(All character owned, created, and copy-writed by Stephanie Meyer. Some brief parts taken directly from New Moon, some paraphrasing)

Jacob freed one arm so that he could cup his big brown hand under my chin and made me look at him. "Yeah. It was easier when we were both human, wasn't it?"

I sighed.

We stared at each other for a long moment. His hand smoldered against my skin. In my face, I knew there was nothing but wistful sadness – I didn't want to have to say goodbye now, no matter for how short a time. At first his face reflected mine, but then, as neither of us looked away, his expression changed.

He released me, lifting his other hand to brush his fingertips along my cheek, trailing them down to my jaw. I could feel his fingers tremble – not with anger this time. He pressed his palm against my cheek, so that my face was trapped between his burning hands.

"Bella," he whispered.

I was frozen.

No! I hadn't made this decision yet. I didn't know if I could do this, and now I was out of time to think. But I would have been a fool if I thought rejecting him now would have no consequences.

As he looked into my eyes I didn't know what emotion he would find, however, as always he seemed to understand it. Before I could comprehend what had happened he brought his hand down and stretched the closing gap between us back out.

"Jake I…." Then I paused as my eyes trailed down from his gaze to the floor. I didn't know how to finish the sentence. Confusion seemed to be my constant companion these days, and when he looked at me like that it made it all the harder to concentrate.

"It's okay Bella, I shouldn't have moved in on you like that." He responded as he placed two sturdy fingers under my chin and connected our eyes again. "I know you haven't made that decision yet."

How did he do that? How did he know that's what I was thinking?

"Jake I…." I started to say it again, this time in a whisper as if not to burst the atmosphere, that had been created around us, with my voice. I was afraid to break it because I liked the way it felt. I liked it when Jacob Black seemed to know me better than I knew myself. Even if the way he was looking at me now made me feel confused and conflicted, I also had to admit I liked that too. Possibly too much.

As he gazed deeper into my eyes, waiting for my response, I knew without a doubt he loved me. He didn't have to say it. He would have never have had to say it, and I would have always known. And, I liked that too. The way Jake and I could communicate so naturally, so freely. The way he understood me and I understood him without saying a word. The way I fit into his arms perfectly as if they were molded for me. How I had always liked the warmth, and he was so warm. Sitting here I could not deny how much I loved the feeling of his smoldering fingers against my face. I loved …the fact there were so many things about Jacob Black that I loved, and yet, I couldn't allow myself to be selfish and give him less than he deserved. I couldn't allow myself this happiness.

Once again, without hesitation, Jake understood. He spoke before I could finish whatever it was I was going to say.

"Bella, you make me happy, and I…I know I make you happy too."

That word, that hopeless word. It had no place in my life anymore.

"I know you Bella. You may think I don't have a clue, that I don't understand the extent of your pain, but I can see it." He paused and looked away for a brief second as if by thinking of my pain the burden was brought to him.

I looked at him, wondering what he was going to say next, wishing he could say it faster so the numbing pain in his eyes, my pain, would be able to leave him. I didn't like to see Jacob in pain, in fact I hated it. It made the edges of my hole burn. This was my burden to bear, not his. My pain, my choice. He should not have to feel my anguish.

"I know I make you happy." He repeated, looking at me intensely as if to bore the fact into my brain. "I know you struggle with the concept of being happy, but Bella…"

I cut him off there, with words I knew would hurt him. But I had to tell him. If he was going to continue to try to chase after my bled out, abused, excuse of a heart he had to know the truth.

I lowered my eyes from his, "I, I can't be happy without Edward, Jake."

I felt him stiffen, but he didn't release our hands that had magically become entwined without my knowledge. It always felt so natural, why would I have noticed.

"No Bella!" He screamed into me without raising his voice a decibel. "Don't lie to yourself. You have been happy, truly happy with me. The only reason you don't think you have been is because you tell yourself you can't be. It's in your head Bella, it's all in your head." He paused and hesitated for a second. "Even him, I know you loved him... I know you still love him, but he's become a delusion to you, like an addiction."

I looked at him, unable to utter an audible sound, dumbfounded by the truth of both of his statements. How did he know that! How could he possibly know that! I was beginning to wonder if Jacob could read my mind, but my thought was cut short when he started to speak again. He was so young, but he understood so much.

