A Took of a Tale

by BlazingSolstitium

When an adventure is put onto paper, the will author takes certain liberty with the facts. Some, for the sake of the parties involved; others for the author's own selfish reasons. For what ever the reasons, this is one of those stories. It is a story that begins in a hole in the ground with a meddling wizard and one particular hobbit who does not want an adventure.

1. An Unexpected Party

All things Hobbit belong to the wonderful mind of Tolkien.

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When an adventure is put down onto paper, sometimes the author will stray from the true of the true event. It may be for their own personal reasons, like making the story more appealing to readers; or to protect the privacy of the parties involved. There are times that it may be for multiple reasons, both selfish and self-less at the same time. Whatever the reason, often times the event the story was written about is sometimes much more interested than what ends up on paper.

Everyone knows the story of a young Hobbit by the name of Bilbo Baggins and his part in the desolation of the dragon Smaug and the Battle of the Five Armies, but no one but those involved knows the real truth of the matter. The truth of it was that Bilbo, though he always regretted his cowardice, never actually took part in the adventure. It was true that there was a hobbit that joined Thorin Oakenshield Company and that the dwarves met up at Bilbo's house with the goal of Bilbo joining them, but the meek Halfling did not join them in the end. In fact, after Gandalf's first visit, Bilbo was called off on very important affairs and was not at home when the dwarves arrived. So instead of Bilbo having to deal with the rambunctious dwarves, it was a very curious hobbit that had been left in charge of Bag End.

This is the true tale of the hobbit and the company of dwarves.

He had a terrible feeling, an absolute terrible foreboding about this wizard business. It was true he had enjoyed the old gray wizard's fireworks when he was just a wee lad but that did not keep a feeling of dread and unease from settling in the pit of his stomach. It was an unpleasant feeling that dulled his appetite. He could not understand why he would have let the wizard practically invite himself over for tea...no, that wasn't completely accurate, for Bilbo had offered to have the wizard over for tea. "Well, he didn't have to go and accept it!" the hobbit huffed as he ran a hand through his curly hair. The wizard knew full well that if he showed up to the hobbit's doorstep, unannounced, that due to the hospitable nature of Halflings would be invited over at a later date for tea so they could catch up. The look in Gandalf's eyes promised mischief and the fact that his glittering eyes were quite focused on Bilbo, the hobbit was quite positive that he would not be home. For a moment, he stared at the small satchel on the table in front of him, his mouth turning down into a small frown, his face twisted in hesitation. This was quite un-hobbit like behavior. It was most rude of him to invite someone over for tea only for the person to come and find no one at home. He let out a tired sigh in defeat as he slowly started unpacking his sack, despite how he dreaded facing the wizard again, Bilbo could not just let the wizard come to an empty house. He stopped his eyes wide as an idea popped into his head and soon a large grin appeared on his face as he let out a happy little laugh. "Hah! That is it! Oh Bilbo, you crafty Hobbit you!" He quickly flitted over to his desk and began scribbling something down on a piece of parchment, a positively giddy expression on his face. "It's so unfortunate," he said in mock disappointment, "that I've been called away for a family emergency and won't be home when the wizard comes." He laughed, "Oh but don't worry Gandalf, there will be someone to play host for you. I have just the hobbit and mind." He chuckled as he slid the letter into an envelope and rushed outside to get sent. He waved down a bored looking boy that seemed to have nothing better to do than dragging a stick along the fence. "You there, lad!" Bilbo cried out excitedly. The young hobbit startled, threw his stick into the long grass, suddenly afraid that he was in trouble. The look of fear on the boy's face caused Bilbo to let out a chuckle, "I'll forgive you for abusing my fence if you run this letter over to my cousin's for me. The post's come already this morning but it is dreadfully important that this reaches my cousin by the day's end. Deliver it faithfully and I'm sure you'll be rewarded handsomely with some tasty sweeties."

Bilbo laughed merrily as the boy snatched the letter with eyes gleaming with the idea of sweets and was off running, letter in hand. Now that the letter well on its way, Bilbo was finally able to sit down and relax for a while. .

It was shortly after lunch time when a cloaked figure arrived at Bilbo's front door. When Bilbo answered, he was greeted with the wide, beaming smile of his cousin, Primose Mirabella Took. Before he could give a proper greeting, his cousin had her arms around his neck, planting excited kisses on each cheek, "Oh Bilbo! I was so happy to get your letter!" she gushed, releasing Bilbo from her hug. "We must sit down and have a bit of tea before you leave! I haven't heard from you in years," her lip stuck out into a pout, "you never visit anymore."

Bilbo laughed and ruffled her hair, "Prim, you haven't changed a bit have you?! Still as wild as ever!"

Prim straightened herself high and looked at her cousin through narrowed eyes, "Well," she said snobbishly, "I have changed quite a bit, thank you very much, dear cousin." She placed her hands on her hips indignantly, "Well, are you going to keep your guest out here on the stoop as if she was some beggar off the streets?"

Bilbo's mouth opened, not sure what to say about his cousin's sudden mood change but managed to force his self to step to the side to let the Took brush past him. She swung her cloak off her shoulders gracefully and hung it up on a hook and looked over her shoulder at her cousin with raised eyebrows, "Well, are you going to just stand there with the door hanging open?" Once Prim turned away from her cousin, she allowed a pleased smile to grace her lips, enjoying the fact that she could throw him off so easily. "Is it a crime to be excited to see my favorite cousin after so many months of neglect from him? I should think not, after all we were such good friends as children."

