AN

I kept thinking 'I really want to do a royed HpxFMA crossover fic'. So that's exactly what I'm doing! ^_^ I can only find 1 or 2 of these fics that are complete, and the rest of them are still in progress, but the last update was years ago. And let me tell you, it's damn annoying, so let's change it! A few things you should know before you read

Roy and Ed are married, Roy has been promoted to brigadier general, and Ed to colonel.

Conquerer of shamballa never happened. Ed returned to Central after getting Al's body back.

This is (light) yaoi, if you don't like it, then don't read it.

I probably won't put any lemon in. Sorry, but I can't write them.

Enjoy the fic! ^_^

Warning- This is yaoi/shounen ai. If you're not into that sort of thing, then why the hell are you in this in the first place?

Disclaimer- I do not own fullmetal alchemist or harry potter in any way, shape, or form. I wish I did, but then I would have to be a child prodigy like Ed, and would have created fma at the tender age of four.

AN #2

Alright, I'm sorry about my paragraphs, I just went through and edited all of them.


As I approached our front door, wondering what we would have for dinner, I walked in to the house and was met with a surprise. Two large, extremely full suitcases stood in the doorway.

"Roy?" I called through the house. I was pretty sure my husband would know what was going on.

"Ed, you're back." I heard from behind me. I turned to see Roy, standing at the top of the stairs.

"Hey," I said, walking up the stairs to give him a kiss hello,"Why are our suitcases packed?" I asked, suspicious of why he kept fidgeting under my gaze.

"Well, uh, you see... we have to leave for a mission tomorrow." He murmured, looking at his feet.

"What? Why didn't you tell me about this?" I said, raising my voice. He flinched slightly.

"I only found out about it today, I promise!" He said in a rush, afraid of incurring my wrath.

"Really?" I said in a threatening tone.

"Yes, I promise." He said, and I believed him.

He always had the habit of blinking rapidly when he lied, and right now he was looking at me head on.

"Alright, I believe you." I sighed, thinking about dinner once more. "Well, you can explain the details of the mission to me while I cook."


"So," I said slowly, making sure I had my facts straight,"We're going to a school for 'magic'," I scoffed at the word,"So we can protect some teenage boy from this 'Lord Voldemort'."

"Yes, that sounds about right." Roy said, ignoring my sarcasm. So I, naturally, I voiced the very first worry that came into my mind.

"Will we have to pretend that we're not in a relationship?" I said, extremely worried that I would have to hide my relationship with Roy from the wizarding just laughed,

"No, don't worry, I already requested that we have a double bed instead of two singles, and I told the headmaster about us being married. He's fine with it, in fact, he's actually gay himself... He's a very... ODD... man." I sighed in relief, and now that I had that all cleared up, I was feeling extremely tired. I guess my body had the same idea too, because I couldn't control the massive yawn that escaped my lips. Roy laughed, and his famous, trademark smirk came out,the one that always meant he was about to make fun of someone, usually me. And I was right.

"I guess such a small body can't handle so much excitement in one day." he said, taunting me.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT HE CAN'T EVEN WEAR A SEATBELT BECAUSE IT WOULD SQUASH HIM?"(AN: that was a really bad rant...)

"Well, I guess it's time we get you to bed." He said, promptly walking around the table and scooping me up into his arms. I was too tired to argue, so I rested my forehead on his shoulder and allowed him to carry me to bed.


The next day was hectic. We accidentally slept in, thus the next morning was spent running around to get ourselves ready for the train ride ahead. by the time we got to the station, we only had ten minutes to spare before the train departed, five minutes of which was spent looking for the station. we were still walking up and down between platform nine and ten when I caught a flash of red out of the corner of my eye.

My eyes widened as I saw two red headed boys run at a brick wall. I flinched and waited for the resounding crash that should follow, but never came. I stared in fascination as another red head, this time a girl, lined herself up with the wall and ran towards it, and this time I watched closely. Instead of colliding with the wall, as one in that situation should, she passed straight through. As if sensing the gaze directed towards the group, a black haired boy turned to look at them, curiosity burning in his green eyes. I tugged on Roy's sleeve.

"Roy, I think we need to go this way." I said and pointed at the large group of red heads (And the one black haired boy). The boy who had turned to look at them before must have alerted the rest of his party, because now there were more pairs of eyes, burning holes in the couple as they stared with blatant curiosity. We strolled towards them, trying to ignore the prickling sensation of many people staring at you at once.

