Kimihiro Watanuki was a young man with a terrible curse. He was a spiritual medium with particularly delicious blood, so his entire life he was plagued by ghosts who always tried to eat him, until the day he became the servant of "The Space and Time Witch" Ichihara Yuuko. That was an assumed name. He had to do whatever she demanded: cooking, cleaning, helping people destroy themselves with terribly ironic curses, or today just tracking down his two friends.
Watanuki ran down the hall to track them down before they left. Luckily, neither had anything important to do today and they agreed to come. Or perhaps that was hitsuzen, inevitable fate. Kunogi Himawari, the idol of Watanuki's life, was a young beautiful girl who bore a terrible curse of fatally bad luck to those around her. The only exceptions were her enchanted pet bird and the tall young man beside her, Domeki Shizuka. Watanuki's most hated rival. He was a stoic jerk who annoyed Watanuki to no end no matter what he did. Yet fate had decided they were destined to be friends, and because of Domeki's clean heavenly aura, neither Himawari's curse nor his own cursed blood affected him. So maybe that was one good thing Domeki provided to this world. Maybe.
"It's rare for Yuuko to ask me to do anything," Himawari said as they walked to the shop, Tampopo chirping on her shoulder.
"Yeah, I know. She usually just makes me go places I don't want to go with Domeki," Watanuki sighed.
"Probably because she knows you two are such good friends," Himawari said.
"No, Himawari, that's not true at all," Watanuki said, flailing his arms.
"So," Domeki interrupted in his calm, stoic voice. "Did she say what she wanted from us?"
"Not really," Watanuki said, now calm. "Just that she wanted us all here."
"Maybe it's a party?" Himawari asked, bringing a finger to her chin.
"I doubt it. If it was a party, Yuuko would make a ton of crazy demands of me, and make me cook a bunch of really difficult food!" Watanuki said, getting more upset by the moment as he pictured Yuuko and Mokona laughing at his misfortune.
His thoughts of torture ended as he bumped into Domeki's back. "Hey, what's the big idea, you jerk? Stopping in the road like that out of nowhere!" Domeki just looked down at Watanuki with a blank expression. "What, you got nothing to say for yourself!" Watanuki shrieked. Himawari thoughtfully compared him to a hissing cat but said nothing.
"We're here," Domeki said, pointing to his right at the house that only a select few could see.
"Oh wow, I didn't even notice," Himawari said, and smiled as they entered the barrier and disappeared from unchosen mortal eyes. As they entered the realm of Yuuko's shop, twin girls like dolls opened the double doors. One had pink hair and one had blue. One dressed in white and the other dressed in black. Maru and Moro.
"The Mistress is waiting, said Maru "The Mistress is waiting," repeated Moro
Watanuki strolled in and checked the mail. Then he patted the homunculus girls on the head as Domeki and Himawari bowed in greeting. They all slipped out of their shoes and allowed the girls to lead the way to the main room. A plume of smoke drifted out when the dolls opened the doors. The room was filled with either tobacco or opium. Through the smoke, spread seductively across a red chaise lounge, lay Yuuko Ichihara. Her straight, back-length black hair crawled over her skin like a spider's weave. Her kimono was dangerously loose over her pale-skinned long legs and almost allowed her voluminous breasts to hang out.
"Hello, Watanuki," Yuuko said. Her cheeks flushed red and she stank of sake.
"OK, drunky-poo, let's make ourselves presentable. We have company," Watanuki said, and draped her kimono over her exposed legs.
"Watanuki," she teased, "were you trying to sneak a peek? Dirty boy."
"I was not! You're just drunk! I bet you and Mokona were up all night drinking again," Watanuki shouted at the woman, who made a lewd, teasing face at him, giggling behind her palm. Domeki plugged his ears, muttering about Watanuki s idiocy, while Himawari suddenly became very interested in the painting closest to her.
"Did someone say my name?" said a high-pitched, raspy voice.
From the corner of the room a black ball rolled, then revealed itself to be a ball-like rabbit, a black orb of a creature with long ears, one of which was pierced with a magic trinket. It had long coyote feet, little stubby arms, and a large blue jewel on its forehead. Mokona was both his name and his species. He was one of two existing.
"Yes, maybe you can tell us why Yuuko brought us here," Watanuki said.
"She felt... a great disturbance," Mokona said seriously.
"I fear there will be, or there may already be, intruders in our household," Yuuko said, before she poured herself a glass of water.
