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(Prologue and Chapter 1)
POWER WARNERS: THE MOVIE
Prologue
Author's note: the following appears against a starry background with the words scrolling upwards.
Centuries ago, an interdimensional being known as Zordon came to the city of Angel Grove and created a super-human fighting force to aid him in his never-ending struggle against evil. But that is a different story, one that this story is a parody of. It, too, started centuries ago when another interdimensional being known as Dr. Otto Scratchansniff came to the city of Burbank to become a psychiatrist for Warner Bros. Studios. When it became clear that the world was in danger from the forces of evil, and with the aid of his trusted assistant, Hello Nurse 5, he sought out three extraordinarily zany teenagers and gave them the power to transform into a super-human fighting force. In times of great need, the wacky young warriors could use their powers to summon, or transform selected objects, such as the Warner Bros. Studios water tower, into, colossal assault vehicles known as zords (in the story about Zordon). Although the identity of three wasn't much of a secret, no one knew who they were even after the forces of evil had long since been defeated.
That all changed when the forces of evil returned, and three children, known as the Warner brothers (and the Warner sister), who had been imprisoned in the water tower, escaped…
Animaniacs presents:
POWER~WARNERS
|THE MOVIE|
Author's note: Before I continue the story, I want to describe to you, the readers, the logo scene in detail so that you have a better idea of what is going on and visualize how the logo appears and disappears. After the prologue/introduction, a bolt of what appears to be real lightning flashes across the starry background and the logo appears. We see the Warners approach the logo (you can either visualize them wearing spacesuits and floating in space, or you can visualize them walking towards the logo as if the starry background was really a sound stage), carrying a detonator and some explosive charges. They attach the charges to the logo and connect them to the detonator via electrical cables. Then the Warners gather together, and the three of them simultaneously activate the detonator. Electrical sparks shoot out around the logo, and then suddenly it explodes. As the dust and smoke clears, the scene changes and we see a plane go flying by. Well, there you have it, and now the story continues…
High above, in the sky over the city of Burbank (and Warner Bros. Studios), a propeller plane is flying. Its destination unknown to those on the ground who are watching it, but it appears to be no ordinary propeller plane.
"Woo-hoo!" says a voice inside the plane.
The voice is apparently coming from Wakko Warner. He and his siblings, Yakko and Dot, are inside the propeller plane which is apparently intended to be used for skydiving because the Warners are now wearing skydiving suits. Yakko is wearing blue, Wakko is wearing red, and Dot is wearing yellow.
"Come on! We're outta here!" Wakko says excitedly.
"Easy, Wakko," says Dot, trying to calm Wakko down.
"Okay, sibs, we're fifteen seconds from the drop zone," Yakko informs them.
Yakko's statement would imply that the Warners are getting ready to jump out of the plane. As to why they were doing this, we can only assume that it is another attempt to evade capture by Warner Bros. Studio Security Guard Ralph. And speaking of Ralph… Unknown to the Warners (at least until the moment he speaks), Ralph had somehow managed to stowaway onto the plane that the Warners were preparing to jump out of.
"Oh no youz kids don't!" warned Ralph as he made himself known to the Warners.
Surprised at the sound of his voice, the Warners jump up a bit and cry, "Yipe!"
Then Yakko says, "Oh, hey, Ralph. Look we'd love to stay and chat, but we have a plane to jump out of. But if you're going to follow us, you might want to slip one of those on." Yakko, then, points to the extra parachutes lying on the floor of the plane.
Ralph thinks about that for moment and, then, says, "Good idea." Then, he proceeds to put on one of the extra parachutes.
"Five seconds!" Wakko says suddenly.
"Dot, you're up!" Yakko informs her.
"Yes!" Dot says as she opens up the door to the plane. Then she jumps out of the plane while yelling a hilarious battle cry. Yakko and Wakko follow her one at a time, doing the same thing that she does with Wakko being the first one to jump after her.
Before Yakko jumps, since he is the last one of the Warners to jump, he turns to Ralph and says, "Catch us on the flip side... if you can!"
Suddenly, at that moment, Ralph realizes that instead of struggling to get the parachute on, he should be catching the Warners before they escape. Only he is too late because just as Ralph is lunging towards the door, Yakko jumps out of the plane.
Ralph watches, dismayed, as the Warners fall away from the plane, through the sky, and out of sight. He gets ready to follow them, but, looking wide-eyed at how far away the ground is, he chickens out at the last minute, and says, "That's alotta air."
As the Warners fall (or fly, with them who knows) through the sky, they pull off spectacular maneuvers. Most of the maneuvers are obviously intended to be funny because they keep making funny faces as they perform back flips, spins, etc. The Warners pull off more hilarious maneuvers then swoop together, interlocking their hands and forming a triangle (it would be a circle, but there is just the three of them).
