Dear Mister Advice

by Soul Raider 116

HIATUS. Shigure starts an advice column in the local paper, and go figure, the cast of Furuba needs a lot of advice. It's just for fun, so don't flame me! Rated T for language and possible violence. R&R

1. Annoyed

Disclaimer: I do not own FB. This story is just for fun, and I do not claim that the characters will be even remotely IC. I'm also probably gonna switch between Manga and Anime versions, so no flaming, lol.

Chapter 1: Annoyed

Shigure sighed happily as he sat down at his computer. Writing was fun, writing smut was even more fun, and writing this advice column should be the most fun of all! He had taken the job because he figured it would allow him to get juicy stories on the people in town. But he had made the newspaper promise not to tell his editor, as he knew that she would have a fit, saying something to the extent of, "You can't get your novels done, but you can do this!"

As fun as it was to tease his editor, he didn't want her bugging him to quit this job. He cracked his knuckles, opening the first E-mail, and chuckling as he saw what was contained within.

PdPdPdPdPdPdPdPdPdPdPdPdPd

Dear Mr. Advice,

I can't believe I'm actually writing to this damned column! Look, there's this girl, and…she has this crazy crush on me! She's been in love with me since we were little, or so she says! And every time I see her, she beats me nearly to death! And if you even dare make some wise crack about a girl beating me up, I'll track you down and beat the shit out of you! Just tell me how to get rid of her!

Annoyed

Shigure pondered this for a moment, and then smiled, knowing exactly who this letter was from. "Kyou…it has to be. And the girl is Kagura…" He laughed softly, then set to work typing a response.

Dear Annoyed,

Perhaps this girl simply needs to be shown some attention. Instead of continuously running from her, why not go out with her a couple times? A couple things might happen, one, you may discover that you like her more than you thought, or two, once you've stopped being so impossible to obtain, she'll lose interest. You have to try and think like a woman, figure out her motivations, and her needs. Then, use her own techniques of manipulation against her! You could try, for example, coming onto her as strongly as she does to you. Then, she'll see how annoying it is, and perhaps leave you alone.

Mr. Advice

Author's Note: Yes, this chapter was short, but it mostly served as a prologue. Lol. Tune in next time to see the advice be played out, and to see what Mr. Advice's next letter will be! Who do you think should go next? Any suggestions and even reasons for the person to be writing in would be appreciated!