There was a time when he'd considered this a good idea. Back when he'd sat on a couch in the corner of the Slytherin Common Room, his head resting in Draco's lap and his hand lazily resting in Blaise's. The latter sat up from his place on the floor, putting a half-empty bottle of Firewhiskey on the table and looking at the other two. "What we need is a way to make sure we'll win the next Quidditch match. We win the Quidditch Cup, we win the House Cup, Gryffindor loses. Win-win—hic—win."

"And how are we supposed to do that?" Harry asked, grinning at Blaise.

"Lucky potion."

"Lucky potion?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "Felix Felicis. Not the kind of thing you want to get caught using in competitions, but…"

"But we won't get caught," Blaise finished simply. "Only question is how do we get the ingredients?"

Harry was sure there were more questions to consider: how to find the recipe, how to even brew the potion, how they were going to manage to make and consume it without anyone noticing. "The apothecary in Diagon Alley does owl orders, doesn't it?"

"Sure," Draco said. "But that could take ages to arrive. Next match is in two weeks, and we'll need time to brew it."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

Draco paled and looked at Harry. Harry was hoping he wasn't thinking what Blaise was thinking.

"Snape's got everything in his storeroom."

Harry shook his head, trying to talk himself out of the idea as much as he was trying to talk Blaise out of it. "We can't break into Snape's private storeroom," he said, dropping his voice to a whisper as a group of seventh years passed behind them. "Are you mad?"

"You got another idea? 'Sides, what Snape doesn't know can't hurt you!"

Blaise sat back against the coffee table, giving them both a satisfied grin. Draco raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "You can't actually be serious about this." Blaise's expression didn't change. Draco sighed. "You honestly think he won't catch us? You're thicker than you look, mate."

Harry sighed. "Nah, he's just lucky we love him."

Draco's head whipped around to look at Harry. "You're not honestly going with him?!"

"We both are. Come on, we can take my cloak."

.

In hindsight, they could have been quieter as they snuck out of their dorm and down the corridor to Snape's storeroom. They'd made sure to stow the bottle of Firewhiskey at the bottom of Blaise's trunk, and they'd been lucky enough to avoid running into anyone on the way through the dungeons. This was likely due to the fact that it was far past curfew, but Harry wasn't questioning their luck. "Okay, you know what we need?" he whispered to Blaise.

"I've got the list. Draco, you're on lookout." Blaise turned to the lock, muttering, "Alohomora," and tapping it with his wand. The lock clicked and the door swung open.

Harry couldn't help it—his jaw dropped at the sight of the varied bottles and vials of potion ingredients. They were fascinating. They only worked with the most basic ingredients in classes, but here Snape had all manner of highly dangerous, expensive, and poisonous items. Harry would've loved the chance to simply peruse the shelves of the small room.

"We haven't got all day," Blaise hissed, putting the list of ingredients for Felix Felicis on a small patch of empty shelf space between them. "Let's get what we need and get out."

They turned in opposite directions, searching through the oddly shaped glass bottles, the boxes, the containers of bundled herbs. He stashed a couple of the listed ingredients in his pockets for lack of anywhere else to put them. It wasn't long before his robes were bulging out at the waist. Blaise smirked when he looked at Harry again. When he turned around, Harry moved a bit too quickly and his pockets made him a bit larger than he normally would be. He heard the smash of the glass before he saw anything break. Harry looked down at the shelf at his side. A thick, orange liquid was seeping across the wood, a pile of shattered glass resting beneath it.

"Shit." Blaise glanced over his shoulder, noticing the puddle of potion.

Harry waved his wand. He hurriedly muttered, "Evanesco," and watched with horror as not just the spilled potion, but the entire shelf vanished before his eyes. "Shit."

"When they say destroy the evidence, they don't mean destroy half the bloody room, Potter."

"I'd like to see you do better," Harry retorted. "Can you bring it back?"

Blaise mirrored Harry's hopeless expression. For all the practice they'd had in class with vanishing objects, never had they learned how to bring back what they'd made disappear. "Let's just hurry up. If we get out of here quickly he won't even know it was us—"

His words were cut short by Draco knocking against the storeroom door. It was their signal—Snape was coming. Harry suddenly felt more sober than he had all night. They could hear Draco's voice on the other side of the door. He was trying to buy them time by distracting Snape. Harry turned to Blaise in a panic. "Take it or leave it?"