There was a new urgency to his voice now that matched the deep intensity of his dark furrowed eyes. "I'm real Bella. What we share….it's real. No supernatural games or dazzling powers. There is no fantasy to this; no magic.....I'm the one who understands you. You belong with me Bella. It's effortless for us, comfortable, easy as breathing. I won't give up on you, one day you'll wake up from this fantasy you live in with him. I won't give up just like that I'm gonna make you mine if it takes everything I have."

The reality of Jake's words crashed into me with such force, such unbearable force. I broke: physically, emotionally, mentally. I crumpled to the kitchen floor, a stream of impossible tears flooding from my eyes. Jake swooped me into his arms in one swift motion and was gently stroking my hair, my face buried into his shoulder.

Inside of me the unimaginable happened.

Break, Snap, Crack, Shatter……

My hole, my pain, my almost constant companion had shattered under the force of Jacob's words. It gave way. I couldn't keep it together under the truth he revealed. It fell like broken glass to the bottom of my being. Rather than one burning hole at the center of me – one searing agonizing pain – it had broken into a million pieces. And I knew that in this new form it could not haunt me the way it had before. I would never feel its intensity in the same way. The pain would be more manageable now.

That's when Jacob bent down closer. He brushed the hair from the side of my face, and then pressed his warm lips onto the skin he uncovered there. When he broke away, he let out a sigh and whispered, "It's going to be okay Bella. I'm here. We'll fix this thing together."

For the first time since Edward had left, I felt like I had the ability to heal. Not just a broken down house with only a few good rooms, but that I was capable of becoming a complete home. It would take years of remodeling. It would be a hard, grueling job. Despite how much I wanted Jacob to be there with me along the journey, how much I ached for this with every part of me, I couldn't ask him to. I knew he would want to, that he would fight to be the one standing by my side when the job was done. But, he couldn't be. The pain wasn't over yet. I couldn't bear to see him suffer as I went through my healing process.

At that moment the phone rang, I was so lost in thought I didn't care who it was. Jacob was to far from the phone to reach it and he didn't dare release the hold he had on me. We sat there unmoving as the rings buzzed by…one….two…three….seven total.

I couldn't help but wonder what Jacob was thinking as he watched me weep in hysteria. Would he be able to tell the difference between the tears of relief and the tears of pain?

I fell deeper into his arms. It was wrong, but I wanted to…I needed to. I had never been so close to Jacob, not in this way, and I realized I liked it. I loved the warmth of his skin, the texture between rough and smooth as his muscles contoured, the soft musky smell of him as I buried my face in his shoulder. There was so much comfort in being this close. It was more than that though. More than just comfort, it was like I was meant to be there, like coming home after an absence. It was easy.

"I love you Bella" He whispered gently in my ear. It was abrupt, but followed appropriately with my present train of thought; still the words caught me off guard. I knew it already, but to hear it, to have the words ringing in my ears audibly, made me cry harder. I knew he wouldn't go anywhere. I would have to watch him suffer with me. I hated that thought, but as I burrowed safer into his arms, I hated the thought of him ever leaving me. I needed him. I was so selfish.

"Bella, honey, what is it? Can you say something? Anything? I'm so sorry, I should have waited to tell you that….I just though maybe it would help…I'm so stupid sometimes….what a stupid move." He continued to belittle himself until finally I spoke for the first time since I had fallen to the floor.

"Why?" I began, my voice gave way and broke with my emotions.

"Why are you still here with me?" I was so broken, abused, torn and that was just my heart. I had chosen his enemy over him last night and yet here he was. "Can't you see what I've done? Done to myself by loving what…. what shouldn't be real? I….I don't deserve you."

Jacob brought his arms from my hair and wrapped them around my shoulders instinctively, burying me further into him. But this was different than the times before when he had me in a vice grip I couldn't breath in. I could still breath, in fact it was easier to breath, knowing he didn't want to let me go regardless if he did deserve better.

He was trying to keep his voice calm, but it was breaking under his emotions. He spoke with desperation. "That's…that's not true Bella … nothing could be further from the truth." He took a deep breath, trying to steady his emotions. "It's not your decision to make, it's mine, and you are worth every ounce of effort I have put into this. I won't let you go. So stop being stupid. Stop trying to push me away. I'm staying here with you 'cause that's…..that's what love's about." He stated in a sure, definite, steady voice.

