Alexis and all she had done. Her speech was touching and well written. Something she said seemed to stick to me more than the rest. There is always someone that becomes a permanent part of us despite our best efforts to detach them. I saw Kate's smile when she said those words, but I did not show it. It was hard to walk away even after she showed no regard for any of my feelings. She was determined to destroy her life and I had no power to stop her.
I returned to the house alone. Mom had decided to fly out to the Hampton's without me. The original plan before our last conversation was for Kate to watch a double feature. I found myself completely alone in the loft. I got a call from Alexis offering come home early, but I convinced her not to. I figured that she deserved to have a good time with her friends. College would be coming soon enough and she would be working twice as hard at her exemplary grades. After hanging up the phone I hung her tassel on a lamp realizing just how fast this day had come.
My phone rang. Kate's smiling face was smiling up at me. It hurt. It reminded me that I had one more thing to do. I knew if the murder board stayed I would never really move on. I pulled up the file and felt the hurt hit me. Everyone attached to her mother's murder was dead and she did not seem to care if it took her out too. I dragged the file over to the recycle bin to make it go away once and for all. I forced myself to do it to be exact.
A knock on my door caught my attention. It could not have been mother because she left for the Hamptons. It could not have been Alexis because I just got off the phone with her. It left only one person, but I doubted she would show up again. I was not sure what I would say or how I would react.
There she stood outside my door. She looked like she had taken a shower in her clothes. Her eyes held a different look. Something had changed but I was not sure exactly what.
I asked her what she wanted. Her answer shocked me. I don't just mean her words. Her actions were twice as shocking.
"You." Beckett then stepped into my door and reached for me.
Her kiss would have been welcomed months ago. I would have had a clearer picture of what she felt about me. I felt my reservations and I stuck to them. I heard her apologize about three times. She was about to kiss me again when I asked what had happened.
She told me that he had gotten way and she had not cared. She had nearly died and her only thoughts were about me. She attempted another kiss that I skirted. Her hand touched my cheek just as a bolt of lightning flashed through my windows. I found myself pushing the door shut with the force of her body. I could hardly contain myself. My hands and lips were finally going where only my wildest fantasies had taken me.
Only difference between the fantasies and the reality was that the reality was a hundred times better. She was reacting to me and I felt myself reacting to her. I could have pinched myself but she would have thought me crazy. It was not until I had unbuttoned her shirt that I had paused.
I saw the scar. I thought of how far we had come and all we had survived. It wasn't ugly or bad, but special. It was not until then that I gave her the tenderest kiss. I felt her take her fingers into mine. She led us back to my bedroom with the kind of smile she had never given me before.
I lived out my greatest fantasies a million times over. Niki Heat had nothing on her inspiration. Any assumptions I had about what was underneath that exterior were blown out of the water. She turned out to be better than anything I could have imagined. The best part is that it was all worth it. I got up and put on my robe as she slept peacefully on the other side.
I made some coffee and some breakfast. I looked at the clock and noticed that the time was about the time that she would normally be at the precinct. I could not explain it but it seemed as if she had not told me something. I could ask when I brought in the tray of food.
"Good morning beautiful." I called through the bedroom door.
Her eyes fluttered open as if she was not sure what to think at first. When she realized it was me and some food, she smiled. Her hair looked like a halo on her pillow. I was tempted to use the worst come one line on her and mean every word. She had been different than my wives and all the girlfriends. I could not quite figure out how she was different, but she was.
"Good morning yourself handsome." She finally sat up to look at me.
The sheets covered up the scar ever so slightly. She was still beautiful all the same. I wanted to ask but she stopped the questions with how she looked wrapped up in the sheet. Maybe after some food she would be up to the question. She was just too beautiful to ask.
After she had finally eaten everything, she only looked at me. The look was not the somber look that she had given me when she arrived but one I had always wished for. She had not told me that she was in love with me, but I could see it in her eyes.
"Castle, Thank you. I know that it took a lot to forgive me. I am sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. You showed me love and I made a point of stepping on it. Thank you for loving me." I liked the tenderness I was seeing in her.
"I meant what I said. I love you still." I placed a gentle kiss on her lips.
She had transformed overnight into the woman I had never known up close and personal. I loved it and I wondered how long it would last.
"I'll meet you out in the living room. I need to clean up." She finally got herself out of my bed and into my bathroom for a shower.
"We need to talk when you get out. Now that things have changed, we have a lot to work through and figure out." I tried not to scare her with my words.
Typically the words "We Need to Talk" mean trouble. It could still mean trouble. I would have to find out when she got back. What she still my fearless detective or was there a chance that she had given it all up?