A/N: I was listening to this instrumental playing at the background as I typed. I got so emotional at the end that I actually cried as I typed away. (LOL) watch?v=lRQV30GV63o
Anyways, as I said in my title, I was dreaming about some emotional, angsty SouMako stuffs that woke me up 5am in the morning because it got me so excited. So, in the same day itself, I finally wrote one. Well, I hope you guys like it. :)

It was the time of the year, where the air became humid and the temperature is over 30 Celsius. With the scorching sun above, the crickets continued to creak away. Residents of Iwatobi are hiding away under any shades they could find, avoiding being under the blazing heat. A white cat hurried towards the shade under the car, lying down on the cooler ground and was about to take its nap. It became a quiet town every time during this season.

From afar, an engine roared into the small town. The cat looked up from its closed eyes, looking from under the car at the train passing by on the train tracks. As the sound went further away, it went back to its sleep. Kids who were having their ice cream sitting on the bench beside the road stared at the train moving at a moderate speed.

A man in a light blue shirt and black trousers carrying a luggage was staring out through the windows from within the train at the small town. It had been a long time since Sousuke has come back here. A town full of memories and emotions, where some of his friends still stayed and some only come back during the long holidays.

After getting off the train, he walked through a few alleys before reaching to a stop in front of some steps on his left. Looking up through the heat, he stared towards that one house just below the house at the top. After staring for a few minutes, he continued down the road.

It was an hour later when he came back to the same place he had stopped by just now. In his hands were two bags of stuffs he had just bought and his luggage and headed up the steps. Just before he reached the top, he stopped and looked towards his right at the house he was staring at before. He hesitated. Holding up his hand and putting it back down again minutes after contemplating what he should really do. He sighed and was about to continue on before he heard a voice coming from inside. The door opened and revealed a boy and a girl in their teen age.

"See you later, Nii-chan," said the teenage girl in a chirpy voice.

"Bye, Nii-san," said the teenage boy as he followed the girl down the steps.

Then, a nostalgic voice came by the door.

"Be careful alright?" said the voice of a young adult as he saw them left.

Sousuke peeked out from behind the wall of the house. He finally saw that face he had missed. The same old gentle voice, and that same hair style and colour, just that the length was shorter than before. Yet, something about him has changed. His body seemed smaller. His arms seemed thinner and his face seemed sharper, his smile was not as bright and his eyes…

"Makoto…" Sousuke softly whispered.

"Who's there?" Makoto turned around but there was not anyone. "Hm…It must have been my imagination." Makoto headed back towards the house and shut the door.

A few seconds later, Sousuke came out from his hiding place and stared at the door again. Makoto…The glow in his eyes was gone. He looked tired, but maybe it was work. Or maybe something had been going on. He was anxious for an answer but he could not think of any. When Sousuke had finally decided and was about to knock the door, someone shouted from behind.

"Oi!"

Sousuke looked towards the voice and stopped his action. A man with maroon hair was standing at the top step, smirking at him.

Sousuke smiled back and said, "It's been a long time huh, Rin?"

Back in the Nanase's house, both were sitting down on the sofa in the living room as they chat. Ever since Rin had proposed to go steady, he had decided to move into Haru's place. Rin is now a police officer in this small town, while Haru is a teacher in a nearby kindergarten. The house is still the same, still having the same ambience as he left this town for work in Tokyo.

"You still looked the same, Rin," Sousuke commented.

Rin sighed, "Really? Of all comments, Sousuke. Can't you at least say something like 'You look handsome' or 'You look tougher than before' or something?"

Sousuke chuckled, "Dramatic as always." Rin clicked his tongue but laughed along.

"You came back for holidays?" Rin asked as he took a sip of tea.

"Hm…Sort of," Sousuke replied half-heartedly.

"'Sort of'… Ok. I supposed you're here because of work?" Rin asked as he frowned. Sousuke smiled saying nothing. Rin sighed. "You could at least take some days off as vacation?"

"I don't have the time, Rin. Life as a…"

"Life as a spy is always busy bla bla bla… Sousuke, you know I've heard that a thousand times. It's because of that Ma-" Rin shut his mouth immediately and looked at Sousuke who was now staring at his mug. "Sorry," he softly said, but there was no respond from him.

