Fight Worth Fighting

Winking Tiger                February 10, 2002

E-mail: Mblab6@aol.com

Author's Note: I'm not completely sure why I even wrote this, or where the idea even really came from-it just kind of wrote it itself, temporarily taking my fingers hostage.  But the thought came across my mind, and through my fingers, and *poof* onto my computer.  But I must warn: This hasn't been beta'ed.  I wrote this, looked it over, used the handy dandy spell check, and posted it.

I've got no plans on writing more to this, if I do, it'd only be because of enough demand (reviews or e-mails).  And even then it'd probably be a completely different take on HL-I'm one, usually, for sappy endings. 

Spoilers/Time frame: Harbor Lights

Disclaimer: I own just about nothing, only Andrew, Anna, and Lauren.

A tall, dark, figure walked down the dilapidated halls.  Making his way through, ignoring all those around him, and completely unaware of what he was surrounded by.

From the unknown crowd, a voice spoke.  "You okay?"

"Yeah"

"What'cha here for?"

"Huh?"

"Who's in here? That ya came to see?"

"Oh. Yeah, my wife."  The words slid past his lips without any hesitation.  Either out of truth, or just simply stating the answer to what his mind had heard, without truly thinking about it.

"Oh.  What happened?"

"She got shot, had to go into surgery.  Only all I knew was that she was out.  Got a call while working out saying that she'd been treated here.  Did I know the woman whom I'd been the latest person to page her.  And off I go to the hospital, for her."

"Tough luck."

"Yeah.  Well, I got to see her right before visiting hours ended."


"Oh, good, then."

A slight nod was all he received as an answer.  The man, instead, continued on his way.

"Hey!  Wait up."

The dark figure continued his pace, only later slowing only a small amount.

After catching up to the stranger, the questions continued.  "You don't seem to happy to have visited her. She not doing good?"

"Oh, no. The doctor said she'll be fine."

"What then? I mean, Dude, come on.  I just meet'cha and you don't look good.  And I ain't blind, or all knowing either."

It took a few moments, but the figure slowed.  He stopped in his tracks, moved to the side of the hallway and faced the other man. The softening that almost occurred quickly faded, and an agitated attitude soon took over, clear in his voice.  "Is this twenty questions or something?"

"Look.  See, we're both here; you look like you could talk to someone.  And I've got nothing better to do.  I'm providing a service here."

"Well, I'm leaving, so then you'll just have to find someone else to provide your services to."  And with that, he abruptly left, continuing on his efforts to leave the hallway, and then the building.

Above the dull noises that could be heard, a voice rang out. "My wife died of cancer.  And then I only had my infant daughter.  And now my little girl has it too."

Once again halting from his onward efforts, the other man spoke. "Excuse me?" 

A soft whisper came, "You might not need to talk, but I do.  Would you … could I talk to you?"

It could have been the stresses of everyday life, the additional brought on by the reason for his visit to the hospital, or even possibly some guilt or kindness.  But the man stopped and scanned the nearby areas.  After finding a waiting room, with a few chairs unoccupied, he motioned for the other man to follow.  Sitting down, and offering the chair beside him, he spoke again.

"I'm sorry."

"I've got no one else.  It was only me and my little girl, after my wife died."

Blues eyes implored the others to continue.  Aware that something had to be spoken, or the other man wouldn't rest.  Finally understanding, he continued. 

"I grew up in this really small town.  Like, Hicksville, USA.  I finally got enough cash to leave, and got the hell away from there-went on my own.  But big cities have it out for small town guys.  Just when I was about ready to pack it in, suck up all that my old buddies would throw at me once I came back, she came.  Out of nowhere I met here.  It all happened so fast, it's a bit blurry.

"She was what kept me there.  I stayed for her.  And she was just perfect.  Finally made her mine, once I could get her a decent ring, and we were … perfect.  For a while."

Before he could continue, he heard the faint oath muttered beneath the other man's breath.  "Perfect is highly over rated."  It strained his ears and his brain to make sure that was, in fact, what he'd heard.  But after a moment, he was sure.

"Huh?"

"What?"  After no response on filling him in, "Keep going, on what you were saying.  Perfect, I believe."

"Wait, you said something about perfect being over rated."

Mild shock crossed the man's face.  But after getting over it, he quickly cooled down, and made some effort on contemplating an answer.  "Well, it's just that ... in my experience, perfect things aren't nearly as perfect as they're supposed to be.  Even if they are, they sure don't last as long as something perfect should.  But wait.  If we're getting so personal, I might as well know your name.  Which is what?"

"Oh."  Quickly handing his arm, "I'm Andrew."

"Hi Andrew."

"Hey.  You are?"

"I'm still wanting to know the rest of your story."