"Uh, hi, we were just wondering if you knew how to get to platform nine and three quarters?" I asked in a quiet voice, and suddenly a look of understanding came into all of their faces.

"Ah, sorry, we thought you were muggles, because you don't have school supplies with you, just those suitcases." A rather portly woman with a kind face said, looking towards the suitcases that we had been dragging around all day. I was confused by the word 'muggle' but let it slide, just wanting to get to the platform, as they only had two minutes left to spare. Seeing Ed check his pocket watch, a thin, balding man standing with them checked his own.

"Molly! We don't have time for this! There's only two minutes until the train leaves!" Upon hearing this, the portly woman... Molly, that man had called her... Started herding the rest of the children towards the wall.

"Right, Harry, Ron, you two go first," She said, pushing the black haired boy, and another red headed boy towards the wall. They looked to be about Ed's age, Ed noted as they ran at the wall. Roy, who had missed seeing the other children do this earlier, stood staring with his mouth hanging open. Laughing at his husband's shock, he turned back, seeing that the rest of the group before them were gone, except for Molly and the man. "Right you two, just run straight at the wall." She said in a patient, yet rushed tone.

Roy stared to protest, but I just shouted, "There's no time for this!" and dragged him at top speed towards the wall in front of us. There was a strange sensation as we passed through, and suddenly, we were standing in front of a magnificent train. There was no time to admire the beautiful sight before us though, as the train started to spit out steam, getting ready to pull out of the crowded station. pulling Roy after me, we just made it through a door before the train started to move. Poking my head out of the door, I saw the man and woman from before standing on the platform, waving goodbye. "Thank you!" I shouted back to them, and saw her smile at me before she was left behind, along with the small station and all of it's inhabitants.


Once the train was steadily moving, we found a compartment, the last empty one left. Once inside, I literally collapsed onto the seat.

"Heh, tired, are you Ed?" Roy laughed, sitting down next to me so I could lie down with my head in his lap.

"You woke me up too early, colonel bastard." I muttered, the insult lacking it's usual bight.

"Hey, that's general bastard to you. besides, we almost missed the train, and you say that I woke you up to early?"

"Whatever." I sighed, not wanting to get in to this right now. Roy seemed to understand, because he fell into silence, settling for stroking my hair. We were like this for about another two minutes, before we were interrupted. A bushy brown head poked through the doorway, and her eyes widened as she saw the position that the two men were in.

"Uh... um.." She stuttered, flinching slightly at the slight anger in both of the men's eyes.

"Did you need something?" Roy asked, a slight tinge of coldness tinting his voice, and obviously impatient at the girls stuttering.

"Uh..." The girl seemed to regain control of he gawking. "We were wondering if we could sit in here, as the rest of the compartments are full..." The girl said, trailing off.

"Of course you can." Ed said, and both of them seemed happier now that the girl had stopped staring. Two boys walked in to the compartment with her, and recognition clicked in Ed's mind as he remembered seeing them with the man and woman at the train station. "Ah, you were at the train station before." Ed said, more a statement than a question. He received no reply though, as the two boys were now gawking at him and Roy, who had now resumed stroking Ed's hair.

The black haired boy seemed to realise what he was doing, and quickly said "Uh, yeah, we were at the train station. I'm Harry Potter." He said, holding out a hand, and looked as if he was waiting for them to do something. Ed dismissed this quickly though, filing it away in a draw in his brain, for more research later. I held out my hand, making sure to only grasp his lightly, so that he couldn't feel the hard steel of my automail.

"I'm Edward Elric." I said, wondering if I was known in the wizarding world as well as Amestris. Apparently not, as no recognition came to them. Still looking a bit wierded out that the two men were in such a close position, the other two stated that their names were Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. I nodded to both of them as they introduced themselves, and introduced Roy afterwards.

"So, how do you and Mr. Mustang know each other?" Was the question asked after the trio sat staring awkwardly for a short time. I tuned to see who was brave enough to ask the question, and that it was the Hermione girl. I didn't miss the hope in her voice. Roy looked up from stroking my hair, and answered "We're married, and Ed is also my subordinate in the military." I saw the hope in the girls face turn into disappointment, and I couldn't help but think 'That's right he's mine, hands off bitch!' when I saw this.

By now, there were rolling green pastures of land flying past outside the window, and we had been travelling for a fair while. Harry checked his watch, looking for an excuse to get out of the conversation that was producing tension so thick you could cut it with a knife.

