DISCLAIMER: Bootykallz does not own Bleach, because if we did, Bleach would a 24hour orgy.

A/N: *insert something clever and witty here* Anyways, this is a collaboration between the genius minds of Andraiyel (mwahahaha) and xXxyaoixluverxXx. 'Nuff said.

Chapter 1: Height Requirements and Broom Closets

"Welcome back children, it is a pleasure to see all of your shining faces once more. This year will be much more entertaining than the last." Aizen glanced at all of the students that had gathered around the front door of the school for the first day of the coming school year. "Please enjoy your first day, I know that I will," he finished with an evil glint in his eyes as he turned and opened the front door of the school, starting the new school year officially.

Grimmjow shuddered as he walked towards the doors. 'Man that guy is a creeper.' As he walked he was eyeing all the kids that were going to be part of this school year. Suddenly there was a feeling of despair and utter hopelessness that washed over him. 'What the hell?' he thought to himself as he turned to look for what was causing the black hole of gloom and misery, instantly spotting a dark haired, darkly clothed, emotionless Ulquiorra. "Damn emo kid," he grumbled angrily as he tried to get out of the emo boy's sphere of darkness.

"Trash" Ulquiorra muttered as he simultaneously spotted Grimmjow. This was going to be an interesting year.

"Hi Shuuhei!" Momo yelled across the school ground as she rushed towards him. "What did you do this summer?" she asked giddily in her overly sweet and happy voice.

Shuuhei glanced down at her. "Well, -"

"NO! Don't corrupt her tiny little mind with your dirty habits!" Rangiku shouted, coming out of nowhere to clasp her hands tightly over little Momo's ears. Momo smiled up at Rangiku, not understanding what she was talking about. She gently pulled her hands off her ears and giggled.

"No, I really want to know what he did. Did you go to the beach and make any sand castles? I did!"

"Well," Shuuhei continued, "I tapped a whole lotta ass," he said bluntly. Rangiku slapped her hand to her forehead and mumbled something about Shuuhei being such a whore.

Momo cocked her head to the side slightly, a confused look gracing her innocent features. "What? Were you hitting people? That's not nice!! Don't be such a Meany!" she cried.

Shuuhei shook his head disappointedly. "No, no, no, see what that means is-"

"Don't you dare! I will kill you," Rangiku threatened him menacingly.

"Do you have pictures?" Momo asked curiously. Shuuhei smirked mischievously.

"Oh yeah, I got videos. I'll show ya later if ya want."

"Yeah! I would love to see them!"

"Oh no you don't," Rangiku said as she dragged the eager Momo inside the school to help her find her locker. Rangiku finally let go of Momo as they got into the school, confident at this point that she would follow her and not go back outside to where Shuuhei was to inquire more about his summer activities. No one as cute and innocent as Momo needed to be subject to that.

"Hey look!" Momo cried excitedly as she pointed down the hallway to where a short, white-haired boy stood frozen, staring down at a small piece of paper.

Rangiku put her fingers up to her lips. "Sshh," she whispered quietly, although no one could have heard them over the roar of all the excited students. Sneakily, like the large breasted ninja that she was, she snuck down the hall to where the boy was standing and wrapped her lithe arms around his neck, engulfing his head with her boobage. "Toshy-hunny!!!" she cried happily as Momo ran over to catch up with her, a huge smile on her face as she came closer to Toshiro, who still hadn't reacted to the boobs encasing his head.

Momo's smile faltered slightly as she saw Toshiro's blank face. "What's wrong Toshiro?" she asked curiously.

Rangiku casually looked down at the piece of paper in his hands. "What classes did you- wait didn't you graduate last year?" She grabbed the piece of paper from his hands and held it high above his head as he tried to retrieve it back from her.

"Rangiku, stop fooling around!" he shouted angrily, trying with all his might to refrain from jumping for the piece of paper in her hands.

"…Special education? You got put in special Ed?! That means we have class together! You, me, and some other cool people Toshy-hunny, equals one big party! It is going to awesome!!" she exclaimed, a big grin spreading across her face as Toshiro glowered at her.

"S-sp-special education?" Momo stuttered, shocked.

"Wait, what about special Ed? Any of you guys get in that class?" Renji asked as he walked by, happening to hear a bit of their conversation. He stopped, deciding to join in. "That is such bullshit, they put me in that class again this year," he said angrily. "I don't even know why I keep getting put in that damn class, I'm only failing six out of my seven classes."

Rangiku snickered rather loudly. "Ha! You're funny. Ah Renji, you are such a dumbass."

"Whoa, wait," Toshiro turned towards Renji, staring at him in disbelief. "The school year hasn't even started yet, and you are already failing six classes?!"

"Yeah, isn't everybody?" Renji looked at him as though it were normal for that to be happening.

Momo just patted his arm softly. "It's ok Renji, I can help you if you want…" That was kind of a pointless offer, because everyone knew that Renji was a hopeless case, but nobody had told this to him yet.

"Hey wait, didn't you graduate last year?" Renji asked the short one.

Toshiro mumbled something under his breath angrily.

"What, I didn't catch that."

Toshiro mumbled a little louder, but it was still not audible.

"Dude I can't hear you if don't speak up!" Renji was beginning to get irritated.

"I DIDN"T MEET THE COLLEGE HEIGHT REQUIRMENT!!!! SO THEY SENT ME BACK INTO HIGH SCHOOL WHERE I GOT PUT INTO STUPID PEOPLE CLASSES MADE FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU!!!" he shouted so loudly that all the people in the hallway stopped what they were doing and went silent, turning towards him with wide eyes.

"Damn man, no need to be so harsh about it. That hurt," he said, looking slightly like a wounded animal.

"That is not nice Toshiro, Renji is not stupid, he is just is not as smart as everybody else." Momo said in his defense, but failing to do so.

"Thanks Momo," Renji said sarcastically. "I'll catch you guys later," he said as he walked away, having already forgotten where he was going initially.

As he was walking he passed the janitor's closet, and stopped abruptly. There were muffled sounds coming from behind the closed door. He smirked, 'Oh young love,' he thought as he started walking again, not knowing who was even in there. A few moments later a ruffled and content Shuuhei walked casually out of the closet, running his hand through his hair, a satisfied smile plastered across his face as he started towards his first period class. A few moments after that, slightly mussed Yumichika exited the broom closet, smoothing the wrinkles out of his school uniform and threading his fingers through his hair to remove any tangles.

An oblivious Ikkaku came around the corner and wrapped an arm around his waist and dragged him along through the hall, kissing him on the cheek as they walked. "C'mon Yumi it's time for first period."

A/N:

WoOt First chapter is out homies, so tell us what you think!

Andraiyel: *face/palm* god jesus that was ridiculous and I'm just glad it's ova

xXxyaoixluverxXx: the next chappie is going to be even better, more innuendos to cum and other things to *cough cough* Shuuhei *cough cough * So keep reading guys and gals... and others

Andraiyel: If you don't review I will kill babies, and kittens. Or even better, baby kittens

xXxyaoixluverxXx: kittens are baby cats silly pants

Andraiyel: just review damnit

xXxyaoixluverxXx: don't swear at the readers they'll cry * slap* WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!

Any ways that is a fancy button they got there, you guys should press it and review just suggesting though…