Discalimer: I don't own either Stargate: SG-1 or Strike Witches
BTW: SSDD stands for Same Shit Different Day (the title had to be kiddy apropriate)
Prologue
Colonel JonathanJ.O'Neill, commonly referred to as Jack, walked through the halls of Stargate Command to the Gate Room, where the rest of his team and the 'parcel' awaited. He was dressed in the standard SGC BDU, Kevlar vest with a Zat'nik'tel, commonly called a Zat gun – a Goa'uld handgun like weapon in the shape of a serpent – strapped to his thigh and carrying the standard issue P90.
He walked into the gate room where the rest of his team, Major SamanthaCarter, who was simply called Sam, , and Teal'c of Chulak – a Jaffa worrier who had defected – were already waiting with a cart full of rifles and various other weapons, and a small portion of Naquadah. They all had the same gear as Jack, save for Teal'c who had a Goa'uld staff weapon – an energy weapon that was powered by liquid Naquadah. The motorised cart of weapons and Naquadah was for the people of P3X 282 to assist them in overthrowing their dictator.
"You know," Jack began to the rest of his team as he slipped on his black military cap, "I understand why we're giving them guns, but can someone please tell me why we're giving them Naquadah, one of the rarest and most valuable elements in our universe?"
"Because Chackon," Daniel said, using the name the locals had assigned to P3X 282, "is rich in Naquadah."
"Care to explain a bit further?" Jack asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Think of it as a loan," Sam chimed in, "we give them this batch here along with some guns for them to reverse engineer to help free their people, and in return they give us a steady supply of Naquadah once they get their mines up and running."
"Chevron one encoded," one of the operators in the control room said over the PA, as the ring started turning.
"I still don't get why we're being sent," Jack said, shaking his head, "Shouldn't one of the other teams handle this, I was on holiday."
"Chevron two encoded."
Daniel rested his hands on the P90 that was connected to his Kevlar vest with a single connection strap, "It's a sensitive situation, Jephie…" Jephie was the dictator on P3X 282, "…has threatened to detonate a Naquadah bomb in the capital."
"Chevron three encoded."
"They're sending us to deal with a Naquadah bomb?!" Jack yelled, "That's SG-4's specialty."
"Chevron four encoded."
"I believe this needs more tact than SG-4 poses," Teal'c added.
Jack crossed his arms, "Fine, let's get this over with."
"Chevron five encoded."
"So how long has this civil war been going on, anyway?" Jack asked, wanting to know exactly what his team was walking into.
"A couple of years," Daniel replied.
"Chevron six encoded."
Jack sighed, "Some days, I hate this job."
Teal'c raised his eyebrow, the way in which showed he was confused, "I thought you said you loved this job?"
"Chevron seven encoded."
The Gate came to life, the 'splash' coming right up to the yellow and black line.
"A'ight people," Jack said loudly to his team, "let's go overthrow a dictator."
They stepped through the Gate, the motorised cart following close behind.
Unbeknownst to the SGC, the moment SG-1 stepped through the Gate, Jephie detonated the Naquadah bomb, destroying the Gate on P3X 282. Due to the 'return to sender' safety protocol built into all gates, SG-1 was sent back to earth mid wormhole; however the wormhole was hit by a solar flare, sending SG-1 not to their Earth.