Chapter One
Trigger warning: self harm, ASD, and hella gayness
"We're all just specks of dust floating in bottomless pit called space..." John often pondered this subject, seeming to be forever stuck in a neverending cycle of existentialism. "We are so scared of the inevitable fate of death and the hiccup of the human memory. Even if you did something amazing you will be forgotten." "Honey, shhh, its too early." His mother hushed him. It wax never too early to have these thoughts. He smiled, and tried to ignore the demon weighing on him, his fears feeding it.
The door creaked open and a familiar man peered through. "John Laurens, it has been so long!" The top heavy man bellowed, John flinched at his volume.
"H-Hi Dr. W..." he avoided eye contact with the man who hand taught him and seen with him through so much. The one he could hold eye contact with. Currently.
"Wrists." The doctor commaned. Johns mother looked away. John hesitated before rolling up his sleeves and showing the doctor his wrists with so many red ribbons wrapped around them.
"Oh, John..." Dr. W sighed, taking the skinny boys wrist to further examine. "You promiseed me youd stop."
"For the week..." John muttered. "You said for the week". The doctor sighed, turning to the young mans mother. "He going to have to stay for a while. I mean, more then 3 months." His mother was shocked but looked over to her son and nodded in agreement. Dr. W took the young man by the arm to direct him out the roomJohn looked back at the room. Three Creaky black chairs sat, two facing one of them. He waved goodbye to his mother. She warmly smiled and waved her son farewell before breaking down in tears and curling up into a ball in those uncomfortable chairs
Her baby was hurting himself. Not in the name of self hatred, but stiming. Or maybe pure masochism.
"Theres a boy we have." Dr. W said to John as they walked down a long hallway on their way to another assessment.
"Mm." Laurens responded. 'Woah you guys have a boy? Wow could have never guessed. " He thought.
"You'll like him, he's from the Caribbean."
"Mm."
"He's here for severe PTSD. And he's on orphan. So he's got no one but his cousin. His cousins in here too for suicidal tendencies." Dr. W tried to connect with this boy. He knew this boy had ASD, therefore he was in his own bubble of a distorted world.
They finally got to the assessment room. A black lady wearing a black blouse and pencil skirt was waiting with a clipboard full of forums to fill. Dr. W left the boy nervously with this new women Laurens didn't know.
"Hi John, my name is Faith." The lady held out her hand and John blankly statred at her. She cleared her throat and went on to the paper work .
"So you're here for self harm?" She asked, reading the reports.
"I suppose."
"You suppose? '
"Its stiming but whatever."
"I see." She asked John all these questions and he answered as if he was living the good life. He just isolated himself
"Well... we will work on healthy stiming habits, okay?" John nodded and left. A bag of toiletries, clothes, and drawing supplies awaited him on the floor. He picked the bag up and walked into the door next to the assessment room with it in hand. A small bathroom. He changed into purple sweatpants and a black tee shirt with a turtle on it. The dress code was all black clothws, but John was the exemption. A small turtle stuffed animal was at the bottom of the clear bag.
"Shelly!" He softly squealed and hugged the toy. He scooped the bag up and went to the living area. Two boys say at the large coffee table between the TV and couch. The one, that looked about 17 shot his head up at Laurens. The other looked to be around 15. They were both slightly tan, but not as tan Laurens, with black hair. Nothing remarkable, but the younger one seemed... radiant.
"Hey... new kid. We're the Hamiltons." The olderone said and gestured to the younger boy "He's Alexander. Just call me Hamilton." Alexander waved, not lifting head up from his paper.
I sat down, getting my sketch book and a pencil out. I began drawing the basic geometry of a turtle when Hamilton got up. "I am going to eat something, Alex." He lipped 'be nice' and left.
A few moments passed the sound of pencil scratches filled the quiet, blue room
"New kid-" Alexander spoke, only to be interrupted by John "I'm not new and names Laurens."
"Okay, Laurens. Whatcha drawing?"
"A turtle"
"Cool."
'What are you writing? "
"A poem... wanna hear a joke? " Laurens hesitated before saying yes, jokes were always hard.
"What to you call so famous turtle? A shellebrity." John laughed wildly with no comment from Alex. Most people stop stareand say it wasn't that funny... but Alec just smiled and chuckled.
Maybe Dr. W was right... John did like this kid... so far...