Something with puppies
Ok, I've decided to start a series of one shots that help me blow off creative steam (steam is very creative –nods-) so I can actually write my serious stories. This way, the plot bunnies will stop eating my soul! :D right, well this first one shot is for DGM-yaoi-lover who gave me the idea! Her stories are awesome so go read them!
General Info: Various pairings, all unrelated one shots, ranging from humour to angst. Enjoy!
Info on this one shot;
Chapter one- something with puppies
Prompt- puppies (from DGM-yaoi-lover)
Pairings- none, just some silliness :D
Rated for swearing
On to the disclaimer!
!!(:D)!!
Lavi: Hey Nella?
Nella: yes Lavi?
Lavi: do you own D. Greyman?
Nella: ... –mumble-
Allen: what was that Nella Chan?
Nella: I said no... –Pouts and crosses arms-
Allen: well at least you can watch/ read/write fan fictions about it!
Nella: ... true... THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL BETTER ALLEN!! –Glomps-
Allen: O.o your welcome?
Lavi: on to the one shot!
!!(:D)!!
Lavi walked down the street whistling cheerfully to himself. Having just completed a mission successfully he was in a pretty good mood as he walked through the small town that was very near to the order. The town was full of life as people walked hurriedly from place to place, children darting between them, laughing and playing in the warm summer air. The red head smiled to himself as his feet carried him towards his destination. A sudden noise from an alleyway as he walked by caught Lavi's attention, and being the ever curious redheaded trouble maker he was, Lavi decided to investigate.
The alley was dark and damp, with some rather unpleasant piles of god knows what randomly sticking out of no where. Lavi looked around, confused, before the noise sounded again and he turned his attention to a rather clean looking cardboard box. Lavi peered into the opening and a wide grin appeared on his face. This is going to be fun...
!!(:D)!!
Allen sat comfortably in one of the benches of the order cafeteria, happily stuffing his face with ungodly amounts of food.
"Allen..." a voice said from a very short distance from his ear. Allen yelped and jumped a good meter and a half in the air (that would be roughly three feet give or take.)
"Lavi?! What do you want and why are you creeping up on unsuspecting boys while they're eating!?" Allen grumbled as the redhead laughed.
"Geez Allen! You make it sound like I'm a pedophile or something! Don't say a word." Lavi glared pointedly at Allen who had opened his mouth to say a snappy comeback, "Anyway, I want to let you in on my most recent adventure!" Lavi struck a pose, and Allen raised an eyebrow.
"Adventure...?"
"Come on!" Lavi grabbed the younger boy by the hand and started to drag him out of the cafeteria, with many wondering and slightly suspicious eyes following them. Lavi's 'adventures' were usually pranks.
"B-but Lavi!! My dango!!" Allen cried in anguish as the older male dragged him off, reaching out for the abandoned treat.
"Don't worry Allen; you'll be glad that you came!" Lavi grinned back that the teary boy, as he mourned the loss of his dango, before opening his door and leading the boy into his room.
"I better be, or I may just kill you." Allen glared sullenly as Lavi grinned nervously.
"You really shouldn't hang out with Yuu-Chan so much..." Lavi laughed and picked up a somewhat clean looking cardboard box, setting it gingerly on his bed.
"Look in here, and you'll forget about the dango, I promise!" Allen raised an eyebrow, but his curiosity got the better at him.
"There better not be something nasty in there." Allen peered into the box and his silver eyes widened in surprise, "Whoa, you're right, I am glad I came..."
!!(:D)!!
"We can't keep them here!" Kanda stopped as he heard a familiar voice.
"What? Why not?"
"Well for one thing this place smells like gym socks."
"WHAT?!"
"And besides, Kanda's room is near here, what if he hears them?"
"..."
"The he would tell Koumi and Koumi would do some horrible experiments on them!"
"No!! Not my babies!" Kanda raised an eyebrow at that.
"... You gave birth to them?"
"... figuratively speaking, yes. I found them, ergo they are my babies!" Kanda rolled his eyes as he pressed his ear to the door.
"Well, do you want your err, 'babies' to be in a place that smells like gym socks? Near a murderous samurai who will rat us out to an insane scientist?"
"OH MY DEAR GOD!! We must get them to safety! ... But where?"
