Name: The Unbeatable Strategy
By: Princess Yori
Summary: Gan Ning helps Zhou Yu come up with a plan, and pulls a prank on Ling Tong.
Genre: Friendship
Rating: K+
Setting: Wu DW6 Unknown battle

Disclaimer: All mentioned characters, settings, and such belong to Koei Corp.

Zhou Yu stared down at the scrolls rolled out in front of him; he'd been staring long enough to make the words run together. His head ached on top of it all, but he couldn't quit until he'd come up with a proper diversion for Lu Meng to slip past the supply depot's defenses. It should have been easy for Zhou Yu to develop a plan, but he'd already dispatched everyone to different stations. He massaged his head before shoving the scrolls away and collapsing hopelessly onto the desk.

"Hey, after I take down the defense base, which by the way I could do on my own, what am I supposed to do?" Gan Ning again, second time today. First was to complain about Ling Tong tagging along on his mission. Zhou Yu figured forcing the two to work together would fix the rift between them; the two of them disagreed heavily.

"Guarding it?" He groaned into the desk.

"What? You mean that's it? One base and Gan Ning is out of the game?" An annoyed 'tch' followed shortly after his rant. "C'mon there's gotta be somethin' else I can do?"

Zhou Yu slid his head up, staring at Gan Ning, slightly frustrated, but hopeful. If Gan Ning could distract the officer guarding the gate, Lu Meng's attack would be successful, and the battle would be theirs. But the lesson would be void, and he and Ling Tong would still disrupt peaceful days with their bickering.

"There is something…but…" Zhou Yu shook his head, ridiculous he was even considering this, the whole point of Gan Ning's mission…. He sighed again; some things had to be put on the back burner for the greater good he supposed.

"But what? You don't think I can handle it do you? C'mon! I can't stand defending all day!"

"I need someone to distract the guard at the supply depot, he'll be powered up and nearly impossible to beat, but you just need to lure him away…but with your stubbornness…" Zhou Yu trailed off; he'd engage the guy in battle and be crushed. "No, no, I'll find some other way. Sorry."

"What! No, if you're that worried I'll take Ling Tong, c'mon Zhou Yu…?"

Perfect. "But his guard will still be up; you'll have to find some way to distract him with something other than bells and whistles…"

Zhou Yu and Gan Ning stayed in silence trying to formulate a fool proof plan, moments past before Gan Ning's bells clanked together and Zhou Yu picked up on Gan Ning's sudden mischievous expression.

"No, whatever you are thinking, no."

"Oh c'mon, I need to get Ling Tong back for the last time when he made a fool of me…and trust me it'll work."

xxx

"Excuse me?" Ling Tong's bewildered look brought immediate amusement to Gan Ning's face. "Since when was he qualified to come up with a strategy? And when did you lose your mind?"

"Look," Gan Ning stepped in. "This will work, but only if one of us makes the sacrifice and honestly, no one would believe me."

"Zhou Yu! You cannot be serious, did he bribe you? Threaten you with something?"

Zhou Yu looked between the two of them, suddenly regretting coming in between the two…after all this was certain to widen the gap between them. But Gan Ning had a valid argument, who as a member of the male gender, he could appreciate and see the brilliance of it.

"This…is the only thing…mostly guaranteed to work…I'm sorry Ling Tong," He quickly departed from the scene, exhaling from relief as soon as he rounded the corner, Gan Ning's amused laugh following him, Ling Tong too appalled by the two of them to even attempt to shut him up.

xxx

"There's no way I'm doing this."

"Oh c'mon, stop whining, and get in the damn thing."

"Who invited you to help anyway!"

"All you have to do is slip it on, c'mon."

Ling Tong glared, before reaching out and snatching the fabric from Gan Ning, already plotting his revenge. Zhou Yu demanded he do this, and Gan Ning hadn't let him forget it for a second what was coming next.

"You can't let your other clothes show…here."

"What are you doing? Stop that!" Ling Tong tugged himself away with more force than necessary and found himself staring up at Gan Ning's amused expression. "Shut up."

"You're getting it dirty."

"It's your fault!"

"No self respecting guy is gonna go for you…"

"I'm so worried."

Gan Ning bent down and pulled Ling Tong up off the ground, looking him up and down. Gan Ning sighed and leaned back with his arms behind his head, making Ling Tong suddenly feel more self conscious.

"Luckily, I called in an expert."

"What? You told someone!"

"You didn't think this was a secret did you?" Gan Ning winked at him, jumping back as Ling Tong lunged for him.

"I'll kill you!"

"That's not very lady like," A giggle came from behind Ling Tong, he buried his face in his hands.

He parted his fingers staring down at Da Qiao, who giggled again before catching his glare and silencing herself. She looked him over, studying him, it worried him. He wasn't even entirely certain what he looked like as he turned in a circle for her, at her command, but he was sure he'd never live it down.

