Chapter One

Hi, I'm Jackie, and this is the story of the time my little odd job became the best Christmas I've ever had, maybe even the smurfiest.

See, I work for this little outfit called the IDCA. That stands for Inter Dimensional Children's Association. We send kids and teens into the world of books, movies, games, you name it. I'm not very important to the agency, even though I've worked there since my twelfth birthday two years ago, so all I do are various odd jobs. Once I actually had to go into the world of Shrek and be a witch that got killed in a scrap, and another time I had to be some twin earth-bender in avatar, I hated it. My mentor Lucile tells me they only do it 'cause I'm a rookie, and to not take it personally.

I know she's only trying to make me feel better, because her little crush, Ray, has an apprentice who's already got a pretty little set up in the ice age world. I think her name's Suzy or something. She's got a hubby and a fam in that world, last I heard they're all human. Anyway, I always wanted a full-time gig like Suzy, but so far all I got is a dumb job babysitting a bunch of bear-like thingies (Dr. Suess) every once in a while when Oncie has errands to run.

I can't say I don't like it. The whole deal of the job, I mean. I get to do things most kids can only dream of doing, plus I get paid and if I want, eternal life. I get to choose what age I am at all times because of this little crystal do-dad around my neck. Have I mentioned the magic amulets? No? Just one of the many perks of the job, mine's blue and shaped like a crescent moon. The CEO of the agency told me she made my amulet that shape on account of night being my best time. I only met her once, but she knew everything about me. That part was a little creepy, but I got over it real quick.

Well, enough about the job, what about me? Well, I'm a skater, have red hair cut "emo" style, but I always wear a beanie over it. I've got green eyes and I wear huge cool-looking glasses. I wear hoodies, skinny jeans, and I listen to all types of music. I love the beach, I can surf but I prefer half-pipe, and I want to be a photographer. My dad is a hippie, so I call him by his first name. Well, not his first name. His nickname is Don. His real name is Philmore, but he insists on Don. I call him Donnie most of the time. When I first told Donnie about the agency, he asked if I'd gotten into his "medication" but I proved it to him... I didn't do anything bad. Just levitated. Then he asked me if he had more than his regular dosage.

So enough explanation, here's how it all started.

I woke up, stretched, yawned, and sniffed the air. Usually in the morning I smell either Donnie's medication or burning food. Today it was burning food. Donnie must be cooking again I thought, that or he's trying to rewire something. I got out of bed and headed down stairs. "Donnie!" I called, "You're gonna set off the smoke detector!" I opened one of the windows by the couch.

"Good morning to you, too, Jackie." Donnie laughed, sliding a pancake from the skillet to the plate. "Got work today, man?" he asked. Donnie calls almost everyone "man". He even used to call mom "man".

"Yeah," I answered, walking to the other windows near the table. "I'm sure Lucile has something for me to do today." I opened the window and fanned some of the smoke out with a magazine. "You gonna be okay here?" I asked.

"I'm sure I'll be alright, Jack." Donnie told me, "And make sure you call if you're gonna be out late."

"I will," I said, walking out of the room, "and remember, later we're gonna set up the Christmas stuff."

In a manner of minutes I was at IDCA HQ on Planet G. If you've seen Battle Ship, you know what Planet G is. Apparently they slaughtered all the aliens and used the planet for official IDCA biz a long time ago. On my way to the CEO's office (Lucile works there, she's the secretary of planet) (as apposed to secretary of state?) (get it) I saw Ray and Gaylord. Gaylord's one of the Top Nerds of the outfit.

Once I finally made it to Lucile's Office, she commented on my Christmas beanie and shirt. "Girl," She said, "you're the only person I know who can make Christmas clothes look good." Lucile looks like any other secretary; white, acrylic nails, fun outfits, cool glasses, bun hair.

"Thanks yo." I said, sitting down. "So, got any work for me today?"

"Let's see..." Lucile did a little type-and-swipe on her holographic computer. "Oh, here's something." She said.

"What is it?" I asked.

"You could give the Smurfs a home for the holidays. Seems Gargamel flooded their village, and everything got totally screwed up. Eliza, the CEO, told me I should let you have this one." Lucile tossed me a little navy blue box. It was about the size of a ring box, and had a pearly finish.

"What's this?" I asked, fiddling with the box.

"Your own personal blue moon portal. It's portal-able." Lucile started squealing with laughter, and my eyes rolled skyward. "Did ya get it?"

"I got it, Lucy." I grinned, "So how do you use this thing...?" I almost opened the portal-box, but Lucile stopped me.

"Whoa there crazy! Not in my clean office. If you open that thing it'll mess a lot up. Don't ya watch the movies?" it was only then that I realized something I should've realized before... Lucile sounds just like Fran Dresher!

"Okay, okay. I'll just go to the training room. You got a map or something for me?" Lucile threw me a scroll-looking thing, "Will they be expecting me?"

"Papa will."

"Eliza told him my name?"

"Ray did."

I briefly wondered if these guys knew my fangirl love of Smurfs would make me say yes, or if they just assumed I'd take the job 'cause I'm such a doormat. "How will I get back? I mean, I can't just leave the portal open. Gargamel might jump through again, and we all know how that worked out the first time."

"It closes once you're through, then the box ends up on the ground where the portal was." Lucile explained. "Well, enough chatta, go see the Smurfs, honey." Lucile smiled.

"All right, see you later. Don't work too hard, and merry Christmas!" I called over my shoulder.

"Ha! You know I'm a Jew!" Lucile laughed her words. "And I nev-a work." As I left I heard her saying into the phone, "Hi, Midge... Well, I got five people on hold, but I can talk..."