As he heard the first syllabus coming out from Rin, he immediately thought of the days when Makoto and he were in back in Tokyo. Days of happiness had stayed for a few weeks and soon crumbled as Sousuke was promoted and was asked to work as a spy for the police force for investigations. At first Makoto was very supportive of him, just like always, and keeping silent of his own pain, just so Sousuke could perform better in his work. He had taken those for granted and regretted it a lot later on.

Suddenly he recalled back, the old yet new Makoto he had saw just now and could not help but asked, "How's he doing?"

Rin who was sipping his tea, trying to calm himself down stopped half way as he listened. He slanted his worried eyes and looked at Sousuke, only to see him still looking emptily at the cup. Slowly he put down his cup on the coffee table and spoke.

"Makoto…He…Till now, he…never spoke of your name…at all," Rin replied in a slow painful tone, trying not to hurt more of Sousuke's already crumbled heart. He slowly looked back up at Sousuke's face, trying to find any emotion but none. His face was just blank.

"He never…got back his memories?" Sousuke asked again, with his voice slightly shaking.

Rin stared on and just kept quiet. He could not answer him. With a 'yes' he knew he would be killing Sousuke, but keeping silent was not going to help much either.

Sousuke took in a deep breath and lay back. Eyes shut as he faced towards the ceiling. Rin frowned. He was worried about these two best friends of his. He wanted to help but he just did not know how. It was always Makoto that did these things, things like being supportive and always advising. Rin just was not the type of person for this.

"I'm sure he'll remember…someday…" Rin tried to squeeze out some comforting words.

Sousuke opened his eyes and smiled and he looked back at Rin. "It's fine. I would rather he not remember a thing though, those bad times we had."

"Sousuke, it's not your fault," Rin tried to consult him, again with the same words.

"What's he working as now?" Sousuke asked, cutting him. He doesn't need the long naggings from him right now.

"He works with Haru at the kindergarten, just so that Haru can keep an eye on him. Normally if there's any changes he would tell me immediately, but there's none. It's just like how it was back during high school period."

"That's great, then," Sousuke smiled as he replied.

"But…" Rin continued. Sousuke suddenly didn't feel like listening. "Haru noticed that Makoto had started to smile a lot lately, not that kind of genuine smile, but the kind of smile that he puts on to cover something else. Whenever Haru tries to get an answer, Makoto seemed to be avoiding it, but the answers he gave was so natural that Haru wasn't sure if he was really just plain tired or not."

Sousuke's expression immediately became grim. "When did it happen?"

"A few weeks ago, I guess," Rin replied. Sousuke only kept quiet as he thought back to the Makoto he had just met. Something definitely was going on, but if his own best friend, Haru could not even get the answer from him, something very serious must have happened.

"Can I ask a favour from you?" Sousuke asked.

"Sure, whatever I can help with," Rin replied immediately, knowing it must be something very important or Sousuke would not ask a favour from him.

"Take good care of Makoto for me, please," Sousuke pleaded and stood up.

"Wait!" Rin stood up as well and held him back. "You're not going to visit him?"

Sousuke stood still, contemplating for a few minutes before answering, "I can't."

"Why? You were about to knock the door if it wasn't for me interrupting you. You can always talk to him like how you've during high school," Rin suddenly rushed his words. He could not just let Sousuke leave without at least saying a 'Hi'.

Sousuke turned around and smiled as he pat on Rin's shoulder. "Thank you, Rin, for inviting me into your house."

"Sou-!"

"I'll be staying in the motel nearby and I planned to travel around Tottori tomorrow after dealing with some work around here. Don't call me because I won't be picking up. Thanks again and I'll see you tomorrow night, maybe."

"Sousuke! You can't just leave like that! I can't stand seeing you in pain all the time...!"

Sousuke headed towards the main door and wore on his shoes while Rin followed him still trying to convince him to meet Makoto. That was when Haru came in with his bags of groceries and stood very still when he saw Sousuke just in front of him.

"Sousuke..." he called out but was cut off.

