This piece is born from a few fanfics I read about Star Treck, the movie 2009, and Into Darkness. I am surprised that the character of Uhura, in her relations with Spock, is always "Nyota." Yet in the movies " there are a few scenes, when he addresses her very privately, he doesn't say Nyota, he says "Ny'hura". It doesn't seem that anyone has picked up on that. Or maybe people don't give it importance.

I have this thing about nicknames, and I believe it's worth a little insight in Uhura's memories to explain where it comes from.

About love and nicknames: He calls me Ny'hura

There is a funny thing about nicknames, especially the ones you receive: either you love them or you hate them. It often starts as a teasing, something that establishes a bond between two persons, a more private relation, like opening a special channel of communication. It's a first step from simple companionship between classmates or colleagues, towards a more concrete destination: sealed friendship. If not meant to hurt, a nickname is most of the time a token of a certain affection covered in one or two words. A way to tell the other I kind of like you, without really saying it, because Lord it could be awkward or uncomfortable, especially for boys and men to say openly affectionate things! And although male although not have the exclusivity of giving nicknames, I have to admit they demonstrate a certain talent at this exercise. They nail it.

I believe we almost all had one growing up. Well I had. Sometimes it's your family name. And for a very long time, that was it for me. I was, and still am Uhura for most people. First of all, because I do like my family name. I am proud of my family, my origins and heritage, and the meaning itself. Freedom; and I do see myself as a free, strong and independent woman. Someone who has resolutely taken an adventurous life, more than a simple career path. I have most of the time introduced myself like that. Just Uhura. Enrolling in Starfleet also made it easy to continue to be named as such, whether it was Cadet Uhura back at the Academy, or nowadays Lieutenant Uhura, Communication officer on the Enterprise.

But then people are curious, sooner or later they want to know your first name. Well, let's say men do want to know my first name. A first step to flirting, I know. And this is why I never really give my first name easily. Not because I don't want it, I also like my first name, Nyota. It's a Swahili name, meaning star. It's cute. But Freedom is strong. So between the two, I stick with Uhura. There is also another reason. As loyal as I might be in my relationships, I am not the kind who rushes to give trust, friendship, or love. And I am rather private about it. I'm never in a hurry to give my first name.

So when I told him my first name, I was well aware that he already knew it, at least must have read it as he had my file as instructor officer at the Academy. Yet for some unconscious reason, when we were formally introduced, I wanted him to hear it with the right intonation, I wanted him to know who I was. "Cadet Nyota Uhura, please to meet you". It was simple, but I clearly and distinctly pronounced my name and family name. Him, who is only called by such a peculiar name. Spock. I thought it was a strange name at first, although, in this century, it's certainly an easy one. Straightforward for sure. Yet, once I came to know him a little better, his short appellation and his identity, his physic, it all become one to me. He's such a force. And I had been attracted to him almost immediately. His scientific knowledge is of course impressive to anyone with scientific interests, which is my case. It's a fantastic challenge to be in contact with his brilliant Vulcan mind. His mathematical reasoning is just poetry to me.

But his unique ways of seeing and interpreting reality would almost always made me smile, and I quickly understood to never reduce his comments for coldness or lack of feelings. It's like his mind was perfectly compartmented, just a little bit more than other men. Rationality on one side. Actually logic almost on every side, trying to dominate his thoughts. But he did not always succeeded. And I saw him reacting at situations, and so many things mattered to him. The more I was paying attention, the more I would understand his mechanisms. His incredible respect for the others actually was one of the things that touched me deeply and I started liking him beyond rational. He would make such efforts for never hurting anyone by inadvertence. He was putting so much effort in his words, so much attention. Yet he would always speak the truth, and would not disguise it with false gentle comments if he felt it would simply complicate the situation unnecessarily. He was better with his wits that people would give him credit. You'd have to learn to read between the lines. I did. There is a reason I became a communication officer after all. And I looked forward getting close to him in all possible ways, and surprisingly, I believed he let me very easily achieve it, sometimes even favouring moments and encounters.

And after our flirting showed, revealing a truth we could not fight anymore, after our first touches and kisses and very first dates I knew he had felt in love with me too.

I knew it when he called me Ny'hura.

