The second Yuujirou started talking about how it was pointless for Sayaka to pursue me, I knew something bad was going to happen.

"Yuujirou…" I said, hoping he'd take the hint.

He didn't listen. "It's a secret, but… your older brother has no interest in girls."

Wait a second… what?! I like girls! I LIKE GIRLS! I heard Mikoto's sharp gasp and that's when my voice decided to…well…stop working. But in my head I was screaming: I LIKE GIRLS I LIKE GIRLS I LIKE GIRLS I LIKE GIRLS!

Poor Sayaka… "That's not true! Tooru-kun liked girls before!" Yeah! I did! I mean, I do! Listen to her! She may be a little crazy, but the girl makes a good point. I like girls. I've dated them before! In fact, the reason I'm here is because my little brilliant cousin here nearly killed one of my girlfriends…

But that idiot kept going, "It doesn't matter what you say. He's going out with me now." I think all of the attention from being a princess has gone to his head. I'm not going out with him. I don't plan on it either. He can be so high maintenance sometimes. Also…I like girls. Then again, he is kinda pretty when he puts on the Princess outfits. Exactly! When he's dressed like a girl!

"Do you think you can fool me?" I just kinda stared… and thought: Oh god, please don't try; oh god, please don't try; oh god, please don't try…

Not to mention: Why are you touching my face? Please…stop touching me, damn it. Stop holding my cheek like you're about to kiss me!

"But it's the truth…Let me…show you the proof." Oh god, that's when everyone sort of snapped. I know I did. As much as I wanted to shove that idiot Yuujirou away and run as fast as possible to my room, my body stopped obeying my brain. The look on Sayaka's face was beyond shocked. It looked like her head was about to implode. Or something.

Then Yuujirou's face started getting really close to mine. I mean really close. More importantly…his lips started getting really close to mine. Really! close! I could practically taste that ridiculous cherry lipgloss he buys (he makes me get watermelon) and I could definitely smell the last sweet bun he'd eaten. His breath was hot as his stupid face with his stupid lips and stupid lipgloss inched closer and closer. Until finally his stupid stupid stupid lips pressed onto mine.

"Nn!" was pretty much all I could manage. Until I started sweating bullets, of course. Oh, now my body starts working. Why couldn't it have started working before he kissed me!? I would have been able to completely avoid delving into homosexuality! And it just kept going and going as I sweat through my clothes and through my wig and through my makeup. But there was no stopping him! UGH! My sweat started dripping from my chin, it was disgusting! And disturbing. And that kiss was completely unwanted! Ass. Idiot. Jerk. Stupid.

I heard Mikoto's bucket drop in all that silence. Silence, that is, aside from the sounds of my sweat droplets hitting the floor. Finally Yuujirou (Idiot!!) pulled away and looked at her smugly. I couldn't even move.

"How was that? Still don't believe it? If you don't, I'll continue."

NO PLEASE NO! PLEASE DON'T CONTINUE, YOU ASSHOLE. YOU EFFING BASTARD! Wait…why am I censoring myself…? YOU FUCKING BASTARD DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT GOING ANY FURTHER!

"Liar! You're lying!" Of COURSE he's lying! She stuttered for a moment then screeched "NO!" as she ran as fast as she could towards the exit.

And… then my voice started working again, but pretty much all I could manage was, "Yuujirou, you…" before he interrupted.

And what's worse (!!) is that Mikoto actually believed it! "Don't take it seriously!" I yelled at him.

Then he acted like nothing strange had just happened and I realized he had a point. She'd be back. Once she'd recovered her wits. "Next time…"

He asked what we should show her next! The nerve! "Yuujirou…" I tried as I shook my fist at him. Though it was kind of difficult to be threatening when one is in Princess garb. Dangit.