Dive Deep

Fandom: Emmerdale

Pairing: Charity & Vanessa

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: Not mine, just playing games with them.

Summary: It was suggested in spoilers that there was going to be a scene of Rhona having a go at Charity for distracting Vanessa (RE the Ketamine). It seems to have gone walkies though, so I decided to write my own version. Part of a series of one shots prompted by memories-and-musings on tumblr of missing Vanity scenes in the Ketamine plot.

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Charity had been out shopping with Moses for a huge chunk of the day. He needed entertaining and she needed distracting so some retail therapy and an hour in the soft play seemed just the ticket. She had dropped him off with Sammy on the way back as she was working that evening. She'd usually be off all day, but Chas was at the abortion clinic today, so Charity had agreed to cover her evening.

The shift had started at four and even though it had only been an hour Charity was already bored. The Woolpack was relatively quiet so Faith, who was working until six, wouldn't shut up about one thing or another. Charity moved further down the bar, so she was nearer the door, hoping to god that the older woman wouldn't follow her. Tracy was sat with Eric Pollard on the nearest table to that corner of the bar and Charity was going to try and engage in conversation with them. Instead, the door of the pub swung open and Rhona burst in. As soon as the vet spotted Charity she made a beeline towards her.

"Can I have a word?" Rhona demanded.

Charity was instantly put on edge by the other woman's tone, but she bit back any comment and simply nodded her head. This was Vanessa's best friend after all, best not to get in the girlfriend's bad books especially when Ness was so stressed anyway over the tranquilisers.

"Not here" Rhona practically spat.

Now the vet really was pushing her luck. Charity had been spoken to like dirt when she was younger, she had sworn to herself that she would never take that kind of shit again.

"I'm working so here will have to do" she replied with a forced smile.

"Fine" Rhona huffed, "I want to talk to you about Vanessa…"

Her girlfriends name made Charity stand straighter, no longer propping herself up on the bar. Was something wrong? Had she misread the brunette's tone?

"Is she okay?" the blonde asked.

"No of course she isn't!" Rhona exclaimed loudly, catching the attention of most of the punters; "She is scared senseless that she is going to lose her career and all because you wanted her to get you off!"

"Pardon?!" Charity choked.

She was caught between relief that there was no immediate crisis involving her girlfriend and utter confusion. What the hell was Rhona's problem? Was the vet seriously trying to pin it all on her?

"Oh, don't play dumb, she told me how Gabby managed to get hold of the ketamine!" Rhona continued to shout.

The whole pub was definitely listening now and Charity steeled herself against their stares. It wasn't exactly a secret that her and Ness were an item, but she didn't appreciate (and Vanessa certainly wouldn't appreciate) someone yelling about it all over the Woolpack. Nor would Vanessa appreciate Rhona announcing the fact she lost tranquiliser to the world and its wife even if it was bound to get around by word of mouth anyway.

She'd already had some stick from Cain about Vanessa calling the police and accusing Liv and Gabby. She'd told him to get lost of course and to leave her girlfriend alone. The Dingle family code was that you don't report on your own but it's not like it hadn't been broken before and all had been forgiven. Now she was getting shit from Vanessa's friend.

"You are blaming me for some little witch stealing from her?!" Charity hissed across the bar. At least she could try to keep her end of the 'discussion' out of most people's ear shot.

"If you hadn't distracted her from her work then it would never have happened!" Rhona fired back; "It's not like it will effect you is it! If she loses her career!"

Charity was really riled up by the suggestion that Vanessa losing her job wouldn't matter to her. She'd be utterly gutted for Vanessa and was already angry that the theft occurred in her home. She hoped it was all coming from Rhona and that Vanessa didn't feel like this. The smaller blonde had been a bit quiet with her last night in the pub and had brushed off the idea of Charity heading around to hers after shift. Charity had taken Vanessa at her word though, that she was exhausted and just wanted to get an early night.

"She's my girlfriend!" Charity exclaimed.

"Oh please" Rhona scoffed; "How long until you get bored and move on to the next game?!"

