Around and around I go until my vision blurs, as tears start to form in my eyes. The icy air cuts my throat as I try in vain to get my stiff muscles to warm up. I never skated mornings... I just was NOT a morning person, and the pain my ankle was not helping at all. I was not ever going to admit that though. Especially since it was that very pain that caused me to drag my rear in the rink this morning for the last 2 months.

From the time I started skating 6 years ago, I wanted to be a singles skater. I loved to jump and spin...and dance across the ice. I didn't feel so out of place and clumsy. I was actually an ok skater. In fact I thought I was making enough progress that I would make it to the National team, until 3 years ago. It started out with a tender pain when I skated for more than a couple hours, it quickly progressed to a constant pain long after I took my skates off. I iced it, rubbed it, rested it, and heated it...I took every pill they gave me...Nothing helped.

Months later, I went to the doctor, and they took x-rays, and MRIs...and they couldn't figure out what had happened. The severe pain was all in my head...funny since I had also started dislocating my shoulder around the same time, and that pain was nothing compared to the one in my ankle. I told myself it would have been no problem if it was in my left...since that was my landing leg...so the pain would just be a moment.

However it was my take off leg...I had to jump off of it. I never knew what I would stepping on to, and by this point the pain was semi-isolated from my arch across my shin and up to my knee, and was starting to spread to my hip. They had me do therapy, and rest...one week I could do that. So began the off a week and on a week training...my jumps became even more hit or miss. My first coach always said, "If you are going to cry, do it in the bathroom. No pain no gain." So I did what he said, he got me this far...so I sucked it up. Until I couldn't walk. I shouldn't have competed at regionals that year...maybe I would have been fine the next, but instead I could hardly skate an hour before the pain started.

I decided to take the rest of my MIFS, and maybe I would get better. And it did...by April I was doing my first competition as a junior. As soon as the awards ceremony was over I ran into the locker room, and changed. I quickly realized that I shouldn't attempt makeup in the locker room unless I wanted blade marks or makeup all over my dress. So I went into the hallway, and what does my coach say. "You can not put your makeup on out here! What if a judge saw you? " Yeah...Heaven forbid a judge were to walk by and see that I was at trying to compete on the same night, as my first prom. I was going to prom alone, because not only did I not date, I had even put my friendships on hold too.

So I didn't date...socialize, or build a social calender, because I had my whole life planned out. I would finish my tests, compete the senior level, at least sectionals, and start coaching...maybe shows, if I was good enough. However when my Birthday rolled around, I couldn't walk without pain again. By now, I had graduated HS 17 with honors. I should have been in a real college. But from the time I started skating...all I could think about was skating, and anything skating related. I only graduated with honors, because by taking AP classes they would let me out of school an hour earlier. Go figure right? So what do I do? If I took a break and gave my ankle time to heal, maybe it would get better again. I just had to time it better right? So the on and off ice started yet again. However by the time regionals came around I could not get my ankle into my skate, no matter how much numbing spray I put on it.

So I took to take my 3rd opinion doctor's advice and up it to taking a whole month off the ice.

One month later my ankle was still hurting.(maybe the first 2 doctors were right?). What if I had really hurt it this time? I still remember my Senior MIFs test the year prior. I had dislocated my shoulder in warm-up yet again...just doing basic crossovers. I could hardly hold my arm up, it is no wonder that I didn't pass the test that morning. It still came out now, and if anything it was worse, because since I couldn't skate I decided to rearrange the whole house. It turns out moving furniture, that weighed as much as, if not more than me, by myself, was not a great idea. So after talking with 2 regional judges we decided I should get back on the ice, and take my senior fs. If my ankle did not get better, I would still have 2 golds. The only condition was that after I passed, I would have to take an additional 2 months off the ice, and I was not allowed to jump for 2 months once I got back on the ice. Not even a single axel.

Now seeing as I had finished all my Freestyle tests, and MIFs...what could I do? Before the end of the first month I had choregraphed a new short and long without jumps. Since I was over 16, they let me skate on coffee club, I just had to share the ice with the dancers. As the typical singles skater I believed singles skaters were better than the dancers. So I made fun of their set dances...and music. One day Emmet came up with a challenge. If it was so easy why don't you get your Gold medal in this. Before I knew it I was drawn into their world, and I would never be the same again.

Even though Emmet was built like a bodybuilder, he was a big teddy bear. Like all the other ice dancers he was homeschooled. His Mom worked some govt. building, and since he was 16 she made sure he was at the rink before any of us. Emmett didn't have a partner at the time of his challenge, so he only considered it fair if he "helped" me though the tests.

It was almost one month later, and we were horsing around after the test session. I had successful passed my first 6 dances, and he was showing me the next 3.

"See Emmett, it was easy. I think I can do the next 3 today. Bring the judges back."

"Yeah. That is because I carried you though the dances. Plus you have to take a freedance."

"Freedance?", why would I need to take a freedance..."Do I have to take the freedance to pass the next tests."

"No, but you do if you want to compete"

"Compete, are you kidding...I am only doing this because you challenged me, I do not even have a partner!"

"Geez Bella, What am I? I do not have a partner, so I will take you through your tests until you find one. It will be good for both of us. Just in case your ankle doesn't get better."

And so it started. After a week off to celebrate, we started working on the freedance, and like a typical 16 yr old boy he was excited to "try" some dance seqs with me.

"Your hand goes here, and my hand goes here."

"Yeah Emmett, I know you have more experience than me, but I highly doubt that your hand goes there. Plus I think we do not have to do anything that complicated for the Pre-Bronze Freedance Test." as I removed his hand from my rear end and back on my hip.

"Emmett quit trying to feel her up!" saved by Rose yet again.

Rose started skating late like me. However, beyond that she was completely different. She was homeschooled, and used to skate singles, but switched to dance last year. It was no surprise she had a partner almost as soon as she started. She had blonde hair, and blue eyes, and did not have a skater's chest like me. Just another reason I did not have a boyfriend. I had brown hair, and brown eyes, and was flat as a board.

"You know you could just teach her the program Edward and I used last year before my tests."

*Smack*

"Hey Bella. You can blame me for trying.", yup typical 16 yr old boy.

"That sounds like a good idea. Thanks Rose." as she quickly jumped on the ice. Edward was still out of town visiting his Dad since they had split up just before Sectionals last year.

I must admit I was so shocked when I walked in the rink and saw her crying. She was a quick learner, and with their model looks they would have no doubt made it to Nationals, and most likely the national team. None of the other dancers talked to her, because she used to skate with him. He was the "perfect" partner/dancer, so she was NOT "good" enough for him. It had gotten to the point that if he got on the ice...she would get off. She just couldn't skate on the same ice.

You see Edward was a bronze-haired Greek God. When he smiled his lips would form into this sexy half smile that could melt the ice you were standing on. He was just a bit older than me...but he was so much more experienced than me. He started skating when he was little with a girl named Tanya. She was a cute petitie, blonde, and together they medaled at Nationals! However that next year they split, and she moved to Delaware. He decided to stay in Texas, and found a new partner, and then another. He was literality "Skate God" at the rink. We were all waiting for him to find his Greek Goddess to skate with. All the girls singles, pairs, dancers, even the hockey girls drooled over him. They didn't just want to be his partner on the ice, but off ice too.