Stuttering, Bilbo managed to gather his senses and quickly shut the door behind them with an apologetic frown, "My apologies Primose, I didn't mean to upset you. You have grown up since we last met, I can tell that now." He ran a hand through his hair again before inviting her into the salon, "I'll get you some tea." He turned to leave after he saw her sit down in a chair but her bell like laughter made him stop and turn back to her. Her expression made his face go red in embarrassment.

"It's true, I have changed into quite the respectable young lady," she smiled and winked as she stood up, "but I bet I could still beat you in a wrestling match."

A while later, the two sat comfortably together, laughing about their childhood and the years they spent raising hell. They had just finished recalling one of their more ridiculous adventures and Bilbo was trying to stop himself from laughing, "Oh you were a right terror when we were little! I'm surprised your parents let you out at all!"

Prim straightened up in her chair, taking on the same regal aire as before but the corners of her lips were still pulled up in a coy smile, "They did try their hardest to reign me in," she paused, leaning in to her cousin as if she had a secret, " but they forgot one thing?"

Bilbo grinned and leaned in, "What was that?"

Prim broke out to a grin, "I'm Primrose Mirabella Took and no one can ever tame me!" she announced proudly before they both leaned back into their chairs laughing, "It was something they always seemed to forget, they could teach me to be prim and proper but deep inside, I'll always be the little lass with the muddy face beating all the boys at all their silly games."

It was then that Bilbo noticed the time, "Dear me, I must be off!" He got to his feet quickly and went to grab his bag, which was already by the door. Prim followed him, feeling a little sad that he had to leave so soon, but she helped the backpack onto his back and handed him his walking stick. Bilbo turned and gave her a big hug, "Take care of the place for me Prim?"

"Of course, she'll be just how you left her." Prim said solemnly.

Bilbo smiled and nodded as he opened the door, "Help yourself to anything you want, I'll be back a few days. Don't let Gandalf push you around, if he gives you too much trouble feel free to show him the door." They hugged once more and with brief farewell, Bilbo was off, feeling a little guilty for leaving her to deal with his problem.

Primrose sat in the silence of Bag End, taking in all the little details of the woodwork around her. It had been a long time since she had last stepped foot in the place and now that she was there alone, she could take her time and enjoy the splendor of the place. She sighed, her elbow propped on the arm rest of the chair; her fingers lazily playing with her golden curls as her eyes flitted about the cozy room. It was much like her own home, except on a much grander scale. Her hole was pleasant, warm and clean but small and with her family, it seemed over crowded when everyone was home. She honestly didn't mind the hustle and bustle that was home, it made her feel alive and that she was a part of something but that didn't stop her from relishing being in a house on her own. Being a woman without a husband, she was still living with her family and while she had no intention of settling down and marrying any time soon, she did dream of when she had a house of her own. Here, in this big old hole, if Prim closed her eyes, she could imagine that she was sitting in a house of her own, a house that was her's alone. A smile playing on her lips as she took a deep, satisfied sigh.

The afternoon was dwindling and though she wanted to sit and enjoy the silence a little longer, Prim knew Gandalf was expected anytime now so she forced herself up and into the kitchen to start a fresh kettle. While the water boiled, Prim decided to do a little set up and went about making the west facing parlor a little more accommodating for her large guest. She pulled a large chair; one that Prim hoped would be large enough for the old fireworks exhibitioner to be comfortable in. She opened up the little curtains to let the light of the sinking sun and fluffed up the little decorative pillows and wiped off any settling dust from the little shelves and table among the room. She set the nice tea set out onto the little round table on top of a nice lace doily and went and set some of the canister of tea Bilbo kept in his large pantry. Prim let out a laugh seeing all the food Bilbo kept and though she ate a lot herself, she couldn't imagine a single hobbit eating as much as one would have to so this store won't be spoiled. She imagined Bilbo turning into a portly hobbit if he continued to eat as much as it seemed he did.

Time moved on and on until it was far past evening tea time and approaching supper and the wizard still had not shown. Prim huffed and fumed about the rudeness of the big folk as she stomped down the halls of Bag End. After another hour of pacing and glancing out the window and letting out exaggerated sighs and growls, Prim decided that the old man wasn't going to show and she wasn't going to wait for him. "Humph, if that old man shows up while I'm eating supper, he better not expect any from me!" Prim announced loudly to no one but herself before whisking herself away to the kitchen to make dinner. It was quite dark when Prim finally sat down for supper and she had to light candles throughout the hole so that there was still a little light in the place. She had all but forgotten about the visitor that never showed up to tea and was set in not letting it ruin the rest of her evening, after all it was not every day that Bilbo asked her to come and visit not to mention to watch the place. She had long ago, discarded her nice dress that she had been set on wearing to welcome her guest but instead of wearing her nightgown, which she realized had been forgotten, she borrowed a pair from her cousin. Normally, she wouldn't have worn a man's nightclothes but she was alone and she was quite sure her cousin would not have minded. Yes, it was a little improper but who would see her? So, dressed in comfortable bed clothes and a robe, Prim sat down in the warm kitchen to eat her dinner of grilled fish, potatoes and grilled mushrooms.

It was then that a loud knock sounded at the door and Prim practically slammed her fork down onto the table. "Of course, leave it to the Big Folk to arrive for supper when invited to tea!" She stood up and walked to the door as she made sure her robe was tied shut and put on her most hospitable hobbit smile to welcome the unwelcomed guest. She was a hobbit after all and so she would shine a light on his rude behavior by highlighting the great hobbit hospitality that her people were famous for. No doubt the wizard would feel guilty once he realizes the inconvenience he has caused and at that time Prim would graciously accept his heartfelt apologize and say that it is not his fault that he was a large bumbling fool of an old man. Oh yes, it would be quite worth the trouble then. As she swung open the door, ready to greet an old man in gray, she was stunned to see a dwarf standing in front of her. The unexpected image gave her a small start and she took a step back in surprise, "Oh!" she exclaimed quietly and couldn't help but show her confusion. "Can I help you?" she asked once she composed herself, only to be forced aside as the dwarf pushed inside as though he had been expected.