Charity was momentarily aghast. The other woman had no right to make presumptions about how she felt. No doubt she wasn't the only person who doubted Charity's motives, but it still hurt. She had fallen so deep for Vanessa that the accusation that she was only toying with the smaller blonde bloody stung. Her mind was racing, and she barely registered her girlfriends half sister standing up and approaching the bar.

"Hey back off!" Tracy warned the vet.

Rhona didn't seem to care about the other woman's attempted intervention and kept her focus completely on Charity. The angry vet wagged her index finger across the bar at the landlady as she next spoke.

"I told her you were nothing but trouble and surprise surprise…you've probably ruined her life already" Rhona raged.

Ruined her life. Charity had been accused of ruining people's lives before or trying too. It had sometimes been true or close to the truth. Sometimes it had been others taking out their own guilt and shame on her. All her life she had been the screw up; the teenage pregnancy, the prostitute, a pretty rubbish mother, never good enough for Chris Tate and never quite enough for anyone else. She'd kicked and fought against falling for Vanessa because the blonde vet was so…good. When she'd given in to the idea of a relationship between them she had realised that Ness was the one thing that she could possibly get right.

"Well done" Rhona snapped, before swinging around and storming out of the Woolpack.

Charity looked up at the sound of the front door slamming shut. Tracy was stood rigid on the other side of the bar, looking at Charity with concern and sympathy. The other punters though…they were looking with a mixture of shock and entertainment. Apparently, they had enjoyed the free show to go with their pint. She just felt sick. Sick of what people thought of her. Sick of the way people expected her to always fuck up. Sick of being herself. Sick to the stomach that perhaps she really was somehow to blame…that she had already lost the one good thing to happen to her in years.

"Charity…" Faith tried to reach out for her shoulder to comfort her.

"Don't…" Charity snapped, shrugging the hand off.

She couldn't stand being under everyone's gaze any longer. Tears stung her eyes as she turned and made a dash for the bar door. She wanted nothing more than the privacy of her home at the rear of the pub where no one could see her fall apart.

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Vanessa was locking up the vets when her phone buzzed in her pocket. It was Paddy's day off and Rhona had excused herself early because she had no final appointment. It left Vanessa running a little late but luckily Johnny was with her dad and Megan today, so it wasn't such an issue.

Once the door was locked she stuffed her work keys into one coat pocket and retrieved her phone from the other. It was a message from Tracy. Her half sister had been staying at the B&B for the last couple of days which had freed up Vanessa's house again. Not that she had minded her staying over the weekend given the circumstances. It was just good to see Tracy being proactive and getting back on her feet so quickly.

Vanessa opened the message and nearly dropped the phone in shock. According to Tracy, Rhona had gone to the pub and told Charity she had ruined Vanessa's life. Rhona had said it in front of people and Charity was really upset. A second message from Tracy came through instantly, offering to pick up Johnny so she could go to Charity. Vanessa tapped the thumbs up sign in response.

The Veterinary Practice was only a short walk from the pub, so Vanessa started to speed walk in the direction of the Woolpack. As she turned the corner she came face to face with Rhona who was obviously returning from her rant.

"Tracy has just messaged me!" Vanessa barked at the other vet, "What are you playing at?!"

The blonde waved the phone she was clutching in her hand at Rhona, gesturing wildly in frustration. Charity may put a strong front up…. she'd built her walls high…but behind all that bravado was a woman who felt deeply and had been stamped on again and again. She had a horrible feeling that the other vet had probably played on every fear and negative self-image that Charity processed. She was furious with Rhona for blaming Charity. She was furious and defensive that the other woman had hurt her girlfriend.

"Vanessa you are my friend, I just…" Rhona tried to explain. The smaller woman wasn't interested in her excuses.

"You had no right to have a pop at her" Vanessa snapped. "As my FRIEND you should support my choices not try to destroy my relationship because you don't approve."