"Sousuke!" Rin shouted at the same time.

"Haru, nice meeting you again. I'll be off now. See you." Sousuke finished off as he left the house.

Haru only stood still, not knowing how to react to the sudden greetings.

"Damn it!" Rin cursed as he stormed off into the living room.

Haru looked back at Rin as he left. Knowing Sousuke was coming to visit, Haru was just out to get some groceries to prepare dinner for the three of them, and maybe inviting Makoto for dinner as well, so that he could help repair their relationship. Yet, with the situation as it was… Haru sighed. His plans all crushed in a second.

After checking into the motel, Sousuke got his keys and headed towards his room. Throwing his luggage aside, he fell backwards onto the bed and stared towards the ceiling. Suddenly a rush of memories came back.

It was a rainy day in a small district in Shibuya when it all happened. Apparently he had not noticed that one of the gang members had stuck a mini listening device onto his jacket on the day before they have to ship off the drugs. Straight after the gang meeting Sousuke had headed back to headquarters to report. Always he would make sure that nothing was on him or anyone following him as he headed towards the headquarters. That night, however, Sousuke was in a rush. It was Makoto's birthday and the dinner he had booked was canceled because of the stupid meeting with the gang and the midnight meeting with the officers. After the midnight meeting, he hurriedly went back straight to his home but noticed something was wrong. Makoto was not home. Then, he knew he had made a careless mistake. Immediately, he rushed out looking for him. A few alleyways down he finally found Makoto, struggling while being hit by a few of the gang members. Sousuke immediately went in to save Makoto, punching away two of the culprits and dragging Makoto along, running for life. Just when they thought it was safe, a car out from nowhere came and the headlights blinded Sousuke. Makoto, in a hurry to save them both, sacrificed himself instead as he pushed Sousuke away. It was a hit and run done by one of the gang members. When Sousuke finally could see properly, all he could see was Makoto siting against the wall, motionless with the back of his head bleeding.

Sousuke could still remember it very clearly, even after 4 months had passed. He could still remember the scream he had made, the wet feeling on his palm as he tried to stop the bleeding on Makoto's head, the rush of adrenaline as all he could think of was saving Makoto. Luckily, he was in time and Makoto's life was not in danger, but there was a price he had to pay. First being the arrest of the gang was a failure as all the plans were heard by the gang. Sousuke was then forced to leave his home for a few days till the tide has calmed down. Immediately after the failed case, Sousuke had been forced to take some days off from work. He had to stay in another place as temporary shelter with one of his colleagues. Second being Makoto. The hit on Makoto's head was heavy and Makoto was in coma for a few days. However, as soon as he awakened, Makoto could not remember a single thing. The only thing he could remember was his family and his best friend, Haru.

Things were a downhill ever since and Sousuke could not even focus on his work, even after Makoto was allowed to check out and still safe and healthy. Haru and Rin was called to come pick him up and bring him back to Iwatobi, while he stayed for further instructions from the head officers. Sousuke was set to work in the station in another district, doing small jobs such as patrolling the streets or report small crimes such as theft or fights. He could not focus on work at all for that whole month, but in order to not keep thinking of Makoto, he worked hard every day, exhausting himself from day till night. After that first month, the head officers called him back for another case, giving him back the permission to work back as a spy. Sousuke was not sure at first, but decided to give it another try. Things were going well for a few weeks with cases being solved one by one, but things got worse when one of the cases had a connection with his previous case. Sousuke lost confidence and memories of Makoto dying kept replaying in his mind. Sousuke almost got killed in that case if it was not for his colleague that pulled him out of the mess. Sousuke was given another week rest to decide what he should do.

Finally, he decided that he wants to work in Iwatobi with Rin, as a small town police rather than this job he was doing, thus one of the reasons why he was back in Iwatobi right now. He was to come for a small interview and receive confirmation to work here and head back to Tokyo to report before coming back again. A confirmation from headquarters will take some time though, but for the meantime, at least he could be here, the place where he could at least be able to watch over Makoto.

Taking another deep breath, he lay on his side. Taking out the photo he had from his wallet, he stared at the cheerful lover he once had and slowly drifted off.

