a/n I got the idea for this last weekend while playing Kings Cup. I warn anybody who tries to play this game to not do so with alcohol the whole time… you get drunk right fast… But I was like… wouldn't it be funny if Jim held a game of Kings Cup? So here it is…

Disclaimer: I own nothing… well not true, I own the OC's but that's it…

Anyway, on with the show.

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The Rules

"Ok." Jim Kirk starts off with a mischievous grin, looking around at the gathered individuals, standing at the front of the table like a king surveying his subjects. McCoy, Evelyn, Gaila, Christine, Brian, Randy, and Rob, and of course, Jim Kirk, are gathered around a table that has a rather large cup in the middle, and various bottles of liquor and beer spread out on the rest of it.

"The Rules."

"Dammit Jim! The rules for what?! You drag me out here-" McCoy starts working himself into what promises to be a good rant but is cut off by Jim before he can really get going.

"Boooones! Calm down. This'll be fun!!" Jim holds his hands up placatingly. Evelyn rolls her eyes and sighs.

"So it'll end in an arrest then?" She sneers slightly.

"Oh, come on you two," Brian starts "just give it a try, ok?"

"Yeah! Have some fun you two! You spend so much time buried in texts and studying, you need some good old fashioned fun. You know… fun?" Gaila says with a huge smile, waggling her eyebrows a bit on the last word. Evelyn stares at her for a long moment before shaking her head.

"Yeah… fun!" Jim grins hugely.

"That's it. I'm done."

McCoy stands up, but Christine tugs on his arm slightly.

"Just give it a try…"

"Give WHAT a try?!" He snaps out in exasperation.

"Maybe if you'd give him a chance to explain the game…" Randy says, sounding impatient. Jim laughs.

"Yeah, back to it then. The Rules to Kings Cup."
"It's a drinking game right?" Rob asks confused, looking at all the alcohol. "I've never heard of that one…"
"It's only the BEST drinking game EVER!" Jim's grin widens. McCoy sighs and slumps forward slightly rubbing his forehead, Evelyn sighs leaning back, rolling her eyes again.

"Careful with the eye rolling, Evy… you might actually do some damage one of these times." Jim says, grinning as he pulls something out of his pocket. All at the table eye the pack of cards that Jim produces dubiously, he shuffles through them, taking some out. When he's done, one each of the numbers and face cards have been taken out.

"So, there's a rule that applies to each of these cards, we shuffle the deck and draw the cards randomly. Whatever it comes up, we have to do." He pauses dramatically, and looks around. Randy sighs.

"Ok, I'll bite." he says "What are the rules for the cards?"
Jim grins hugely. He makes a show of picking up an Ace.

"The Ace is Sociables. Everyone raises their drink, cheers, and drinks. Two is for you, meaning that whoever draws a two gets to pick someone around the table to take a drink. Three is for me, when you get a three, you take a drink. Four is for whores… don't be insulted ladies!" He flashes a grin at the women. "It's an honor to drink at the Kings Cup table!"

"For the love of God…" McCoy mutters.

"Five is up high… last person with their hand in the air takes a drink. Six is for dicks… that's fairly obvious I think… Seven is waterfall. This is my personal favorite."

"Oh, so the rest of us will hate it then?" Evy asks, with a painfully fake cheerful smile. Jim fakes a pout as McCoy and Christine laugh at her question, but the pout quickly returns to his usual trademark grin.

"What's waterfall, Jim?" Gaila asks, eagerly.

"The person who draws the waterfall controls it. They start it and pick which way it goes. Everyone at the table has to start drinking at the same time, the person who controls the waterfall is the one who can stop drinking first. Then it goes around the table in succession, but you can't stop drinking until the person in front of you stops drinking… See why I like it?"
"No." McCoy answers immediately.

"Yes!" Gaila and Randy are a beat behind McCoy. Both burst out laughing and Evy tries to hide a slight grin.

