Author's Note: Hey I'm back. This is the holidays and I plan to keep on writing. I stopped for a while due to a crazy school semester. But it's holidays again so I'll definitely plan to get the now 3 fictions up and running or better yet finish them. Please enjoy this new story and I play with insanity. Thanks.
Summary: Allen, in a relationship that was killing him slowly with his partner as a Bookman, who can never belong totally to him. Till he met Kanda, a man saying that he wants him, after he breaks him slowly into a mess he can never clean up. Will Allen resist or break under everything? Lavi/Allen/Kanda Lavi/Lenalee
Chapter 1: Beginning
Loud footsteps echoed the dark hallways as a young red haired man walked hurriedly down it. He smoothly slid past people as he gripped tightly on the bouquet of beautiful white lilies. On his handsome face was an uneasy smile which had excitement and anxiety written all over it.
He widened his eyes in recognition before waving his free hand wildly in the air while continuing to walk to the group of equally(or more) anxious people.
It was the day that he had been waiting for eight months.
"How's he doing?" the red haired youngster asked as the group of four people walked nearer to him.
"He's doing just fine from what had heard so far. He took the Forbidden in better than we expected." A man with white hair at the front while black at the back replied with a smile as he glanced back at the room where the person they were talking about was.
"He'll be just fine, Lavi. He's a strong one." A woman in her mid-twenties nodded with an uneasy smile. Her dark eye bags made her seem even more worried than how she usually was.
"Miranda-san, you should take a seat. You look like you're about to collapsed!" a young Chinese man said as he led the woman to a nearby seat. The red haired stared after the Chinese man blankly before raising an eyebrow at the last person of the group. He was a man in his eighties whose eyes still remained clear and focus.
"We needed someone to keep Arystar and Miranda calm. I'm too old to do it." The old man said monotone while Lavi resisted the urge to roll his eyes in front of his Master. Lavi knew better than that. After all, he wasn't to get involve in this. However, nothing got him more worked up then him.
"You are aware," Lavi turned back to his master who stared at him in the eyes. "He isn't going to remember anyone when you enter in. When someone accepts the Forbidden, they give up their former Self. You will just be a stranger to him, just like the rest of us."
Lavi looked at his master for a while before turning back to the door. A dead and uneasy silence fell onto them. The master closed his eyes in defeat. This apprentice of his, was the most rebellious soon to be Bookman in history of Bookmen. Not only did he break a rule, he had even taken in a Precious.
"A Bookman with a Precious will have no happy ending, Lavi. Even 'Lavi' isn't your real name which you have thrown long ago. You would be making he live a life filled with lies and pain. Saying this now may already be too late, but at least you still can pass your License of this Precious to another. You do want him to be happy, right?" the old man continued before he stopped, his face not changing or showing any expression as the sharp tip of a hammer like weapon appeared a millimeter away from his throat. The one named Lavi, holding it as he continued to stare at the door.
"I know what I did. I know what awaits me. I know what awaits him. Did you think I didn't consider them all before making him my Precious? Did you think I myself didn't give him a choice whether he wanted to be what he is now? Don't mock me." Lavi glared at his master, suppressed anger reflecting in those strong emerald eyes.
The door of the room the group was waiting outside of opened, causing everybody to turn and look at the one whom they were waiting for. A boy no older than fifteen walked out, head bandaged up and bowed. He had a white gown on which was tainted with blood and water marks which the others suspected were tears. Despite his appearance, the group, led by Lavi, ran over to him.
Lavi held the younger boy tightly before kissing his bandaged head oh so gently. The boy immediately clenched onto him. Unable to take it anymore, Lavi quickly stood back and unwrapped the bandages. It slowly fell onto the ground softly. The others gasp at the changed features of the boy while Lavi remained indifferent; smiling lovingly as he caressed the lovely face he loved so dearly.
The honey brown hair had turned silvery white while a weird lightning like scar with a pentacle on the top was placed on his left eye area. As the younger boy opened his eyes slowly, the eyes Lavi remembered as brownish gold had turned into bluish silver. From afar, if the boy remained still, many would have mistaken him for a doll.
The doll like boy blinked several times before looking around. Lavi could tell that he had no idea where he was due to the confusion written in those beautiful eyes. Lavi patiently waited for the boy's eyes to fall onto him. Lavi blinked when tears fell from those eyes he adored so much and the boy hugged him tighter than before.
"……vi…" The red haired youngster widened his eyes in shocked before he quickly pushed the boy away from him, only to have the boy struggle to get as close to his chest as possible. Did he just hear the boy call his name?
