Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy. I'm not making any money with fanfiction. ...don't you wish...
Summary: Things take an unanticipated turn for Jackson and April.
Rated for language and sexual references. (Oh yeah..)
An Unexpected Turn Of Events
He's really had it now. He rolls himself over to the cold side of the bed and tries to not hear her sobs in the other room.
He's told her. Seventy million times he told her that Karev wasn't the right kind of person for her to be around with. And he'd always been right.
He'd been right when he punched his stupid self-righteous face after the guy had actually yelled at her in bed, when she finally let her guard down to a man, upset that she wanted to take things slow, leaving her completely brittle.
He'd also been right when it made him sick to see how Karev played nice after that, was annoyingly friendly to her, almost brown-nosing her into forgiving him.
He'd been right to be wary when Alex took her out and he'd been damned right to get nauseous when she told him, beaming, that they had had sex, that this son of a bitch had taken her virginity.
And it wasn't weird at all that he hated the guy for that.
Because April really didn't mean anything to Alex. And it was right to hate someone who was messing with ones best friend.
And that's what she is, his best friend in the whole world. And now, again, she is crying over that asshole, crying her big doe eyes out, wishing for the ground to swallow her whole because he's dumped her.
Like he'd always known he would. But she wouldn't listen. And so now, she didn't confide in him, because she feared the "I told you so".
But he tried, he thinks as he stares at the ceiling, so many times, he's tried to stop her, telling her that she is in it a lot more than he is.
She always retorted what it was with him and Lexie and how she was clearly not in it the way he was...or had been in it with her.
But he was different from April, he wasn't so fragile. Sure it stung, knowing Lexie back with Sloan, especially knowing that it was all she'd really wanted in the first place.
That he had merely been a substitute. But he was okay. He'd been hurt before and he'd had a vague idea of what he was getting himself into with Grey.
His best friend wasn't tough, though, his best friend was fragile, she was delicate and she was falling to pieces one room over and wouldn't let him help.
It was too much, he felt his muscles flex before his brain even registered the change. He wouldn't stay in bed now. He couldn't.
He would either get out and give Karev the good beating that he had long coming or he was going to break her door down and talk to her, set it straight that he wouldn't let her cry through another night without him by her side.
And so on the way out of his room, he pauses as he passes her door, hearing her sobs louder now, all his anger fades, all that is left is that pain, that yearning to make her okay, to make her happy again and so he tries the knob and surprisingly, the door is unlocked.
April doesn't even realize he's entered, she's curled up underneath her blanket, only a mess of brown hair revealing it's her tucked in and she is still crying like it is the end of the world.
He moves slowly, he doesn't want to startle her but soon enough she notices his presence.
"Get out, Jackson", she mutters, it stings just a little bit.
"No, I won't", he hears himself say and that is about all that he can get out, looking at the little mountain of tissues that has piled of on the side of her bed.
He doesn't hesitate, he crosses the room with four long strides and puts himself next to her.
She's his best friend and best friends do things like that, they hold one another when something bad happened.
He did after the shooting and he will now, no matter if she wants it or not.
He slips under the cover and carefully reaches for her body under the comforter, finally finding her, feeling the fabric of her shirt, she is hot and she shivers as he pulls her closer.
"Go away", she cries but he knows that it is just for cover now, a new wave of tears fills her eyes and she pushes herself into him.
He holds her tight, like everyone would and then she breaks free a little and turns around to face him. She doesn't let him catch her eye, though, she is ashamed.
But she still nestles herself close to his chest and he wraps both his arms around her tiny body, pulling her slightly on top of him.
"I'm so stupid", the disgust in her voice almost leaves him speechless.
"You are not stupid, April", he says lamely because he can't think of anything else to say.