"Eight is pick a mate."
"Gee, I thought you did that without having to draw a card for it, Jim." McCoy states in a practiced deadpan, much to the amusement of everyone at the table. Jim just grins at his best friend.

"This is a bit different than that. No, you draw this," He brandishes the card "and you pick someone around the table to drink with you, and of course toast each other with 'Cheers, partner!' You should be able to do that right, Bones? You're from the south."
"South, yes. But I think YOU'RE thinking of a bit further west. We don't do the cowboy thing quite so much in Georgia." McCoy states, flicking his eyes upward.

"Nine," Jim says raising his voice to be heard over them, "is for rhyme. Whoever picks the nine says a word and everyone else has to say a word that rhymes with the first one. Whoever can't think of one takes a drink. Ten is categories. Whoever draws this one has to pick a category, the wilder and weirder, the better, and everyone has to name something in that category. The first person to trip up or can't think of something has to take a drink."

"I'm not so sure this is such an easy game to play when drunk…" Evy comments doubtfully.

"That's the point." Jim says in exasperation.

"How in the fuck did I get roped into this again?" McCoy asks no one in particular.

"Because I refused to be the only relatively sane one here." Evy says in a wistful tone.

"What about the face cards?" Asks Brian, pointing to the remaining, unexplained, cards. Jim laughs and picks up the cards.

"The Jack… whoever draws this card is the Jackmaster." He grins looking around at everyone. "The Jackmaster has to take a drink whenever somebody else does."
"So, if it's a guy, and only the girls have to drink…"
"Yup! And vice versa."
"So, let me get this straight, Jim." McCoy starts in, narrowing his eyes. "They didn't do anything but draw that damn card," he points at the offending Jack, "but they have to drink every time somebody else does?" His voice is nearing a growl now.

"Yes. It gets better."

"Oh, I can hardly wait." McCoy's sarcasm is tangible.

"The Queen is questions or never have I ever. You can choose one or the other. The point of questions is never to answer the question asked, if someone asks you a question, you, in turn, have to ask someone else a question and this keeps going til someone trips up. Then-"

"They have to take a drink." The others answer in unison.

"See, you're catching on!"

McCoy and lets out a sigh that sounds a bit more like a growl. Evy looks doubtfully at him and then back at Jim.

"Jim… this really IS going to be impossible if we're drunk."

"I think Jim already said that was the point, Evy." McCoy states resignedly.

"It's no fun if the game is EASY when drunk." Gaila said, with an air of 'Duh!'.

"What about the King?" Randy asks uneasily.

"That's the best one!"
"Fuck." McCoy states.

"Every time someone draws a King, they dump a third of whatever they're drinking into that cup" he points to the cup in the middle of the table "and the person who draws the last king-"

"Oh God…" Evy says horrified.

"Has to drink the Kings Cup." Jim finishes with a huge smile. McCoy stares at him for a moment. He looks at the assorted alcohol on the table in disbelief.

"Jim, you can't be serious. With all this?" He gestures at the alcohol on the table.

"Aw, Bones! That's why it's so fun!"

McCoy runs his hands through his hair.

"This is fucking insane."

"This sounds great!" Randy laughs and grabs a beer. "Let's go!"

"God help us…" Evy states, sounding unnerved.

Gaila is staring at the one card left.

"What about the Joker, Jim?"
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot. The Joker allows the person who draws it to make a rule. Any rule, like… anyone who says the word "drink" has to take a drink! Stuff like that. I think whoever gets the first one should make a no cussing rule so Bones'll be gone in no time."

"Bastard." Everybody laughs at this almost automated response from McCoy.

"Are we ready to play then?"

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Ah ha ha. I finally got something published! And there was much rejoicing… yay. The plan here is to have a chapter on at least one incident involving each rule. I make no promises on how often I'll update… shouldn't be like… months or anything, but definitely not daily. Read and Review… I'm pretty damn sure that if you review I will be much more inclined to stay up late and write rather than sleep… (it's the only time I'm not at work/school/doing hw)