The imtidating dwarf hung his green cloak hastily on the nearest peg and turned to Prim, "Dwalin, at your service!" he said with a low bow. His voice coarse and short, as if the action was merely habit and was not as important as other things on his mind.

"Primrose Took, at yours." said the flabbergasted hobbit, still unable to bring forth any of the questions swirling around in her mind. It wasn't every day that a dwarf shows up unannounced so she could not help but be kind and polite, if not a little surprised. Prim couldn't help but frown however when Dwalin started making his way down the corridor, peering into the different rooms as he went. She quickly went after him, "C-can I help you?"

"Where is it?" the dwarf with the dark beard and the shaved and tattooed head, not even bothering to look at her as he continued his search. "Is it in here?"

Prim stopped for a moment, "Where is what?" she asked, unabashedly upset and confused. After all, this visitor was unexpected and there was no way that he came here with expectations of any kind. "What's in where?"

"Dinner." The dwarf said matter-o-factly, "I was told there'd be food and lots of it." His lips pulled up under his beard into a crooked smirk as he finally reached the kitchen and spotted the plate with Prim's supper lying upon it. Dwalin took no time in sitting himself in front of it and started helping himself.

"By all means!" she cried seeing her dinner being devoured, quite at her ends at the whole situation. Seeing that the dwarf wasn't going to pay her any attention until his stomach was full with her supper, Prim resigned herself to sit on a little stool in the corner. "Do I know you?" she choked out meekly, trying to make sense of what was going on.

"No," he said through a mouthful of food. His voice sounding shocked and annoyed as if he had just answered a stupid and bothersome question. Prim frowned and sunk down in her seat as she glowered at him. Once Dwalin had finished shoveling the last bit of food into his mouth, he look up at her from under bushy eyebrows, "Is there any more?"

"Pardon?"

"Food. Is there any more?" he clarified gruffly.

"Oh," she exclaimed softly as she hopped off her little stool and looked around, finally grabbing a plate of biscuits. As she spun around, she deftly slipped a couple of biscuits into the pockets of her robes for her to eat later. "Here." she gasped as she practically threw down the plate in front of the dwarf, who looked up with raised eyebrows before starting on them.

Prim had barely returned to her sad little stool when came a loud, harsh ring from the door. She looked up, eyes wide and prayed that it had just been her ears ringing. Any hopes of it being a figment of her frazzled nerves was shot down when Dwalin decided he would point out that it was, in fact, the door. She shot him a brief glare before hopping to her feet and rushed to the door, thinking that this time, it had to be Gandalf. Primrose was about to say, "So you have got here at last!" but as she opened the door, she was faced with yet another dwarf. Unlike the scary looking Dwalin, the dwarf before her was much shorter and wider with a snowy head of hair and a handsome long beard, equally as white. He had a large nose and a friendly twinkle in his eye on his aged face. Like Dwalin, he too hopped inside the door.

Upon seeing Dwalin's green cloak on the peg next to the one he was placing his own scarlet one, he exclaimed happily, "I see they have begun to arrive already" He turned to Primrose and gave a deep, meaningful bow, "Balin, at your service," he said, saluting with a hand on his chest.

"Thank you," Prim replied breathlessly, unable to say anything else for her mind was still rolling Balin's statement that they have begun to arrive. It upset her deeply at the message's meaning that she could be expecting more than just the two. Balin's kindly voice interrupted her brooding and she realized that she had been standing there holding the door open like a fool while the newest house guest had gone inside and was now face to face with Dwalin. She frowned with embarrassment and she quickly shut the door and went into the living room where the two dwarfs had their arms locked in a friendly greeting.

"Brother." the taller Dwalin said in a low, affectionate voice, and then chuckled, "You are shorter and wider than the last we met."

Balin laughed, "Not shorter, just wider. But still enough to show you a thing or two." The two smiled and leaned in to touch foreheads and Primrose smiled, her heart light at seeing the emotional reunion between the two dwarfs. Seeing the two brothers reunited almost made up for their unexpected visit, that was until the two dwarves butted heads so violently that it caused her head to hurt. She followed them as they went off to the pantry and started taking inventory of its contents. Primrose was trying think of what she was going to tell Bilbo when he came back to find his pantry empty when she heard yet another ring at the door.

"Gandalf for certain this time," she thought angrily as she puffed down the corridor. She should not have gotten her hopes for the third time that evening; it was not the wizard who was on the other side of Bilbo's front door. This time it was two rather young and handsome looking dwarves, wearing blue hooded cloaks. One had dark hair and short beard, shaved close to his chin and a pair of dark sparklingly eyes that promised good hearted mischief. The other had golden hair and a start of a good beard that was just long enough to braid into two plaits. His nose was a bit larger than the dark haired dwarf and his eyes were an intelligent blue. Both dwarves were laid heavy with various knives and swords and other weapons and their boots were covered in a thick layer of mud.

"Fili" said the blonde dwarf.

"Kili." echoed the second.

"At your service!" They chimed together as they pulled back their blue hoods and bowed before sweeping in throw the door.

"Primrose Took, at yours." she piped pleasantly before turning to close the door and frowning. "You two are most definitely related." she muttered under her breathe.

"How'd you know!?" the dark haired youth asked enthusiastically as he hung his hood up.