I had wasted so much time, pushing Jake away from me when that's where he was meant to be. I had no doubt. I just never saw how he could cherish me. I was so weak, so fragile, so human, so plain. I had nothing special to offer him and to top it off I was scarred. But, he did love me regardless of it all, regardless of my broken state. And, somehow despite never thinking I could possibly deserve him he made me feel like I was worthy of his love. Not just because I needed it like I needed air to breath and water to drink, but by some way his love wiped away all my inferior feelings. It was just Jacob Black in love with Bella Swan. He had found a way to love me in spite of my impossible state and it was simple to him. He didn't complicate it. I would no longer keep my heart from him.

"Bella," his voice was filled with a pleading agony, but not the sad kind, it was a passionate desperation, "Bella, please don't lock yourself away forever. You deserve happiness. We are meant to be together."

As we sat there, quiet, gently rocking back and forth in a soothing motion. He was my sun, my warmth, speaking to me, reassuring me. He was calling out into the heavens for his companion in the sky, the moon. She had disappeared for too long, and he needed her back. He didn't care if all she could do was reflect his light, he didn't want her to be lost in the dark sky forever. And I knew that regardless of the new moon cycle she had been in, she was going to reappear slowly until she was full, and they were complete and together in the sky, where they belonged. The way it was meant to be. This was real, this was truth, I could not deny it. It was as much a part of me now as my hole had been five minutes before.

However, I could not renounce that I loved Edward. He was my prince, perfect, ideal, flawless….dazzling. He was more than just a saint among men, he had been my angel. But, the fantasy Edward had brought into my life, Jacob matched with his reality. Not a grueling, toilsome reality, but the things that make life worth living: the salty breeze of the ocean, laughing, smiling, family, friends, the stars in the night, watching the sun take it's place in the sky, being in the arms of the one you love. Jacob, he was the natural path my life was meant to take. He was my best friend, the one who knew and understood me. He was my soul mate.

For the first time since I had buried my face into Jacob's shoulder I lifted my head to look him in the eyes. He was staring at me, eyes tender and anguished until he caught the firmness of discovery and conviction in mine. His gaze then turned hopeful and the corners of his mouth picked up ever so slightly, the beginning form of my Jacob's smile. He hesitated, as if not to get ahead of himself just incase he had misinterpreted what he found in my eyes. Of course he would choose to be cautious now when all I wanted was for him to close the space between our lips and seal my future with his kiss. It was then that I arched my neck slightly and slowly began to close the distance between us. He caught on fast, and with a full blown Jacoby smile on his face, he finished the job for me. Our lips met with tenderness and grace. I had never imagined it would feel this good, this perfect, this easy. My free hand journeyed up his strong, muscular arm and found its precise place along his jaw as I stroked it from cheekbone to the base of his neck. His warm hands made circles along my back and shoulders with varying pressure as he would bring me closer, then release, closer, then release. The kiss burned into my being. I felt pieces of my hole slowly dissolve and vanish almost as if Jacob had set them to flame. They were helpless to the hold he had on me now, they would blow away, weak and defeated as Jacob and I embarked on the journey of life together. Because I realized that this kiss was not just a first kiss, it was also a final kiss. In this moment, with Jacob's arms blazing around me, his lips caressing mine, I said goodbye to the future I had planned on and lost, and I embraced my future with him, with Charlie, with the pack, with Emily.

When we broke away Jake looked at me bright and breathless, "Bella," he sighed, "Oh crap, I don't know what to say. I can't even think straight. All I can make sense of is…" he paused to catch his breath again, and dipped in to brush his lips against mine for a brief moment. Still in disbelief at what had just happened, at what I wanted to happen, "Oh Bella, Honey, I love you. I love you so much I just can't believe it."

"I know Jacob," I said in a smooth soothing voice, my eyes, just as bright as his. I loved the elation I was feeling, and seeing, come from him. I continued to touch his face in a soft gentle stroke, "It was nothing short of amazing."

I didn't think it was physically possible, but somehow Jacob's smile stretched further across his face, his eyes beamed with joy. "I'd say," he added as he leaned his head against the wall, let out a deep sigh, and trailed his eyes away from me to the ceiling in an attempt to keep himself from bursting with delight. He pulled me close again. I dropped my hand and found my new position nestled in his chest, his chin resting on the top of my head. I could feel his heart beating beneath the warmth. It felt like it was doing somersaults. It would figure that Jacob would have an acrobatic, graceful heart. The image made me smile to myself.

I could have sat like that for hours, buried safe in his arms with his joy and mine mingling together, creating an atmosphere that made it seem attainable to breath on the moon. My thought was violently interrupted as Jacob's body turned rigid beneath me. I should have realized my luck was never that good.