"Surprised?" Lavi's head snapped up to the second newcomer, along with the others. The man was a tall guy with flaming long red hair and a goatee. He leaned against the door as he lit a cigarette. He breathed in through the cigarette before releasing a puff.
"He can remember?" Lavi whispered in shock as he held onto Allen tighter. Others stared in astonishment when the smoking man nodded.
"An Exceptionist is made when people do not follow the correct order of making a Precious." The smoking man explained. His eyes slowly moved to stare down at the Exceptionist who was holding onto the red haired youngster.
"Precious are humans who were made into life partners of beings that can live up to a thousand years, such as us, Methuselahs. The humans would be able to live as long as their Bonders and will only die when the Bonder dies.
You, boy, are the first out of the Bookman clan to make a Precious, a drifter that is like the presence of the wind, with no attachment. If you were to take in a lover, it would be wise to have made him or her a Precious, who would stay loyal to you no matter how many times you will hurt them due to your job. His past would be erased and his everything would be link to you.
At least, that was the plan……" The man trailed off as he took small steps to where Lavi was, before bending in front of the boys, looking the red haired youngster in the eye.
"He's been tainted, wasn't he?" The man whispered into Lavi's ears, leaving the others wondering what he was saying while the Exceptionist tensed at the words. Lavi remained indifferent. He glared at the man before standing up, with the younger boy in his arms.
"Other than the fact he can remember his past, there is nothing else out of the ordinary, right? If that's so, I'll be taking my leave." Lavi coldly said before he walked away from the group and the man, as he carried his Precious away. The flaming red haired man stared after him while the rest of the group chased after him.
"An Exceptionist and a Bookman, huh?" The man took a long drag from his cigarette. He looked up at the ceiling and breathed out.
"Those two might be destined to be the next Romeo and Juliet."
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Ten years passed since that day he decided to give up everything for this Methuselah. Allen couldn't help but recall as he spread a little butter on a slice of bread and placed it into the toaster with an already done one. He then went to make some scrambled eggs and sausages. He was in fact, trying to keep himself busy and distracted from what was happening upstairs in a certain bed room where a Methuselah was.
With a certain client.
Allen squeezed his eyes tightly shut as he hugged himself. Many questions always filled his mind at this time. Why? Why did he still have memories intact? Why couldn't he be like a normal Precious who would feel nothing of betrayal and hurt?
He already knew that Lavi was a Bookman and had no choice but to do this as it was his job but it still hurt so much to see him with another. Even if there was no love in the act or anything, there were times Allen felt the urge to scream so badly. But he was not going to do that, he made his choice and this was what he was going to live with, as long as the other person still cared for him.
Footsteps were heard coming down the stairs snapped Allen out of his train of thoughts, making him quickly get ready the breakfast for the two newcomers in the room. In a matter of seconds, the red haired Bookman whose looks remained unchanged since the day Allen met him walked entered the room, a woman clinging onto him as they sat down at the kitchen table.
Allen tried to remain indifferent as the woman whined and giggled like an airhead next to Lavi while he placed the food on the table for them. Allen's eyes threaten to twitch as the girl hugged Lavi's arm ever so close to her chest that her breast were pressed so closely against his arm. Really, have the girls in this generation degraded themselves till they were like sluts? Allen couldn't help but wonder.
Allen then sat down at the kitchen counter, eating only cereal and milk as he started to read his World History book. He had made it a point to sit away from Lavi when a client was there. He would feel extremely awkward and appalled when people like the girl that was currently at the table with the Methuselah is flirting right in front of his eyes.
"Lavi, did you know? The cheerleading squad is having a practice for your big game tomorrow night? Would you like to come to see? We did a special something for you. Especially you." The girl said as she leaned closer to the red haired youngster's, description based on his looks, ear with a seductive smile. Allen lifted the book off the table to have it cover his face so as not the show his out of control twitching eyebrow.
"Haha. I'll like to make it but I made plans to help Allen with something." Allen heard the Methuselah reply, feeling his emerald eyes on him as he continued to hide his face behind the big thick book.
"Ha? If this is about the class duty thing that the teacher just started, I'll get my friend to help take over your place. I'm sure Allen doesn't mind. Right?" the girl said with a tone filled with authority to Allen who had finished his cereal and who going towards the sink to clean up.