Prim not fully aware that she had said her thoughts aloud until then stuttered, trying to think up another reason than the not so pleasant one that had spurred the thought. "You have a similar look on your faces; it is quite obvious that the two of you are kin."

The young dwarf smiled before the two of them started unloading their burdens and tossing them to the side as they made their way down the passages. Tracking mud as they went.

"Please, your boots!" Primrose cried after them, all but in tears at the mess they were leaving behind them. She trailed them darkly, picking up the weapons they left and stored them properly before going to grab herself a much needed drink. Prim could hear the company of dwarves talking of mines and gold and troubles with goblins and of dragons, and most of what they spoke of went over Primrose's poor, spinning head. She had only just sat herself down when, -ding-dong-a-ling, rang that horrible bell once again. Prim was quite ready to pull the damned thing's handle off and be done with its ringing. Her head fell into her hands as she let out a shuddering sigh at the trouble Bilbo had gotten her into. Ding-dong-a-ling-dang rang the nasty little bell once again and Primrose reluctantly rose to her feet. As she opened the door, no longer having the strength to force anything resembling a smile on her face, to find five more dwarves. Dori, Nori, Ori, Oin and Gloin were their names.

She followed them through the passage where they joined the rest of the dwarves in rearranging Bilbo's dining room. Plates were being thrown and furniture being moves and Prim was dreadfully sure that she was going to faint. Some started calling out for ale and some for porter or coffee. All of them called for cakes; and so Primrose was kept very busy for a while. All the while cursing Bilbo and that damn wizard.

A loud knock sounded at the door and by the sound of it, it was someone knocking on the round door with a hard stick. A stick surely cracking and denting Bilbo's beautiful green door. She put down what she was holding and rushed to the door, face red in her anger and was very close to blowing her top. Prim pulled back on the door with a jerk and in fell four more dwarves. And there behind them all, leaning on his staff, laughing was Gandalf. Upon seeing her, Gandalf's bushing eyebrows pushed up under the brim of his hat and surprise. The four dwarves made their introductions which Primrose accepted gracefully and once they had all hung up their rainbow of cloaks and rushed off to join the throng, she turned a cold gaze to Gandalf.

"Well, this is most certainly an unexpected surprise!" The old man exclaimed as he removed his hat and ducked inside. "Why, if it isn't Primrose Took!"

Prim nodded with an obviously forced smile, "Greetings Mr. Gandalf. Bilbo extends his regrets, he was called away suddenly on urgent affairs and could not be here. I am here to act as hostess tonight, though you are quiet late and have seemed to taken it upon yourself to invite a few unexpected guest." She did not try to hide the coolness in her voice, making it known that she was not pleased with the evenings events. "I had just given up hope that you were to show and had just sat down to eat dinner when the first one showed up. Ate the food right off my own plate, he did. I dare say, the first one hasn't stopped eating since he arrived."

"Oh," the old wizard said, apologetically, "forgive me, I was sure I had mentioned the additional guests when I last met with Bilbo but now I see that I must have been mistaken. As for our tardiness, I'm afraid that the journey took longer than I had initially hoped."

A loud clatter of plates and the sound of furniture being dragged against the floor caused Prim to spin around to see one of the dwarves juggling heirloom dishes and one of Bilbo's antique chairs. She gave out a loud cry before rushing off to stop some disaster from occurring leaving Gandalf alone with a dark expression, shaking his head. "Most unexpected, indeed."

The next half an hour was spent trying to keep the dwarves' hands off of Bilbo's antiques for they all seemed quite set on bringing out every piece of valuable furniture out into the dining all. The only dwarf that seemed to have any inkling of common courtesey was Oin, an awkward and shy young dwarf that blushed each time he asked her for something. Prim could not help but smile and speak kindly to him but for the majority her time was spent flittering from pantry to pantry, trying to save something for when Bilbo returned.

At one moment when Primrose stood in the corner of the main hall, helplessly watching the destruction of Bag End, Gandalf came to stand beside her. "What is ever the matter Miss Took?"

Her eyes turned on him incredulously, "What is the matter? What is the matter?" Prim's voice was low and shrill, "Oh nothing is the matter! Nothing at all! Only that Bilbo asked me to take good care of Bag End and to entertain a wizard and now I'm watching her be torn apart and having to deal with, not only a wizard but a whole company of dwarves." She let out a miserable moan, "I am quite sure Bilbo will skin me alive when he comes back."

Gandalf laughed, "I think it is quite the merry gathering!"

"Merry? Merry for them perhaps. I dare say they have no regards for the property of others. There's mud trod on the carpets, they've cleaned out the pantry and all but ruined the plumbing. I dare say that I won't get a wink of sleep tonight, for I'll be stuck cleaning long into the night."

Gandalf had urged her to give them all a chance and not let her mind worry about the cleaning until the morning but Primrose could not but distress over it all.

When finally the dwarves seemed to have eaten their fill, Primrose set her weary self upon the task of clearing the table but before she could even pick up two plates, they were whisked out of her hands. Already, the dwarves around her, excluding Gandalf, who was merrily watching the show, had made tall piles of all the things. Off they went, balancing towers of plates, each with a bottle on top. Prim was left, almost squeaking with fright: "Please don't trouble yourselves! I can manage." But instead of stopping the dwarves started to laugh and sing a song.

