I hate to be denied
How you hurt my pride
I feel pushed aside
But laugh, laugh, laugh
I nearly died

Laugh, I nearly died - The Rolling Stones

Ok... Maybe it wasn't exactly that what dad ment when about him taking care of his baby brother and tried to blend in, but come on... Dad wasn't comimg back until late at night, if – and that's a big if – he didn't find something else to kill out there and stayed away for another whole week – let's face it, it wouldn't be the first time – and Sammy was starting to forget the color of the sun and the sky.

Dean already said 375 times that they were "yellow" and "blue", in that order, but it didn't help. Not even one of the three hundred and seventy five times helped. At all. And he knew he couldn't leave Sam alone... Not after Fitchberg – because even if the possibility of ruining it all and let Sammy die wasn't terrible enough, the punishment and the silent treatment dad gave him for a whole freggin month was even worse – and if he was going to desobey dad's orders, he was going all in.

If you keep staring at me me with that look on your face, I'm gonna lay back down on that bed and won't move an inch until I'm hungry again! And just so you know, I got 4 packs of M&M's stashed under my pillow!

- Dean – Sam whined, doing that face – You have a knife under your pillow.

Yeah, right, like something like that could keep him from having a snack down there also...

- What can I tell you, Sammy? Work and fun can too wal side by side! – Dean smirked and Sam's face turned even more sour.

Dean shrugged, he really thought it was best not to do anything against dad's orders, even if he too was bored out of his mind inside the room.

- Did you mean it? – Sammy asked, suspicion coloring his tone – About going out?

- I did, but you just stood there, looking like an ass and complaining 'bout my totally reasonable stash of candy...

- No! – the younger one nealy yelled – No, no! I wasn't complaining, really, I wasn't... I just...

The look Sam casted his brother was pitiful, desperate.

- I can't hear you, Sammy... – Dean sounded distracted, fliping through a magazine without actually seeing the pages.

- Can we please, please, go outside?

- Just 'cause you said please.

- Jerk

- Whiny bitch.

Sam was just about ready to start bouncing off the walls, full of restrained energy and Dean wondered if a leash would really be that evil.

- Where are we going?

- We can't go too far, dad's coming back and I don't want him to find us gone.

Dean almost heard Sam's eye roll.

- What?

- Nothing, Dean – Sam sighed.

Oh, that wasn't the end of it... There was a lecture coming in five, four, three, two, one...

- It's just that... – this time, Sam huffed – Why do you always have to do what dad tells you? He isn't God, you know?

- Yeah, I know... 'Cause if there was a God, you would know when to shut the hell up.

That did shut Sam up, but the way he shoved his hand in his pockets and began to kick the ground where classic signs that the fight wasn't over.

Making himself that a deep breath, Dean decided to pretend that no, there wasn't a huge black cloud hanging over their heads, but he couldn't help but to wonder when was the last time that they just talked without trying to bite each others heads off.

- There's a park over there – Dean pointed – We could go over there, kick the kids off the swings or something...

- Swings are for babies! – Sam grumbled, kicking a can loudly.

Dean shrugged.

- Well, I like it.

The walk felt longer with the heavy silence, but neither of the boys seemed willing to say anything else. Dean started to question if going out had been a good idea at all, especially when Sam had all those hormonal issues, probably had his period or something, 'cause it just wasn't possible to just one kid bitch so much and-

- Maybe the swings could be cool – Sam mumbled.

Stealing a look of his brother, Dean smiled.

- Whatever you want, Sammy – he said, because on that precise moment Sam was Sammy.

Sam wrinkled his nose, disgusted.

- I think I'm way too big for you to call me that.

- Call you what, Sammy?

- You're such a jerk...

- No I'm not, I'm awesome.

As promissed, Dean kicked the kids off the swings and Sam just couldn't hide how excited he really was.

It really was fun, or maybe staying in that crappy motel room made any dumb thing cooler than the best circus ever.

At least that was Dean's opinion, he liked circus. Sam, on the other hand, prefered to stay at a safe distance from any colorful wig and red nose. A safe distance of 500 miles.

- Look how high I can go! – Sammy yelled, throwing his head back.

- I can't!

- Why not?

- I'm going so much higher than you!

They bet on who could fly the highest, but it was a tie since Dean got tired of the game and jumped off the swing. His knee hit the ground, besides that, the landing was perfect.

Sam's eyes shined with awe, he could do the same, but he was groing into those ackward teen years and didn't have Dean's gracefull moves, not by a long shot. As far as Sam knew, Dean never even had an ackward fase. Gracefull jackass.

