Whoo...Another Bleach Fanfic - hopefully I won't forget about it and it shall contiune! Anyways, the inspiration came from...well, I have no idea, actually. :-P.
But I want to say thanks to Nikitadarkstar for betaing - She was a major help and I really apperciate her taking the time, energy and effort to go through and correct my mistakes. Thanks a lot hun! So, I would just like to say, please read and enjoy, leave reviews and (polite!) criticism for me to improve. Thank you. :)
EDIT: Ahaha, would you look at that. Apparently if you have mutiple drafts in the document, it combines it in a mess of a story. Oh, isn't that a hoot? Hopefully this fixes it, cause if not, I'm gonna be pissed. Thank to you to Kana090 for pointing it out to me.
EDIT 2: Ahaha...I hate FF. I seriously do. I had to go back and correct it all "by hand". sonofabitch.
Kenpachi Zaraki had never been good at masking his impatience. As the weekly Captains meeting drew to an end , Zaraki impatiently drummed his thick fingers against the table, tilting his chair back on its hind legs, like an obnoxious student in class.
Yamamoto-Genryūsai was either ignoring Zaraki's immature behavior, or really was oblivious to it. The other captains took notice though, several casteglares in the direction of the 11th division captain.
Zaraki heaved another sigh and Soifon shot him her nastiest look. Byakuya Kuchiki glared disdainfully while Komamura frowned at Zaraki's disrespect towards Yamamoto. But Zaraki didn't really give a rat's ass about the other captains or what the old man was blathering on about. He knew how to run his damn division, and he couldn't care less about what the other divisions were doing.
"So, Interdivision training will be held again in 300 years." Yamamoto wheezed. "You are dismissed." He waved a wrinkled hand at the 12 captains sitting in front of him. Chairs were silently pushed back as the distinguished leaders of the Soul Society stood to leave.
"Finally!" Zaraki muttered loudly, his chair falling back onto all fours with a loud thunk. He shoved his chair back, standing, and whipping around, elbowing Mayuri Kurotsuchi out of his way. Nobody noticed Retsu Unohana had remained seated at the table, patiently looking at her folded hands.
"Ahem." The 4th division healer quietly cleared her throat, and lifted her face to direct a pointed, reminding look to Yamamoto. The old man lifted a white eyebrow in question, before realizing something.
"Ah, excuse me!" He called out to the departing captains. The eleven stopped and turned around, a questioning look plastered on each of their faces. "Captain Unohana has an announcement to make. Please stay a moment longer." Unohana graced him with a sweet smile before looking at her fellow captains.
"Forgive us for almost leaving, Captain Unohana." Komamura apologized with a short bow, immediately returning to his seat to respectfully listen to what the quiet woman had to say. The other captains slowly returned to their seats as well, except for Kenpachi who remained standing.
Hegripped the back of his recently-vacated seat, grumpily complaining. "What is it? If this is some 4th division bullshit announcement about new medication or something, I don't care. I gotta get ta' Yachiru. Brat's probably killed all yer' other vice cap'ns by now." He smirked with a chuckle. "The'r all damn pansies anyways. Anyways, whatever yer' gonna blabber about ain't gonna apply to me." Several glares were directed at him again, but none spoke except for Unohana.
"Oh, this will apply you the most, Captain Zaraki." Retsu said in her soft, serene voice. She smiled sweetly up at him, not even a blink of impatience or offense. "You and your division visits mine the most out of all the divisions, to get mended for their injuries." That seemed to shut Kenpachi up, as he scowled at her, and then yanked out his chair and threw himself back down like a cranky child. Unohana continued like nothing had happened.
"My division has opened a, branch, you could call it, behind our main building. We will now be running a treatment and health springs spa. It is another way of healing and treating wounded and tired bodies, during this war."
Zaraki snorted loudly, interrupting again. "Big friggin whoopty-fuckin-do. This still has nothing to do with me!"
"Silence your insolence!" Komamura spoke defensively. The fox-man glowered at Zaraki who scowled right back.
"Why don't YOU shutup, ya great big hairball?" Zaraki snapped.
Konamaru jumped to his feet before he could stop himself, gritting his teeth and barring his muzzle. Fists clenched, he growled and his yellow eyes flashed dangerously. But he brushed the insult aside, instead responding coolly, "Captain Unohana is talking. Do not interrupt her."
"Thank you Captain Konamaru." Retsu calmly pacified, flashing her sweet smile at him. Konamaru slowly sank down, glaring at Zaraki who merely sneered in return.
