Title: Of Course Not
Summary: Hiei is fed up with Kurama teasing him about a human custom, and asks Yuusuke about it. But when he's told what 'kissing' means, will he ever talk to Kurama again?
Warnings: Shounen-ai (nothing stronger than kissing), slash
Other: This was inspired by a doujinshi I read one day, called 'KISS' by Arina Toshimi. Credit where credit is due and all that.
This could take place at any point in the YYH timeline prior to Yuusuke going Mazoku, so I'll leave that up to you. =) The title is an implied 'alternate/extra' line you could add to the bottom of the fic.
And please, no comments about 'Of course Hiei would know what kissing is!' In my story, he gets the physical side of it (meaning it feels nice and is a bit sexual) but it's the emotional side (love and all that) that he doesn't understand and Kurama thinks will scare him away. And with how emotionally awesome he is in the series, I can't blame Kurama. And I've just realised how invested I've gotten into a one-shot.
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Smiling down at the smaller demon, Kurama felt a rush of smug pleasure as he saw him breathing heavily with a flushed face and puffy lips.
"You still haven't told me the purpose of this ningen ritual," Hiei complained petulantly.
Kurama chuckled, but felt a pang of fear at the thought of Hiei openly rejecting him. "And I will, Hiei, in my own time. What's your rush? Why, one would think you're interested in learning more about humans. If you're so impatient to know, why not ask Yuusuke or Kuwabara?" He teased, hoping the fire demon wouldn't call his bluff.
"Hn. I think I just might." His image flickered and vanished out the open window. The red-haired youth sighed as he leaned against a wall. It had been good while it lasted, but he knew that Hiei would reject any form of affection that was offered to him, so much so that he had ended up having to trick him into kissing.
The smaller demon wasn't stupid by any means – he knew there was a physical need being satisfied by the lip-locking – but it was the emotional side of it that would scare him away.
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Seeing Yuusuke walking along the streets below him, Hiei's mind went back to Kurama's tease. He knew the fox was bluffing and hoping he wouldn't call him on it, and until now, he hadn't even considered it an option. He'd only left to show that he was in charge.
But now curiosity he blamed on Kurama's presence reared its head and nudged him to ask the Detective. The Oaf had never been an option, and even the Detective might mock him for ignorance in what seemed to be a very common human custom. Glancing around, he could see at least six pairs engaging in the activity.
Landing beside Yuusuke, he smirked to see him jump and hear his muttered curses. "Damn it, Hiei! You gotta do that?"
He ignored him as usual. "I have a question about a human custom." As he'd expected, the boy screwed up his face at the idea of knowing something.
"And you're not asking Kurama because...?"
"He's being himself." Meaning conceited, arrogant, and condescending.
Yuusuke snorted, he knew the behaviour in question quite well. "So, uh, what was the question?"
"When human press their mouths together, what does it mean?"
Yuusuke frowned. Hiei couldn't mean CPR... His eyes went wide. "You mean kissing?" The demon gave a small shrug – Kurama had never named it – but nodded slightly at a couple that were making out.
"Like that."
"Uh, yeah. It's called kissing." He said, wondering not for the first time how old the small demon really was. No question that he was wise in the ways of battle and survival, but he was quite juvenile not only in size, but whenever it came to love and feelings. "Two people do it when they find each other attractive and care about each other."
"Care?" He didn't sound happy.
"Yeah, when you like-like someone." Yuusuke winced at the look Hiei gave him at the childish slang he'd accidentally slipped in. "Sometimes it's love, or a really big kind of like. You really should ask someone else this stuff, you know?" He finished, a little frustrated.
"Hn, you're no use," Hiei said with a huff, as he vanished from sight.
"You're welcome," Yuusuke yelled after him, "you ungrateful shit!" Sighing, he was very grateful he hadn't had to give Hiei the demonic birds and bees. Vultures and wasps? He thought about it, then a grin spread over his face.
He really hoped that job was either already done, or would be left for Kurama to explain. He needed to be taken down a peg or two recently.
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Kurama felt Hiei's presence before he saw him. "Hello again, Hiei," he said, keeping his voice carefully neutral.
The shorter demon tilted his head. "Aren't you going to use that human greeting custom you're so fond of?" He asked suspiciously.
Pleasantly surprised, Kurama supposed that Hiei had just double-bluffed him – or tried to at least. Stooping down into a long kiss with him, he smiled as he ended it. "So, did you ask Yuusuke?"
Hiei snorted derisively. "No, I didn't."