"We need to go and get into our robes now." He said, and truthfully as well, as they would be arriving a Hogwarts soon. The three left, but the men didn't miss the muttered 'time flies when you're having fun.' by Ron. Once they were gone, Ed turned to Roy.

"Wasn't that fun." Roy said in a weary voice. But what they didn't know was that the fun had only just begun.


We arrived at the castle a good half an hour later, but the trio never returned to the compartment. That was fine with us, but I guess it was too weird for them. As we walked up to the castle, trying to ignore the stares we were getting because of our military uniforms, I was amazed by the sheer enormity of the castle. We marched up to the polished wooden door in an official manor, marching to suit the rather formal feel of the situation. I decided to follow the direction of the swarm of students, and we found ourselves carried into a absolutely massive hall. White candles floated above the heads of the hall's occupants, and the crisp night sky, full of shining stars was spread out above us.

As I stared with wonder, I let Roy drag me to the front of the hall, starting to pay attention as we stopped in front of an old man. 'I guess this is the headmaster.' I thought, then realised I should pay attention to what my husband was saying.

"Hello, Mr. Dumbledore. I am Roy Mustang, and this is Edward Elric, I believe you know who we are?"

Dumbledore nodded, his eyes twinkling as he spoke, "Yes, there are two seats waiting for you just over there." He pointed towards the end of the long table that seated the professors of the school. sighing, but still remembering what Roy had told me before we got off the train remember Ed, we're military officials, so we have to act polite and... well, officialish. Officialish. I wonder how he came up with the word... suddenly coming out of my pondering, I gave a careful salute, in exact synchronisation.

All we got was a chuckle, many funny looks, a nod, and lots of muttering from the gathered teachers and students. Accepting the nod as a dismissal, we quickly lowered our hands, ignoring the whispers of everyone around us as they gossiped to their neighbours. As we walked to our seats at the table, I looked around and studied my co-workers.

The most noticeable one was a woman dressed entirely in pink, a disgusting, smug, sweet look on her face that made me want to retch. I glanced at Roy, noticing that he looked the same as I felt, and I realised that I probably had a similar look gracing my own features. I looked back to the woman just as she took a sip from her goblet, and as she tilted her face into the light, she looked truly like a toad.

We had arrived at our seats by now, and I reached out to pull away my chair, but Roybeat me to it. Smirking with his usual cocky smirk, he pulled out my chair for me. With a sigh, I accepted it, to tired to yell at him as I normally would have. As he sat down on my left, a kind looking woman in a patched up witches hat sat down on my right, taking the end seat of the table. With the same curious look as everyone else we had met so far, except for the old man, she extended her left hand.

Thank god, she's left handed, she won't feel my automail. I thought as I extended my hand cautiously.

"My name is Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank, but you can just call me will, if you wish." I without nodded saying a word. "What's wrong?" She asked me, wondering about my hesitation.

"Aren't you going to attack me?" I asked.

She looked incredulous, "Why on earth would I attack you?"

"My teacher always used to attack me whenever she saw me because she said to train the mind, you have to first train the body." She just stared at me as if I had said I was secretly Elvis Presley, and my death was a very clever prank devised by me and the pixies.

"Uh, no," She said, seeming to find her voice, "I don't do that, and I'm pretty sure the other teachers here don't."

I nodded my understanding, but was quickly cut off by the sound of opening doors. A middle aged woman came in, carrying a hat, and followed by a long string of scared looking 11 year olds. The woman came to the front and placed the old hat on a stool at the front. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath, as if waiting for something, and the two military men wondered why everyone in this hall was staring at a shabby old hat. But then the hat started to sing of all things. Everyone was quiet as they listened to the song.