"Do what you like." Allen said without turning back, washing the bowl and spoon quickly. Allen could feel Lavi's eyes still on him as he washed, as if hoping Allen would look back at him. "As long as I'm not the only one doing it, it's fine by me."
"Then it's settled!" The girl happily exclaimed with a clap. She stood up and reached into her bag to pull out a small makeup kit. "Could I use the bathroom for a moment? I need to freshen up." She said before kissing Lavi's cheek and rushing off before Lavi could even give her permission. When both heard the bathroom door closed shut, Lavi sighed, causing Allen to turn.
"Lavi, it's okay. I mean it's the job right?" Allen reassured him as he walked over to Lavi, picking up his bag on the way. Lavi frowned deeply.
"Allen, we haven't been together for one moment for the past year. I would really like to spend some time alone with you even if it means cleaning up a classroom or two." Lavi pouted sadly as he munched on his sausage like a child being told he couldn't have dessert. "I've missed you." Allen's eyes softened when Lavi's free hand took his and gave it a squeeze. Allen squeezed his back in response.
"I got to get going. Kanda's going have my head if I don't go early for class duty." Allen whispered lovingly to his Bonder and was about to leave when Lavi, whose hand is still holding onto Allen's, pulled the younger onto his lap. Allen gasped in surprise and before he knew it, he was being fiercely attacked by the lips. As quickly as it came, Lavi pulled back, leaving both boys panting.
"Fine, I'll wait for you after Student Council meeting." Allen pouted, leaving a very happy Lavi who cheered and cuddled Allen closer to him. "Now let go or your client is going to have a good gossip to spread in school."
"Hell, she wouldn't. Cause that'll mean she was a bad laid that pushed me into becoming gay." Lavi said happily with a smirk and a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Allen raised an eyebrow when he noticed Lavi kept rubbing his ear and gave an evil smile.
"Screamer?"
"The girl just thinks that men enjoy getting our ear drums tortured." Lavi whined childishly as Allen patted his head in sympathy and kissed his ears better. "Thank god the file on her is going to be over soon. I swear I've been hearing ringing sounds since the assignment was given to me."
"Bear with it ok. Put the dishes at the sink, I'll clear them when I get back." Allen pecked Lavi's cheek before standing up, to only still feel Lavi's hand holding him in place. "Lavi, if we remain like this, the results will be quite disastrous." Allen whispered with urgency in his voice but he stopped when Lavi's eyes reflected something that he would only show when Allen was around.
"You still love me right?" Lavi whispered, like a child begging to be loved as he encircled his arms around Allen's middle as he looked up at the Exceptionist. Allen looked down at the child like Bookman and remained silent. "A Bookman has to do everything in his power to get the records. From being as low life as a prostitute to being as pathetic as a person who has to eat his own shit, I will not being able to belong to anyone or anything."
"Well, it's been ten years and I'm still here, aren't I?" Allen smiled down at the Bookman as he kissed the top of his head. "If I have stopped loving you, I would have left, destroying the License you received for having a Precious like me. Lavi, I knew what I was getting into before I became your Precious. As long as you still love me, as long as you still need me, I'll be here for you, till the day you decide to leave me. That's why, don't need to ask, no need to feel insecure, just concentrate on your job with ease that I'll be waiting for you at the end." Allen murmured into Lavi's ear as he stroked Lavi's head comfortingly before he moved away from the Bookman. "I'm going off now. See you later."
Lavi managed out a small smile to return Allen's comforting one as the white haired Precious rushed out, obviously late for morning class duty. When the door slammed shut, Lavi's smile immediately vanished. When was the last time that they actually sat down together at the same table with no one around? Lavi pursed his lips and closed his eyes as the feelings that he had bottled up threatened to spill out.
Tens years, ten years since they made their bond official. During these ten years, assignments were constantly given to him ever since he officially became a Bookman. He had to entertain and sleep with so many of the people he was assigned to. Lavi always in his mind as he bedded them asked so many questions.
Why isn't her hair silvery white?
Why is his voice so low?
Why isn't this man's hand deformed?
After these sessions, Allen would be sitting outside patiently, waiting with a towel and a set of new clothes for both Lavi and the client. Allen's smile would still be there but there would be a slight shaking at the sides. Allen would accompany Lavi as he bathed, Lavi in the tub while Allen sat on a stool helping him get cleaned. If it weren't for knowing Allen was so long, Lavi wouldn't have notice Allen gripping he sponge more tightly then necessary, he wouldn't have noticed Allen's hand having the slight shaking as he helping him get clean, wouldn't have sensed Allen's tears threatening flow out as he patiently sat next to him, washing the soiled body of his.