"Yes, I am", she insists, and he can feel her tears rolling down his bare chest, "and I didn't listen to you, you were right about everything, I'm such an idiot, I can't believe I let that happen to me, I always wanted things to be special...and I ruined it"
"No, he ruined it", his muscles flex again, this bastard would get his beating, so much was sure, "You are a wonderful person and this is not your fault, Karev is a jerk and he will be sorry"
"I don't want you to hit him", she says sheepishly, "I don't even care about him, I'm angry with myself"
Of course she cares about him, he knows that and he can't help but feel the pang that notion gives him.
"I'm not saying that he'll be sorry because I'll beat the crap out of him, which I would", he says, ignoring the unfamiliar blow of her being so crashed over another guy, "I'm saying he will be sorry when he realizes what an amazing woman he let slip away"
"Thank you", she mumbles but it sounds sad, "but you don't need to say these things, I don't need any more lies"
He freezes.
"What?", he jerks up and brings her level with him, she's looking down but he won't have it, so he lifts her chin up with his left hand so he finally sees her blood-shot eyes, "I'm sorry, what? Lies? April, just look at yourself and don't give me that crap"
She's got that scared Bambi look again. It kills him a little but he's not done yet. As she attempts to lower her head, he cups her face with his palm and holds it in place.
"Listen, Karev's a dick and a looser for letting you go", he says pointedly, "and not because I feel like I have to say this and not because I'm your best friend, but quite objectively because you're one hell of a woman, you are smart and determined, you're driven, passionate, you're a great doctor and an even greater person, you're sweet and sexy and -"
Her face twitches.
"You think I'm sexy?", it is not a matter of reassuring, she looks like she is about to burst out laughing, as if he said some outrageously inaccurate thing about her.
He pauses and he thinks. He hadn't meant to say that. He didn't think of her that way. She was his best friend. Nothing was between them, ever. Not this way. But she looks at him demanding and so he asks himself.
"Yes", he says, truthfully as he realizes, "yes, I think you're sexy"
And he's just as surprised as she is.
For a while, none of them says anything, they just stare at each other, he still has her cheek resting in his palm and the tension that gradually builds is about the weirdest sensation he's felt in a long long time.
She is sexy. In fact, she's so sexy to him, now that he thinks about it, lying in bed with her, both of them not wearing many clothes, that certain areas of his body draw all the heat and all the blood from his brain to them.
His mind incoherently produces thoughts painted by wonder and surprise, he had no idea that he found her sexy, attractive, appealing and all the other vocabularies his brain shoots at him, these ones being the ones he allows himself to think about. He wouldn't think out the dirty words that pop up, she's too good to be thought about with primal, vulgar words that resound quieter inside of him.
His eyes slip to her lips naturally and through the mist of his own amazement he hears her catching her breath.
"Jackson", she says weakly, her voice soft and husky and that seals the deal, with the same irrevocable force that made him go to her earlier, he now leans in, slowly, cautiously, ready to stop if she doesn't want him to go on. But he knows what he wants now.
He gets closer to her and closer still, she is not moving, not one bit, he lowers his eyes and he can taste her ragged breath as his lips part and first, just gently brush hers. Waiting for a response, waiting for her to pull away. She doesn't. So he kisses her again.
Longer this time and he can't really believe what he's doing and again, he asks himself in wonder how this can feel so good and so overdue...now that he thinks about it.
He was always angry at Karev for fooling around with her, he felt sick when they were being all lovey-dovey, now, had he just been jealous? Was he so angry that someone was treating her like a consolation price when she really was the jackpot? His jackpot?
And then there's a new sensation; an ever so gently pressure on his lips as she starts to kiss him back. Just as careful as him, juggling with this new and surprising turn of events that none of them had anticipated.
For a second he wonders how it will be in the morning but that only lasts so long until she brings her hands up to him, one pulling at his neck, one clasping the small of his back.
She deepens the kiss on her accord, parting her lips to give him access, letting their tongues set little fireworks off. She pushes him down, still slower than one would have thought but more sure of herself now and as his head hits the cushion, a soundless moan escapes him. He lets his hands trail of, wander down her body until he has her hips and places her on top of him.