"Leave it. We can come back another time."

Harry nodded briefly, turning back to one of the other shelves. He emptied his pockets, stowing the various ingredients behind a relatively large bottle of Skele-gro on a top shelf. Hopefully, it'd be out of the way enough for Snape to not notice the items being out of place. He gulped, nervous. Harry wished they'd already had some Felix Felicis; it'd sure be a big help right about now.

"And is there any particular reason you're here of all places, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Oh, no sir. Just… just finishing off rounds and heading back to bed."

There was a pause, and for a moment, Harry thought they'd done it. But then… "You're a terrible liar. Now, are you going to tell me what's really going on or should I check for myself?"

"I—I…"

The lock outside the door clicked, and the wood of the door that Harry had been looking at was replaced with the black of Snape's robes. Draco was barely visible behind him, clearly still trying to think of an excuse to get them out of trouble. There was no hope for it now, Harry figured. Snape had already caught them breaking into his storeroom; even if they weren't being caught taking anything, this still didn't look good for them.

His Head of House made eye contact with him, and Harry felt a shiver run down his spine. "What do you think you're doing in here?" Snape's voice was deathly cold. Harry still held onto the hope that he hadn't noticed the missing shelf of ingredients. However, as soon as that thought crossed Harry's mind, Snape's eyes flit down to the exact spot that was left vacant. "Explain."

Harry turned to Blaise, then back to Snape. "Professor, we were just—"

"Just breaking into my private stores, stealing my ingredients, and damaging half the room?"

His face fell, but he kept trying. "We didn't steal any—"

"No doubt that was your intention. Am I wrong?"

None of the boys said anything. Snape looked at each of them in turn, his constant expression of pure apathy was unwavering, but there was a fire behind his eyes that told Harry that this wouldn't end well.

"And you thought, what, you'd come in here in the dead of night, drunk by the smell of you, and act like barbarians, ruining my stores?"

Harry couldn't find his voice. Everything Snape had said was true, and Harry didn't want to admit to any of it.

Snape's eyes narrowed as he looked back at Harry. "Out," he snarled. "All of you." Before he shut the door, he turned on the three of them. "Return anything you've taken to me, now." Harry and Blaise exchanged a look.

"We didn't take anything, sir. Honest. We accidentally vanished one of the shelves, we weren't sure how to put it back. But we don't have anything." Blaise didn't mention that it was Harry who had vanished the shelf. Harry was grateful for this.

Snape turned back into the room. With a wave of his wand, the missing shelf reappeared, stocked as fully as it had been before. Then, he turned back to the group. His eyes bored into Harry's, then Blaise's, until he appeared satisfied. "Very well. If I notice anything else missing, I will hold the three of you responsible, is that clear?"

They nodded. Harry swallowed hard.

"The three of you will also have detention for the next two evenings. I expect better from my House. Now, get back to your dormitory."

.

A/N: Written for:

Cards Against Humanity Day 2: Destroying the Evidence;

Pokémon Gym: Poison Type Gym – (location) Snape's Storeroom;

Cheese Board: Breads and Crackers, Sourdough – (word) shatter;

Funko Pop: The Hulk – 3: (word) Smash, 4: (potion) Skele-gro;

Writing Club – Disney Challenge D3: "What [name] doesn't know can't hurt you!"; Book Club – Yoshimine: (word) Barbarian, (color) Orange, (emotion) Apathy; Showtime 18: (character) Severus Snape; Amber's Attic 6: Write about trying to distract someone (Bonus); Love in Motion Traid 2: Harry/Draco/Blaise; Liza's Loves 1: Write about a Slytherin; Angel's Arcade C1: (color) Black;

Insane House Challenge 997: (first line) There was a time when he'd considered this a good idea;

365 Prompts: 312: (word) Nervous;

Scavenger Hunt: Write a fic about your least favorite character;

Seasonal – Days of the Year – Mar 15: Write about someone being dumbstruck or left speechless by something; Winter Prompts: (word) Shiver; Elemental: (word) Puddle; Slytherin Challenge: (character) Severus Snape; Star Chart: Quadrantids Meteor Shower: (dialogue) "You can't actually be serious about this.";

Writing Month: wc 1477