When we started to become more intimate, I loved how much time he took to display his physical desire of me. There was no rush, just an unexpected sensuality, a real care, a longing, and a sincerity that I felt in my heart and my core. I am not sure he was using a strategy, but he certainly knew how to build the heat between us. We would be having incredible conversations over science and the Universe, about other races and worlds, the Federation, and then, at a certain point in our evening, the physical desire would take over us. In those moments there were not many words said. As Vulcan as he may be, he is still a man, and words expressing feelings are even more tricky to him, I believe. So he would kiss me, embrace me, caress me, and I would let happily take it all.

One Saturday, we were watching a sunset, standing on the sand, in a small creek on the Pacific coast, somehow inebriated by the feeling of something so young and powerful, something we had not planned, yet was really happening. We had violated all the rules of Academy when we starting "dating" each other still being in a relationship instructor-cadet. To date, and the more I've come to know and love all his traits of character, it amazes me that he would do it, despite his absolute respect for regulations. He took that risk for me. There were just a few more weeks to go before I would graduate, but still, it was a risk for both of us. We did not talk about it. Or very little. It doesn't matter anymore now, it matters that we simply did it. I believe it was an act of bravery from both of us. Love does that sometimes, makes you braver than you think you are.

We would be careful, like that day, we had driven north towards Oregon to find a beautiful spot. It had been a perfect afternoon. Sun would be setting in a little bit, and the light was just wrapping us in gold. There are moments like that, fully blessed, when everything flows, everything is just simply natural, nothing is awkward. Not even for inter-planetary relationships. And we both could feel it. There was that light tremor in our bodies telling it all about our young impulses and the desire to be together completely.

He turned to me, looked at me deeply, and before kissing me again, he whispered "Ny'hura", with such a softness and tenderness that my entire body was not only awaken with desire, but filled with a warmth I had never expected and never felt before in my entire life. My heart almost exploded there, the feeling suddenly too big for my body.

After pulling back from that kiss, I remember I looked at him still hazed from the kiss and that wave of feeling, and asked him. "How did you just call me?"

"Ny'hura" he answered, one of his arms around my waist, and his other hand holding one of mines. Noone had ever called me that before. Noone had ever came up with that before, not even in my family. It struck me how right it sounded. How much I loved it from the first moment he pronounced it.

I slightly frowned my eyebrows, awaiting an explanation.

"I have realised you have a clear preference for Uhura over Nyota". " But you are not just Uhura to me anymore. And you are also Nyota, so I simply contracted them into one. On Vulcan, we tend to shorten our long names."

"Say it again" I ordered him softly, trying to put on a sexy serious look. He seemed a little uncertain, but executed willingly, always with that perfect tenderness when saying it:

"Ny'hura"

"Again". His eyes widened a little bit, but again, he said it, exactly the same way.

"Ny'hura".

It was his special name for me. It was his nickname for me. And it made me fall in love way over heels for him, again in that moment. He had seen me, found me, and he was able to get me in ways nobody ever did before. He didn't need to say I love you.

He had found me the perfect nickname. Something that defined his love for me, it was the best gift he could ever offer me.

I could see that his Vulcan mind was assessing if I was pleased or not. "If you don't like..". He didn't had time to finish his sentence, I remembering kissing him with such passion, right there, and I actually hold him so strong that he hold me, lifted me a little, and with that help I climbed on him, enlacing my legs around his waist, and whispered back into his pointy ear: "it's perfect."

I remember placing my cheek in the nook of his strong neck, breathing him for a second. When I unfolded my legs and he put me back on the sand, I said: "This name is just for you to say, no one else knows. Agreed?"

He nodded, with that light content dancing in his eyes, that I only was able to detect. Not many people were able to detect or understand Spock's feelings. But the same way he got me, I got him. He was pleased to have pleased me. What else can a woman ask for?

Later in the relationship, even when he had faultered, hurt me, or made the more stupid thing ever, he would approach me uncomfortably with the intention to apologize, not really knowing how to do it.

But just by whispering it, he always got me at "Ny'hura", all of his manly love contained in one simple word.

He calls me Nyhura. It's my private nickname and it's perfect. Don't repeat it though.

The end