AND THEY SHALL BECOME ONE
(Disclaimer: I have no business connection with JOAN. My only purpose in writing this story is to have fun and maybe share it)
(Author's Note: This story is part of a series that takes place in the year after the JOAN OF ARCADIA TV show ended. A listing of the other stories is on my profile. The main events that have happened since May 2005 are
(1) Joan has let Grace, Luke, and Adam into her secret
(2) Luke has been promoted into the same grade as Joan, Grace, and Adam.
(3) Grace and Luke have spent two nights together
(4) Joan and Adam are engaged
(5) "Sister" Lily has married Kevin
This story is set in June, 2006)
Chapter 1 Ceremonies
Graduation Day!
The senior class was seated on the floor of the gym, with large mats to protect the floor against the chair legs (Grace observed that "it beats running in circles for no reason", referring to gym class). Joan was seated with her brother and best friends, but though they were physically together, she could tell that each had a different attitude toward the ceremony.
Grace, seated on the end of the row, seemed to be just glad to be getting out of the school. She was excited about a new job she had applied for, working for a nonsectarian famine-relief agency in some Third World countries.
Luke, who was naturally sitting next to Grace, was a little more sentimental. High school society had not been kind, but at least it was there that he met people he cared about: Glynis, Friedmann, Ms. Lischak the eccentric teacher, and above all Grace. Maybe he was putting Joan's divine friend in that category too. But that did not mean he was willing to endure another year; he was relieved that the school board had allowed him to jump a year.
Adam seemed pleased. He had once resolved to drop out if he ever sold an artwork successfully; now the graduation and the sale were actually happening at the same time. His painting of the JUDGEMENT OF PARIS had become a big hit, sparking a bidding war between a local museum and a collector in Baltimore. The bids had pushed the price up so far that he had a comfortable sum in the bank, to start off adult life with.
Joan, sitting between Adam and Luke, frankly didn't care about the graduation. She was looking forward to tomorrow, her wedding day. She and Adam had deliberately scheduled what Kevin called "the one-two punch" some time ago, leaving one phase of life and immediately embarking on another. And she was going to experience physical love for the first time, because she was the only member of the quartet to have kept her virginity up to now. That scared her but exhilarated her as well.
Meanwhile the ordeal. Vice-President Price had apparently cut costs by neglecting to hire an interesting speaker, and was giving the main address himself. He was droning on about how "we" had prepared students for life. Actually she knew nobody who felt that an encounter with Price had been a positive experience; to Joan all the school's credit belonged to a few teachers like Harbison in law and Lischak in science.
Price ended by an exhortation to the students to "march boldly into tomorrow". Then, to a smattering of polite applause, he turned from the podium to walk to his chair. Unfortunately, he stepped on the hem of his long academic robe and fell forward in a heap. That generated a lot louder applause and even some cheers. Joan, looking up in the stands, even saw her mother clapping her hands enthusiastically.
Price made a hasty exit. The remaining teachers on the dais looked at each other and finally Driesbach, the oldest, stepped forward. "Will the students now line up in the right-hand aisle for receiving your diplomas? Please arrange yourselves in alphabetical order."
They got up. "One last bit of regimentation!" proclaimed Grace.
"Actually, sorting in order is often a useful operation in systems," observed Luke.
"And it would certainly be more attractive than standing in a crowd waiting for names to be called," added Adam.
"Refuted by both Art and Science!" said Grace in mock dismay. She and Adam walked off toward the latter part of the alphabet. Joan and her brother, of course, were still together as Girardis.
Somebody put on a recording of POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE, and the line began. As Joan reached the front of the line, Driesbach handed her the diploma and whispered, "I want to apologize one last time for doubting you, Miss Girardi." He was referring to the incident in sophomore year when he had accused Joan of cheating on a test.
"It's all behind us now," she whispered back reassuringly.
After the procession ended the students were all bunched at the back of the gym, and free to mingle. Joan saw a familiar cute boy walk up in cap and gown. "Congratulations, Joan."
"Thanks," she said, shaking hands. Then she frowned. "You don't have a mission for me, do you?"
"No. To quote Saint Augustine, 'Just love, and do what you like'."
"Thank God."
"You're welcome."
She looked over His gown. "Are you sure that you're entitled to that? How many credits have you earned?"
"I can safely say that I was in every class. After all, I'm omni-present."
Joan laughed. "Did you have something to do with Price's little pratfall?"
He looked innocent. "It was an accident. An act of God."
"Yeah, that's what I thought."
The next day Joan had exchanged her cap-and-gown for a bridal dress. She couldn't think of any time that she had been out of her jeans for so long. Father Ken Mallory had agreed to conduct the ceremony, in spite of the fact that neither Adam nor Joan belonged to his church, and so Joan was seated in the Bride's Room of the local Catholic Church. Apparently it was traditional for her to stay out of sight until time came for the big entrance.
Grace came in. She was wearing a long frilly dress as the Maid of Honor, and she was looking rather awkward, as if she would much rather be riding her horse or taking part in a protest march. But she was putting up with it for Joan's sake.
"Professor Begh called," announced Grace, referring to the Muslim scholar who taught in the local university, and raised horses on the side. It was his daughter who had given Grace her palomino, on Grace's 18th birthday. "He'll send a carriage so you two can make a dramatic exit, but he'll wait until the last minute. He didn't think the church would appreciate a lot of horse crap in the street in front of their main entrance. That may just be a polite excuse for him and Maggie not to get involved in a Christian ritual."
"Talking about horse crap is polite?"
"He phrased it better," said Grace lightly, going back out.
Five minutes before the scheduled ceremony, Grace came back. Joan could hear music from the organ: Bach's JESU JOY OF MAN'S DESIRING. "Mr. Rove is here, but not Adam. Said they agreed to come separately; Adam had something to do at the last minute."
"He's supposed to be doing ME!" Joan said fretfully. "I mean--"
"Yeah, well you know Adam. I think he wanted to pack a work of art to surprise you on the honeymoon. Time flies, but art is long."
"Huh?"
"Ancient Roman proverb," Grace said, exiting again. She was more literary than she was willing to admit.
Fifteen minutes later Grace reappeared, this time accompanied by Joan's mother and sister-in-law. From outside Joan heard no music, but the rumbling of a congregation.
"How can a guy be late for his own wedding?" fumed Lily.
"Adam can lose track of time when engaged in an artwork. But today?" said Helen in confusion.
"Mr. Rove is going back to the house to check," announced Grace. "He didn't bring his cell phone."
Thirty minutes after the wedding was supposed to begin, Mr. Rove himself appeared in the Bride's Room and stammered out his news, clearly shocked himself. There was no sign of Adam in the house. All he had found was a note, saying "I CAN'T GO THROUGH WITH IT".
Joan and her mother sat in shock while Lily engaged in some very un-nunlike cursing. Finally the sister-in-law cooled down and said "I suppose we'll have to tell the guests--"
Joan had been dumped at the altar.
TBC