At the end of the dreadful song about breaking dishes and spilling milk on the carpets, all the dishes had been washed, dried and placed in tidy little stacks without a single dish being broken. How they had managed was beyond Primrose but when that heavy, sharp knocking sounded, the company became silent. Gandalf took a long draw on his long pipe, looking quite serious as he turned to look towards the door, "He has arrived." Primrose rose slowly, quite shocked at the sudden change of mood and decided that it was best if she didn't waste time answering it. If whoever was on the other side of the door, commanded that much of a change in the mood of dwarves than he was not one to be kept waiting. Prim was right in this thought for on the other side of the door stood, an enormously important dwarf, no other than the great Thorin Oakenshield himself. Of course, Prim did not know how important he was until later in the evening but it was clear enough from how the dwarf carried himself that he was important, or at least thought himself to be. The dwarf was older but not as old as many of the dwarves already sitting at her table but not as young as Fili, Kili and Oin. If she had to guess, he was middle aged as far as dwarves were concerned for his long, wavy black hair was streaked with gray but his face was still youthful except for the start of wrinkles at the corners of his eyes and on his brow. This Thorn was quite haughty and in face did not bother to great her as the others had done and instead gave her an odd look and Prim suddenly became quite aware on her current appearance. She let out a nervous laugh as she smoothed out invisible wrinkles on her robe and tried to tidy her hair, her face flushing pink. "Please, come inside and let me take your cloak."

He took of his cloak and handed to her, "Were you not informed of our meeting?"

Prim's faced became a darker shade of pink as she took his cloak and turned to hang it up with the others, trying to find her voice for she felt quite sheepish and awkward. Fortunately, Gandalf, who had just walked up, answered for her. "Ah, I believe that would be my fault," he admitted apologetically. "It seems when I met with my friend the other day, I forgot to tell him that there would be others and in fact I had told Mr. Baggins that it would be over tea time that we would be meeting. I'm afraid Miss. Took was quite oblivious to our small get-together and had given up that I would ever show up, since it was long past the time for tea."

The noble dwarf nodded before looking around, "So, this Mr. Baggins, is he the hobbit you spoke of? Surely, it is not the woman."

Gandalf shook his head, "Regretfully, Mr. Baggins was called off for some urgent matters and is not here. I seemed to have also failed to tell him how important it was for us to speak, but don't worry, we are well looked after for we his dear cousin." He said hastily before turning to Prim, "Miss Primrose Mirabella Took, may I introduce the leader of our company, Thorin Oakenshield."

Thorin only gave a small nod in her direction but his eyes never left Gandalf, "Does this change things?"

Gandalf gave a nervous looking smile and his eyes landed on Prim just long enough to make her fidget before moving back to Thorin, "No, I do not think so. Hobbits are very peculiar creatures and tend to surprise even the most world wise. Should she choose, I believe she can be just what we are looking for."

Thorin let out an unsatisfied grunt as he turned to Prim a hard, judgmental stare before heading down to the dining room to join his company, leaving Prim in a huff. "Who does he think he is?" she puffed out, stamping her feet angrily as Gandalf let out a sigh as if relieved in Thorin's reaction.

The old wizard turned to her, "That, my dear Primrose, is a dwarf prince. One that has had a much undeserved hard life."

Her mouth opened up into a small 'O' of understanding before it snapped back into a stubborn frown, as she crossed her arms across her chest. "Prince or not, that doesn't excuse him for bad manners. Not even a proper 'how-do-you-do'! I would have thought his manners would have at least surpassed his friends in the other room, but in fact he is much ruder. Prince, indeed! And what's all this nonsense about me changing anything? By all means, just because Bilbo isn't here to entertain, doesn't mean I can't do just as well of job! After all, I was always told that I could outwit him on even his best day when we were younger."

Gandalf smiled down at the stubborn hobbit lass before remembering the very impatient dwarf prince waiting for the meeting to begin. He cleared his throat hastily, "Well, I believe I should go and speak with Thorin for a moment. Primrose, perhaps you might wish to put more appropriate clothes now that you have moment to do so?"

Prim blinked a couple of times before blushing. She bobbed her head hastily, "Oh. Yes. Quite right," she agreed before she turned and fled to her room. Moments later, after the fastest change of clothes that had ever been performed by a hobbit, Primrose emerged, dressed for entertaining company. She felt much more confidant and decided, as she walked down towards the dwarves, that she wasn't about to let them push her around anymore. She was Mistress of Bag End while Bilbo was absent and she wasn't going to let herself be ordered about in her own home. Primrose actually had more of a reason to stand up for herself, since in fact; this was not her own house. She couldn't well have Bag End destroyed under her care. She also decided that she would show Thorin the respect that his position called for and in the process, shed light on his poor manners.

Before joining them, Primrose made a brief stop to find if Bilbo's secret stash of beautifully aged wines had remained safely hidden from the ransacking dwarves and was happy to find that they perfectly well hidden away; she found Bilbo's finest glass for it and poured a respectful amount before returning the bottle to its safe hiding place. She paused before removing the bottle once again and poured one for herself before taking the two glasses out to the waiting dwarves. Upon entering, Kili jumped to his feet and laughed loudly, "Ori was right after all! You are a girl!"

This caused Prim's face to turn pink and she gave the young, dark haired dwarf a glare. "Of course I am!" she huffed as she offered Thorin the wine in the finer glass, which the noble dwarf accepted with a nod. "I should think it is rather obvious!"

Kili laughed at Prim's flustered face, "It is hard to tell with you Halflings, you all seem to like such bright and flowery colors." He looked at his brother, Fili, who was shaking his head, and elbowed him, "Fili, look! I didn't believe -"

"Hush!" scolded Gandalf. "Let Thorin speak."