- We gotta go back – Dean said looking up.

- You can't tell time by the sun's position – Sam argued.

- But I do recognize the sunset, genius.

- Five more minutes, Dean... Just five more minutes!

Dean looked up and his lips started moving lightly. Sam was sure the older one was making calculations of the how long they would take to get back and what time dad said he would be home, and the kid's eyes rolled on their on account. Obviously they were breaking the rules, but Sam couldn't see what the big deal was! Of course he knew about the stuff that dad killed, he had even been there during a couple of the blood baths – and had to stich Dean up a lot more than a couple of times – but it there still was daylight, nobody there knew who they were and they could defend themselves pretty well and-

- Let's go, princess.

- What? No, Dean! Five more minutes, pleeeease... – Sam couldn't quite explain the look he on his own face, but he knew that it made Dean give in 99% of the times.

- The five minutes are over, Sammy – of course that this time was going to fit in the freggin 1%.

- Oh, yeah, like you spent the last five minutes thinking if we could stay five more minutes!

Dean shrugged.

- But it is so, little bro... I'm a guy that doesn't do much thinking, but when the thinking begins, there's a real effort to it.

- You suck! – Sam bitched, getting off the swing – That's what you are, a sucky guy!

But Dean wasn't paying atention anymore.

- Let's go, Sam.

- What? Why?

- Don't argue, let's just go!

Sam didn't find anything that could be that worrysome. Ok, it was really getting dark and they had to walk back to their room and there was a guy looking at them in this creepy kind of way- Oh... it was probably that.

Without anymore complaints, Sam followed Dean closely, glued to the older one actually, 'cause he knew that if he needed any kind of protection, it would come from his brother.

It wasn't his favorite subject, since it made Dean sad, but Sam had stopped trusting his safety to his father a long time ago. Not entirely, after all he knew what John Winchester was capable of, but... When you're never there, it's really hard to protect anyone.

- Who is that, Dean? – Sam asked in a whisper, even if it wasn't necessary, instinct always spoke louder.

- No one.

- Then why are we walking so fast?

Dean glared at his brother for a moment. Goddamn, this kid asked a lot of questions!

Maybe it was best to answer, silence only scared Sam all the more, but the truth is that Dean had no idea who the guy was, just had a felling of impending doom weighting on his shoulders. It always happened, if there was anything wrong, Dean felt a pressure point between his shoulders, on the base of his neck. A beginning of a neck pain that made his movements stiff until the thing or person that was bothering him went away.

And that dude bothered him. Maybe he had seen him before, it felt like it, a kind of déjà vu over seeing the guy on the same shop he bought Sam's cereal, and next to the motel's desk, and... It couldn't be the same guy, could it?

Anyhow, being the same dude or not, Dean had the need to put himself and his brother as far away as possible from the creepy looking guy.

xo0ox

John felt so ridiculously tired that the mere sight of the motel sign almost brought tears to his eyes. Everything that he went through didn't matter anymore, the creature was dead, his boyes were right there and he could finally rest.

He parked the Impala close to the bedroom door and he had barely turned off the engine when he realised that there was something just not right. Nothing seemed diferent, but still...

The he got it. Dean wasn't peeking through the door or the window and every time John got back the older boy was craning his neck through any crack he could find just to get a glance of his father before sneacking back to bed and pretend he wasn't hovering. It didn't matter what time it was, Dean knew the sound of the Impala, would recognize it even in his sleep, but this time? No sign of him.

Fighting against the overwhelming desire to run inside to check on his boys, John let the hunter take over and walked silently to the door, and dammit, he was really tired, so patheticly tired that only now he saw that the fucking door was off it's hinges, just leaning over the place it was supposed to be, keeping the inside of the room away from strangers eyes.

And if it had to be hidden, it simply wans't a good thing.

- Dean? – John called – Sammy?

- Dad? – Sam's small voice answered.

John pushed the door, making it fall to the ground and there was so much to see in the room, that for a moment, he couldn't see a thing.

When he finally focused enough, the firt thing his eyes met was his eldest son, with a blood trail running down the side of his face, holding a shotgun pointed directly at the door.

- Son? Put the gun down.

- Dean, it's dad! – Sam claimed from his hiding place.

Dean didn't seem to believe even for a second.

- No.

John stepped fowars slowly, apprehensively, he had tought his sons that they were never supposed to point a gun at someone if they didn't mean to shoot, and indecison wasn't Dean's problem at that moment.

- He crossed the salt line – Sam tried to calm his brother down.

