Aaaaaand I am alive. This story is rather old, I will admit, but I think it still wants to be read, so here we go!

Warning: this story is mostly crack, but there is a plot if you squint.
Disclaimer: I admit to owning nothing but the nonsense.

No intended slash, but if you can see it and claim it's there, then sure, go ahead, have fun.

Enjoy!

"Come on, Arthur."

"Morgana, you can't seriously—"

"You lost the bet."

"Morgana, I am the crown prince of Camelot!"

"Yes, Arthur, and you lost the bet. Or are you not a man of your word?"

Arthur huffed exasperatedly at his step-sister. "But, Morgana, the whole of Camelot will…."

"Arthur, are you a man of your word or not?" Morgana asked, cocking one perfect eyebrow.

He made a high-pitched whining noise, but she was unmoved. "Fine," he sighed reluctantly, regretting the word as soon as it was out. "But, please, can we just—"

"No. Now," she said, holding up a large piece of silky turquoise fabric, "I think this one will make your eyes pop."

Arthur's eyes widened. "Wait, Morgana, what about—"

"Would you prefer this one?" she intercepted, pulling out a gaudy magenta. "I find it would also suit you perfectly!"

Arthur very near started gagging, but managed to control his rising bile in time to speak. "The blue one," he ground out.

The prince's step-sister cocked her head innocently. "The blue one what, Arthur?"

Arthur glared incredulously at her. "The blue one, please," he said as calmly as he could, grimacing and turning away.

Morgana's eyes had a dangerous gleam in them. "The pink one it is, then!"

Arthur whirled around to stare at her. "Morgana!" he shrieked.

She pursed her lips, contemplating the pink cloth. "You're right, it's more of a rose, isn't it?" She beamed. "And a lavender trim would look great!"

Arthur most definitely did not start crying at that moment.

Merlin caught up to Gwen, who was running through the corridors with a thin strip of lavender silk trailing behind her.

"Gwen!" he panted when she didn't stop.

"Not now, Merlin," she deflected, just barely avoiding running into a wall and turning sharply through an arch to the next hall.

Merlin, however, was never that lucky. He ran straight into the wall, bouncing off and stumbling slightly with a dazed expression, before collapsing to the ground.

Thankfully, the good-hearted Guinevere had stopped her mad rush when her friend fell. She hastily backtracked, helping him to his feet. Her brows were furrowed in concern. "Oh, Merlin! I'm so sorry! Are you alright?"

Merlin frowned at a spot in the air a little to her right, and blinked a few times before his eyes finally rested upon hers. "What?"

Gwen let out a small chuckle of relief. "You ran into a wall."

The young man's mouth formed a small 'o'. "I did?"

She frowned, worry marring her features. "Should I take you to Gaius, Merlin?"

He frowned. "Gaius? Gaius…." He paused, scrunching up his face in thought. His face suddenly relaxed in recognition. "Wait. Gaius? No, no, don't take me to Gaius… hey, I just ran into a wall for you! You could at least tell me why you've been running around the castle like a madwoman!"

"Oh." Gwen blushed. Did she really seem as flustered as she felt? "Well, Morgana sent me to fetch this," she said, waving the silk ribbon a little, "and she said it was urgent, so I was just hurrying back." She frowned again as her dark-haired friend seemed to chase imaginary flies with his eyes. "Merlin, are you sure you're alright?"

He blinked at her. "Hmm? Oh. Um, I may have a slight concussion. Maybe." He frowned, looking around a little. "I don't know. Have you seen Arthur?"

"Merlin, I should take you to Gaius—"

"Is he in Morgana's chambers?"

The serving girl's eyes widened, and her cheeks flushed. "Um, no, why… why would he be?"

Merlin gave her a lopsided grin. "He is, isn't he?" He didn't wait for her to answer. "So he lost the bet, then?"

Gwen frowned. "What bet?"

Merlin smirked in amusement. "Morgana bet Arthur that he couldn't run around the entire castle in under five minutes."

"What does he have to do, if he's lost?"

"That's what I'm going to figure out," Merlin declared, straightening and walking off in an unsteady diagonal line towards another wall.

"Merlin?" Gwen called.

"Hmm?"

"Morgana's chambers are this way," she said, pointing in the opposite direction. Merlin blinked, swivelling his head from the wall, to her, and back again. He gave a small fake laugh like he'd known it all along, and quickly followed her.

Characterization may be horribly off; I don't know. I haven't gone over this story recently. If so, please consider this an AU.

Next chapter should be up tomorrow, if I can remember!