She breathes harder now and breaks the kiss only to lean further down and let her mouth cover all of his neck, sucking and licking as if there was no tomorrow.
"April", he winces, he can't keep doing this, she can't. If she goes on like this there will be no stopping him. Oh my. If she does this again, he will burst, he will take her. And then he won't be gentle anymore, he will satisfy his need for her, although he doubts at this point that this can ever be done.
But it is not right, not special enough, not what he wants for her. He doesn't want to take her, consume her like that son of a bitch did, with no care for her, he wants it to be special, substantial, he cares too much about her to just grab what he wants and needs.
"Stop", he breathes out but still has his grip on her hips, still pushing her down to his heat, "we can't...oh...god, April, no"
The kisses slowly fade, his hands wander to her back, he wants the kisses back so he pushes her down. She kisses him again, this time full on the mouth and he chimes in, she moves up a bit, causing frictions and the alarm bells go off even louder, he sucks at her. Just this one kiss, he tells himself and then he clasps his arms around hers, moves up in one swift movement and they sit, facing each other, both of them panting.
"I don't want to do it like this", he says, catching his breath, trying to look at her closely so she will understand what he is trying to tell her. She looks puzzled.
"God, I want you", he exhales heavily, feeling his lower body tight and large with want, so close to erupting, "but I want it to be special, I want you to be sure and not just let me do this because I want it and you don't mind the distraction, I want you to want it, too and I want it to be memorable, does that make sense?"
She takes a beat and he let's go off her. She stares him down, her features unreadable, then she swallows hard and slowly nods.
"Okay", she says and gets on her knees, she robs between his legs and softly kisses his forehead, "let's just go to sleep then"
His brain is satisfied, his body is yearning for her but that isn't what this is about.
She is his best friend, she is the closest thing to being a part of himself that any other woman had ever been, he doesn't want to ruin any of it by using her.
They sink down on the bed together and he puts the covers on top of them while she curls against him, her back against his chest.
They lie quietly for a while but neither their heart rates, nor their breathing comes even close to normalizing and the way she runs her fingertips up and down his arms, the bulge in his boxers, always so tortuously brushing her behind, is never going to go away.
And she taunts him, pulls at his arm, rubbing her delicious ass against him and then kissing his wrist. He feels like he's going to explode.
"April, you're killing me", he whispers and pulls her in despite his best intentions, she is now so close to him, he can feel her own heat radiating, "You gotta stop doing this or I can't keep it together"
And with that, mischievous as he'd never thought she could be, he suddenly feels little hot fingers touching him down where there is no hope for regaining control of himself.
"Maye I don't want you to keep it together"
Damn, she really is sexy.
And it is to late, he's over the edge, there's no stopping him now, though he's tried. He did, he tells himself just before the things she started to do to him make any deeper thoughts impossible.
When they wake up in the morning, entwined together between distorted sheets he waits for the awkwardness to kick in but the way they lie there and she starts talking about her newest patient in pediatrics, it feels like they had always been like that, he guesses you call it, romantically involved.
He has always trusted and cared about her and vice versa, he knows every last thing about her and, oh, does he love her and that really isn't weird or awkward at all.
"Jackson?", she says suddenly, supposedly noticing that he is somewhere else with his thoughts.
"Yes", he replies dutifully.
"You are the best thing in my life", she says, "and have been for a long time"
He is speechless for a moment and then he kisses her, innocently this time but with a promise for more.
"And I'm lucky that I finally noticed that I'm in love with you", and he really is.
He feels like the luckiest man in the world as they go for round five and before his mind goes blank, he smiles at the thought of what's to come for them.
So, there is the new couple I'll be rooting for on Grey's..I know they have other plans for these two but a girl can hope...maybe around next season they'll notice how well they work together...and then I'll be merry.
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