"As I was saying, a health spa has opened in addition to our own building for healing. I would love it if each captain could spend a day there, a week from today. As everyone in Seireitei will soon be able to use it, I would like the Captains and their lieutenants to attend first. Senior seated officers are welcome as well." Unohana finished, settling back and smiling serenely at everyone else. With that look, it was hard to refuse her, even though nobody did.
Well, except for Zaraki.
Kenpachi snorted and shoved his chair back again, standing up. "The hell I'm going. I ain't gonna get caught at some sissy, funny scented bath house." The glares once again turned onto an unnoticing Kenpachi.
"I would very much like you to come as well." Unohana said patiently. Her serene smile shone up at Zaraki who didn't notice the underlying threat veiled in her sweet voice.
Kenpachi snorted again. "Yah, there's a difference in likin' me to come and makin me." He challenged brassily. He turned to leave, back facing the healer. Unohana turned her gaze to Yamamoto, silently communicating with him. The General nodded at her and announced; "It's mandatory." Zaraki stop dead in his tracks.
Zaraki's face took on a look of horror but the pause was interrupted by Shunsui Kyoraku's delighted chortle.
"Wonderful! I can't wait to bring Nanao!" The flamboyant man smiled dreamily, clapping his hands together. Two seats away, Soifon rolled her eyes in disgust.
Kenpachi blanched. "I can't go!" His voice sounded slightly panicky as he argued. "Somebody's got to watch Yachiru!"
"As I said before, Zaraki, lieutenants are welcome as well." Unohana repeated gently with a calm smile. "I'm sure Yachiru would enjoy coming." A hint of a smirk passed over Unohana's serene smile. "Isane is giving the assistant-captains the same invitation right now."
Zaraki opened his mouth to object, his face fallen in disbelief and agitation.
"You may now leave." Yamamoto announced, heaving himself to his feet. Chairs were once more pushed back and the captains turned to file out through the door.
"Thank you." Unohana added pleasantly. She stood as well, gray satisfied eyes meeting Zaraki's. While he gaped at her, the undertone grumblings from a couple of captains didn't go unheard.
"Blast it." Mayuri Kurotsuchi swore. "A waste of time. I'm in the middle of a huge research project; I don't have time to go bathing with these imbeciles."
"This is going to be so troublesome." Hitsugaya huffed grumpily. "A day with bickering , stupid old men." The young genius stalked out with his arms folded over his chest, Mayuri following while still muttering to himself.
Kenpachi swore and whirled around, stomping away from Retsu. As he stomped out the doors, he passed his third and fifth seats, Ikkaku Madarame and Yumichika Ayasegawa lounging nearby, waitng for him. They both fell into step with him as he passed, Ikkaku resting his sword over his shoulder. Both shared a glance to each other at the angry reiatsu that rolled off the huge man.
"What's wrong Cap'n?" Ikkaku asked, turning his head and spitting to the side. Yumichika wrinkled his nose at the disgusting display and promptly patted his hair, answering for Zaraki.
"Isn't it obvious, Ikkaku? The Captain got reprimanded again for falling on the cheap excuse that spearing the koi in the central Seireitei pond is 'Wilderness Survival." The vain 5th seat smirked smugly. Ikkaku made a face at him, and then repeated his question.
"Come on captain. What'd the geezer say durin' your meetin'?" Ikkaku and Yumichika both had to quicken their pace as Zaraki gave a growl and stomped forward.
"Old bastard is makin' all the captains go to the new 4th division fancy-smanchy bath house." Zaraki grumbled. "Called it a health spa or somethin' or other."
Always the one to throw his life to danger, Ikkaku burst into loud laughter. "You hafta' go to a spa with all the other captains?" He stopped in the middle of the street, doubling over and slapping his knee. "That's great! You in a spa! I can just see you getting all wrapped up with mud and cucumbers on your face!" The bald shinigami snickered.
Zaraki growled and punctured Ikkaku's mirth. "Yer coming too, ya' bastard." Ikkaku's laughter ceased immediately as he stood up with a dropped jaw. "Ya and Yumi both. The hell I'm goin' alone."
Yumichika's reaction was the opposite to Ikkaku's. The 5th seat lit up and clapped his hand gleefully. "Oh yay! I can't wait to get a cleansing facial and body wrap and a salt glow and…" He rambled off the list of treatments he'd receive and what he'd do on his fingers. "And ooh, a manicure!"
Ikkaku stared at his best friend in a mixture of disgust and disbelief. "You fruity bastard." Although this sort of thing WAS normal for the flamboyant man.