"Gandalf, dwarves and Miss. Took! We are met together in the house of our friend and fellow conspirator, this most excellent and audacious hobbit-may the hair on her toes never fall out! All praise to her wine and ale!" He paused for a moment to allow everyone to 'here here' and for Prim to politely thank him for his kind words-though she was half tempted to point out that this was not her house and that she did not all like the terms audacious and fellow conspirator, to be associated with her. Thorin went on:

"We are met to discuss our plans, our ways, means, policy and devices. We shall soon before the break of day start on our long, long journey, a journey from which some of us, or perhaps all of us may never return. Our object is well known to us all. To the estimable Miss Took, and perhaps to one of two of the younger dwarves, the exact situation at the moment may require a little brief explanation-"

Much of Thorin's brief explanation was not so brief, but that was Thorin's way. He was an important dwarf and if Gandalf would have allowed it, he would have probably gone on for quite a while longer until he was blue in the face, without telling anyone there anything that was not already known. Primrose was sitting and listening the whole time and all the while trying to contain the panic that this explanation was causing to swell inside. She was quite sure that she would not be able to hold back a cry when Gandalf interrupted, not doubt seeing the color drain from Prim's face and the way she grasped the little glass of wine in her hands, knuckles white. Prim took her chance and jumped to her feet with an excited, nervous squeak and started to flee this whole situation.

"Miss Took, where on earth are you off to?" Gandalf called after her, laughter in his voice.

She stopped and turned, her hands gripping the sides of her dress. "Oh. Um. I thought I might grab another light! Yes! Just more light, I think! Don't bother!" she squeaked as she saw Gandalf and one or two of the dwarves stand up anxiously. "Don't bother yourselves! I am quite fine! Really, quite well." she said as she stepped backwards. "I am quite capable. I shant be long! Not long at all. Just a light it all!" And with that Prim spun and fled into the other room where she collapsed into a chair in the corner to calm herself.

"Excitable little hobbit," said Gandalf, as he settled back down into his seat with a chuckle, "Gets funny queer fits, but she is one of the best-as fierce as a dragon in a pinch."

The dwarves returned to their seats and Thorin, who had not left his chair, looked to the wizard with a wholly unamused look set onto his serious face, "She's more like a door mouse than a dragon." The dwarves and Gandalf laughed.

"Exactly," Gandalf said with his eyes crinkled from a knowing smile, "A mouse is a most timid and excitable creature, it is easy to startle but do you ever see or hear a mouse? Or at least, do you ever take notice of one?" When the silence didn't break, the wizard went on: "Of course not. Mice make excellent burglars because no one pays much attention to one, meek, little mouse scurrying about."

The soft(er) spoken dwarf Ori piped up, sounding proud of himself, "That's why we need Miss Took!" Ori's proud moment was quickly shot down by the other dwarves, who laughed and called him silly and made his expression fall into one of embarrassment and self-pity.

Balin was the next dwarf who spoke, "It is no place for a woman where we're going. Even if she is as talent of a burglar as you say, we are not stealing trinkets from sleepy houses; we are going after a dragon."

"Balin is right," Thorin said sharply, "when you told me that you would find the final member of our company, I placed faith that you would find someone that would be a valuable asset to this quest. I did not expect you to choose a Halfling, not just a Halfling but a young woman. She has no place on this journey, Gandalf."

Primrose had been sitting silently in the next room, listening to the words being spoken. Gandalf had been good enough to defend her abrupt departure from the table valiantly and she was thankful for that but as the conversation progressed, her fear and anxiousness from learning the details of the quest seemed to diminish and be replaced by anger. She knew it was the way of the world, it was a man's world and a woman had few places she belonged in it but it had always bothered Prim, who was always a bit of a free-spirit, that men always felt they had to point it out all the time. Really, a woman could do the all the things men do just as well, We only choose not to do them.

"You told me to pick someone and Miss Took is my choice. You should trust my judgment." Gandalf voice argued and which several voices responded in outrage, all arguing with and against each other. Some agreed with Gandalf, saying that he was wiser than any of them, others stood firm with Balin and Thorin.

After a few minutes of the arguing, Prim stood to her feet; her jaw set tight, her eyes angry and determined as she marched into the other room with hands on her hips. "That is quite enough, all of you!" she roared, her sudden appearance and her surprising assertiveness that seemed to have been non-existent earlier caused them all to stop their bickering and stare. "You should all be ashamed of yourselves!" she chastised the group, "Especially, you Master Thorin: A man of your standing showing such disregard to your hostess is beyond any justification. You may not like the situation, just as I do not like the fact that my home has been invaded by a company of dwarves, who has cleaned me out of house and home, but as master of this home, I have certain obligations to be pleasant, polite accommodating. I have opened up my home to all of you and yet you sit here, in my dining room, having drunk all my ale and ate all my food and still have the nerve to speak of me in such a manner. You should be ashamed. All of you." Her eyes surveyed the group of bearded me, who, with the exception of Thorin, Dwalin and Balin, had sunken low into their chairs, looking quite sorry for themselves. Two of the three exceptions still had their eyes downcast, looking as though they had just been scolded by their mothers, while Thorin sat eyes boring into her. Surprisingly, Thorin's steely gaze did not make her falter and for once the mighty prince did not look so intimidating.

Prim returned his gaze and matched its intensity, it was a challenge, the each were daring each other to say something or to admit defeat by looking away first, but they both were set on not backing down. The sound of Gandalf chuckling made both Hobbit and Dwarf Prince break eye contact simultaneously, Prim's eyes snapped angrily at the wizard, "I don't see what's so funny Gandalf. You are as guilty as the lot of them so you would do well to wipe that smug look off your face and have the decency to look sorry for yourself."