"My room? There aren't many people in that area, so if they make noise, no one will be bothered by it. And it doesn't smell like something died in a men's bathroom, was dragged through a trash dump and rolled in a cow yard."
"... It doesn't smell that bad does it?"
"Yes Lavi, it does."
"Oh... I should get some air fresheners then huh?"
"Please do."
"Well, lets get these guys back to mommy Allen's room!"
"... Mommy Allen?"
"Well yeah, I found them; therefore, I get to choose which parent I am. So I'm the daddy!"
"Why am I a parent again?"
"Because I told you about them first silly!"
"...That's stupid."
"I don't care! Let's just go!" Kanda hurried down to the other end of the corridor, and watched as Lavi and Allen emerged from Lavi's room carrying a cardboard box. Now, our dear sweet Kanda isn't usually one to pry, but as they say, curiosity killed the cat, and in this case, Kanda is our cat! Said exorcist crept along behind the pair who just so happened to be stealthily creeping along the hallways towards Allen's room them selves. After several minutes the three teens reached Allen's room, while the two of them went inside, leaving poor Kanda to sulk and eavesdrop outside again.
"Awww they're so cute!"
"Aren't they?"
"What should we name them?"
"Names? I'm not so good with names, what do you think?"
"Well, the reddish one makes me think of you, so let's call him rabbit!"
"Yeah! And the golden one Banzai!"
"... Banzai?"
"I told you I was bad with names..."
"Whatever, Banzai it is. What about the black one?"
"Hmmm... it has an awfully grumpy face..."
"..."
"..."
"Yuu-Chan? Is that you?" Kanda froze. CRAP! Did they find out he was listening in?
"We can't call it Yuu-Chan! Kanda would kill us!" (A silent sigh of relief here.)
"Well, is it a girl or a boy?"
There was a pause, and some rustling then, "A girl."
"Then Yui-Chan! That's a girl's name!"
"Well, if Kanda ever finds out, and he kills you, I am not to be blamed."
"I'll put that in my will."
"Good." Kanda sighed. Damn it all to hell. Curiosity-1 Kanda-0. He reluctantly raised his hand and knocked on the door, and all sounds behind it stopped.
"W-who is it?" Allen called.
"It's me. Let me in, I want to know what you have in that damn box." Kanda growled.
"..."
"..."
"Yuu-Chan... is... CURIOUS!?
"IT'S THE SIGN OF THE APOCALIPS!!"
"GET UNDER COVER!!"
"WAH!"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME IN DAMN IT!" Kanda yelled and there were some whispers from behind the door as the Japanese swordsman seethed.
"You think... –whisper, whisper-"
"I don't know... –whisper- trust?"
"-Whisper- promise –whisper-..."
"Alright then."
"Yuu Chan! Before we let you see our magical box of sex toy- OW! Allen! That hurt! Anyway, before you can see our magical box- I'M NOT GOING TO SAY SEX TOYS! DON'T HIT ME AGAIN- you have to promise not to rat us out to Koumi the mad man!" Kanda scowled.
"Fine. Unless I think it's stupid."
"Fair enough." Allen opened the door and Kanda walked in, wrinkling his nose at the weird looking room.
"Do you have some kind of fetish moyashi?"
"Fetish?" Allen asked innocently.
"..." Kanda stared for a moment.
"..." Lavi stared for a moment.
"Never mind then." They said in unison, waving their hands to dismiss the matter.
"Now, what is in that damn box?" Kanda demanded spotting the offending item on the floor. Lavi grinned and picked up the cardboard apparatus before stalking triumphantly over to Kanda.
"For the record, I knew you were following us, I just wanted to see what you'd do." Lavi grinned and Kanda raised an eyebrow.
"Whatever, open it." Lavi's already face splitting grin widened even more as he lifted up the lid of the box and Kanda peered inside. He blinked as four little pairs of eyes stared back at him. He lifted one of the owners of said eyes and peered at quizzically.
"Is this a sewer rat?" both Lavi and Allen choked on air as they stared at the slightly confused face of Kanda Yuu.
"Yuu! How could you say that?! It's a puppy! Isn't she cute! We named her Yui-Chan, because she has a grumpy face." And indeed the little black puppy did. She glared in a dog like manner (because I mean, come on, how else could she glare?) at the Japanese man holding her by the scruff of her neck. Kanda rolled his eyes, making a mental note to murder Lavi at a later date and looked back into the box. There was a pale golden coloured pup with shaggy fur, a reddish brown pup with a goofy looking dog grin, and a timid looking white and black puppy.