"Keeeeennnnnnnn-cchhhhhhaaannnnnnn!" A squealing little girls' voice called out from the roofs high above. Ikkaku and Yumichika tipped their heads up in time to see a little blob of black robes and pink hair launch itself from the top of the building. Zaraki on the other hand, kept walking, and didn't even twitch when said child landed right on his back, scrambling to peer over his shoulder.
"Hey Yachiru." Kenpachi grunted, as Ikkaku and Yumichika hurried to catch up behind Zaraki.
"Nayy, Ken-chan!" Yachiru squealed in delight. "Nay, Nay, guess what!" She bounced gleefully, hyper to tell her best-friend whatever news it was she was enlightened to. "Bamboo-pole invited all the vice-captains to go swimming! Ne ne, can I go Ken-chan!?"
"Bamboo-pole?" Ikkaku questioned from behind the couple. Beside him, Yumichika heaved a dramatic sigh.
"Vice Captain, what have I said about degrading nicknames? You must call her Isane, at least dear." Yumichika held the tired and exasperated tone of a parent, gently reprimanding their child of forgetfulness.
"Oh ppuhhhtt!" Yachiru turned her head and stuck out her tounge, blowing a raspberry at Yumichika. "It's not da-rading, Frilly-brows!" Yumichika looked mildly insulted, but did not reply as Yachiru turned back to squeal in Zaraki's ear again.
"So, can I Ken-chan? Please? Please? Please please please please please please-"
"Alright!" Zaraki snarled loudly at her.
Unfazed, the little girl cheered."YAAYYY!" Somehow, without managing to fall off, Yachiru let go of Kenpachi's shoulders and threw her arms up in celebration. "Ne, Ken-chan, come too! You can bathe in smelly-full waters with bubbles! Bamboo-pole said there'd be bubbles!"
"At least then you would smell decent, Captain." Yumichika said airily behind Kenpachi. Zaraki glared over his shoulder out of his uncovered eye, but said nothing.
"I hafta go anyways." Zaraki grumbled. "Yumi and Ikkaku are coming as well." Yachiru took delight in the news and cheered again.
"Yippee! Yippee!" The little pink-haired girl launched herself off Kenpachi's shoulder and onto Ikkaku's head in a flash. "Ne, then Baldy can get his shiny head waxed!" She crowed, rubbing Ikkaku's hairless head.
"Oy! I'm not bald, brat!" Ikkaku yelled at her, reaching up to dislodge the girl. But she proved too quick and easily evaded his swatting hands, nimbly roaming around his shoulders before leaping to Yumichika's.
"Oooh, Weird-brow's feathers might come off!" Her eyes went wide as she experimentally pulled the yellow eyelash. Yumichika squawked, reaching up to shoo her away as well. But again, she evaded and energetically appeared back on Ken-chan's shoulder, peering over her own as she beamed at the two.
"Whee, we're going swimming in the bath!" Yachiru cheered again. She tugged on Zaraki's captain's robe and then nuzzled her cheek against his. "Ne, I wanna practice when we get home!"
"Fine. Whatever." Zaraki muttered. He remained quiet and sulking as the four rounded a corner and passed through the gates into the 11th division compound.
"You wanna practice taking a bath?" Ikkaku questioned in disbelief, eyeing his vice-captain.
Yumichika sighed. "Alright Vice Captain. Let's go get ready now." The feminine man held out his arms and the little girl leapt into them with a happy squeal and a prompt tug on his feathered eyelashes. "Oh, ugh, Vice Captain – are you covered in blood again?!"
Yachiru beamed up at him and nodded proudly. "Yup! I played with hollow goo!" In front of them, Zaraki grunted and grinned at the young kid's violent eagerness. "I painted you and Baldy and Ken-chan on the rock beside it too, with all the goo that came out of it! It was a piggy hollow!"
Yumichika gave a disgusted sound in response to her and turned to complain dramatically to Zaraki and Ikkaku as the four parted ways. "At least I won't be in charge of bathing her come Saturday."
Ikkaku looked over his shoulder and grinned as he followed Zaraki up to the main house. "Yah, some other poor sucker is gonna hafta!" He called back with a laugh. Turning around, he chuckled at his Captain. "With Yachiru, I think this could be fun, don't you?"
"No." Zaraki said in a flat, rough voice. "It's going to be hell."
Little reminder :) - please read and review because I would greatly apperciate that. Tell me what you liked, what you didn't like, what your favorite part was, what seemed incredibly OOC and if you would like me to contiune.
Thanks again!