Gandalf coughed and sputtered, the smile vanishing from his face and Prim smiled, satisfied with the reaction. "Now that that's done, we can get down to business. First thing, I am a Hobbit, not a Halfling. Best way not to offend the one who is feeding you and, I can safely assume, housing you all for the night is by not using a term that her people, as a whole do not like being called. Now, I believe we can all agree on the fact that I am not only a Hobbit but I am a woman as well, as shocking as that may be to some of you." She gave Fili and Kili a pointed look before turning her face to the whole of the group, "Now I don't really understand this bunch of nonsense about dragons and treasure but I'm sure I'd be able to do anything any other hobbit, especially my cousin, could do just as good if not better." With that Prim crossed her arms in front of her and gave a sharp nod, immensely proud of herself and feeling that she had put everyone in their proper places.

"So you accept then?" a hopeful voice rang out from one of the dwarves, breaking Prim out of her very Tookish mindset.

"Excuse me?" she squeaked out trying to figure out which dwarf had spoken. It was obvious the suggestion that she would actually be going on this adventure had brought out the timidness that came from her mother's side.

"You hear that? She said yes!" proclaimed the dwarf with obviously bad hearing merrily.

"I-I said no such thing!" Prim fussed, "I only suggested if I had the mind to accept, I'd be able to perform adequately for the job needed." She turned and walked over to a small stool and sat down in a huff, "Besides, I've heard no mention of what's in it for me. From what I gather you would expect me to face a dragon and you expect me to drop everything and accept?" A laugh jumped from her throat as if a joke had been said, giving the group a disbelieving look before collecting herself. "Well," she announced matter-o-factly, "If you think that then you've come to the wrong hobbit."

There was a silence and all eyes were on poor little Primrose Took and once again. She felt small and very uncomfortable and though she tried her hardest; Once again she found her eyes locking with those dark, piercing eyes of Thorin Oakenshield. Gandalf as if sensing the rising tension, leaned in toward the prince and whispered into his ear, "Thorin, you must trust me on this."

Thorin's eyes only flickered away towards Gandalf for a fraction of a second before recapturing those that belonged to our reluctant heroine. Prim felt she was going to faint but just when she thought she was going to expire under that heavy gaze; Thorin shifted in his chair and broke his gaze, suddenly looking disinterested. "Balin," he said authoritively, "give it to her."

Just like that, everyone, not including Primrose, relaxed and the atmosphere of the dwarves lightened. The sagely, white haired Balin, reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of parchment and Prim found herself jumping to her feet to accept it from him. Carefully, Prim unfolded the paper as if she had expected to explode and Balin, ever the professional decided explain its contents to help her ease her nerves. "You'll find it's the usual: risks, out-of-pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, and so forth."

Prim was already skimming through the contract that was written in tidy and clear script though as she read, murmuring aloud. "-Up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit if any. Sounds fair enough" she agreed with herself bobbing her head as she continued, "Present company shall not be liable for injuries including but not limited to laceration, evisceration...incineration?" Each word of injury made her Tookish side become smaller and smaller as her voice became more breathless and shaky.

As if wanting to make her growing panic worse, the dwarf named Bofur came up beside her with playful gleam in his eye though he tried to appear just as sagely as Balin or even Thoring himself. "Oh, aye. He'll melt the flesh right of your bones in a blink of an eye." He smirked and took a long drag of his pipe when Prim squeaked and lost all color to her usual rosy complexion.

Balin leaned into her, "You all right, lassie?"

"Yes, I'm-I'm fine." Prim laughed nervously as she took a seat, pulling out a lace handkerchief and dabbing the sweat that had started to bead on her pale forehead.

"Think furnace," Bofur whispered close to her ears, "with wings!"

She looked at him, eyes wide and even though her heart was racing and her head was spinning, she could tell the dwarf was having too much fun but she didn't have the self-control to mention it. Prim tried tapping her fingers on her knees and breathing exercises but nothing seemed to give her relief from her distress and at once she had this desperate need for air and she jumped to her feet, causing her head to spin. "I need air!" Prim shouted as she rushed into the next room, away from the heat and stuffiness of the crowded dining room. Images of fire and brimstone and lots of pain and death assaulting her brain.

Bofur having too much fun followed her as far as the archway and leaned against the frame, "Flash of light, searing pain, then poof! You're nothing but a pile of ash."

Primrose suddenly stopped her pacing and became eerily still, her eyes trained up at the ceiling as if she was in the middle of a thought and once again eyes were on her and Gandalf had even rose to his feet and looked as though he was about to go over to her. The silence seemed to last forever until eventually Prim turned, shook her head and proceeded to faint right on the rug, immediately after managing to utter the word, "No."

When Primrose came to, she was sitting in Bilbo's favorite armchair in a dark room with only a single candle lit on a small table at the far end of the room. She could hear the dwarves muttering quietly a couple rooms over but what caught her attention was the thin line of silvery smoke trailing up to the ceiling from the shadows behind the candle. As her eyes focused she could make out the moonlit silhouette of Gandalf and could see his eyes watching her. Sitting there under Gandalf's steady gaze with him making to sign of speaking anything soon, made Prim feel like she was a child again and was waiting for the inevitable 'I'm severely disappointed with you' speech. It made her shrink away from his gaze and in turn notice a steaming cup of tea sitting on the side table beside her. Snatching up the cup, she took a slow sip, eyes darting to and from the wizard.

After a long moment of no one saying anything, Prim had become quite irritated with the gray wizard. Taking another calming drink of her tea, she looked at the wizard, "I'll be fine, I just need to sit quietly for a while."