"Thank you for coming all the way here, Mr. Yamazaki, on a Sunday too. It would definitely be our honour to be able to work with you from now on. I'll send word to the headquarters from here but you'll need to report back too and wait for the official confirmation to be sent to you before coming back here, alright?" the 50 plus years old Chief sat behind the table and smiled as he spoke.

"Understood, sir. It's my pleasure as well to be able to work with you in the future. Thank you," Sousuke replied as he bowed while in his seat.

"You don't have to be so formal, Yamazaki. We'll soon be family here. Let's work together and bond a good relationship. But, you sure you're fine with such a small job? A person with such high qualification like you, I'm sure you can find a better job," the chief spoke as he stood.

"Yes,sir. This is the job I've decided to work in, sir," Sousuke answered as he stood up as well.

"Alright then, if that's what you want. Anyways, I'm looking forward to working with you in the future," the chief smiled as he put out his right hand.

"Yes, sir."

They both shook hands and salute before saying goodbyes and Sousuke leaving the small station. As he stepped back out under the hot sun, he wore on his cap and headed off.

Sousuke slowly walked, taking his time absorbing in all the sceneries. He walked towards Samezuka High, looking at the students working hard on the field. He passed by Iwatobi High and saw the once a 5 student group of swimmers had become a big group and practicing hard under Coach Sasabe's instructions. Then, he came to the swimming centre where Makoto used to work part-time as a coach, coaching kids on swimming. He still remembered the expression Makoto had when he coached a kid who was afraid of water. That gentle coaching and confidence boosting voice was always there when he coached.

Reminiscing the past, Sousuke decided to have a swim there. He walked in and asked for a locker key and paid the fees before entering the changing room. It was a Sunday but surprisingly not many people were there. There were only 3 teenagers playing around in the pool. Sousuke took the side where no one was using and left his towel on one of the benches. After a short warming up, he went into the pool and slowly swam. He swam from freestyle to butterfly-style and eventually ended up with backstroke. He looked up to the glass windows as he swam and slowed down to just floating on the water. People's voices were muffled by the water around his ears as he stared emptily towards the glass windows, looking at the clouds. He slowly closed his eyes and continued to float away wherever the waves bring him.

As he was slowly drifting off into that calmness, he suddenly heard muffled kids' voices. He immediately sprung up and saw a bunch of kids coming in from the changing room. Then, there was Makoto, in his same old swim trunks, being pulled by a bunch of kids towards the side of the pool. Sousuke was entranced by Makoto's well build body, albeit being a bit skinnier than before.

"Coach Tachibana, you left your towel here?" a kid shouted from a few feet away from them, standing beside the bench.

Sousuke saw the towel and suddenly turned pale. He had not noticed that he had floated to the other side of the pool and that his towel is far from him. Sousuke panicked. That towel was a gift from Makoto during one of their practices where Sousuke had forgotten to bring his.

"Eh? I don't remember leaving it there though," Makoto replied as he walked towards the kid. "Maybe it's someone else's?"

As soon as he turned towards the pool, Sousuke swam deep into the pool avoiding Makoto.

"But coach, only you'd have such a silly towel with a big whale on it," one of the kids said and they laughed.

"Hey! It's not silly. Orcas are cute," Makoto said as he pouted. The kids laughed. "Ok, back to the lesson. Line up, kids, we'll be doing our warm up now." The kids lined up as told and all of them, including Makoto faced towards the wall as they started their warm-ups.

Sousuke who was under the water took a small peek at them and made sure none of them was looking behind before he silently got out of the pool, took the towel and left for the changing room. Just as he disappeared, a kid who was not paying attention turned around and found the towel gone.

"Hey, it's gone!"

"Kei! You're not getting ice-cream after this!" Makoto scolded and continued the lesson, this time looking at them doing the warm-up. He did, however, notice that the towel was gone.

After the long swim in the pool and washing up and changing, Sousuke continued walking around the small town. He walked towards the beach and sat on a rock, facing the horizon, looking on as the sun slowly set, while his mind kept on recalling the scene of Makoto in his half naked glory.