"Okay, sibs, it's time to open our parachutes. I don't know about you two, but I don't feel like impersonating road kill, today, so without further adue, let's break!" Yakko says.
With that, the Warners disperse and pull their rip-cords. The sky bursts to life with three blossoming parachutes – one in each of the Warners' respective colors.
Meanwhile, back on terra firma, in Burbank City Park, the real reason why the Warners were jumping out of a plane in the first place is revealed. It would appear that they are participating in a huge fundraiser. There are huge signs and banners everywhere saying "Save the Observatory". Now you would expect that the Warners would participate in something more hilarious, and normally you'd be right, but the Warners do try to teach children the right things, they just do it humorously. This happens to be one of those times, just without the gags. Anyway, if signs and banners weren't enough to tell you that this is approximately where the Warners are going to land, the big red tarp-like plastic bull's-eye representing the target-landing-zone sure will.
Although she is unseen because of the crowd blocking the view of the podium, Slappy Squirrel's voice is heard over the loudspeaker, and she says, "I wouldn't be here right now, but the announcer got knocked out cold by the microphone." The crowd laughs. "Anyway, the hot dogs, cotton candy, soda, and anvils are available at the concession stand." The last part of Slappy's comment about the anvils illicits another laugh from the crowd.
Suddenly, the voice of Slappy's nephew, Skippy Squirrel, shouts out over the crowd's laughter. "Aunt Slappy! Aunt Slappy! They're heere." Skippy says eerily, and he points to the sky.
Then, Slappy announces, "Ladies, gentlemen, and toons, raise your eyes to the sky and lookout 'cause here comes the Warner brothers, Yakko, Wakko, and their sister, Dot."
The crowd looks up to see three colorful rectangles circling randomly in the sky. As the rectangles get closer, the crowd is soon able to identify them as the Warners' parachutes. The parachutes get closer, and soon the crowd is able to make out the blurred figures of the Warners themselves. As the Warners land, Slappy begins identifying them one by one.
"First up is Dot Warner!" Slappy announces, and the crowd cheers as a figure dressed in a yellow skydiving suit lands on the bull's-eye. "Next one we have is Wakko Warner!" The crowd cheers some more as a figure dressed in a red skydiving suit lands on the bull's-eye. "And finally, here comes Yakko Warner!" The crowd then cheers even louder than before, with Skippy Squirrel being the loudest, as a figure dressed in a blue skydiving suit lands on the bull's-eye.
As the Warners begin to gather up their parachutes, the crowd surges forward to congratulate them. "Thanks, everyone! Here, bags of money for everyone!" Yakko says, and then the Warners start tossing bags with $ signs on them to the crowd. Skippy and Slappy approach the Warners to congratulate them personally.
"Congratulations, the observatory now has a new lease on life. And those bags of money sure won't hurt. In fact, look here's the lease right now!" jokes Slappy, and she pulls out a piece of paper that has the words "Lease on Life" written on it. They all laugh.
"Awesome! And just in time for Romy's Comet! It's passing over in two days!" Skippy says excitedly.
"Anyway," says Slappy, "Although the money is good, I was wondering if I could get one of those fat free yogurts."
"Alright, sure! Why not!" Yakko says, and hands Slappy a cup of fat free yogurt.
"Thank you," Slappy says.
"Don't mention it," Yakko replies.
Then Wakko asks, "Hey, has anyone seen Ralph?"
"Well, considering his size, he probably landed on the roof of a doughnut shop," answers Slappy, and the five of them all laugh.
"Anyway, who cares? As long as he is out of our hair for a few hours," Dot says.
"I second that opinion," says Yakko. "But if you're so concerned about Ralph, let's change the scene and find out what's going on."
With that, Yakko suddenly reaches out and grabs the edge of the grass. He then pulls the edge of the grass up (which, as it turns out, is really the edge of the current scene) and lifts it over everyone's heads, and then the scene changes back to that of the plane in the sky.
Speaking of Ralph… again. Inside the propeller plane, Ralph murmurs incomprehensibly as he tries to psyche himself up and jump after the Warners. The pilot says, "Hey, you'd better hurry up and jump. We're running low on fuel." Ralph psyches himself up some more and then jumps out of the open door of the plane. He screams as he flies (or falls) away from the plane.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I wants my mommy! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Ralph cries, and he screams some more and continues screaming as he spins uncontrollably out of view.
The ground seems to be moving really fast all of a sudden. That's because the Warners are on rollerblades, racing through Burbank City Park on their way back to Warner Bros. Studios which, as it would turn out, is only a couple of blocks from the park. Now normally this probably would not be the case as those who are very familiar with the city of Burbank would know. But this is the Warners (and their version of Burbank) we're talking about here, people!
