A quick note. I apologize in advance for this being short but I couldn't bring myself to add to it. The next chapter will be longer I promise. Also I typed this on my phone with no spellcheck. Ignore any typos that I missed. This is for Reiuki. I hope you enjoy it.
Chapter 1: A Part of You.
The bed in the grungy motel room was the furthest thing from comfortable as could be. The floor was probably softer but he couldn't bring himself to move from his sitting position at the head of the bed to the floor thanks to his drinking binge. After sitting there for hours he simply did not care anymore. There was too much Hunter's Helper in his system to care about anything which is exactly where he wanted to be. Numb. He hardly noticed that his legs were starting to fall asleep from his cross-legged position and lack of movement.
Dean Winchester took another drink from the half empty, half gallon, bottle of Black Velvet in his hand. It was not his drink of choice but it was cheap. He hadn't given much thought about what to get when he walked in the liquor store. It was what caught his attention so it was what he brought home. It tasted like ass but it got the job done. Another bottle, this one empty, sat on the floor beside him. With everything that was going on he deserved a little numb.
With Sam being soulless was bad enough but when Dean found out about the Campbell's and their shoot first as questions later outlook and secrecy it got much worse. Samuel was taking advantage of Sam being a robot to kill anything that might be a threat not caring who got in his way. Nobody was really sure about what was going on with them and Sam wasn't talking about it- not that it mattered when even with a soul his brother was the best liar he knew. There was no way he could trust anything the man said now. That is where he was, Dean knew it. With the Campbell's. His family. Dean took another drink. They weren't his family Dean was the only family he had left not counting Bobby. Samuel only cared that he didn't have to do his own dirty work.
How many lives had been lost at the hand of his younger brother as he did Samuel's bidding? How many more would die because Samuel told him to? The thought ate him up inside. He took another drink to drown his feelings.
Dean wanted to get the hell out of Dodge, leave Sam with his so called family but he knew he wouldn't. He had nowhere to go and he couldn't bring himself to leave without him. He briefly thought about Lisa and Ben but drowned the thought with more whiskey. It would be dangerous to be around them with his job. Ben had already been kidnapped once before he wouldn't let it happen again, nor would he let something happen to Lisa. She wouldnt be like what happened to Karen, Jess, and his mother. No it was safer away from them. He could always go to Bobby's but he didn't want to be a burden on the older hunter. He had other things to worry about other than the boys fighting again. Dean had never felt so alone. He couldn't even talk to Castiel thanks to the war in Heaven. There was nothing left to do but drink.
When the bottle was empty he threw it against the wall in front of him. Damn it! He wasn't feeling numb anymore, instead he was only getting angry. When was he going to catch a break? When was the universe going to say " okay Dean, I'm done screwing you over. Enjoy your happiness"? What had happened to swearing to stop hunting after killing Azazle? Why did bad things have to happen to the Winchesters?
Forcing his legs to move he wiggled his way down the bed far enough to lay down. Hopefully sleep would keep the pain away for a little while. He prayed that the nightmares of Hell didn't come and make things worse since apparently drinking the pain away was no longer an option.
After the feeling in his legs came back Dean began to count. 1... 2... 3... on and on till 392 when he finally fell into unconsciousness.
...
The midnight sky was alive with stars. Comets flew across the sky in bright arches with no clouds obscuring his view. Actually, he had a perfect view. There were no trees, buildings, or telephone wires anywhere. Nothing but him, the sky, and the Impala he sat upon. Everything was perfect. He wasn't sure how long he had been sitting there, studying the placement of the stars and playing the biggest game of connect the dots, before he remembered reading something somewhere about how the stars were named after angels as well as ancient heros. He wondered which one was Castiel.
"Hello, Dean." The familiar gravely voice snapped the hunter out of his thoughts. Castiel appeared beside him with the sound of fluttering wings.
"Hey Cas. What are you doing here?" He didn't want to sound as if he was accusing the angel of anything but he was surprised to see him. Wasn't he supposed to be fighting in the war?
"The war can wait. I am here to answer your question." Cas looked to the sky as he spoke. In the beginning, when God created Heaven and Earth, on the fourth day he created the stars. What the Bible does not say is that he created them with the Grace of his angels. The star created with my Grace is much to far away to see with the human eye." He looked at Dean, his blue eyes boring into him. "Would you like to see it?"
Dean felt a smile tug at his lips. "Yeah, I would." Reaching out, the angel placed two fingers on the younger man's forehead. The stars and space began rushing at them. Dean tried not to look away but found it difficult as the motion made him feel sick. When everything stopped moving Dean was breathing in short gasps, attempting to keep the nausea at bay.
"This is my star." Dean looked at the new sky before him. The sun that was made from the essence of Castiel had no planets but rings of clouds and smoke surrounding it like the rings of Saturn. It was the most beautiful thing Dean had ever seen. He could only stare open mouthed at the vision only he had ever seen.
It was soft, barely heard, but it was said all the same: "It is also yours."
Dean turned to look at the angel beside him. "What are you talking about?"
Cas licked his lips, something he had picked up from the human. "When I raised you from perdition you were broken. Your body from the Hellhounds, your soul from torturing souls and the abuse you had sustained from the years of killing. I could not merge them together with all of the damage so I repaired you." His mouth formed into a tight line.
"Repaired how?" For a moment he thought about angelic duct tape and gorilla glue. He shook the thought away.
Cas tilted his head to the side. "I used my Grace as an adhesive. I put you back together again, Dean. I know every part of you inside and out. Body, soul, and mind." He smiled then, it was small but there all the same.
Dean had no words, his mind blank. It was as if he had list the ability to speak. Castiel chuckled, a sound he had not heard before from the straight faced angel, before bringing his face closer to Dean's. He placed a gentle, chaste, kiss on Dean's lips before pulling away. It lasted only a moment but he could still feel the heat from the angel.
"You are never alone, Dean. I reconstructed you using my very essence. I am a part of you and you a part of me. I am always with you."
Dean sat up in bed. The room was dark but he was sure it was still the same motel room he had fallen asleep in. If it was nothing but a dream then how was it he could still feel the angels lips on his own?