After the sun set, Sousuke took out his phone and finally switched it on. He did not want Rin to bother him as he needed some time to relax from all those stresses he had had. As soon as his cell phone was switched on, tonnes of missed calls and messages came flooding in. Sousuke sighed. All of them are from Rin, of course. Sousuke stood up, dusted off his pants and called Rin.

"Hey, you mind if I come join you for dinner?"

Dinner was…as usual, Haru's favourite mackerel, but at least it was better than before and not weird. Miso soup was good too and it had been a long time since he ate a decent home-cooked meal. Makoto's home-cooked meal was not very well at first but from time to time, he would watch cooking shows, read recipes and soon his cooking skills boosted up. Since then, Sousuke looked forward to Makoto's home-cooked dinner every day. Those days without Makoto, however, had been… Sousuke brushed off the thought and continued in on their conversation.

Rin was all lovey dovey because he was drunk, and Haru was…something. Sousuke never knew that Haru could make such a face. He had always thought Haru was indifferent and does not show much of his expression on the surface. Definitely Rin's fault.

Looking at the clock, it was pretty late and Sousuke decided that he should leave. He stood up and was about to speak when Rin suddenly shouted.

"No!" Both Haru and Sousuke was shocked.

"I haven't even said a single thing…" said Sousuke as he sighed. A drunken Rin is difficult to control sometimes.

"You sure you don't want to meet Makoto?" Haru asked instead.

Sousuke hesitated for a moment before saying, "Sometimes things are better off this way."

"But, I'm sure Makoto would remember you somehow at least after getting to know you better," Haru tried to convince him but Sousuke would not take the chance. He was afraid that Makoto meeting him again would bring another tragedy and if it does, Sousuke would not be able to receive another stab to his heart and soul. He does not want to be the cause of Makoto's tragedy.

"Sousuke, you won't be here as often. Don't miss this chance," Haru tried to convince once again.

Haru and Rin did not know the real reason behind him being in Iwatobi. They thought he was back here only for work and short vacation. He had planned to give them a surprise later on but having both Rin and Haru thinking otherwise was making him impatient. Sousuke frowned as he swallowed back his emotions. There was no need to get angry at him. He just wanted to help. Instead, Sousuke made a small smile and said, "Thanks for the dinner. Since I'll be leaving tomorrow, I thought I should at least visit you guys tonight. Thanks for the dinner, it was delicious. Take care of Rin."

Haru sighed, "Ok. You, too. Be careful when you're heading back."

"NO!" Rin suddenly shouted again.

"Rin!" Haru tried to shushed him but Rin was furious. Sousuke rolled his eyes.

"Rin, you're drunk. Go and sleep. Goodbye," Sousuke said as he left.

Rin ran after him in his drunken state and shouted out loud.

"Makoto still loves you! How can you betray him!? Why are you so heartless!?"

Sousuke ignored his drunken yells and quickly wore on his shoes.

"Rin, you're bothering the neighbours," Haru scolded as he tried to pull him back.

Sousuke opened the door and quickly walked down the steps but Rin still yelled out.

"Sousuke, you useless idiot! Sousuke you coward! If you can't even face Makoto how are you going to work as a spy?! You might as well just quit!" Rin's furious yells never ended.

Sousuke was all ready to burst but he held in. He did not need to end his night with a terrible fight with his best friend. He had had enough for the past 4 months and enough is enough.

"SOUSUKE! Get your ASS back here RIGHT NOW Mmph!" Haru stuck his lips onto Rin's and slowly coaxing him and pulling him back into the house.

Sousuke was almost at the very end of the step where he could not hear Rin's shouts and cries anymore. Just when he stepped onto the final step, a voice came shouting his name.

"Sousuke!"

Sousuke stopped dead in his tracks. It was that voice calling out to his name. The gentle voice that he had missed, that he had want to listen for months. He could not believe his ears and was afraid to turn back, and yet he could not bring himself to move forward. He was afraid everything would be an illusion that might break him down immediately.

"Sousuke…"

This time it was nearer, and gentler. It was not a shout anymore, as it felt like only 2 feet away. Sousuke was sure that it could not be an illusion, but he was afraid. What would Makoto's expression look like if he turns back right now? He was so scared to know.

