The Night Before Christmas in the Bizarro World
(Before every one stones me, my sister will post my diary on the Internet if I don't post this.I wrote it on way to much sugar and well I was bred.
Twas the night before Christmas,
and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring not even my spouse.
The stockings were hung
by the chimney with care
In hopes that Santa would
Put something other than coal in there.
The children were sleeping
and spoke not a word
while in there dreams
They flipped each other the bird
Mamma in the bed
on the couch I sat
We just settled our long winters spat.
When out on the lawn
There arose such chatter
I jumped from the couch to here the window shatter
Away to the window I ran like Flash
I peered out and shuddered
and saw heroes clash
The moon shines white as snow
when Superman crashes below.
And what to my frightened eyes should appear
But a ship with eight robotic reindeer
The big huge driver said "bombs away"
I knew in a moment
It must be St Doomsday
More violent than Cougars
His robots the came
He screamed and shouted
and called them by name
"Now Clinton! Now Obama! Now Truman an Wilson.
On Buchanan! On Jackson!
On Van Buren and Nixon.
Bomb the top of the porch to the top of the wall.
Now we my robots we shall
make Superman fall.
A the night went on
all we did was cry
for said the great oracle
Superman will die
So i thought lets fight this war two
So joined me the boys
and we went after St. Doomsday too
And in the twinkling
of bombs on the roof
I heard the stomping and tearing of each robotic hoof
As I turned my head
and was turning around
Down the chimney St. Doomsday came
with a bound
He was dressed in shorts
And boots on each foot
he was tarnished
With an imprint of Superman's boot
A bundle of Joys
Was this merry hack
He looked like a psycho with a military pack
His eyes so evil
His face like a berry
His fire arms like roses
And blood red like a cherry;
He had a troll mouth
Robin had his bow
he got punched in the chin
Robin died from the blow.
As I did gripe
and knocked out a few teeth
And he spoke
and turned his head
like a wraith
He had a broad spikey face and a fit belly
It made you forget the real Santa's jelly
He stared in my mirror quite pleased with himself
I laughed when I saw him
The madness I felt.
with a glare from his eyes an he twisted his head
He soon let me know
I had something to dread.
He said fe words
Exept claaimed
to be straight
As he torched the stockings
And I called him a jerk.
He gave me the finger.
and picked his nose.
And giving a nod
gave Superman his final blows
He ran to his ship
To his robots he did scream
and on they flew
But in the sky he blew with a flane
I destroyed him with my might
"Merry Christmas to all
and to all Doomsdays final light."
(Okay I'm sorry for this evil fic but Chris has my diary. Twins they are trouble.)