- It's broken – Dean answered in a blink – It's fucking useless.

- Language, boy – John warned automaticly.

- Yeah... – Dean laughed curtly, without any humor – Good one. Sounded just like him.

What happened there? What the fuck was all that?

- Dean, it's me...

- Dean? – Sam called.

The boy stepped back, the gun didn't waver, still locked on it's target, he peeked from the corner of his eyes to check what Sam wanted and nodded.

On the next instant, John was soaking wet and Sam had disappeared back to his hiding place behind the bed.

Holly water.

- Is that proof enough for you? – he asked Dean, relief flooding his body at the sight of the precautions the boys were taking, but still yearning to run to them.

But there was no reply from Dean, who just kept staring at his dad with wild eyes, weird and disturbed.

- Christo – Dean said quickly and it felt like a long minute until he blinked again.

John never breathed for the same amount of time, then risked a step foward and the shouldes of his eldest relaxed. Cue the running.

- What happened? – he asked, kneeling in front of the boy.

- I'm ok. Check Sam.

And that's what John did, checked the youngest, looking for an explanation that he probably wouldn't be getting from Dean for a while.

Sammy got up slowly, his eyes darting around the room before settling on his father.

- A guy broke in. He knew we were alone, said that he tought we were sleeping, but that with the both of us awake it would be a lot better anyway – he scratched his head, sitting down on the end of the bed – He didn't know who we were, he wasn't a... Wasn't anything supernatural. He didn't know we knew how to use guns, and also didn't know that the guns we knew how to use were loaded.

By the nunber of times Sam repeated the word "know", it was pretty clear how much the boy was shaken, even if he was pretending not to be.

- Did you shoot him, Dean? – John asked while searching Sam for any wounds, but beside a bump in the head and a few scratches, he seemed fine – Dean?

But the boy was still standing in the exact same posision, the shotgun pointing to the door, just waiting for something stupid enough to cross the threshold.

- He just bled – Dean mumbled – There was no smoke, no disapearing into thin air, he just... looked in pain and surprised. Because he was human.

Sam's jeans had blood on them, but it was a small cut, John was still worrying about it when he heard the kid call his brother.

- Dean? – and when Dean never answered – Dad?

- Son – John tried to sound gentle and loving, but was out of practice – It's over.

He pushed the Dean's gun down, making it touch the floor, then repeated:

- It's over.

For the first time, the boys's eyes were not on the door, trying to figure out why he was aiming at the floor, then looked at his father.

- Is it really over?

- Yeah, son... It's over.

How could I not have noticed his eyes? John wanted to kick himself. He wasn't sure under the faint light, but Dean's pupil seemed blown, making his eyes look dark, and suddely that wound on the side of the kid's head seemed so much more important.

- You know, dad... – Dean began, slowly, eyes moving constantly between the door and his dad – The suff we hunt, the ghosts, those creatures, all that supernatural crap, I kinda get. I mean, they're just doing... what they have to do! But people, regular humans... They're crazy.

John was lost in thought – part of him just agreed with his son, the rest just felt bad for the kid, knowing those kind of things at such a young age – when Dean's eyes rolled to the back of his head and his legs weren't able to hold the weight of his body, making him crumble to the ground.

- DEAN! – Sam yelled, but John caught his son before he could hit the ground.

Well... The kid got that right. People were crazy.

xo0ox

Dean was tired. Infact, he felt like he had died and someone warmed his putrid corpse, because there was just no way thar anyone could feel that tired.

Then again, with my luck...

Why is the store so foggy? Oh... It was just the thing that was missing, needing glasses. Dean bowed his head and rubbed his eyes.

They needed a break. The fucking Apocalipse was there, of course they needed a break. The problem was, beyond the end of the world obviously, was that no one had a break to spare.

Sammy was diferent. Dean ran his hand over his face again, of course Sammy was diferent, that bitch Ruby made sure to mess up his head... At least she was dead. But they still needed a break.

About one thing that annoying bitch Ruby was right, after seeing Hell first hand, Dean couldn't even look at the TV if Hellraiser was playing. But then again, reality made Pinhead look like child's play.

Dean walked into the store thinking about his brother. He wasn't sure if he could trust Sam's judgement anymore, after all, the guy lied, drank demon blood, and freed Lucifer. I just broke the first seal, no biggie.

Squeazing his eyes, trying to get things back to focus, he picked up a pack of peanut M&M's, his mands well trained in the art of finding-not-so-eatable-and-potentialy-deadly-stuff, but Dean knew it was better to eat all the junk food he wanted now, because things being the way they were, there was just no way that he would get to grow old and actually have a problem about his eating habits.