Allen probably didn't know of this, but Lavi had caught him several times crying at a corner when Allen thought nobody was around. Lavi still remembered the shoulders that shook slightly as Allen tried to get them to stop moving, the harsh breathing and the soft sobs that wrecked through the Precious's body. But despite it all, the Precious still waited up for him and welcomed him back with open arms, with a smile that made everything seemed as if it was going to be alright.
Lavi was contented that Allen was always there. Lavi was grateful that Allen, no matter how soiled and dirty he was still held him so lovingly. Lavi was unbelievably fortunate that Allen was able to love someone who could never be able to belong to him.
Lavi was afraid that one day Allen would finally break and he wouldn't be able to be there to hold Lavi anymore.
"Lavi, sorry for making you wait." The unwanted girl cheerily chirped as she reentered the room and sat next to him.
That's not your seat, get off it.
"We're finally alone." The girl grinned mischieviously as she hugged Lavi's arm, pressing her soft breast against his arm.
Get off, get away, and don't press those near me.
"I was really waiting for Allen to get out. He's a nice guy and all but I just wanted us to have some private time and all, I'll pay him back later." She whispered in a low tone as she pressed her lips against Lavi's, which Lavi forced himself to return.
Lavi was afraid.
That one day, Allen would walk out the door and never come back to hold him again.
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Allen looked out of the classroom window as he wiped the windows clean. The people in charge of duty in the morning were mostly jocks who just dumped the work on him and were out playing before lesson started. Allen got used to the trend; after all, six years pretending to be a high school kid in different schools tends to make you get the message. Cleaning wasn't a foreign thing to him; it had become his profession if he were to describe it.
Footsteps behind him made him turn his head as one of the students who still cared for the rules walked in, hair slightly messy while eyes shone with irritancy walked towards him with a bucket of clean water. Allen just closed his eyes at the boy and turned back to his job.
"The idiot class inspector wants me to clean the curtains." The new comer grumbled as he unhooked the curtains angrily. "He said you'll rip it if you did it yourself." He scowled as he threw the dusty grey curtains into the water.
"Yeah, sorry." Allen managed out an awkward smile as he continued to clean the windows. "Me and fabrics don't match well."
The ripping of the bed sheets off the bed sounded out loudly as mismatched hands pulled and yanked. The owner gritted his teeth as he pulled on them like his life depended on it. When the sheets were finally off, his hands shook madly as he looked at the ripped up sheets and then to the naked king sized mattress. He scowled deeply.
"It's still dirty."
"Oi!! What are you looking at?" Allen jumped when the newcomer were standing next to him. Allen stuck his tongue out at the taller male as he walked away from the window.
"Nothing that concern you, Kanda." Allen shot back at the boy named Kanda as he rinsed the cloth in the bucket of the water. "Can't a guy daze out once in a while? Oh wait, your head's so empty that it's already in a daze itself." Allen muttered, only to get a hand fisting up his front and being pressed against the window he had just cleaned.
"I dare you to say that again, you little moyashi." Kanda spit the words out with acid covering each word. Allen was about to say something when he was blinded by something shiny.
"What the-?!" Allen exclaimed before he was dropped to the floor like a bag of potatoes. When Allen could finally focus his eyes, he saw Kanda stuffing something into his pocket hastily. "What are you hiding?"
Lips moved against each other as a couple laid on the bed as hands roamed each other's bodies. Gasps and moans as the moonlight shone, trying to get pass the translucent curtains to the couple's body. When the two finally distanced away for a little while, the bottom one's hand touched the other's cheek and stroked it lightly.
"This isn't going to work out, is it?"
"None of your business." Kanda snapped at Allen before roughly grabbing the bucket of dirty water and curtains and stormed out of the room, causing water to spill onto the floor, leaving Allen with more work to do.
"Pffft. Girly boy who PMSes every day." Allen grumbled as he threw a rag on the floor to soak up one of the puddle on the floor.
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"And that concludes the meeting." Lavi ended the Student Council meeting with a sigh of relief as the other students stood up and gathered the paperwork which was going to be dumped somewhere unless really needed as they thanked each other for working hard. Allen remained seated as he looked out of the window. His expression was blank while his eyes reflected the blue sky with the white puffy clouds around.
Lavi slowly shut the door and turned the lock as he turned, leaning against the door staring at the Precious. Staring at Allen like this always placed him in a dream state. It was enlightening, it was beautiful. Like a painting, Allen was beautiful to see as he watches the sky above, like expecting something to come.