"Why do you have four dogs?" he asked as he placed the grumpy looking Yui Chan back into the box.
"Well, I found 'em on my way home and they were just too cute to pass up! I'm their daddy, Allen is their mommy and now, they have an Uncle Yuu Chan!" Lavi chirped and Allen rolled his eyes. Kanda's hand twitched towards Mugen threateningly and Lavi took it as his cue to shut the hell up.
"What have you named them...?" Allen gaped for a second at Kanda before grinning. Curiosity-2 Kanda-0
"I didn't know you liked dogs Kanda, I always thought you would be a cat person."
"They're loyal and dependable. They do as they're told and don't question you. Cats are quiet and clean up after themselves, but too damn annoying. Now what are their god damn names you idiot bean." Kanda glared holes into the boy who sweat dropped.
"Well, the reddish one is rabbit, the gold one is Banzai," Lavi grinned and nodded, proud he had named the pup, "The grumpy one is Yui Chan apparently and we haven't named the last one yet."
"Panda."
"What?" Lavi and Allen asked in unison, blinking in surprise at Kanda.
"Name it panda. Look at its eyes, it looks like it has rings around them." Kanda shrugged, as if he didn't care and the younger two exchanged looks of fear.
"The world is ending." Allen whispered loudly.
"Should we just let it come or hide and cry in an unmanly manner?" Lavi whispered back.
"Hide and Cry." With that the two of them dove under Allen's bed, and proceeded to weep rather loudly. Kanda rolled his eyes dramatically.
"I'm taking the dogs to my room to train them idiots. I wouldn't trust four innocent animals with you two morons." And with that Kanda left the room.
!!(:D)!!
"Hi Kanda!" Lenalee chirped as she saw the swordsman stomping down the hallway, lugging a cardboard box.
"What's that?" she asked eyes wide as Kanda rolled his eyes.
"Lavi found some puppies and he and the bean are too busy crying about the world ending to properly take care of them, and there is no way in hell I would leave innocent animals in the care of those idiots."
"Oh my god, did you just say more than ten words in one sentence?"
"Shut up!" Kanda walked angrily away from the Chinese girl, who followed him persistently, yapping on about Kanda and his 'more than ten word sentence and how proud she was of him.
"Damn it woman! Shut up and leave me in peace!"
"But Kanda! I want to see the puppies!"
"Fuck no! Get out of my face!" Kanda threw open the door to his room and slammed in forcefully, successfully blocking out Lenalee's pouting face.
"You're mean Kanda!" Lenalee called before wandering down the halls, looking for something else to do.
!!(:D)!!
'Who would have thought that scare tactics would work just as well on mutts as it does on the idiots?' Kanda thought with a grin scary enough to make a nun faint. The puppies sat in a row in front of him, trembling in fear of the Japanese man.
"Lay down." Kanda commanded and the pups obeyed.
"Sit." The puppies pushed them selves up hurriedly.
"Rollover." The little animals did as they were told and looked up at Kanda expectantly.
"Good." He nodded before a loud banging noise echoed through is room.
"Yuu!! You better open this goddamned door and give me and Allen back our babies or so help me I will break it down!" Lavi yelled, ignoring Allen's complaints about being a 'parent' with Lavi. Kanda rolled his eyes and put Banzai, Rabbit and Panda back into their box, before throwing open the door and shoving it into Lavi's arms.
"I keep Yui." was all he said before slamming his door on the surprised redheads face.
"NOOO! Kanda you bastard! You stole mine and Allen's baby!!"
"God damn, it is not my baby moron!"
"Not in front of the children Allen!"
"Let him keep Yui, maybe he won't be such a bastard if he has something to take care of." Allen didn't comment on the whole 'children thing'.
"That's true! Well, Yuu Chan, I hope you and Yui Chan are happy together! Daddy loves you Yui!"
And with that, Lavi skipped along down the hall, humming happily to himself as he wondered what kind of mischief he and his babies could get into.
End !!(:D)!!
Ok, if anyone has any one word or phrase prompts for me, just let me know and I will see if I can make it into a one shot!
Wuffles and luffles from Nella! (XD)