In times of old when I was new
And Hogwarts barely started
The Founders of our noble school
Thought never to be parted:
united by a common goal,
They had the selfsame yearning
To make the world's best magic school
And pass along their learning.
"Together we will build and teach!"
The Four good friends decided
And never did they dream that they
Might someday be divided,
For were there such friends anywhere
As Slytherin and Gryffindor?
Unless it was the second pair
Of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw?
So how could it have gone so wrong?
How could such friendships fail?
Why, I was there and so can tell
The whole sad, sorry tale.
Said Slytherin, "We'll teach just those
Whose ancestry is purest."
Said Ravenclaw, "We'll teach those whose
Intelligence is surest."
Said Gryffindor, "We'll teach all those
With brave deeds to their name,"
Said Hufflepuff, "I'll teach the lot,
And treat them just the same."
These differences caused little strife
When first they came to light,
For each of the four founders had
A House in which they might
Take only those they wanted, so,
For instance, Slytherin
Took only pure-blood wizards
Of great cunning, just like him,
And only those of sharpest mind
Were taught by Ravenclaw
While the bravest and the boldest
Went to daring Gryffindor,
Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest,
And taught them all she knew,
Thus the Houses and their founders
Retained friendships firm and true.
So Hogwarts worked in harmony
For several happy years,
But the discord crept among us
Feeding on our faults and fears.
The Houses that, like pillars four,
Had once held up our school,
Now turned upon each other and,
Divided, sought to rule.
And for a while it seemed the school
Must meet an early end,
What with duelling and with fighting
And the clash of friend on friend
And at last there came a morning
When old Slytherin departed
And though the fighting then died out
He left us quite downhearted.
And never since the founders four
Were whittled down to three
Have the Houses been united
And they once were meant to be.
And now the Sorting Hat is here
And you all know the score:
I sort you into Houses
Because that is what I'm for,
But this year I'll go further,
Listen closely to my song:
Though condemned I am to split you
Still I worry that it's wrong,
Though I must fulfill my duty
And must quarter every year
Still I wonder whether sorting
May not bring the end I fear.
Oh, know the perils, read the signs,
The warning history shows,
For our Hogwarts is in danger
From external, deadly foes
And we must unite inside her
Or we'll crumble from within
I have told you, I have warned you..
Let the sorting now begin

Everyone applauded as the hat became motionless once more, though whispers and more gossip broke through, people speculating about the hat's warning.

"That hat has a soul attached to it, I can feel the alchemical energy radiating from it." I hissed into Roy's ear, watching as he turned to me and raised his eyebrows.

"Well then, it looks like we have more to do at Hogwarts than just out original mission. This looks like it needs researching too." He whispered back, "We should find out how the person got bound to that hat, and who did it, because as far as I am aware, alchemy isn't something known to anyone but a select few wizards." I nodded in agreement, giving a brief smile before looking back to the woman who had carried the hat in; she was now reading names from a very long roll of parchment. As 'Abercrombie Euan' was placed in Gryffindor, I settled back in my chair to watch the rest of the sorting.


Once the sorting was over, the headmaster's voice echoed through the great hall once more.

"To our newcomers, welcome! To our old hands- welcome back! There is a time for speech making, but this is not it. Tuck in!" Suddenly, food appeared on the table in front of me, and I almost jumped out of my skin.

"Where is the equivalent exchange?" I asked Grubbly- Plank incredulously, scanning the hall for anything that might have been exchanged.

"What on earth do you mean?" She questioned me, obviously confused by my sudden outburst. "That was magic, you don't mean to say you've never seen magic before?" It was her turn to sound incredulous, but I ignored her, and settled for glaring at the offending food in front of me. Roy put a comforting hand on my back, seeing my displeasure at the breaking of the rule, and sat with me, both of us not eating the taboo food.


About half an hour after that, the food disappeared from the table, and I sighed with relief, but still searched for the equivalent exchange. "Well, now that we are all digesting another magnificent feast, I beg a few moments of your attention for the usual start-of-term notices," Said Dumbledore. "First years ought to know that the Forest in the grounds is out of bounds to students- and a few of the older students ought to know by now, too."

I let out a small grunt of amusement yeah right, as if these hormonal teens can get anything through their thick skulls I thought as a couple of the teachers around me turned to look and see what was so funny. I could tell Roy had thought something along the same lines, judging by the smirk he had on.

Dumbledore continued speaking, "Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me, for what he tells me is the four-hundred-and-sixty-second time, to remind you all that magic is not permitted in corridors between classes, nor are a number of other things, all of which can no be checked on the extensive list now fastened to Mr Filch's office door." He paused for a moment to smile around at all the students, "We have had four changes in staffing this year. We are very pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who will be taking care of magical creatures lessons; we also have two very interesting additions to our staff- Colonel Edward Elric and Brigadier General Roy Mustang of the Amestrian military will be doing shared teaching of two new classes. The first new subject is alchemy, to be taught to sixth and seventh years for two periods every Friday, the second subject is a hand to hand combat class for every year level." There were mutterings around the hall as we saluted.