"Well, you won't get a boyfriend dressed like that," She muttered, and Gan Ning agreed from behind her.

"I'm not looking for a date! I just need this stupid dress to pass me off."

Da Qiao giggled again, before a determined look crossed her face, and suddenly she was tugging at him everywhere, pushing him around like a doll. A girl doll. He winced as Gan Ning watched in amusement, and maybe a spark of amazement. Da Qiao stepped back to admire her handy work.

"Well your hair is already up, so…" She tugged a flower out of her hair, Ling Tong stepped back defensively shaking his head. "It'll complete the look!"

"No! A dress is bad enough! Don't mess with my hair!"

"Look he even sounds like a girl," Gan Ning waved towards him.

"If you don't let me put the flower in, I'll have to use force!"

Ling Tong winced, but willingly allowed the flower to be planted in his hair. After all of this, he wasn't even sure he could even fight in the outfit. It was best not to resist Da Qiao anyway. She stepped back admiring again, while Gan Ning looked at him in a way that made him uncomfortable.

"Ya know, I knew he was girly looking, but damn…" Ling Tong shifted uncomfortably.

"Can we just get this over with?"

xxx

Gan Ning watched from his hidden position in a tree, as Ling Tong awkwardly moved towards the guard, Lu Meng was hidden around there too, watching. He tried not to laugh himself out of the tree watching Ling Tong trying to entice the guard, who, Gan Ning noted, must be dumb as a sack of bricks, considering it actually looked like Ling Tong was turning him on. Personally he expected the plan to be a failure, and he'd have to go in and save the idiot, but thanks to Da Qiao, it was actually working. Even Gan Ning kinda fell for it. He watched eagerly as Ling Tong grabbed a hold of the guard's hand tugging him off in the direction of the tree. He wished he was closer so he could of heard what things Ling Tong came up with to lure the guard away, who had shouted back at his soldiers to maintain their posts.

"Poor guy…" Gan Ning grinned; Wei would never let this guard hear the end of it. Just like he planned to never let Ling Tong hear the end of it.

He could just hear the rumors now, not only would Wei know all about Ling Tong's secret cross-dressing, plan, they'd be unable to predict Wu's next move. All thanks to him, not that he was gloating about it…much. He watched the two approaching, he grinned, the surprise attack didn't have to happen immediately.

xxx

Ling Tong stepped back away from the guard, bumping into the tree, the things he said he'd do probably didn't give him a gold star in lady likeness. He glanced up, waiting for Gan Ning to do anything; slowly it became apparent nothing was going to happen until Ling Tong satisfied Gan Ning's need for revenge. As if the dress wasn't enough.

"Hey sweetheart, I didn't catch your name," Ling Tong blushed furiously hiding his face.

"It-it's not important!" He kept staring at the ground hoping the man stayed far away from him, and had hopefully forgotten everything Ling Tong had promised him—or at very least hoped he didn't mention it within earshot of Gan Ning.

"Alright then…" The guy shrugged it off, his mind clearly on other things. "So about those things you mentioned…"

Ling Tong jumped up placing a hand over the general's mouth, trying to be inconspicuous about it all. The general wound his hand around Ling Tong's wrist, tugging his hand away.

"Done talking are we?" Ling Tong's eyes widened as the general pushed him against the tree. Moving closer to him, he suddenly regretted everything about that day, he should have just feigned sick.

"I'd say we were," Ling Tong exhaled in relief from the sound of Gan Ning's voice.

He watched Gan Ning jump down out of the tree, landing as gracefully as a pirate could, before doing the only thing he could think to do while he was tied up by the dress and weaponless. Wincing as his knee connected with the general's body feeling the pain in his own body, he slipped backwards free from the guy's grip.

"Sorry!" He muttered before Gan Ning engaged in battle with the newly defenseless general.

He stayed out of the way, briefly acknowledging that Lu Meng slipped in the base during the commotion. He tugged at the edges of his dress, uncomfortable with how short it was on him, probably another point in Gan Ning's victory. He sighed as Gan Ning dealt the final blow, grinning over at Ling Tong.

"So how's playing the damsel in distress working out?" He walked over to where Ling Tong had safely retreated. "I just saved you."

"….my hero…" Ling Tong glowered.

Gan Ning laughed briefly before calling his horse.

"So…what did you 'mention'?"

Ling Tong raised an eyebrow contemplating, the look on Gan Ning's face would be priceless, but it would be awkward explaining it to people for the next week and a half that it wasn't true. He shrugged deciding he should have some entertainment out of all of this. He pulled himself up to Gan Ning's ear to whisper what he told the general. Slowly confusion overtook Gan Ning's expression, and that uncomfortable look he gave Ling Tong earlier that day.

"Can you really do that?" He asked, nearly sounding hopeful.

"You'll never find out."

"Oh c'mon! That's not fair!"

Ling Tong glanced towards Gan Ning's horse. "Is this the part where you whisk me off into the sunset?"