Disclaimer- I do not own RFR, obviously.
This is the first fic I've ever posted here, or completed (which is probably because it's a one shot) to be honest. Feedback= much appreciated. Since I'm new to this whole making-my-fics-public-for-anyone-to-read biz, I don't want you to flame me because flames suck a lot. The song is just a little thing I wrote when I was bored, and it inspired me to write the fic. Sorry it's not in song *format*, but I couldn't get the HTML to work. I just thought that would be a really interesting thing for you to know.
"Lily, I have something important to tell you."
She remembered every detail so well, though she couldn't say she wanted to. Ray had asked her to meet him in The Park- the one they had spent so many years, playing, walking, talking. Ray had kissed her for the first time in The Park. It held so many pleasant memories.
They sat down on one of the park benches, and Lily curled up against Ray, resting her head on his chest. She had wanted to tell him something special and important tonight- she had fallen completely, head-over-heels in love with him, Ray Brennan.
"I wanted to tell you something tonight, too, Ray." she took a deep breath and opened her mouth, but Ray interrupted her.
"Look Lily, what I have to say is really important, so if you could just let me go first-" Ray had said softly. Lily smiled inwardly. Ray never really did seem to care whether he was polite or not. She wouldn't call him tactless, oh no, but he had a way with saying what he needed to say, no matter how he got it out.
"What is it, Ray?" Lily looked up into his brown eyes. She could tell by the seriousness and uncomfortable edge in his tone- this really was important. It wasn't like Ray to be serious, and he seemed to be the more comfortable with himself than anyone she'd met, with the exception of Travis, though his being on a different level than Ray's. It made Lily nervous to witness this seldom seen side of Ray.
"Lily," Ray closed his eyes. "Lily, I love you. I love everything about you. I love your smile, I love your eyes, I love the way you smell and the way you're so open about how you feel." Lily couldn't help but give him a modest smile. "But-" But? But what? Lily's heart started to race. She watched television and seen movies, and every tragic heartbreak followed "But". No. No, this wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening- "But I'm not in love with you."
And Lily's heart stopped. The sound of a window shattering filled her mind, and Lily Randall could not breathe. Over.
~*~
Anger. Red, powerful, encompassing anger filled her body and mind.
She couldn't help but think of how she wanted to hurt Ray Brennan worse than ever before. A knife, or a gun, and her alone in a room with him just long enough to get the job done. She would hurt him, she would kill him, she would make him understand her pain-
And yet, she couldn't. She could never hurt Ray.
I'm more tired than I've ever been before. My head aches and my limbs are sore. The nights are short and the days are long. I wish I wasn't writing this song.
I was supposed to love you forever. We were meant to be together. Shatter my heart so We will cease. Let this razor blade be my release.
Lily put her pen down, inspecting her razor carefully. She had cut herself by accident many times, but she had never hurt herself intentionally. Slowly and carefully, she slit her wrist.
If she couldn't hurt Ray Brennan, she could at least hurt herself.
This is the first fic I've ever posted here, or completed (which is probably because it's a one shot) to be honest. Feedback= much appreciated. Since I'm new to this whole making-my-fics-public-for-anyone-to-read biz, I don't want you to flame me because flames suck a lot. The song is just a little thing I wrote when I was bored, and it inspired me to write the fic. Sorry it's not in song *format*, but I couldn't get the HTML to work. I just thought that would be a really interesting thing for you to know.
"Lily, I have something important to tell you."
She remembered every detail so well, though she couldn't say she wanted to. Ray had asked her to meet him in The Park- the one they had spent so many years, playing, walking, talking. Ray had kissed her for the first time in The Park. It held so many pleasant memories.
They sat down on one of the park benches, and Lily curled up against Ray, resting her head on his chest. She had wanted to tell him something special and important tonight- she had fallen completely, head-over-heels in love with him, Ray Brennan.
"I wanted to tell you something tonight, too, Ray." she took a deep breath and opened her mouth, but Ray interrupted her.
"Look Lily, what I have to say is really important, so if you could just let me go first-" Ray had said softly. Lily smiled inwardly. Ray never really did seem to care whether he was polite or not. She wouldn't call him tactless, oh no, but he had a way with saying what he needed to say, no matter how he got it out.
"What is it, Ray?" Lily looked up into his brown eyes. She could tell by the seriousness and uncomfortable edge in his tone- this really was important. It wasn't like Ray to be serious, and he seemed to be the more comfortable with himself than anyone she'd met, with the exception of Travis, though his being on a different level than Ray's. It made Lily nervous to witness this seldom seen side of Ray.
"Lily," Ray closed his eyes. "Lily, I love you. I love everything about you. I love your smile, I love your eyes, I love the way you smell and the way you're so open about how you feel." Lily couldn't help but give him a modest smile. "But-" But? But what? Lily's heart started to race. She watched television and seen movies, and every tragic heartbreak followed "But". No. No, this wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening- "But I'm not in love with you."
And Lily's heart stopped. The sound of a window shattering filled her mind, and Lily Randall could not breathe. Over.
~*~
Anger. Red, powerful, encompassing anger filled her body and mind.
She couldn't help but think of how she wanted to hurt Ray Brennan worse than ever before. A knife, or a gun, and her alone in a room with him just long enough to get the job done. She would hurt him, she would kill him, she would make him understand her pain-
And yet, she couldn't. She could never hurt Ray.
I'm more tired than I've ever been before. My head aches and my limbs are sore. The nights are short and the days are long. I wish I wasn't writing this song.
I was supposed to love you forever. We were meant to be together. Shatter my heart so We will cease. Let this razor blade be my release.
Lily put her pen down, inspecting her razor carefully. She had cut herself by accident many times, but she had never hurt herself intentionally. Slowly and carefully, she slit her wrist.
If she couldn't hurt Ray Brennan, she could at least hurt herself.