"Why here? I thought this place was safe. And intruders from where?" Watanuki asked.
"I don't know," Yuuko said, rubbing her forehead as she came down from her high. "It could have something to do with Sakura's feathers long story it could have something to do with that accursed wizard longer story or it could just be a transgression in the cosmos. Either way I felt five doorways opening, and to protect this world I made them as small as I could and contained them to this shop."
"Do you know what kind of people will be coming through them?" Domeki asked.
"Hard to say. The multi-verse is an infinite place. They could be friends, or they could be foes," Yuuko said with an evil grin, making Watanuki very uncomfortable. "So Watanuki, you shall check the warehouse with the pipe fox Mugetsu," Yuuko said, uncapping a cylinder. A yellow rope of fur came out and wrapped itself around Watanuki's arm tickling him. It was a magical entity Watanuki had become very close with over the past few years.
"Domeki, Yuuko continued, As long as you're in this shop you should be able to use Chi arrows, so be on guard. Search the hallways." Domeki nodded.
"Himawari, Maru, and Moro will go with you to the dining room. If you feel unsafe from what you find, run and we fill find you. Mokona will search the kitchen and I will stay here as I feel the most powerful spirit may come this way." Everyone nodded and went on patrol.
"So, are you going to reveal yourself?" Yuuko said, opening her bedroom door to find a man in a pile of his own kimonos and a large conical hat lounging in Yuuko's bed. He was an older man, but with a toned physique and very hairy. We wore his many clothes as loosely as Yuuko did.
"It would have been rude to interrupt your speech," said an older raspy voice, as a bearded, grinning face appeared from under the rice hat.
-Watanuki POV-
"Man, I can't believe Yuuko sent Himawari on such a dangerous quest, said Watanuki. Who knows what's going to pop out of these space time hole whatevers. It could be anything, and poor Himawari doesn't have much to protect her. Though I should probably worry about myself."
"Talking to one's self is a sign of mental instability. Perhaps schizophrenia or dissociative identity," came an analytical voice from the ceiling as one by one the shelves began to shake.
Watanuki screamed as the furry snake untethered itself from his wrist and grew violently into a large fox. It whined out to intimidate its opponent.
"Fascinating, said the voice. It seems wherever I have been transported to has humanoid creatures as well as shape shifters. Magic, perhaps. Mutation, possibly."
"W-w-w-who are you. S-S-Show yourself" Watanuki stuttered as Mugetsu stood before him on guard.
"Yes, forgive me. I was afraid my appearance would frighten you, though it seems you may be used to non-traditionally humanoid entities in this world. Allow me to introduce myself." He dropped down from the rafters in a blue blur. As he rose from his huddled ball his size and shape seemed impossible. He had the body of a gorilla, but his face looked more like a cat. His body was completely covered in blue fur. He wore a darker blue speedo and black glasses. As he reached out a claw to shake Watanuki's hand, he said "I am Dr. Henry McCoy, though my comrades call me Beast."
-Domeki POV-
Domeki quietly and calmly walked down the hallway until he heard a thud and objects rattling in the room next to him. Domeki peeked in the door to find a skinny human man. He had rimmed glasses, and brown hair combed to the side. He was in a barely green suit and brown tie.
"Who's in there?" Domeki asked through the door.
"What belongs to you, but other people use it more than you do?" the man asked, still shaken up by his change in surrounding. His response seemed to be instinctual.
"What?" Domeki muttered. "...Ugh, your name? The answer is your name."
"Correct." The man smiled as his head perked up, identifying the source of Domeki's voice. He did not move but stared at the door. "My name is Edward Nygma. I'm a forensic scientist at the G.C.P.D. Do you know where we are?"
-Himawari POV-
"So girls, do you feel anything?" Himawari asked.
"We feel with our hands," We feel with our feet," the two sang as they skipped through the enormous house.
"...Right. What about you, Tampopo? Do you feel any magic in the air?" she asked the bird, who just chirped. Himawari was still worried that with her famously bad luck she could come across any number of evil entities. Suddenly the girls stopped and pointed into a room.
"Someone's in there." "Someone's crying."
Himawari peeked into the door to find a girl about her age crying, curled up in the fetal position, in a room full of boxes. She had long blue hair, and was wearing a brown suit dress and large belt, with brown stockings, and a faux fur hat with a yellow butterfly on it. 'Well she appears to be human, but I shouldn't let my guard down', Himawari thought.
