A/N: Update 2014

I have finally grown as a writer to where I don't hunger for concrit as much as I used to. Feel free to review if you'd like, but that's entirely up to you. :)

A Guinness a Day is Good For You!

By Baby Kat Snophlake

Arche put her fingers to her lips and whistled. Cless, Mint, and Klarth all stopped to turn around. Arche waved from her spot above Chester's head, ignoring the glaring looks he gave her. He was doing just fine crawling up the mountain by himself. He didn't need her or anyone's help.

"Chester, are you okay?" Cless asked.

"Yeah, I'm just being slow." But he covered his headache with his palm. His head wound hadn't quite healed, but this pain was better than staying home even more useless.

"Yeah, you're really holding us back." Arche said, circling on her broom above Chester. "Can't someone just cast heal so we can get moving faster?"

Mint blushed but nodded. "Yeah, let me see what I can do."

"No, wait. Heal isn't good enough." Klarth picked his way around the rocks to stand by Chester and rifled his backpack until he came up with a large brown flask and held it out to Chester. "This will work wonders. You'll feel good in all aspects."

Chester hesitated, but took the flask. He popped off the top and sniffed. "Woah, this smells weird. What is it?"

"Guinness." Klarth replied proudly. "It works wonders."

"What? You're giving him alcohol?" Cless tore the flask from his best friend's hand. "That will make him sick!"

Klarth took back the flask and stuffed the cork back into it. "Fine, let him slow us down."

"No, Klarth, I'll take it."

"Chester! There's better ways to heal, let Mint take care of it." Then Cless began digging through his own bags. "Actually I have gels too. Those work really well."

"Don't waste the supply." Klarth said.

"Don't you have a healing spell that might work better than mine, Cless?" Mint asked. "I've seen you use it before."

Cless shook his head. "I can't use that on anyone else. Why can't you use your spell?"

"Klarth, just give me the Guinness." Chester held out his hand. "I'm not going to waste resources and I refuse to slow you guys down anymore." Klarth obliged, removing the cork for a second time from its flask. Before Cless could rip it from his hands again, Chester downed as much as his stomach could hold. All eyes were focused on him as he assessed the results.

His headache was gone, the welts and stings all over his body dissipated, and he felt a wave of energy flow over him. Whatever ailments he had were now gone. He stood straight up and took a step. "Woah, hey! That stuff's really good." Chester laughed. "Give me some more of that."

An hour later…

"Arche?"

"Yeah, Cless?"

"Would I be a horrible person for pushing Klarth off the edge of this mountain?"

Arche glanced behind her to see Klarth and Chester, shoulder to shoulder with arms around each other, singing loudly off key. Both of them had flasks in their hands and walked like they were trying stand upright on ground that moved. Arche nodded. "Yeah, but I don't think you'll have to worry about pushing Klarth off the mountain. He's wobbling so much, he might just fall off himself."

"Yeah, I've been hoping he would do that for the past hour now. He hasn't yet and I've half a mind to chuck him from the peak if he doesn't any time soon."

Hehe, this creation came from a quick search through FAQ's. Apparently Guinness is akin to a Miracle gel except it rids the body of poison, petrification, and other things. I've always known beer was good for you! Too bad the SNES version of ToP never made it to the US. I would've had a LOT of fun playing it.

-Kat