Beer, snacks, hmmm... Twix. Ok, the fruity stuff Sam asked for... Yeah. Time to go back to the nasty motel bedroom, take a shower on the desease infested bathroom, and throw himself into the filthy bed to get some peacefull sleep. Like things could be that simple.

His foot barely touched the sidewalk in front of the store and Dean already knew that there was something wrong. He couldn't see anything diferent, but that pressure point on the base of his neck was pointing out – pretty loudly, if you ask him – that something was just not right, making the hair at the back of his neck stand up. And he didn't have even 40 minutes of any kind of his so much wanted sleep.

The comforting weight of the gun on the back of his pants made him keep walking, especially because Dean still didn't know what was happening and keep moving was just as good a tatic as any.

Dean was at the room's door on half the time he took to get to the store. Nothing showed up, but the feeling remained.

- Sam? – he called, opening the door and fiding his brother passed out on the bed further from the door.

Legs hanging out of the matress, fully dressed. Apparently Sasquatch was even more tired than Dean had assumed at first. But the thing is, Dean was still up because the Wookie just had to have that fucking bread that looked like shit and tasted like paper, so...

- SAM! – Dean yelled at the top of his lungs, kicking his brothers legs.

- What? What? – Sam jumped out of his skin and found Dean smiling, sitting on the edge of the other bed – What, Dean?

- I brought the stuff you asked.

- You didn't wake me up just for that. – Sam waited an answer, any answer – I hate you.

- Ah, Sammy... I couldn't let you sleep all crumpled up like that! – Dean smiled and popped a couple of M&M's into his mouth.

Sam only glared back and Dean's smile grew wider.

- Aren't you going to talk 'bout what hapenned? – Sam asked lowering his voice.

- It already hapenned, can't do anything about it anymore.

- Dean! We opened Lucifer's cage! – Dean arched a brow – Allright, I opened Lucifer's cage. Even after everything that went on with Ruby, you're just gonna let it go?

- Yup.

- You know we need to talk about this.

- No, Sam! – Dean got up – I know I need to take a shower and go to bed.

- But, Dean...

Dean answered by throwing his t-shirt at his brothers face and disapeared into the bathroom. If they didn't talk about it, it wouldn't exist. Yeah. Dean was sure of that. Almost.

The hot water falling on his shoulders made everything seem so far away, wich was a good thing since sooner or later, Sam would get them to talk. And a fleeting thought made Dean wonder what would happen if that talk came after a relapse from Sam. He had already killed Ruby so this time he wouldn't have anyone to lash out on.

That bitch.

When he came out of the bathroom, Sam was already sleeping again, this time in a more conventional position, even if it didn't really appeared comfortable.

Actually, he looked strangly like a pretzel.

Still, following his brothers lead, Dean just let himself fall on the bed, pretending he hadn't been avoiding the talk with Sam for a month now, pretending that no, that's not the Apocalypse knocking on my door, thank you very much, and finallt, pretending that yeah, God's in heaven, everything is allright with the world.

The next morning and Dean was still pretending. Not 'bout the Apocalypse, that was kinda hard to ignore, but Sam? He could actually look at Sam and see the too tall gangly kid that should move ackwardly, but didn't. The nerdy know-it-all kid, Encyclopedia of the Weird, that asked too many questions and always gave crap to dad. And not the guy he called a brother, but wasn't even sure if he knew him at all.

Ok, maybe Dean wans't pretending all that well, but nobody could say he didn't try.

- Breakfest, Sammy? – he asked while finishing cleaning the last his blades.

- Dean...

Oh Jesus... That tone again...

- I'm hungry, Sam – Dean stated, going to the door without a look back.

- This has got to stop now! – Sam demanded.

Dean closed his eyes, a hand on the doornob.

- This is going to stop when I say it has to stop.

He opened the door and was faced with bright shining eyes.

- DEAN!

Sam's voice screaming his name was the last thing Dean heard before everything vanished.

A/N.: So yeah... There ya go! My first Supernatural story ever, and the first thing I wrote in english that didn't suck.

At least I think so, you guys are actually gonna be the judges of that... So... Be gentle? I wrote all of this in portuguese and translated it, and that's harder then writing directly in english, so I'm not sure if everything is understandable.

But, if it helps, I promisse that I'm gonna get better!

Hope you like it, and hoping even more that you send me some love by clicking in that cute little button down there and send me some feedback!

See ya next time!