"You didn't tell me that we'd be teaching brats!" I hissed at him from the corner of my mouth. He simply shrugged, leaving me seething.

"Hush now, hush." Said Dumbledore, trying to calm their gossiping. "We are also delighted to introduce Professor Umbridge, our new defence against the dark arts teacher." There was a short, quiet applause before Dumbledore continued, "Tryouts for house quidditch teams will take place on the-"

He broke off to look enquiringly at the toad woman that I had noticed earlier. I wondered why he had stopped talking, and apparently everyone else in the hall did, but all became clear when the toad cleared her throat.

"hem, hem" She stood up, preparing to make a speech. Oh god this will be another boring speech I thought, as she was clearly a most boring woman. She cleared her throat once more, and her voice was a stupid, high pitched squeak. Bearing her teeth at the students in what was clearly supposed to be a kind, gentle smile, she started, "Well, it is lovely to be back at Hogwarts, I must say! And to see such happy little faces looking up at me!" Sure, the kids were all staring at her, but none of them looked even remotely happy, just extremely bored. "I am very much looking forward to getting to know you all and I'm sure we'll all be the best of friends!" I watched as two students on the table with red and gold started to giggle silently, and almost, almost felt bad for the toad. but I didn't. "Every headmaster and headmistress has brought something new to the weighty task of governing this historic school..."

It was at this point that I tuned out, not wanting to actually have to pay attention, when I could be thinking about more productive things... like kissing Roy. (AN- Yup, that would be my definition of a productive thing to think about! ^_^) In fact, I was so distracted by my fantasy that I didn't come back to the real world until Roy tugged on my sleeve, and I looked around to see the students leaving.

"Come on Ed. Dumbledore wants us to grab the potter boy and go to his office."

"Uhh, right." I said, coming back to my senses after being zoned out for so long.

"Look, there he is." I followed the finger he was pointing.

"POTTER!" Several people turned around, but it was an effective way to get hi to notice me. As he started walking towards us, Roy sweat dropped.

"Did you really have to yell?" I just glared at him. "Right," He sighed, "Of course you did."

"Uh, why did you want me sir?" Came Potter's voice. I turned to see his green eyes staring at me. "You have to come to the headmaster's office with us. Also, if you value your life, never call me sir again." I replied, and ignoring his protests, I dragged him to Dumbledore's office.


Once we were all seated and cosy in Dumbledore's office, Dumbledore began to explain. I watched the boy's expressions carefully, detecting anger as the most immediate emotion.

"But sir, I can protect myself, I don't need these people to watch over me. I've always gone through all these things by myself, I don't need protecting now." The boy was so arrogant, it annoyed he hell out of me.

"Hey kid," I said, cutting him off as he was about to protest to being called a kid, "Yeah, you. Count yourself lucky. You've had a sheltered life from this war so far, being protected by Hogwarts and those around you. You don't have to be out there fighting for your life every day, and you're sitting here complaining about how you've always been alone and that you don't want our protection. Quit whinging and just let us do our job." Dumbledore and Harry both seemed taken aback by this outburst, but Harry nodded none the less.

"Ah... Good, now that that's sorted out you should all get off to bed, a long day awaits you tomorrow." He looked to Roy and Me, and handed us a map. "I've marked out where you're room is. You will be in the Gryffindor living quarters, just across from Harry's room, so as you can reach him quickly if you have to." After we said our goodnight, we followed Harry to the Gryffindor common room.


As we got to our room, I looked around. It was a cosy room, with a large, but empty bookcase, a queen sized bed, and two desks on either side of the room. A small bathroom was in there too, the door leading of from next to the bed. To tired to unpack, we stripped down to our boxers and hopped in to the warm bed.

"Good night, Roy." I mumbled sleepily, giving him a kiss goodnight.

"Good night, my Edo." I heard as sleep claimed me as her own.


AN

Okay, that was long, but I couldn't help it! I'm addicted to writing this story. I didn't want to stop, but I think I worked on this for at least six hours. I got really tired and had to sleep, damn bodily functions! Please review! I'll try and update this as soon as possible, which shouldn't be hard, because it's the summer holidays and I have no life! Btw, in case you really haven't worked it out yet, this is crossed over with the order of the phoenix! Also, it was really hard to come up with a name for this... Sorry if this has bad editing and such, but I wrote this on my mother's crappy little laptop...

REVIEW!