A red haired youngster walked in a bookstore as he shrugged his coat off. He nodded politely with a smile on his face to the owner before walking around, searching for something. He walked slowly and quietly to through the rows of dusty shelves, deeper and deeper, till he reached an area not many people know of and it was like a world where dust bunnies roam. He crouched down behind a shelf and carefully removed a book. He stared through the empty space where the book was and smiled.
There sat a boy no older than fourteen looking out of the window with a book lying on his chest. He sat there quietly, blank expression just looking up into the beautiful blue sky. The red youngster only wished to add a pair of white wings on the boy's back to complete the beautiful picture.
Allen gasped lightly when two familiar yet foreign arms came around him and embraced him. Allen just leaned back into the embrace and turned to meet emerald green ones. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment before Lavi broke the eye contact they had and nuzzled Allen's neck, while Allen kissed the top of his head.
Suddenly a scent crept itself into Allen's nostrils. His eyes widened a little as harsh reality hit him hard. The client's scent, though faint, was still on Lavi. Allen laughed weakly mentally as his hands fell slowly from Lavi's head.
"That girl's waiting," Allen murmured into Lavi's hair as he felt Lavi lift him up and settled him onto his lap. Lavi cuddled Allen closely to his chest causing Allen to sigh.
"I don't care."
"Your assignment?"
"Allen, it's been a year since we have had any quality time, may I remind you. I doubt you can even fit me in anymore!!!" Lavi whined loudly before coughing after Allen smacked his tummy hard.
"Yeah, I'm horny and whatever but you got to finish your assignment before you can do anything else." Allen flicked Lavi's forehead, earning a whimper from the Bookman. Allen couldn't help but chuckle at him while Lavi continued to hug him like a teddy bear. "Oh my gosh, you're like a little kid for someone who just passed one hundred and eighty. Hurry up and get your assignment done so I can get some."
"But I want my milk!!!!" Lavi whined again but dodged the punch that was supposed to land on his left eye. A sudden knock on the door shook the couple out of their lovey dovey. However, before Lavi went to the door, he pulled Allen in for one passionate kiss, leaving the boy breathless. "I'll definitely finish it and getting some with you tonight. So please wait up."
Lavi smirked at the flushed red lover of his before he unlocked the door, revealing Kanda, all pissed off behind the pile of paperwork he was carrying.
"Whoa!! Yuu, need help there?" Lavi cheerfully asked as Kanda quickly walked into the room and dumped the pile onto the table.
"Yeah. That crazy cheerleader you're dating is going about the hall looking for you. Please, get her to stop screaming, it'll do us a hell load of good." Kanda grumbled out angrily as he sat on one of the chair to rest. Lavi blinked before rushing out, slamming the door shut due to his rush.
A hand went up and twisted the lock shut for the second time that day. The owner continued to stare at the door before turning around to face Kanda who was looking back at him.
"I'm going to go insane soon." Allen whispered as he walked towards Kanda and leaned against the table.
"That's what I'm here for." Kanda muttered softly as he place his index finger at the bottom of the pile. "You're like this pile of paper. Slowly piling up so high that its getting dangerous. For me," Kanda applied pressure to the pile, causing the paper to slip and scatter about as the fall. "I'm waiting to collect up all the pieces you'll become. Little by little, slowly and carefully."
"Hoping to see me in a mess. You're cruel." Allen scowled at Kanda who smirked back at him.
"But you liked it, didn't you?" Kanda chuckled darkly as he trapped Allen slowly and whispered to his ear. "After all, we're the ones who started it together."
"Please make a mess out of me." A whisper so desperate the Asian man chuckled and complied. "Make me burn. Kill me please."
"Messing with my head, mocking me then taking advantage of me. What do you want from me?" Allen spat at Kanda who suddenly slammed Allen's head on the table, hard. Allen shut his eyes due to the pain and impact of the wood against his face. When he opened his eyes, he saw a shiny razor knife right in front of his eyes.
"I want to see you, mind broken and shaking, being molded into something of mine." Kanda said dangerously low as the knife drew closer towards Allen's eyes.
A soiled up white haired teen, laid on the bed with blanket clenched closely to his chest continued to look away from the Asian as he was held from behind. The Asian chuckled a little before he whispered in Allen's ear.
"Be mine."
Author's Note: I decided to play and explore a little bit of insanity. I hope you like it so far. I'll continue with the other fictions as well. Read and review please.