"Sousuke, please, look at me."

Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, Sousuke slowly turned around in his steps.

"Open your eyes."

"I…can't…" Sousuke replied in his shaky voice.

"Why?"

"I'm…scared…"

"Why are you scared, Sousuke?" Hands came touching his face and Sousuke shuddered. He let go slowly of the breath he did not know he held on to, and slowly brought up his shaking left hand to touch the hand on his face. From the touch, he knew it was Makoto. From Makoto's caress, he knew he should not be afraid of meeting him face to face.

"Sousuke, please…" Makoto said in a shaky voice. "Open your eyes…look at me…"

The tough feelings he had been holding back inside him was out in a second as soon as he opened his eyes. Tears had fallen out of Sousuke's eyes as soon as he saw Makoto's teary eyes glow, the glow that was not there yesterday, the glow that he thought was long gone, had appeared again. Both hands immediately were on Makoto's which were caressing Sousuke's face. Sousuke sniffed and took in a deep breath as he tried to call out his name.

"Makoto…" Sousuke whispered as he lay his forehead onto Makoto's, while hands cupping his face. "I…*gulp* I missed you…so much…"

"Un," was Makoto's only reply as he nodded. He could not bring himself to speak with his shivering breaths.

"I missed you, Makoto…" Sousuke's whispers were slowly getting louder. His hands had went down to Makoto's waist and circled around it, bringing them both nearer to each other.

"Un." Makoto had his arms around his neck, holding onto it so tight as if he would fall anytime.

"I'm sorry…"

"It's 'kay," Makoto took a gulp before replying. "You've done nothing wrong."

"No…*sniff* I did a terrible mistake…Makoto…" Sousuke's voice trembled hard as his voice got slightly louder.

"Shh…" Makoto swallowed down his saliva and he stabilized his breath before talking. "Everything's alright now. We're both fine now. So, don't worry, okay?"

Sousuke took in a few gulps before answering, "Un." This time round, Sousuke was the one to nod. Listening and touching Makoto had always healed him. He was such an idiot. The thought of trying to protect each other ended up hurting each other instead. He should have realised earlier.

Sousuke took a deep breath and spoke in his still slightly trembling voice, "Makoto…"

"Hm?"

"I'm not too late, am I?" He asked with a worried face.

Makoto chuckled and shook his head. "You're just in time," He replied as he smiled, the genuine smile that Sousuke had yearned for it, had craved for for months.

"Makoto…"

"Hm?"

"Love you…"

Makoto smiled, "Un… love you too."

Both stared at each other with their yearning eyes while hugging each other under the midnight sky, slowly rocking side to side as they embrace each other. Saying nothing to each other as they absorb the longing they have wanted for a long time.

It was after quite some time in the silence when Sousuke suddenly asked in his calm voice.

"Makoto…"

"Hm?"

"Can I stay over?"

Makoto chuckled. "Do you even have to ask?"

"Well, I'm sure your family are at home and it's been a long time since I last hugged you to bed so…"

"Hm… why not your place?"

"My place? You know I've already sold my house right?"

"Yeah, I know. I'm saying the place you're staying in for the meantime."

"Oh…it's nothing fancy but if you don't mind the thin walls…"

"Well, they're strangers anyways. I'm sure it's fine."

Sousuke smirked. "Aren't you feeling naughty tonight."

Makoto chuckled and looked into Sousuke's eyes, saying "Let me go grab some stuffs and write down a note for my family first before we go, 'kay?"

"Of course, honey, but first...something we had not done in a long while…" Sousuke's face went lower, facing towards Makoto as he looked at him, waiting for a reaction.

Makoto smiled and went in closer, placing a passionate kiss gently as they both brought their bodies nearer towards each other.

Looking out the window, Haru smiled as he witnessed the scene. "Finally…"

"Haru, it's cold in here…" Rin came up to him while he stuck his warm bare body against Haru's bare one and licked his earlobe. Haru moaned as he closed the curtain, continuing the part they have left off.

A/N: I might continue this, I think, but for now I'll mark it complete.