I was walking on the grounds, towards the lake. The war was over, the light had won, and Voldemort is gone. You'd think that me, Draco Malfoy, son of Lucius Malfoy, would be mad or in Azkaban for that matter. But nope, I couldn't be happier in my life. My mother and I are free. With my father dead we no longer have to live in fear and follow his ways. I probably sound like a heartless ass but you try living with him for seventeen years, being tortured every time you made a wrong move. Yeah didn't think so.

During the war, right at the last minute, I had changed to the light side. I decided that being a Death Eater was not what I wanted to be, the thought of killing innocents made me sick. i wasn't the only one, Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott were right beside me. I mean, if I hadn't switched sides, Fred Weasley would be dead. Yeah you heard it right. I, Draco Malfoy, saved the life of the pranking weasel, Fred Weasley. Just as the spell was about to hit the wall I ran and pushed Fred out of the way just as the wall fell, burying the Death Eater he had been dueling underneath. To say he was shocked would be a way to describe his face as he stared at me, but before he could say anything I just said 'Welcome' and ran to fight.

Ever since that day I've gotten a lot more respect from the Weasleys for saving their family member, especially from the twins. I have even come to the conclusion that the Weasleys aren't as bad as I was lead to believe. After the war I, along with Blaise and Theo, were invited to a party at the Burrow to celebrate.

I learned that Molly Weasley was a very warm woman who welcomed us with open arms, saying that anyone could change. What surprised us most is that even after everything I had done to everyone they had put it behind them and wanted to start new. Now I find myself good friends with Harry and Ron, even though Ron was a little more reluctant in the beginning. Theo is now dating Ginny, which was a surprise to everyone since he's so shy and she's so not. But the biggest surprise was when Blaise and Luna announced their relationship. Yeah…I have no words.

It's now three months into my seventh year, and I am, surprisingly, Head Boy with Hermione Granger as Head Girl, what a surprise! Note the sarcasm. Being heads we have our own common room but it's not as bad as you may think. Ever since I apologized for my actions towards her over the past years we have slowly began a friendship. i like being able to have a intelligent conversation with her and her being able to know what I'm talking about and keep up. She even introduced me to a few muggle books which aren't so bad.

This is why I come out to the lake every day. It gives me time alone to think. As I sit under my favorite oak tree I jump back up, startled. I had sat on something hard that was not the ground. As I look at what it was I realize it's a book. Not just a book, a journal. Now don't get me wrong, I have changed, but there are three things that are tempting me to open it. First, I'm a boy. Second, I'm a Slytherin. Third, I'm a Malfoy. So naturally I picked it up and made myself comfortable. I looked at the cover and froze. On the cover, in neat hand writing, was a name in gold.

Hermione Jean Granger

Crap.

Should I still read it? I thought to myself. I knew it was wrong from the beginning to read someone's journal but now that I know its Hermione's this is a life or death situation. Its either return it so I can live or read it so I can die. Hmm…ah I've been in situations where I could have died, I'll take the chance. I look around me, making sure no one is around, before opening to the first page.

Dear Calvin,

Calvin? Who the hell is Calvin?

It's been so hard here without you. I miss you so much. I have so much to tell you. I know you're looking over me and probably know what's happened since you died but I started this journal as a way to talk to you. To keep that connection we always had. Remember when I was thirteen, right before you died, and I told you that Voldemort would come back one day and that there would be a war? Well he did and there was one. And I fought. Don't get all pissy on me up there. You know I had to. For Harry, for the wizarding world, and especially for myself.

Well, we won. Voldemort is gone for good and we don't have to be afraid anymore. So why aren't I happy? Why do I have to put on a fake smile every day? Why can't I go a whole night without waking up from a nightmare? Why do I jump every time someone touches me or I hear a noise? Why can't I walk somewhere without looking over my shoulder? Why do I feel so…alone?

Everyone is so happy. They're celebrating our victory, moving on with their lives, acting as if there were no dark times, no deaths. But there were. So many people died, so many that were close to me. Dean Thomas especially. You know how close we were. I've known him since we were five years old. We've been through everything together. He was my best friend, my brother. When we were out of Hogwarts we were attached at the hip. Whenever I was sad I went to either you or him and when you died I felt like he was the only one I had. And now he's gone. And I'm alone. Sure I have Harry and the Weasleys and Luna too who's like my sister. But they all have their lives.

Luna is now with Blaise Zabini. Surprising, but cute. Ginny is with Theo and they hardly ever separate from each other. Harry and Ron may be my best friends but you can only spend so much time with them before you want to strangle them. And the only Weasleys I can talk about this to is Fred and George, but they're so busy with their shop that I don't want to get in the way. Mum and Dad don't remember who I am.

I wish you were still here, Calvin. You would know what to do, what to say, how to comfort me. But you're not, and I don't know what to do. I feel so lost. Damn it! I'm Hermione friggin Granger! I'm supposed to be brave, strong, and confident. That's why I wear a mask. I don't want to disappoint anyone by not living up to my expectations. My mask must not crack.

The Ministry wants me to become an Auror. No way in hell. I'm done fighting. Remember how every four years the pastor at church would ask the kids what we wanted to be? At four I said a fairy. At eight I said a princess. At twelve I said a singer. I'm now seventeen years old and I have my answer. After the war there were so many deaths. Not only from the Avada curse, but there were some from things that could have been healed. Lives could have been saved. But there was no one there to save them. That's why I want to become a Healer. I want to be able to save lives and keep families from losing a family member. I want to help wives from losing their husbands, husbands losing their wives, parents from losing their children, children from losing their parents, and more. I don't want people to feel the depression I felt when you were shot, Calvin. I tried to kill myself twice when I lost you and I don't want anyone else to have to go through that. I won't let anyone else go through that.

You know, I'm glad I started writing to you. I know some way you can read this and that gives me comfort. It's good to know that I can still talk to you even if you can't answer me. You're my guardian angel and I love you. I must go now, though. The train just pulled into Hogsmead. I miss you.

Your sister,

Hermione (Brown Eyes)

P.S. I still have that necklace. You are my Sun while I am your Moon (A/N picture on profile)

I closed the book and set it down on my lap, letting all of this information sink in. I never knew she felt this way, I don't think anyone did. But so many questions ran through my head that I started to get a head ach. She has a brother? He died? How has she known Dean since she was five? Why don't her parents know her? She tried to kill herself? How? She's so depressed?

There is a lot more to Hermione Granger than we all thought. The number one question in my mind is where is the true Hermione Granger and how do we get her back? The only way to find out is read the rest of this journal. I know it's wrong but she needs help and I am now determined to help her. With this I stuffed the journal in my bag and walked to the great hall with a new mission to complete. God I'm turning into such a Gryffindor.

What do you think? All my other stories is about Hermione helping Draco so it's a good change yeah? Tell me your opinions and what you think I should add in the story. In later chapters I'll bring in how exactly Calvin died, how Hermione tried to kill herself, and how Draco will try to help. So review and look for my next update. By the way I only own Calvin, the rest belong to J.K Rowling!