As I sat beside his bedside all my mistakes suddenly rushed in. Nothing I had done was acceptable, nothing, and I couldn't fight the feeling that the only reason I was sitting here at this moment was all my fault. Soul shouldn't be here, he shouldn't be this hurt, my fingers ran through his snow white hair as a tear rolled down my cheek, none of this should be happening.

As I closed my eyes I prayed that when I opened them all of this would be gone, but it doesn't work that way. When I opened my eyes all I saw before me was a boy, his eyes were shut and his body was still.

I held his hand close to my face and just began to cry, "I want it all to be over, Soul, I'm so sorry this is all my fault, I should've never dragged you into my mess." I was speaking quietly to myself hoping he would somehow hear me, but he was just as still as before. "This is bad; I don't know what to do… I promise I'll wait here with you, I won't leave you."

"You better not leave me, I mean it is your fault after all," a weak voice said. When I looked up I saw it was Soul, and the smile on his face reassured me that he was indeed joking. But I didn't care whether he was joking or not, just to hear him talk was enough for me to throw myself across his chest and let all the tears that I had left rain from my eyes. His lips were warm as he placed the gently on my forehead and he ran his fingers through my hair. And with that one gesture he said it, "I love you, Maka, don't forget that, ok?" and his body fell motionless once more and his head sank back into his pillow. But I didn't move, I still sat with my face in his chest and my hand in his, I didn't want to move and I don't think I could. Why is this all happening, why now?

"Don't leave me, Soul!" I cried into his shoulder. "I need you, please don't do this to me" I couldn't take it any longer; I lifted my head from his body and for one last time ran my hand across his cheek. "Don't leave me," I repeated, "Please."

"He's sleeping," a voice spoke from the other side of the room, "and from what I can see I'd say he'll live, you don't have anything to worry about." This time it was the voice was closer, and now I could feel a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to see who it belonged to and saw Kidd who was smiling down on me; I had never seen him look so caring.

"Kidd…" I whispered. "Why are you here?"

"I came to check on you guys," he sat down on the chair beside me that I had completely ignored when I rushed in to see Soul. "I heard what happened, how are you holding up?"

This was weird; I've never had a conversation like this with Kidd. Well I've actually never shown my real feelings to anyone but Soul, I looked at Soul's calm face. "I'm ok, Kidd," I looked back at him, "thanks."

After awhile Kidd and I made our way out to the others; Tsubaki and Black Star were playing basketball against Liz and Patty. They had already started a game so we decided to watch. It had just occurred to me what Soul had said to me earlier, he told me he loved me, that was the last thing he said before he fell back asleep. That should've been the moment I told him how I felt, how I don't ever stop thinking about him and how I can't imagine life without him. What if he doesn't come back alive and I never get to talk to him again? I wouldn't be able to tell him how I feel, I don't think I'd be able to live with myself, oh what am I going to do? I must have been making a face to relate to how I feel because Kidd got concerned again.

"Maka?" he asked. "Are you ok?"

"Kidd," I stammered. "I don't feel too good; do you think you could walk me home?" He hesitated for a second, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked." I began to stand up but stumbled a bit, "I can walk home by myself."

"Maka, wait," he grabbed my hand. "I just don't know where you live," his smile was cute when he said that; he almost looked innocent. We started walking but it was quiet, I felt as if I should've just walked by myself because it was beginning to feel really awkward. But sure enough Kidd was here to break the silence. "So how many souls have you gotten?" I wasn't positive but I was pretty sure that Kidd was trying to start small talk. Most people talk about the weatherr or something else lame like that, but I guess when you're raised by Shinigami-Sama you don't really have anything like small talk.

I was trying not to laugh at what I had just concluded when I answered his question, "a little bit over 30. We would've gotten more… but." My eyes started to drift away from his because I knew I was about to cry.

"Maka…" he put his hand on my lower back and pulled me in a hug. "It'll be ok."

My eyes shut as my tears rolled out my eyes and down his neck. Now his other hand was placed gently on my head and his head also laid softly on mine. I couldn't help but feel safe in his arms as his warmth was felt. Then I began to feel something else; it was in the pit of my stomach like butterflies. I had felt it once before when I first met Soul… Soul… Soul!

I quickly backed away from Kidd once I remembered Soul, "Kidd, we don't have to talk about this."

He looked surprised and it made me feel bad, now that feeling in my stomach was sickness. "Of course, I'm sorry."

We kept walking and soon enough we got to my house. "Well this is it," I said as I turned around to Kidd. He still had a sad look on him face which made me feel terrible, why can't I do anything right? I had to fix it though; so I put my hand on his arm and smiled up at him and said, "I'm sorry for pushing you away earlier I'm just not good at talking about sad stuff like that."

He smiled and looked sort of relieved, "Ok, good. That's sort of a relief actually;" he smiled and scratched the back of his head."

I smiled back, "Oh really, why's that?"

"I just," he began and looked away. "I don't want things to get weird between us."

I was sort of confused; I didn't understand why he was saying that but then I remembered the feeling I got when Kidd held me. I wonder if he had the same feeling, I had to find out. "Why would things get weird between us, Kidd?"

He looked back down at me and his face was way more serious than the silly smile he wore before, "because, well, Maka, that hug before, I don't know what it meant to you, but that wasn't just a hug for me."

I knew it. I didn't know what to say but the silence was killing me, I can't tell him that I don't feel the same way because that would be a lie, but I'm not sure how I really do feel. "I… uh…" that's all I managed to get out before he put his hand slowly behind my ear and moved in closer.

I don't know what it is with this boy but whenever he gets close to me I can't breathe. Maybe this is something different, maybe it is something new; but how can I be sure? How can I be sure about anything? I looked into his amber eyes and saw myself in the reflection. He really is this close, is he about to kiss me? And right as I asked myself that question it happened. He leaned in barely an inch closer and pressed his lips against mine, the feeling I felt then was as though the whole world froze and my heart had skipped a thousand beats.

All I could feel was his lips; they were warm and soft, like a pillow. This was the first time this had ever happened to me; I had never been kissed until that very moment and I always thought Soul would be my first kiss. But no; it was Kidd, and at this moment I was perfectly alright with that. The lock between our lips began to fade and he moved his face away from mine. For what seemed like hours we starred at eachother in the eye waiting for what was going to happen next.

He began to open his mouth to say 'I'm sorry' but before he could say it I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him again and whispered in his ear, "I forgive you."

THE END: CHAPTER 1