Hello everyone this is Kiro here this is my first fanfiction that I've ever written well technically it's not the first was a stupid kingdom heart's short paragraph about roxas being trapped in the real world and never watched Xion die but that's beside the point what I'm saying is for this first chapter I'd love some constructive criticism I'm not too good at writing but I'm going to try. This is a RWBY spin-off which ties into my book that I'm writing which employs the multiverse theory ya know that thing that explains that there's probably a dimension out there where you're Batman and I'm Harley Quinn and were locked in an endless loop of viciously banging on the kitchen floor. Im writing these little series so I can share my adventures of recruiting the forces of good to help win a war with out gaining profit from someone else's stuff and that way I can shorten my book because good God would that be a lot of adventures but this is the telling of my adventures through remnant so shut up sit the fuck down cause it's story time
Kaden had already been to highschool several times in fact he wasn't to excited about classes but he was very excited about the prospects this dimension held. He saw them from across the ship at window looking out on the campus. Ruby and Yang, he knew who they were how could he not ,when he was on phy ( pronounced Fuh-eye but smoother) RWBY was one of his favorite shows of course he never realized that he was playing with people's lives. He wanted to approach them but he knew he should bide his time, he learned early on that when he entered a dimension he changed some aspects of the world like certain people's personalities shifting slightly or greatly, more greatly now that he thinks about it he just hopes the main 8 are the same. A large body bumping into him snaps him out of his daze. He turns to see a tall blonde boy running past him presumably looking for a trashcan he thought as he identified the boy as Jaune Arc. "Hey I think there should be one outside" he called to the motion sick boy. Jaune turned and rushed towards the door mumbling his thanks as passed. Kaden thought to himself checking to see if his mana levels were doing ok with the mind record spell draining his batteries slowly but surely. Why am I thinking this all out in third person what am I the king of Versailles I thought. I had been tweaking my thoughts to have mind record in third person but what the hell first persons more my style. I quickly realized I was the only one left on the ship and that I should stop thinking about magic considering mind reading semblances exist and getting caught is generally a bad situation. Korala was constantly telling me to never use magic in other realms lest I botch the mission. After a brief reflection on the words of my quirky spymaster I jogged of the ship following the sounds of retching. Eventually I found Jaune just finishing his regurgitation. "Stomach problems? " I asked chuckling "yeah motion sickness is real problem, I'm Jaune by the way" "hi Jaune I'm Kaden " I replied confidently extending my hand to shake. After hesitating for a few seconds jaune replies with the same bravado and gives a firm shake. "we should probably get goi-" my sentence is cut off loud bang and a shrill scream. " we should probably check that out huh" "yeah probably" I replied as we set off in the direction of rising smoke.
As we aproached I studied Jaune we were almost identical my hair was shorter and a few shades darker but just as wild, he was taller but I was more muscular and while we both had blue eyes his were a much darker blue compared to my turquoise-teal orbs, not to mention our difference in fashion while he adorned his standard hoodie and armor I sported my trademark long black leather trench coat now outfitted with polished gun metal grey pauldrons and layered plates from collar to tail. We soon arrived at the scene just in time to see a girl I could only place as Blake saunter off away from a bemused Ruby who slowly fell to her knees. Jaune extended his hand to the silver eyes girl" hey I'm Jaune" "ruby" she replied " that's Kaden "Jaune motioned towards me "yo " I answered with a raise of my hand "it's nice to meet you two". After Jaune pulls her to her feet we head off in the direction of the school while we small talk about our favorite things until ruby pulled out crescent rose, the giant mechanical scythe extending and unfolding into it's full glory "I've got this thing" chimed up as I nearly walked into the blade "pretty sick ruby warn us next time though" Jaune just stood in awe "I-is that a scythe " "yup it's also a fully customizable high impact sniper rifle" "eh wha" Jaune spoke still dumbfounded "it's also a gun" I informed him "oohhh". "so what do you guys have" "I've got this sword " piped Jaune as he rediscovered his ability to form sentences " what do they do" " the shield collapses so when I get tired of holding it I can put it away" "nifty here's mine " I unsheathed my twin wakizashis " this is Yoake"(Japanese for "the breaking dawn")the blade was a white gold the same color as sunrise" and this is Munraito sora"(Japanese for "the moonlit sky")this one was solid black with a silver moon at the handle and flecks of silver spread all over the blade to look like stars "what do the names mean" ruby asked excited at the prospect of colors symbolizing some strange hidden technique "well Yoake means the breaking dawn and Munraito Sora means the moonlit sky" " what do they do" Jaune asked now also intrigued "guess you'll have to wait and find out" I replied with a mischievous smirk "what about the one your back " my smirk faded away " I don't use it very often its only for special occasions " I didn't want to tell them that I had trouble taking Flameera out of her sheathe in her first form let alone using her as a weapon " we should probably get going the assembly is going to start soon" and with that I started off with the others trailing behind knowing they'd touched a sore spot.
Hello all please let me know what you thought in the review and comments thing below and send me some suggestions as to what antics my character should get into. I'm going to include pictures for things that you specifically can't look up and find on the web so that way you guys aren't confused on to what's what. I was actually planning to have my character using a plasma sword of sorts because it's not out of the realm of remnants capabilities but I decided against it cause it was boring. I cranked this out in like 3 days so I'm going to update very often unless you guys hate it and then well ill stop.
Any ways this is kiro signing out have good day.