Smoke Spiral
By: Joist
Yohji waved some smoke from his face, and laughed. "No," he said, in response to Ken's question.
"No."
Ken blinked, looking at Yohji unsurely. "Oh, okay. Well, umm..." He blushed, but the darkness of Yohji's room hid it. "D'you, I mean – d'you think..." He hesitated.
Yohji's emerald gaze was set on him blankly, waiting for Ken to finish. He took a drag of his cigarette, and then squished it in the ashtray on his bedside table. He crossed his legs, Indian-style, on his bed and prompted Ken, who had found a new interest in the dying embers of Yohji's cigarette:
"Do you think...what? Focus, KenKen, I gotta get some sleep sometime. It's be a long day." There was emphasis on the world 'long'. Yohji grinned, and coughed.
Ken winced at the nickname, quite demeaning from Yohji in Ken's current (inner) situation, but the insult was ignored as the older man coughed.
"You okay?" he asked, concerned.
Yohji nodded.
"Oh. Umm, okay... So, yeah... do you think..." he continued, eyes darting around the room; he was obviously skirting around an issue, but Yohji didn't want to take the time figure out what it was.
"Hurry up..."
"Right, sorry," Ken apologized, then met Yohji's gaze hesitantly. "Do you think..." He bit his lip; the nerves he had acquired in order to talk to Yohji had left him in just these few moments as he fought to just form words.
"...do you think you'll have enough cigarettes?" His voice was louder than needed, and he felt dumb, coming up with such a stupid substitute for what he was really going to ask.
Yohji looked at his pack of cigarettes, then at Ken. "Well, I guess I'd appreciate it if you got me another pack, KenKen." He paused. "And a lighter?" he added hopefully, grinning the way only Yohji could.
Ken smiled hesitantly back. "Sure, I'll...be back in a bit." He stood, and headed for the door, head down.
But then all his nerve seemed to flood back to him, and he stopped at the doorway and turned. He saw that Yohji had lit another cigarette.
"Hey, uh, Yohji?"
"Hm?" the blonde man replied after blowing out a stream of smoke. It spiraled up, slowly, and Ken watched it rise.
"What do you think...about us?"
Yohji glanced at him. "What do you mean?"
Ken shuffled his feet; his courage had left him. "I mean...could I..." It was too late to take back his words. "—could I...replace...him?" he finished weakly.
The smoke caught Ken's attention again; he watched it, instead of Yohji's face - he was preparing himself for rejection.
The ceiling fan eventually obliterated the wisps of silvery-gray smoke, curling and spiraling upwards in a strange dance, as Ken watched, and he winced. His chocolate gaze averted back to Yohji.
Yohji finally responded. "No, KenKen," he said. "I don't think so." Emerald orbs cast down, a wistful smile surrounding his cigarette.
"Oh, okay...umm...I'll be back in a little while, then." He was referring to getting the cigarettes and lighter for Yohji.
"No, don't worry about it, Ken. I'll get them. I think I'll go out for some fresh air, anyway." He stood, but Ken just shook his head.
"No," Ken said. He waved some smoke from his face, and laughed, bitterly.
"No."
~*~
AN: Fun, huh? Poor Ken, evil Yohji. And yes, I know you're probably confused. What happened? Why's Yohji so depressed (or whatever you'd, call it: Un-Yohji-like)? Etc. etc. Well, this is what happens when I read too much Clover (by CLAMP), and then read really good fanfics about it. It's supposed to be sort of...aloof and cold and empty. ...Yeah. But the prequels/sequels are coming out soon. This is going to be my new story-arc! ^^
Happy New Year, everybody!