"Hello, is it OK if I come in?" Himawari asked. The girl nodded, so Himawari entered.
"Can you tell me why you're crying?"
"Juvia cannot feel her magic. Juvia cannot use her magic. And and and " The woman named Juvia was getting hysterical.
"What's the matter, ugh, Juvia?" Himawari asked, getting closer to the girl.
"Worst of all..." Juvia said as Himawari got close enough to touch her shoulder, "JUVIA IS SEPERATED FROM HER BELOVED GRAY!" Juvia cried hysterically into Himawari's shoulder.
"You miss your boyfriend?" asked Himawari, and Juvia suddenly let Himawari go and began to twiddle her fingers in her lap.
Well... Gray-sama is not yet Juvia's boyfriend, but he is her beloved and she likes him quite a bit," the girl nervously rambled. "Have you seen him? Has he been transported to this world with Juvia?"
"I'm not sure. We know there are many doors opened, so it s possible. What is he like?"
"Well Gray-sama is an ice mage, though if Juvia cannot use her magic in this world Juvia doubts Gray could either."
"OK, so what does he look like?"
"Well Gray-sama is very handsome. Very muscular, short black hair, clean shaven. Oh! And he'll probably be naked!" Juvia said happily.
"I'm sorry, what?" Himawari said, her face burning. There was a great crash in the hallway. Himawari, Juvia, Maru, and Moro poked their heads out the door to see the commotion. Whatever it was, was getting closer. Mokona rounded the corner with great speed.
"A summoned spirit?" Juvia asked.
"That's Mokona. Yuuko made him. In here Mokona! What are you running from?" Himawari called.
"He's trying to eat me, he's trying to cook me!" Mokona cried as he dove into the room and looked for a place to hide. He ran through Juvia's legs. She pressed her dress close, blushing.
"Who's trying to eat you?" Himawari asked.
"Could it be Gray-sama?" Juvia wondered as they watched the black ball crawl into a box.
"Here he comes," Maru and Moro said together. Himawari and Juvia poked their heads back out the door to see a man about their age round the corner. He was a slender man, very well dressed in a double breasted black pinstripe suit. He had long blonde hair that went past his left eye. His right eye had the oddest curl on the edge of his eyebrow.
"I'm not going to cook you, I just want to know what kind of spices something like you goes best with!" the young man called out, "Where'd you go you li l black bastard!" when suddenly he eyed the girls and his eyes turned into hearts. "Oh thank the gods, this world has girls, human girls, cute girls, sexy girls!" His speed increased and he appeared before the two, taking a knee.
"Bonjour, Mesdemoiselles."
"Wow," Himawari said.
"He's not Gray-sama," Juvia grunted, puffing out her cheeks.
"I am Vinsmoke Sanji at your service. I am a chef, a pirate, and a gentleman."
Himawari was lost in a daze at the man s brazen display of charm, while Juvia turned away still muttering, He's not Gray-sama.
-Yuuko POV-
"A shinigami eh? The Grim Reaper" Yuuko remarked, learning the new man's back story as he remained comfortable on her silk sheets.
"Eighth Captain, in the Gotei 13. Though, I think someone of your level of power can tell just who I am and what I'm capable of. Though I'm curious what you're capable of" The man said admiring Yuuko's body and having no shame in his brazen display of double entendres.
"Oh I could explain to you, who and what I am, but it's no fun to just throw my hand away. I can't just give away my secrets for free." Still leaning against the door frame
The man raised his brow. Intrigued at their exchanges being compared to games. "You could tell me your name. That's a universal freedom. I'll start with mine, Shunsui Kyoraku." Pulling his arms out and dipping his hat imitating a bow as he sat.
"Ichihara Yuuko."
"What a lovely name for a lovely woman." he smirked
"So what brings you to my bedroom?"
"Besides obvious reasons?" He winked "I'm not entirely sure. This could be a dream, this could be a magic curse, I could be really really drunk right now." he chuckled deeply to himself
"Now you're talking my language" as Yuuko opened her cabinet and pulled out a tall bottle of sake. Kyoraku lost his eyes of lust and perked up with earnest glee.
"So sake exists here too." He smiled
"Sake should be an absolute in every universe" Yuuko cheered pouring them both sake sets.
"Sake, silk, sex and sleep" Kyoraku listed on his fingers, proud of his alliteration.
"To hedonism" Yuuko smiled as they tapped their sets together
"To beautiful women. The only absolute" Kyoraku said with a fuzzy grin.