As if her words were a trigger, Gandalf sprung to his feet, pipe in hand. "If you ask me, you've been sitting quietly for far too long Primrose Took. When did doilies and dishes become so precious to you? Where is the hobbit that used to knock her cousins in the mud and go looking for elves in the woods?"

Prim sighed and rubbed her temples, "She grew up Gandalf. I have responsibilities now; I can't go gallivanting off on adventures. I have an obligation to my family, they rely on me." She meant to sound proud but her voice was quiet and defeated.

"Hah!" Gandalf scoffed, "Responsibilities indeed! Tell me Primrose, you speak of your responsibilities your family expects from you, what are those responsibilities?"

"Well," she started, sounding proud and respectful once again as she straighten up in her chair and placed her cup on the table, "Bilbo gave me full responsibility for this house while he was away. I cannot just leave it unattended can I? How would that reflect upon my character?"

"If Bilbo was the hobbit I thought him to be, it would not be you sitting here before me, but him! Bilbo knew very well that I wanted him to be a part of some adventure but he ran away like a coward and dumped the burden off on his poor cousin. Tell me, how does that speak for his character?"

Primrose frowned and diverted her attention to the pattern on the rug; "He did tell me you were up to trouble and to not let you push me around..." she defended weakly.

"Did he now? Now that completely makes up for the whole thing now doesn't it?" Gandalf said sarcastically.

"I also have many responsibilities at home. I'm expected to help with the housework and the cooking and taking care of my younger siblings."

"You speak about the expectations of your family but what about the expectations of yourself?" the old wizard said with a sigh, his voice softening. "I know the years did not change you that much, despite what you tell yourself. I know that you dream of more than what you family expects of you. Besides," he said laughing, "what about living up to that Took name of yours?"

Prim looked at him and a smile crept up on her face, though she couldn't bare looking the wizard in the face. What he spoke seemed to sound deeply within her. She wanted so much more than what her family did. Her mother and father's only hopes for her were to marry well and have many children so that eventually Prim would take care of them. She would live with her parents until she married or her parents died after seeing her grow to be a spinster. Prim didn't want that. Sure she'd like to be married eventually, but she didn't want that to dictate how she lived her own life. She wanted to be a part of something and not be dependent on others.

"You are a Took. Did you know that your Great-Great-Great-Great Uncle Bullroarer Took was so large that he could ride a real horse?"

Prim laughed and nodded, "That story has been passed down for generations!"

"Well he could!" Gandalf said heatedly, knowing Prim didn't believe those stories in the least, "In the Battle of Greenfield, he charged the Goblin ranks. He swung his club so hard, he knocked the Goblin King's head clean off and it sailed a hundred yards and went down a rabbit hole. And thus the battle was won," his stern face broke into a smile, "and the game of golf invented at the same time."

"I do believe you made that last bit up." Prim accused lightly.

"Well, all good stories deserve embellishment." Gandalf laughed before looking at Prim with a serious that made her smile disappear, "You'll have a tale or two to tell of your own when you come back."

Primrose sighed and took another drink of her tea and after staring at the half empty cup, she looked up, "Can you promise me that I will come back?"

Gandalf shook his head solemnly, "No, and if you do you will not be the same."

Her conversation with Gandalf was the last she held with any of her house guests before she crawled into bed. She wanted to hide her face and cry into her pillow but instead she simply stared up at the ceiling, listening to the noise of the dwarves and contemplating her heart. It scared her that a part of her wanted her to pack a bag and leave with the dwarves that very second. What was even scarier was how strong that desire was and Primrose for the first time wasn't sure what she wanted. Music started to drift through her door, it was solemn sounding but it somehow sounded hopeful. The music built up until Thorin's clear baritone started singing. One by one, more voice joined in on the haunting song that told the story of Thorin's past and how the dragon stole their home away from them.

Blinking, Primrose opened her eyes, blinking against the morning sun that shone in from the window. She smiled and stretched musing over the strange dream she had and debated whether of sleeping for a bit longer. It was tempted but when the realization that the dwarves had not been a dream, had her up and dressed and rushing out of the bedroom quicker than you could say Good Morning. After a quick check of all the rooms she found that everyone had left and by the dirty dishes, they left a couple hours earlier. For some reason, Prim found herself disappointed and the big empty house didn't seem as peaceful as it did lonely. Shaking her sour mood, she went about fixing her own breakfast and moving into the parlor for some light reading before she set on the dreadful task of dishes.

Some time had passed when Primrose had finally looked up from her book to glance at the clock on the mantle only to find it to be blocked by an envelope. Going over and opening it up, she found it to be a note and the contract from the previous night. She scanned through the letter and blinked, "The Green Dragon Inn at eleven?" she asked aloud, her eyes shooting at the clock, "Dear me! It's already ten till!" It seemed seconds had passed and how Primrose found herself dressed in her cousin's clothes, hair tied at the back of her head, a rucksack that had been thrown together, without hat or money or anything else a traveler might need, running through Hobbiton as though her heels were on fire. The only thing she had managed to do with any thought was scribbling out a note for her cousin to find when he returned home.

Thank you for reading my little adventure. Right now I am debating whether or not I'm going to continue updating this and trying to figure out the direction I want to go with it. My plans thus far includes sticking pretty close to the original plot as this is supposed to be a retelling of The Hobbit if Bilbo had decided to run off before his adventure ever began. There is a part of me, who wants to deviate and add a little bit of romance into the story and there are possible pairings that would make me go squee, but I would like to keep this as canon to book&movie verses as possible.

This is the chance for input from the readers! Let me know in the comments what you'd like to see. I already have more chapters (which will not be as long as this) done but I'd like to get my ducks in a row before I do any more postings.