"Well, we were perfect; for a while.  Lived like the perfect couple.  We had a few really great years.  And then, we found out that we were gonna have a kid.  In the world we're in, we weren't too sure.  But, anything like that from my Lauren, my wife, would be a miracle.  And a few months later we were two first time parents have no clue in hell what to do with our baby.

"We tried the best we could.  But after a while, Lauren just got really tired.  I thought it was just from everything, having Anna.  Maybe from taking care of her, with me, all the long hours we put in to everything, just everything.  But she didn't get better, no matter how much I made her sleep, or try to relax.  And after taking her to a doc, we found out.  She had cancer. 

"There was nothing we could do.  And soon, I'd lost the love of my life, and was the sole supporter of my Anna."

"How long ago was this?"

Ignoring the question, as if not hearing at all, he went on.  "And then, a few weeks ago, the same thing happened to Anna.  I was terrified.  I took her to a doc, praying that it wasn't the same.  But it was.  Only this time, I'm trying everything there is.  I'm not loosing her.  I'm not loosing her too."

"Good luck."

Finally out of his spell, Andrew heard the other man's comments.  "Thanks."

"She'll be fine.  It'll work out."

"Really?"

"I'm not a doctor, but I know this.  If you put your heart into something, you've at least got your passion going for it."  Quietly, as if not to be heard, but only to be spoken, "Even if nothing else is.  It's all you've got-it's something."

"I know she will.  I know."

"Then that's all there is."

A long silence soon followed.  But soon, after recovering from the emotional outburst, curiosity took over.  "What about you?  You never told me, what's wrong with you?"

"We'd fought, before she left, and got shot.  Things weren't too good between us."

"Oh."

"My wife's … unusual, not like everyone.  We've been through so much, but … she never seems to give herself enough credit to handle things.  It's always her; I'm not the best either.

"But, we met … in a very unusual manner, and nothing since then has been normal or regular.  She grew up in a large foster home.  But they treated her worse than anyone should ever be treated, especially little kids.  But her and some of her brothers and sisters escaped, and tried to make it on their own.  Only they tried to find them, each of them.  She'd been running from them, for years, and had lost all the others.  We met, she helped me with my business and I helped her-find the others.

"We danced around each other, for a year.  An entire year.  And when we finally stopped dancing, and admitted to each other that we really cared.  We had a little time of … heaven.

"But then, when we had enough … we had enough to punish the people that'd treated her the way they did when she was little, things went bad.  Everything had been going fine, but … she got hurt.  I saw her, I held her in my arms as the life drained out of her.  I wouldn't leave her, I couldn't.  They had to sedate me to get me to leave, without her.  But somehow, they found her, and took her again-and saved her.

"She was tortured again, by them.  But she was able to get away from them, again.  And she came back, to me.  She came back to me - after all that time - she came back to me.  But things had changed.  And we weren't the same.  We haven't been for a while.  And we almost had our heaven again, for just a short time.  But it taken from us again, and we both know that we won't get that again any time soon, if at all. 

"So things have been … odd with us.  But then, she left, maybe just for the day, to go think, and then what happened happens.  She tries to save a kid, and gets shot instead.

"I go in, once I find her.  And all I can think of is what happened those months ago, when she … when something very similar happened.  And all I can do is hope, when I know she's already lost what little of what she had left, that she'll be okay, and so will we.

"Only I go in there, and all I leave with is the feeling of being defeated, again."

"Wow.  But man, you've got hope still, right?"

"I'm not sure.  There may be nothing to hope for, anymore."

"Sure there is.  You love her, right?"

"With all my heart.  But it's hearting real hard to love her right now."

"But she needs you, and your love.  She needs that."

"I don't know."

"She needs you, and your love, and your hope.  That's all she's got, that's all you've got going.  But it's your something man, take it, use it."

"Maybe.  Maybe."

"Visiting time's over.  You come back tomorrow, and you go see your girl."

"I will, I think.  It's the right thing.  I always do the right thing."

"Of course it is, and you're gonna do it."

"Yeah, and you don't give up on your Anna, either."

"I won't.  And you won't give up on your … on your … wait.  I never got you or your wife's name."

"Oh.  She's Max, and I'm Logan."

"Right.  You don't give up on your Max, Logan.  And I won't give up on my Anna."

"Never."

With a shared smile, both got up from their seats.

"It was nice talking to you Andrew.  You're a nice guy."

"You are too.  I really hope things work out for you, and maybe I'll see you around.  Never know, always nice to have some good friends around."

"Yeah, always nice."

Together they walked the rest of the hallway.  At a set of sealed double doors, Andrew made his exit, with a quick good bye and a quick wave.

Logan continued on his way out, into the parking lot, and into his car.

Suddenly, there seemed to be a little bit more to have hope in.  If all they'd have was that, it was still something.  And it was a something that he'd never stop having, no matter how much he might or might not want to do.