Anyway, a monorail, with the horn momentarily blaring, passes the Warners overhead as they continue on through the park.
"Where did the monorail come from?" asks Yakko. "Did we take a wrong turn and wind up at Disneyland in Anaheim?"
"No, I think that the studio is borrowing it from Sydney, Australia," says Dot.
The Warners continue on through the park. Soon they come upon a flight of stairs near the end of the park. They keep going, and, instead of slowing down, they rollerblade down the steps several times (as if there was more than one of each of them), doing inhumanly possible stunts as they go.
"Let's take a shortcut!" Wakko says excitedly as the Warners glide around a street corner and come upon a construction site.
Yakko leads them up to a plywood ramp. They each launch off of it and leap ten feet into the air. The Warners land in the construction site's parking lot and skate towards the exit, the entrance to the Warner Bros. Studio Lot is in sight and only a short block away.
As the Warners skate out of the construction site, Studio Security Guard Ralph slowly comes in for a landing from his parachuting jump not far from where several construction workers are working. He sees the Warners leaving and tries to reach his whistle, but instead he winds up getting tangled in the lines to his parachute.
"Awww, shoot! There's those kids, and they's gettin' away!" Ralph grumbles.
"HEY!" a voice suddenly shouts out.
Ralph looks up and sees that he has been spotted by the construction site foreman.
"Who are you?" demands the foreman as he moves closer to Ralph's location.
"Uh... I is the... uh... the building inspector..." Ralph exclaims, clearly lying. The foreman gives him a puzzled look. Ralph continues and says, "... uh... Yeah! And yous gots to move that building cuz it suppose to be over theres!" Ralph points in the opposite direction of where the building is actually being constructed at.
As if on cue, the foreman is saved by the bell (sort of) when one of his workers whistles a signal to him. "You ought to come take a look at this," the worker calls. Having been called away by the worker, the foreman takes the opportunity to escape Ralph's attempts to interogate him.
"At last, now's my chance to get out of heres and go after those kids," Ralph says, relieved. Then his stomach suddenly growls, and he says, "And gets me something to eat, I's hungry."
After having been called away (and "rescued") by the worker, the foreman makes his way up to the construction worker who had called him. When he gets there, he sees several other construction workers gathered around something half buried in the ground. The other workers move out of the foreman's way so that he can get a better look at the mysterious object. He sees that his workers have unearthed a large metal plate (most likely made of iron because of rusty spots all over the surface of it). The metal plate looks like a sewer cover except it appeares to be very old and has a monstrously hideous and very ancient looking face carved into it.
"What is it?" some of the other workers whisper.
"What do you think it is?" the first construction worker asks.
"I don't know, but it sure ain't no DWP," the foreman replies. He stares at it a moment longer, and then he says, "Alright, let's get a crane in here!"
A short time later, after a crane is brought in, the construction workers attach heavy lifting cables to the metal plate. The cables are then hooked onto the crane hook. After the workers move out of the way, the foreman gives an all clear signal to the crane operator who then begins to use the crane to lift up the metal plate. When the plate is lifted, it gives more resistance than it should, implying that it was somehow vacuum-sealed into place which, given it's approximate age, should be nearly impossible. The plate only resists for a few seconds before giving way. As soon as it gives way, there's a loud whistling sound followed by a densely thick cloud of purple steam which pours out from behind the plate as it's lifted. The plate is then set aside on the ground as the cloud of purple steam continues to billow out of a large gaping hole where the plate used to be. Seconds later, there is a quiet rumbling sound, and, suddenly, enshrouded by the cloud of purple steam, a large object rises out of the hole in the ground. The cloud of purple steam soon begins to disperse, revealing a menacing stone and metal claw which is cradling what appears to be a huge egg-shaped sarcophagus. The "egg" appears to be made of some sort of purple jade-like substance, whereas the claw appears to be made of some unknown type of metal combined with ordinary stone. As though drawn by it's power, the first construction worker moves closer to the "egg" and reaches out to touch it. Suddenly, purple-colored sparks of electricity begin encircling the "egg" before seizing the worker by his arm.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" the worker cries as he gets zapped and shocked.
There's an explosive blast of thunder, and the worker gets thrown through the air to the ground several feet away. A few purple sparks are still encompassing him when he lands on the ground. The foreman and the other workers rush to his aid, asking if he is okay. But he doesn't respond. When they get close, they see that he is unconscious and therefore unable to respond. Everyone looks back at the "egg" with worry and concern (and maybe a little fear mixed in, too), realizing that it is very much a danger to everyone who tries to get close to it.
TO BE CONTINUED... (in Chapter 2)