Title: Stars Did Wander Darkling
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, vignette
Timeframe: Post Dark Empire
Characters: Luke Skywalker, Mara Jade
Summary: The sun was extinguish'd and the stars did wander darkling in the eternal space.
A/N: The title is from the poem by Lord Byron. Written October 2011.
Luke stood in the middle of the training room, eyes closed as the practice drone circled around him. His lightsaber was drawn, its green glow casting deep shadows across his face. He was still momentarily, his sole focus on the practice drone, the quiet hum of his lightsaber the only sound as it reverberated off the walls.
And then suddenly, he sprang to life. Eyes still closed, he swung his lightsaber just as the drone activated, the sweep of the blade easily intercepting the blaster bolts. The drone danced around him and Luke, eyes still closed, anticipated its every move. He parried and thrust, as if fighting a real opponent, his feet moving gracefully across the floor in even steps, pivots and turns.
Mara watched from the doorway of the training room, her eyes lingering on his form. His lightsaber technique was not as polished or precise as hers, but his instincts were better. Mara fought with lightning-fast reflexes, whereas Luke seemed to know his opponent's next action before they even performed it. Even when sparring with a practice drone, it was clear that he understood the art much better than she did. Mara fought with a lightsaber; Luke fought with the Force.
He was wearing a tight, sleeveless shirt, which she surmised was actually the shirt he usually wore underneath his flight suit. Mara studied the strong arms, usually kept hidden underneath heavy tunics or robes, which were now revealed. She watched the muscles move underneath taut skin, flexing as he swung his lightsaber, tensing as he drew it back. Luke was deceptively slight; shorter than the average, his lean form never on display unless he thought he was alone. It made his opponents underestimate him – for more than capable strength was hidden beneath and defied his compact body type. She had never before considered that it was a particularly apt description of Skywalker himself; power and darkness hidden beneath a genial and deceptively simple exterior.
It had been three months since Byss. It was the first time Mara had seen him, although she had heard the entire story from numerous sources. Watching him from the doorway of the practice room, unobserved for the time being, she looked again. This time Mara saw how the lightsaber glow accentuated the dark circles under his eyes; that his skin was pale and sallow; that his lean muscles gave the appearance of one who did not eat, but exercised constantly. All comfort and care had been stripped away from his very body, leaving only a hard exterior; taut skin stretched over worked muscles, with no cushioning there-between.
It was almost as if the humanity had been worked out of him; the perfect human frame surrounding an empty soul.
And more than that, she felt the darkness which permeated him. It was thick in the air all around him, within him; she could almost taste it in the air. Such an old feeling and familiar presence, it made Mara feel ill, as if it was somehow infecting her just being in the same room with him.
There was a snap-hiss as Luke's lightsaber deactivated – the session was over. Mara felt she should withdraw, but it was too late. Luke's eyes had opened and he had seen her, his impassive face breaking into a smile.
"Mara," he greeted her, clipping his lightsaber to his belt. "It's good to see you."
"Just a supply run," Mara told him brusquely, anxious to extract herself from his presence. "The usual shipment – I'll expect the credits to be transferred within three days as usual."
"Wait, don't go," Luke called to her, even as she turned to exit the room. "You've come all this way, why don't you stay a while?"
His friendliness unnerved her, even more than usual. In the past his openness and warmth had made her uncomfortable simply because she was not used to such behaviour. But now the taint of the Dark Side within him made his manner seem calculated and false. She had fallen for such lies and flattery once before.
"I can't," she replied in a clipped tone.
"Not even for a quick spar?" he asked, his smile inviting. "I don't mind telling you that I miss having a good partner."
"No, Luke."
His looked at her quizzically for the unusual use of his given name. "What's wrong?"
She looked him in the eyes. "You," she told him simply. "You are, Skywalker. A few months ago the reborn Emperor nearly plunged the galaxy into chaos, again, and you're pretending as if nothing has happened."
Luke seemed taken aback, but covered his surprise with indifference. "There's always some new threat, some Imperial Warlord, or civil war, or new destructive superweapon," he said quietly. "These are our lives, Mara – we don't have the luxury of dwelling on the past."