That was the big fear…that the other vets accusations would send Charity running to the hills. It had taken a while to get Charity to open up enough to have a proper 'strings attached' relationship and it was going really well. They had spent quality time together that didn't just involve sex. There were real signs that they could be so good together…

"Vanessa…" Rhona's voice cut into her thoughts.

The other woman didn't sound like she was about to apologise, and Vanessa didn't have the time or energy to listen to any excuses or anything negative about her girlfriend.

"I REALLY like her" Vanessa emphasised, "I-really-like-her Rhona."

Her friends face fell at her words and she finally looked guilty about what she had done. Vanessa stepped around the other woman and walked away. She'd address it further with Rhona some other time. Now, she needed to find Charity Dingle.

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Vanessa felt everyone's eyes on her as she entered the pub but the expressive green eyes she wanted to see were not present. Instead she was faced with a pensive Faith who was manning the bar alone.

"Where is she?" the vet asked as she rounded the bar.

"Upstairs I think" Faith replied, "we decided it would be best to leave her to you."

Vanessa nodded and headed into the back. The first room she came to, the kitchen and dining area, was empty so Faith was probably right. The vet headed upstairs towards Charity's bedroom. The house was eerily quiet, so it was likely that everyone else was out. Apart from Noah, was likely to be in his room doing homework or playing video games.

When she reached the landing outside Charity's room she took a deep breath, steeling herself for whatever was to come. There was a real chance that her girlfriend's defences could be up, and she'd have to just try not to take it to heart and be patient with her. When she slowly opened the door to the room she decided that the reality was much worse.

Charity was sat up against the headboard of the bed, her knees tucked up to her chin, and she had clearly been (and still was) crying. Vanessa's chest felt like it constricted at the sight and she could barely breathe. She had never seen Charity so upset before and she never wanted to see it again. It was heart breaking.

Ness made it across to the bed without her girlfriend noticing but as soon as she sat down Charity's head shot up. So many emotions flashed across the taller blonde's features that it was hard to gage what she thought of Vanessa's presence. For a moment she had looked relieved to see her but then it had been replaced with something that resembled shame and fear. She shuffled so she was sat next to the other woman and opened her arms to her.

"Come here" she encouraged.

Charity didn't need asking twice and flopped down, lying her head on Vanessa's lap. The smaller woman wrapped her left arm around her girlfriend's midriff and stroked through curled locks of hair with her right hand. She hoped the affectionate contact would calm whatever thoughts were racing through Charity's mind.

"I'm sorry" her girlfriend sobbed.

"You have nothing to be sorry for" Vanessa countered, "Rhona should never have said those things to you…it wasn't your fault."

She didn't know exactly what had been said to Charity, she'd get the full story from Tracy later. She had a pretty good idea though as she'd seen Rhona's expression when explaining the events that led up to the theft of the tranquiliser. The other vet had rolled her eyes at the fact Vanessa had been on her way to a booty call with Charity before being asked to visit the frisky heifer.

"I'm a grown up with a grown-up job remember" Vanessa reassured her girlfriend. "I could have just messaged you about the call out, but I wanted to see you too even if it was only for a few minutes."

Tracy's presence at her home over the weekend had prevented them spending any alone time together and she had missed Charity. She'd missed kissing her, missed being held and touched by her. From how keen Charity had been to see her it was clear the feeling was mutual and that had excited the hell out of Vanessa. They were burning hot for one another and god they had burnt hot in the closed Veterinary Practise later when they had ended up naked on Vanessa's desk. It was a good job they didn't have security camera's inside the building or Paddy could have got another traumatic eyeful.

"You are not angry with me?" Charity asked, her voice muffled by Vanessa's thigh.

"No of course not, why?" she queried.

The vulnerability in Charity's voice hinted that something had happened or had been said which had made the taller blonde ask. Vanessa hoped that Rhona hadn't suggested that she blamed Charity in any way because that really would have crossed a line. Vanessa was frustrated with herself but just because the bag was there didn't mean that Gabby HAD to take something from it. The bag had been in the same room with her the whole time and neither she or Charity had no idea the two girls were hiding in there.