"This wasn't some power-hungry Imperial nobody stirring up trouble," she shot back. "This was him."
"I know that." Luke's eyes were steel. "I also know you weren't there. I've decided to move on," he added after a pause.
"Just like that?" Mara was incredulous. "You don't just dust yourself off and get on with your life after something like that, Skywalker. Believe me, I know."
"Drop it, Mara." He turned away from her, moving to the far bench and pick up a towel to dry himself off.
"You're the one who asked," she advanced on him slightly, suddenly riled up. "You may be able to fool the rest of the galaxy that it was just some blip on your radar, but you can't fool me." He turned back to her, chin raised slightly in defiance. But she pressed on. "I can feel it on you."
The darkness shrouded him, clung to him like raindrops after a storm. She could smell it on him, bitter and dank, just beneath his carefully maintained barriers. It simmered around the edges of him, like light around a closed door, waiting to be opened and released.
He stepped towards her, and reached to touch her shoulder. She unconsciously flinched, and he pulled away as if burnt, true shock clearly registering on his face.
"You're afraid," he said disbelievingly, his eyes wide. "Why are you afraid of me?" he asked, a note of pain in his voice.
She looked away and was silent for several moments, trying to formulate her words. She didn't want to wound him, but perhaps she was the only one who could tell him the truth. She'd thought once, that he was impervious and infallible, he had been the light which had brought her back from the darkness, had given her the courage to break her servitude. Perhaps it had been unfair to put him on such a pedestal, but he had encouraged her to do so. Although he had never spoken the words, his actions had screamed be like me. The Jedi who had defied Palpatine and refused to give in to the Dark Side led by example. And yet the example was flawed and therefore the lesson invalidated.
"Because you're dangerous, Skywalker," she finally answered in an even tone. "And you don't realise it. You wield the power of the Force with such recklessness, and you don't understand just how damaging that can be." She shook her head slightly, her fears and anxiety rising to the fore. "If you were to fall, if the Dark Side were to take you, it would be the end of us all."
The truth which she did not verbalise, was what chance would anyone else have – would she have - at resisting evil if Luke Skywalker could not?
"You have the power to slaughter thousands with a single thought," she continued regardless. "And you don't think about that when you skirt the line between darkness and light, and if it took you, you couldn't control it." She looked him directly in the eyes. "Every person in this galaxy has a reason to be afraid of you."
Luke stared back at her with no expression, although a muscle in his cheek twitched. Eventually he looked away, and nodded slightly. "Point taken" he said with a hitch in his voice. He turned from her, the muscles in his back tensed. He knew everything she had told him, Mara realised, he just hadn't wanted to admit it to himself, had believed that if he simply kept going it would be left behind. She had never seen him so unsure of himself. It was as if his light had been extinguished, and he was wandering blindly through his life unsure of how to find it again.
She didn't want to hurt him, but nor did she know how to comfort him. She stood there, silently, for a few moments, unsure of whether to leave. Eventually, Luke solved the dilemma for her.
"As much as I love being lectured, Mara, didn't you say you had to go?" There was no humour in his tone.
Mara nodded, once, in response, before turning on her heel and heading towards the exit. She hesitated in the doorway, and turned back to him. "Palpatine was afraid of you," she told him.
Luke turned and looked at her, eyes narrowed, but did not speak.
"I heard him say once, to his personal guard, that you were pure Force energy," she continued. "That's why he needed to badly to turn you – he needed to corrupt it, because otherwise you were too much of a threat. Vader, he could control through his anger, through his physical dependency – he had no such control over you. He was afraid, because you could be the Jedi that the old Order could never produce."
Luke bowed his head, and she was unsure of whether the information was comforting to him or not. She continued; "You could be the greatest Force user this galaxy has ever seen, Luke. And that scared Palpatine. I don't think that he ever intended for you to survive to be a threat to him."
"I'm just a man, Mara," he said quietly, without looking up. "That's all."
She nodded. "I know." And she left the room as quietly as she had entered, to leave him to his thoughts, and allow him to cleanse the darkness he now understood dwelled within him, as it did them all.