"You didn't want to see me last night" Charity glumly explained after a long pause.

Vanessa froze, the hand that had been gently stroking through her girlfriend's hair stilled. It wasn't just Rhona's words that had hurt Charity…she had hurt her. She hadn't meant to. She genuinely had been tired, and the other woman wouldn't have arrived at her house until after eleven when the pub closed. It wasn't the only reason. Everyone in the village knew that the Dingle's protected their own and Liv was a Dingle. Vanessa had been worried that she'd put a dent in their relationship by breaking that code.

"I thought you would be angry with me for reporting it to the police" she admitted.

Charity sat up, so she was no longer resting in Vanessa's lap, leaning against the smaller blonde so their temples were pressed together. As Charity had first started to move Vanessa had felt like her heart was plummeting to the bottom of her chest. She was scared that Charity was moving away from her. Relief had flooded her when her girlfriend had merely repositioned and kept physical contact with her.

"I want you to do what is best for you" Charity sighed, "I don't want you to get into trouble."

As the taller blonde spoke she reached across them, curling into Vanessa more, and grasped her hand. Vanessa lifted their linked hands and pressed her lips to her girlfriend's knuckles. She felt a bit foolish now for not just talking to Charity in the pub yesterday. She was just so worried about frightening the other woman away whilst everything was so new and fragile between them. Perhaps it wasn't as fragile as she feared. Charity had certainly appeared to be all in ever since she'd agreed they were actual girlfriends.

"What did the police say?" the taller woman inquired.

"They aren't going to investigate me any further" Vanessa replied.

Charity lifted her head a little and smiled, relief washing over her features. Vanessa felt bad breaking that happy bubble because she was FAR from off the hook. She wanted to be open with her girlfriend and maybe, just maybe, Charity was the one person that may be able to make her feel a bit better.

"The Royal College of Veterinary Surgeons are coming to speak to me on the twenty ninth" she added.

Charity ran her thumb against the soft sensitive skin on the inside of Vanessa's thumb. She could always tell when her girlfriend was struggling to formulate what to say or was worried what the answer or reaction to her words would be. Charity fiddled with things, usually beer mats or cups, and looked down rather than making eye contact. This time it was Vanessa's hand she was moving her fingers against.

"What does that mean?" the taller blonde asked.

Charity finally looked up at Vanessa as she finished the question and pursed her lips. She could tell that despite her attempts to reassure her girlfriend, Charity still felt some responsibility for what had happened. The taller woman was fretting at what the outcome could be. Seeing that concern written across Charity's face made Vanessa fall that bit harder for her, if that was even possible.

"At best a slap on the wrists…at worst I could lose my veterinary licence" her voice quavered.

It made her feel sick thinking about it but saying the actual words felt like a gut punch. She had a really horribly feeling that after having a previous incident to her name, they were going to come down hard on her. It was going to be some sort of suspension at least and that would ruin her reputation and finish her career anyway. It would also be a disaster for the practise which would have a negative effect on Paddy and Rhona.

"Try not to presume the worst babe" Charity encouraged gently.

Vanessa nodded, trying to soak the words in. Rhona had said something similar earlier in the day… before running of to go postal on her girlfriend. She'd met the other vet's words with frustration and hostility whereas she wanted to hide within Charity's sentiment. She wanted to hide from the world with Charity. At least for a little while, as Charity really did need to get back to work soon.

"I might need a bit of distracting between now and then" Vanessa admitted.

Or a lot of distracting. Perhaps not during working hours this time, she'd have to reply upon the chinchillas for that. Some after hours distraction would be more than welcome though.

"I can do that" Charity smiled.

The taller blonde followed the smile up with a wink, more playful than lurid. Vanessa released her girlfriend's hand and reached up, brushing away the remains of Charity's tears with her thumbs. She drew the other woman closer and softly kissed her. She hadn't planned on anything more than one kiss but when Charity deepened it…well Faith might have to cover behind the bar for a little while longer.